Chapter Twenty-Eight – Jeff

Ellie walked up to me and told me she was heading to Gunner’s room to use the restroom. I could feel Rebecca and Crysti staring her down. Bitches.

“I’m going to head over and talk to Gunner. Y’all have some fun.”

Before they could answer me, I walked away. Gunner was giving me that look. The one that said I was walking a thin line and not to fuck things up.

If only he knew.

I slapped him on the back. My buzz was going pretty strong. “So you think my baby sister is having fun at her first college party?”

He shook his head. “Jeff, man, what’s going on with you tonight? You never get wasted like this. You’re leaving me totally responsible for watching your sister and her friends.”

“It looks like Jeff’s little sister’s friends are taking pretty good care of themselves,” Rebecca spat out with a fake laugh.

My breath caught in my throat as Ari made her way over to us. She was out of breath from dancing. Gunner reached into the cooler and handed her a beer.

“Whew! I haven’t danced that much in forever! Where’s Ellie? She needs to get her ass out there and dance with us.” Ari took a drink of the beer but avoided my stare.

Rebecca wrapped her arms around me, and that’s when Ari decided to look. Her heated gaze traveled up and down Rebecca and landed on her arms wrapped around my waist.

“Who’s your friend, dickwad?” Ari asked.

Fucking hell, why did she have to look so damn beautiful? The sheen of sweat covering her body had my own aching to be inside of her. To claim her as mine and make sure every single one of these bastards knew it.

But she wasn’t mine. She could never be.

I cleared my throat. “Rebecca, this is Ellie’s best friend, Squirt. Squirt, this is Rebecca, a friend of mine.” I stressed friend, and I had no idea why. That was a lie. I needed Ari to walk away, and if she thought Rebecca was something more, like a hookup, she wouldn’t want to be around us. The heat from her body was too close to me, confusing me and making my head spin. Ari seemed to have stood a little taller, her eyes locked on mine.

When she finally broke the stare, she turned to Rebecca. “Hello, Jeff’s friend Rebecca. The name is Ari; nice to meet you.”

Ari reached for Rebecca’s hand to shake it, and being the bitch she was, Rebecca looked at it and laughed.

I forced myself to keep smiling, hoping that would make Ari leave, but it didn’t.

Instead, she glanced back out to the dance floor. I hated the idea that she was going to go back out there and rub up against some guy.

When Ari turned back and looked at me, her eyes were begging me for a truce. She chewed on her lip and was about to say something to me. She was going to ask me to dance. I knew it by the look in her eyes. My entire body tensed, and panic set in. If she asked me to dance, I would say yes, and once she was in my arms, I wouldn’t want to let go of her.

I leaned in, like I was about to whisper something to her, but I didn’t whisper it. I said it loud and clear for everyone standing there to hear. “Better be careful dancing like that out there, Squirt. You’re playing with the big boys now. You might lose your V card if you keep dancing like that, honey.”

The moment the words were out, I felt like I was going to throw up. A sickness I’d never felt before settled into the pit of my stomach, and I wanted to throw up.

You motherfucking asshole. God, I hated myself right now. More than I ever had in my entire life. I’d just hurt the only woman I’d ever cared about, and the way she was looking at me felt like a knife in my heart.

I barely registered Rebecca and Crysti laughing. The only thing I could see were the tears slowly forming in her beautiful eyes.

Ari looked at the two bitches and then back to me. Her hurt morphed to anger, and Gunner walked between us as he told the two bitches to knock it off or leave.

I forced the corners of my mouth to rise a little more. Please walk away, Ari. Please just go.

Her shoulders squared off, and she shook her head while she flashed me a smirk. “Fuck you, Jeff. It’s not the first time I’ve played with big boys, and it certainly won’t be the last.”

All the air in my lungs came out in one whoosh. Her comment was meant to hurt me like I had hurt her . . . and it fucking did. The idea that Ari might have already lost her virginity was something I didn’t want to think about. She knew it too by my expression at her comment.

Ari walked over to Jack, the DJ, and asked him to play a song.

Gunner asked to talk to me alone, dismissing Rebecca and her friends.

“Sure, I’ll be inside, baby.” Rebecca reached up and kissed me on the cheek.

I couldn’t take any more. The only thing I could do was close my eyes and pretend none of that shit had just happened.

“Jeff, what the fuck is your problem? Why would you embarrass Ari like that?”

Gunner’s hands pushed through his hair like he was pissed. It was a habit he had when he was angry or nervous.

“Holy shit, dude, that was a real douchebag move.”

Shrugging, I took a drink of my beer. I needed to feel numb. I didn’t want to feel a damn thing.

A Britney Spears song started playing right as Ellie walked up.

“What in the hell?” she asked, staring at the dance floor. My eyes followed Ellie’s, and my mouth hit the ground.

Ari was dancing with Josh. Not just dancing—fucking grinding all over him. People started to gather around them, whooping and hollering. She leaned back in to Josh, her hand lacing into his hair, pulling his face down closer to her. When she bit in to her lip, I nearly came undone.

“Gunner, do you know why Ari is dancing like she’s starring in the next Dirty Dancing movie?” Ellie asked over the music.

Gunner didn’t utter a word. I knew he was waiting for me to confess the dirty little thing I had done to my sister’s best friend. I couldn’t form a sentence right now if I wanted to. What in the fuck was Ari doing? Amanda and Heather joined in, and Josh looked like he was on cloud nine. I was going to fucking kill him tomorrow. Maybe I’d invite him into the ring and go a few rounds with him. I was positive his cock was rubbing up against what should be mine.

The song changed to something slower, and Gunner led Ellie to the dance floor.

Josh had Ari in his arms as they slowly danced.

“Come on, handsome. Let’s dance.” Rebecca dragged me out to where everyone was dancing. Her lips pressed to mine. I didn’t even kiss her back. I was numb. I couldn’t kiss her back even if I wanted to. Not when I saw Ari reach up and wipe a single tear from her cheek.

I fucking hated myself. I didn’t deserve to have someone like Ari. She deserved someone who would cherish her. Desire to make her his one and only.

The only thing I knew how to do was hurt her.

That I was good at.

I could only take so much. And Ari dancing with Josh to the song “Shut Up” nearly had me losing my shit. Rebecca did her best to keep my attention on her, and I knew it wasn’t lost on her that I had been watching every single move Ari made damn near all night.

Lifting the beer to my lips, I nearly spilled it all I was getting so drunk.

Rebecca laughed. “You’re pretty wasted. Do you think that was such a wise thing to do with this being your sister’s first college party?”

With a laugh, I looked at Rebecca. “Was that you being thoughtful, Rebecca? I didn’t think you had it in you.”

She grinned. “I’m not a heartless bitch. It’s your sister, and most of these guys here tonight have been eye fucking the hell of her and her little friends. Poor Gunner’s been having to play tough cop while you’re being bad cop.”

I smiled and looked past her. Ari was laughing at something some guy was saying to her. When he leaned down and whispered something into her ear, her smile grew bigger.

Still watching Ari flirt with the jackass, I said, “You haven’t even seen bad yet, Rebecca.”

Her hand brushed against my dick. “Then show me, Jeff.”

Grabbing her hand, I pulled her through the house and into my bedroom.

Rebecca started to pull her shirt over her head, but I stopped her. “Don’t bother getting undressed. This is going to be fast. Turn around and put your hands on the footboard.”

She did what I said. After I slipped the condom on, I closed my eyes and saw Ari. My sweet, beautiful Ari.

I was sweating by the time I had finished fucking Rebecca. I was also so numb I had to wonder if I was still alive. I felt nothing. Nothing but guilt and self-loathing.

“That was fun,” she said as I pulled my beer-soaked T-shirt off. Reaching into my drawer, I pulled another shirt out.

The second I opened my bedroom door, Rebecca started laughing loudly as I slipped the new T-shirt over my head.

What in the fuck?

That’s when I saw Ellie and Ari. Ellie looked devastated. She spun back and looked at Gunner.

“It’s time to go, Crysti, and take your tramp friend Rebecca with you,” Gunner said with anger in his voice.

He led Crysti through the living room and to the front door.

“Hey! Take your hands off me, you dick!” Crysti shouted.

“Get out now!” Gunner shouted.

Everyone started piling toward the door since Gunner was making it seem like the party was officially coming to an end. My eyes caught the sight of Ari crying, and it felt like someone had punched me in the gut. I deserved it. Maybe I should ask Josh or Brad to throw a few punches at me. Let them land and give me what I deserved. With a defeated sigh, I quickly headed outside and found myself another beer.