CHAPTER EIGHT

NATALIE

I never thought of myself as a kid person. 

But as Ari excitedly chatted my ear off all afternoon about her dolls, school, friends, and karate class, I quickly felt like I made a new friend. She was smart, polite, and clearly inherited her good looks from her father with how cute she was. Innocent fun like playing with dolls and making up stories felt so unreal. 

Ari reminded me just how fun and simple life could be. 

I felt a little bad for Sol, who seemed like a bit of a third wheel. He listened quietly as Ari talked to me excitedly, adding a few words here and there but mostly silently observing with an unreadable expression. 

He didn’t seem bothered by his daughter talking to me so much, so I happily listened to Ari and asked her questions that I hoped were appropriate. 

“I used my karate on a boy at school,” she said proudly, digging into her bowl of pasta primavera. Across the table, Sol sounded like he choked on his beer while laughing. 

“Oh wow!” I said with my eyes wide, looking for any kind of signal from Sol, but he merely shrugged. “Was he um, bothering you?” 

“He kept making fun of me because I don’t have a mommy.” 

“Oh…” 

A heavy silence fell over the table. Sol’s jaw bulged with tension across the table when I looked at him helplessly. But he seemed just at a loss for what to say as I was. 

“Hey, you know what? That’s okay.” I patted Ari’s arm. “I don’t have a mommy either.”

“You don’t?” Her large, amber eyes that mirrored Sol’s looked up at me. 

“Nope. I grew up with just a daddy like you. It was hard but everything turned out okay.” I bit the inside of my cheek, feeling Sol’s eyes burn through me but suddenly unable to look at him. Thinking of my own father sent a cold, painful knife slicing through my abdomen. Was he still up home in Brownsville? Was he still looking for me or had he given up? Was there ever a search for me? I missed out on so much of the world.

“You know I’d give you a mommy if I could, baby,” Sol said quietly, ruffling up Ari’s hair. 

I could see in their interactions how much he adored her. It was touching seeing this muscle-bound tattooed man looking at her with such affection and speaking so gently. 

At the same time, questions arose in my mind that I had no business asking. Sol and Ari’s biological mother clearly weren’t together and it looked like Ari lived here full-time. Did her mom pass away like mine? 

I shoved more pasta in my mouth and lowered my eyes away from the tender father-daughter moment. Their family dynamic was none of my business. As a temporary visitor, it would be best for me to not ask questions or get involved in their family affairs.

“Can Natalie be my mommy?” Ari suddenly blurted.

“No!” 

Sol and I shouted the word at the same time and let out synchronized, nervous laughter. Then we started laughing because we mirrored each other perfectly while Ari looked back and forth between us in confusion.

Our eye contact lingered across the table as we laughed and I felt my face heat up from more than just embarrassment. 

“Natalie’s just staying for a little bit, baby,” Sol explained when he caught his breath. “She has her own home and family to go to.” 

Not exactly. But we shouldn’t get the kid’s hopes up.

“Anyway, it’s almost your bedtime.” Sol noisily scraped his chair back, apparently just as eager as I was to get away from this table and conversation.

“No! Natalie and me are playing!” Ari shrieked. “You promised!” 

“Fine,” Sol said with an eye roll. 

After another hour of playing Detective Barbie with her faithful clue-sniffing dog, Sparky, Sol brought down the bedtime hammer. Ari’s eyes were already drooping with sleepiness and I left the room to let Sol put her to bed. 

"Goodnight, Natalie!" Ari called from her princess bed over Sol's shoulder. 

"Goodnight, Ari!" I replied as I reached the bottom of the stairs. 

By the time I grabbed a glass of water from the kitchen and settled into the couch, Sol was gently closing her bedroom door and returning downstairs to the land of adults. 

"She really likes you."

His tone was cool and neutral, neither positive or negative, just a simple observation as he grabbed a beer from the fridge and joined me on the couch. He sat on the opposite end from me, putting plenty of distance between us. 

"I really like her too," I said, not bothering to hide the affection in my voice. I never always got along with kids but I seemed to genuinely click with her. With a sip of water and a nervous gulp, I added, "She's a great girl. You've obviously raised her well." 

Sol's lips curled in that cocky smirk that was quickly becoming familiar to me. 

"Thanks." He took a long pull from his beer and leaned his head against the back of the couch as he let out a long sigh. "It still feels like I don't know what I'm doing sometimes. Like I wish I  understood what she needs but doesn’t tell me. I just hope I don't fuck her up."

As he drank more from his beer, a strange look crossed his face like he wasn't sure why he was telling me this. 

I squirmed in my seat as I tried to figure out broaching the next topic. As much as I liked talking about Ari, there were other young women on my mind. 

"What do you plan to do about Antigua?" I asked, figuring blunt was the best way to go about it. "And when?" 

His eyebrows raised slightly in response to my questions.

"I have some connections that can poke around his nest," he answered vaguely. "Even some cop and detective friends who can get me information. Whenever I need some serious insider info, I'll let you know." 

That answer didn't satisfy me worth a damn. I set my water down on the coffee table, trying to keep calm. 

"Sol, there's more girls like me down there," I said. "At least a dozen and they're on limited time. I was extremely lucky but they're going to need serious help and fast. If cops go poking around, they're just going to get hidden away in even worse conditions." 

"Listen, Natalie." Sol's tone turned patronizing as he sat up and rested his forearms on his thighs. His smug posture just made me even angrier. 

"I'm retaliating on Antigua because he went back on an agreement we made. Now, I'm not a monster but I am still a criminal. I have a reputation and a business to maintain. I'm sorry but I'm not some righteous human rights crusader trying to save a bunch of lives. If we rescue some girls in the process, great. But that is not my number one priority right now."

What the hell?

Clearly, I read him all wrong. This guy didn’t care about anyone but his own interests. His generosity toward me was nothing but a sham. 

His words shocked, numbed and infuriated me. I couldn't believe he was sitting right here in front of me, living proof of what was happening, and telling me it wasn't a big priority. 

"Are you even listening to yourself?" I demanded. "If it doesn't matter to you, then why didn't you shoot me when you had the chance? Why did you bring me here and let your daughter meet me? What's with all this?" I tugged at the neck of the sweater I wore, which suddenly felt entirely too hot. 

"Keep your voice down," Sol said in a low, warning tone. I said nothing more but my teeth chattered with how angrily I shook.

“Look, you seem like a nice girl that got caught up in the wrong business somehow. So let me explain it to you.” Sol leaned forward toward me with his eyes narrowed. 

“Every day I send drugs and guns to eager customers who pay top dollar and at the same time, I’m a father to that little girl.” He angrily stabbed a finger pointing up to Ari’s room. “I’m not a good, wholesome man but I’m trying my damnedest to make a better life for her. I can still set a good example of how to treat people who need help. I can’t even begin to tell you how lucky you are that you ran into me and not someone else.” 

“I know that,” I said. “And I’m grateful to you. But--”

“You want to know what matters to me?” Sol cut me off, leaning so far forward I could feel his breath on my lips. “Keeping my daughter safe. Securing a good future for her. Making sure she never gets sucked into the world that you and I have seen firsthand.” 

“In other words,” I said coolly. “Ensuring she never ends up as worthless, damaged goods like me.” 

Sol recoiled as if I slapped him. Good. I hoped those words stung him right where it hurt. 

“That’s not what I said.” His voice was thick, his eyes softened their aggressive gaze. 

“It’s what you meant.” 

“Don’t put words in my mouth, Natalie,” he growled. It would have been sexy if I wasn’t so pissed off at him. 

“Fine, Sol,” I said, rising from the couch, eager to be as far away from him as I could. “But in case you forgot, those girls are someone’s daughters, too.”

I ascended the stairs without another word to my room and quietly closed the door behind me. Sinking down into the memory foam mattress, my heart sank as well. Leah’s face floated through my mind and my heart ached as I wondered how she was holding up. I already missed her desperately. Did I really have no choice but to do nothing while Sol took his sweet time to maybe rescue a few girls?

How could he be such a devoted father to his daughter, and yet so callous?  

I flipped over almost violently on the mattress and realized my thighs were squeezing together. My core pulsed with sensitivity and heat, pleasure that felt so foreign.

He had leaned in so close to me I could have kissed him. I watched his full lips move and I thought about it. 

The air practically sparked as we argued. My trusty knife couldn’t cut through how thick the tension was. At first, I thought it could have been from my anger. I saw red when he told me those girls weren’t a high priority to him.  

But as I rubbed my thighs together, sending a hand down between my legs to caress that firm little nub, I wondered if it could have been something else.