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Dark Thoughts (Refuge Book 1) by Cynthia Sax (6)


 

Six

Dita opened her eyes as soon as Kralj fell asleep. She waited until a large ship passed overhead before slipping out of his arms. The vibrations and the noise concealed her movement.

It was one of the most difficult things she’d ever done, her soul screaming to stay, to relish the rare opportunity to be held, to be protected, to be viewed as merely a female and not as a dangerous assassin.

When he touched her, she felt almost normal. That was a secret dream of hers—to lead a normal life, an existence others called boring.

But that was not her reality. She had a vow to keep, a promise given to the shattered survivors to hunt down their attackers, to avenge their loved ones, to remove the threat to them, to allow them to sleep over their rest cycles.

Those survivors deserved peace more than she did. They were good beings, victims of other beings’ cruelty, not guilty of anything more than trying to live their lifespans, to raise families, to love.

She, in contrast, was a killer, a fellow monster Kralj had called her. Only her code of honor and her word separated her from the beings she hunted.

She wouldn’t become like them, wouldn’t break her vow.

Dita crept along the pathways, staying in the shadows. Kralj might not like her stance but he should understand her reasoning. He adhered to his own rules, would kill her for not following them.

He didn’t want to take that step, had pleaded with her to change her mind. It would cause him pain to end her lifespan.

Could she hurt him like that?

Dita returned to the clones’ domicile, hid in the darkness outside the front doors. Questions swirled in her mind, doubts about her purpose, about the actions she thought she had already decided to take.

Wait until your targets leave the Refuge and then kill them, Kralj had said.

It would take something extreme to drive them out. He’d also shared.

The sun rose slowly, fingers of pink and yellow stretching across the sky. The air around her changed, her body humming with awareness. She was no longer alone. Kralj was nearby. He was watching, waiting for her to make a move.

The doors opened. She grasped two of her daggers.

Todt-931, the leader, exited first. “How about we maim a few females this planet rotation?” He hefted the spiked club in his right hand higher.

“What does that freak say?” His clone brothers followed him. “Killing is forbidden. Maiming is acceptable.”

They laughed.

Dita’s stomach churned with disgust. She lifted her daggers, preparing to throw them, to kill them now, before they hurt another being.

The task should have been easy. They were close, unaware of her presence.

But she couldn’t do it, couldn’t release her weapons, couldn’t end their lives and hers, couldn’t force Kralj to kill her. Her heart wouldn’t allow her to give him that guilt.

She had to obey his rules. As the males had stated, maiming was acceptable. That would be something extreme. It might drive them out of the settlement.

Dita stepped out of the shadows.

The clones took a hasty step back and raised their weapons. Todt-931 had the club. The other two males drew their guns.

They stared at her.

Then the leader laughed. “Relax, males. She can’t do anything.” Todt-931 met her gaze. “If she tries to kill us, she’s dead. The freak will end her life before she touches us.”

“I was told you were tough males.” She twirled her daggers. “Yet here you are, hiding within the Refuge’s walls, afraid to face one little female.”

“We’re not afraid.” Todt-933, the smallest clone surged forward.

Todt-932, the more rational brother, held him back.

“We’re intelligent.” Todt-931, their leader, stuck out his purple chin. “And we’re not afraid to face you. We’re standing here now, aren’t we?”

“Ah yes, you’re so brave, cowering behind the settlement’s rules, knowing I can’t kill you,” she mocked, intentionally goading them.

Her targets wouldn’t leave the Refuge immediately. But she could torture them with her words and with her daggers, prolonging their pain as they had prolonged their victims’ suffering.

“Forget the other females.” The leader’s eyes glimmered with madness. “We’re maiming this one, males.” His gaze lowered to her breasts and then her groin. “We’ll slice you into pieces as we take turns fucking you.”

A rumble rolled in the air, so low, so deep, so soft; she might have imagined it.

“You won’t fuck me.” She hid her distaste at that thought under a layer of disdain. “You can’t even get it up in my presence. You’re terrified of me, a tiny female.” She flexed one of her arms. “You’re almost pissing yourself with fear.” She looked at Todt-933, the weakest in the group. “Especially that one.” She pointed a dagger at him.

He lunged toward her, breaking the second-in-command’s grip. Todt-931 flung his spiked club. His throw was too high. He’d underestimated how short she was.

Dita ducked, easily avoiding the club and released both of her daggers. The goal was to maim but solar cycles of training couldn’t be undone. They soared straight and true toward Todt-931’s and Todt-933’s throats.

The blade sank deep into Todt-931’s flesh, delivering a death blow to the leader of the gang. He grabbed at the hilt, gurgling, his eyes wide and he fell over, his arms and legs twitching.

The dagger destined for Todt-933’s throat swerved abruptly to the right, twanging into the domicile behind him. Both of the surviving clones were tossed backward, slammed against that wall.

Dita stared at the dagger. She never missed.

“You-you killed him.” Todt-933, her intended target, was the first to recover.

She withdrew two more daggers.

“No.” Kralj grasped her wrists, stopping her. “Your planet rotations as an assassin are done.”

“Nothing is done.” She struggled, trying to free herself from his grip. “I have two remaining targets. I made a vow to their survivors.”

“You’ll break that vow.” He pulled her tighter to him, the strength in his physique formidable. She’d never sever his hold on her.

But she couldn’t accept his judgment. “Without my honor, I’m nothing.” That, and her skill at killing, was all she had. “I have to—”

“Silence.”

Dita gulped, his dominant tone stealing her words.

The two remaining clones stared at them.

“She-she-she.” Todt-932 stammered.

“Go,” Kralj roared.

The clones scattered, not sparing their fallen leader a second glance.

Dita was left alone with Kralj. He skimmed his sharp fangs along her neck. She trembled. He would kill her now, as he’d promised. He’d end her life.

“Do it quickly.” She lifted her chin, offering him her throat, her body shaking with anticipation.

“I should kill you.” The shadow over Kralj spread, engulfing the entire pathway in a grayness resembling twilight. “I should rip your throat out.”

He turned her to face him. His countenance was as hard as the stone walls surrounding the settlement. Kralj lowered his head, burrowed his face in her neck, and inhaled deeply. She shivered with delight, her nipples tightening, her form arching toward his.

“You left me, little one.” He straightened, meeting her gaze. There was emotion in his eyes, pain in those dark depths. “To do this.” He waved at the dead body with his free hand. “To break one of my rules.”

She blinked. Was he more upset that she left him than that she killed the clone? “I’m an assassin. Killing is all I know. My word is all I have.”

“You’re no longer an assassin. You’re now my slave.” His words shouldn’t excite her yet they did. She’d never been anything other than a killing machine. “From this moment on, you’ll obey my rules. You’ll do what I tell you to do. You’ll go where I go.” He moved her until she was positioned between his arms. “You, your body, your brain, your soul belongs to me, understand?”

“I understand.” That was a lie. She didn’t understand. He wasn’t killing her. He was taking her as his slave. Why? She had no value other than her ability to end lives.

“I understand, master,” he corrected.

“I understand, master.” Her pussy grew wet.

He bumped her forward, leaned over her smaller form, grabbed the clone’s body and lifted it upward. “Remove your dagger.”

“Yes, master.” She obeyed him, wiping the blade clean on her body covering, sliding it back into the sheath. Blood splattered her face, neck, chest, as Kralj tore the clone apart.

He feasted, methodically, emotionlessly. Either his hunger had been sated or his heart wasn’t in the action.

Trapped between him and the corpse, Dita had no choice but to watch him, wondering what he had planned. Her lifespan belonged to him now. Would it be a long lifespan or a short one? What would he do with her?

Kralj ran his bloody hands over her cheeks, her breasts, her stomach, coating her with crimson. She placed her fingers on his.

“No.” He slapped them. Hard. “You haven’t earned the right to touch me.”

“I understand, master.” She was to be his fuck toy.

“This is mine.” He cupped her mons and she jerked. “And I want it. Now. Take off your body covering.”

They were standing in a public pathway. She looked around them.

“Now,” he repeated.

Her spine straightened. Dita stripped, discarding the garment. Kralj chewed on a chunk of the clone’s leg and studied her, his dark eyes not missing anything.

“I’m scarred, master.” She stood in front of him, naked, exposed, cool air rushing over her skin. Anyone turning into the pathway would see those imperfections, marks she normally kept hidden.

“We all have scars.” He recited words she had once told him. “Come here.”

She moved toward him. He painted her red, dragging his bloody hands over her small breasts, weighing them in his palms, flicking her nipples with his thumbs. Bliss and acceptance enveloped her.

He hadn’t rejected her marred form, hadn’t cringed at the pink puckered scar running across her collarbone, left by a blade she couldn’t avoid, the round scar on her right shoulder, the projectile from a past hunt, the indent on her stomach, a gruesome reminder that she wasn’t a normal female.

He caressed, clutched, claimed until she was covered with blood and then he licked the stickiness off her skin, the rasp of his tongue stimulating her to the edge of madness. Dita wanted to touch him, to relay the pleasure she was feeling, but she couldn’t. She hadn’t earned that right. Instead, her fingers clenched and released, clenched and released.

“I worked you hard on the wall, when you sucked my cock.” He walked her backward. “That is nothing compared to how I’ll use you now.”

Her ass smacked against the side of a domicile.

He boosted her upward, wrapped her legs around his waist, opening her to him. “You might not survive this.”

She would. Dita dared not say that.

“Hold on to me,” he commanded. The wind had picked up, a sign his control was compromised.

She grasped the coat-covered breadth of his shoulders, relishing the strength underneath the leather. Kralj sought to scare her with his warning about using her, about working her hard. He had forgotten she was a monster as he was.

She wanted this.

“You’re prey.” He yanked his ass coverings down to his knees, releasing his thick, long cock. “And my beast is in control.”

He lined himself up with her entrance and thrust deep. She screamed, bucking against him, digging her fingernails into his leather-clad shoulders. He pressed forward with his invasion, reshaping her body with his girth, conquering her pussy for his own.

“You’re tight.” His jaw jutted, the skin stretching tight over his scarred face. “Wet, mine.” He sank deeper and deeper into her.

She wiggled, the snugness unbearable.

“Be still.” Kralj closed his mouth over her neck, holding her in place, forcing her to take all of him. The sharp tips of his fangs pushed against her, the pressure delightful.

His base flattened against her feminine folds. There was a pop and his fangs broke skin. Pain flowed down her spine. She squeezed his shaft with her inner walls. He groaned, his lips vibrating against her neck.

Nothing in her lifespan rivalled this moment, Kralj’s cock in her pussy, his fangs in her flesh. Dita hooked her feet over his clenched ass and clung to him.

That grip was required. He drew his hips back, withdrawing to his tip, and slammed back into her, withdrew and slammed back into her, riding her hard. The side of the domicile spanked her ass, an arousing burn radiating from the point of contact. His chest smacked against her breasts.

She panted, clutching him. His head lifted. Warmth streamed down her neck. They stared at each other for a moment, the depth of his need reflecting in his eyes.

Then he fastened his lips to her skin and sucked, the tug and pull of his mouth in sync with the thrust of his hips.

He fucked her like the beast he was, as only a monster could, driving into her again and again, drinking her blood. Wind pushed at his back, whipped his coat around her. The sun was unable to penetrate his shadow.

The domicile behind her rocked. Dita’s brain was fuzzy, the universe spinning around her. The sweat of her body left streaks in the drying blood, on his form and hers.

“Yes, yes, yes.” She couldn’t remain silent, her need for him too strong. “Harder, handsome. Fuck me harder.”

Kralj growled and complied, his eyes flashing, his face contorted with desire. He smelled of heated leather, blood, and her musk, the combination heady.

The porthole in the domicile rattled. The vortex of air swirling around them conveyed larger and larger pieces of debris, his powers impressive, sexy, dangerous.

“Me.” She captured his face between her hands. “Look at me. Give it all to me.”

His gaze zeroed in on hers, his focus on her, only her, the attention heady. The winds eased but his fucking intensified. He held nothing back, pounding into her.

This rutting was to be a punishment. Dita found only joy in it. Her body constricted around his shaft, the friction driving her yearnings skyward. She needed. She needed.

He sank his fangs into her neck again and she screamed, the pain pushing her into the raging storm. Tossed by desire, she clenched him, holding on to him with everything she had.

He howled, the sound of a beast finding release. The porthole shattered. The side of the domicile cracked. Cum shot from Kralj’s tip, splattered against her inner walls, setting off another downpouring of bliss. She screamed until her lungs ached, until she had drained him dry.

Her head tipped back, smacked against the domicile. She winced but didn’t move, her form zapped of energy, her arms and legs weak.

He rocked into her once, twice more and became still, his cock buried deep in her pussy, his mouth at her neck.

Moments passed.

His body stiffened against hers. “I didn’t pull out.” Kralj raised his head and glared at her. “I came inside you.” He was angry, very angry.

Because he thought he might have impregnated her.

That wasn’t possible. Sadness swept over Dita. She wasn’t a normal female. “You can come inside me, handsome. I can’t become pregnant.”

“I’m a monster.” He snarled at her. “Fertility inhibitors might not be effective.”

She didn’t require fertility inhibitors. “I’m also a monster. I—”

Kralj curved his fingers around her neck and squeezed, cutting off her words and the flow of oxygen to her brain. “I have to kill you now, little one.” Dita forced herself to remain still, to not fight this. “I have no choice.”

He had given her a surprising stay of execution, deeming her his slave, but had now changed his mind. That was his prerogative as the leader of the Refuge.

Dita had known this would be the price of breaking his rules. She’d accepted it, wouldn’t leave him with more guilt.

Blackness framed her vision, closing, closing, closing in.

“I can’t do it.” Kralj released her, moving his hands to her shoulders.

She sucked in mouthfuls of air, her lungs aching, her vision hazy. The darkness retreated.

“I can’t kill you.” He said that with a tinge of self-disgust.

Dita blinked at him. Why couldn’t he kill her? He had killed others easily. His display of corpses outside the settlement walls was proof of that.

Did he care for her? Hope unfurled inside her.

“I’ll monitor the situation.” He held her against the side of the domicile. His gaze lowered to her scarred stomach. “I’ll sense another monster. We’ll deal with it then.”

Was he talking about a baby? “Can’t,” she croaked. Fuck. Her throat hurt.

“Silence.” He shook her.

Dita pressed her lips together, complying because she really didn’t want to talk about her past, about her inability to have children.

The Guild had ensured she could never conceive life. She could only take it.

“It was a one-time lapse.” Kralj licked her throat. His nanohumanics bubbled over her, easing her pain. “I won’t lose control again.”

She hoped he would lose control again. She liked it when he let go.

“But I will fuck you.” He said that as though it were a threat. She viewed it as a promise. “You’re mine. I own you.”

Dita didn’t say anything because, at the moment, she was his.

Her two remaining targets would have to be killed. She wouldn’t break her vow to the survivors. But the males would be spooked right now. She’d wait until they’d forgotten about her failed attempt. 

During that delay, she’d spend more time with Kralj, be his slave for a few planet rotations, feel his rough hands on her skin. She trembled with happiness.

“I smell your arousal.” Kralj’s eyes narrowed. “You won’t like being owned.”

His threats didn’t scare her. Nothing was harsher than the Guild’s training program and she’d survived that.

“I’ll leave the body parts here for a shift as a warning to others.” He hauled her over his right shoulder, balanced her there as he fastened his ass covering. “Then I’ll clean up your mess.”

Kralj walked with her along the pathway.

“We forgot my body covering.” Dita waved at the garment. The weapons were rare and she was almost nude, wearing only the blood of her target.

“We forgot my body covering, master,” he corrected.

“We forgot my body covering, master.” If following his rules made him happy, as happy as her grim male could be, she’d comply with each and every one.

“No one would dare to touch it.” He smacked her bare ass, the burn temporarily distracting her from her state of undress. “You’ll remain naked until you can be trusted with garments.”

She frowned. Was he questioning her honor? “I never lied to you.”

“You never spoke the truth either.”

“I’m an assassin.” Her tone was dry. “If I had the habit of sharing my plans with others, I would have been dead solar cycles ago.”

“You’re a slave now.” Kralj cuffed her on the backside again, the reprimand more arousing than hurtful. “Slaves share all of their plans with their masters.”

Shit. Being a slave might be tougher than she thought.

He paraded her through the settlement, his grip on her legs secure. Residents scurried out of their way, fearing the male carrying her. They were more concerned about their own safety than her nudity.

Every so often, Kralj would smack her ass. Sometimes his hand would linger.

The message was thrillingly clear—she was his.

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