That vise that was gripping my chest, it disappeared the minute I pulled her to me at the airport. I still hurt for her and the loss she’s dealing with for her grandfather, but the pain in my chest has gone.
I offer to drive from the airport, but she declines, so I take shotgun. Stacy volunteers to sit in the third row because she shorter and Cole joins her. He acts like he’s taking one for the team, for the greater good and all that, but I see the way her looks at her. Tristan and Gavin load up in the backseat and we’re on the road.
Reaching over, I rest my hand on her thigh. I have to. It’s not something I can control. Logan quickly glances over and gives me a bright smile as she laces her fingers through mine.
“So where are we headed first, Log?” Stacy yells up to her. “You taking me to see my future husband?” she jokes.
“Future husband?” Cole repeats.
“Yeah, Jase, Logan’s little bother, although there’s not really anything little about him,” Stacy explains.
“She loves to mess with Jase. I think she sort of scares him,” Logan says. “I thought I would take you all to your hotel first and let you get settled. I promised Jase I would bring everyone by to meet him. I figured better today than tomorrow night at the visitation.” She glances over at me. “Where are you all staying?”
“Ask Tristan, he booked the rooms,” I tell her.
I can see the confusion cross her face.
“It’s the Holiday Inn that’s beside the funeral home. I thought that would be the easiest,” Stacy says.
“Yeah, I kind of consulted Stacy for where to stay. I wasn’t sure exactly where in Cincinnati we were going,” Tristan admits.
“You all have no idea what it means to me to have you here. Thank you so much.” She takes a big breath, trying to get her emotions under control.
I give her hand a gentle squeeze as Tristan leans forward and places his hand on her shoulder. “You’re family, Logan. We take care of our family.”
He says it with so much conviction that you know he feels it. Calm settles over me. These guys are my family, and they’ve accepted her as a part of my life, as a part of us.
When we reach the hotel, everyone piles out of the Tahoe. “Get settled and we can head to my parents’ place in an hour or so. We have a ton of food that Mom will be thrilled y’all are going to help eat,” Logan tells us.
“Tristan pre-paid for the rooms and registered them under my name. I’ll go get us all checked in and we can head straight up to the rooms,” Stacy explains.
Not able to stay away from her, I step up behind Logan. I don’t touch her. I’m not sure if she wants me to. I don’t want to push her or pressure her. She’s going through a lot, but I just need to be as close to her as possible. Leaning over her shoulder, I place my lips next to her ear and whisper, “I missed you, Logan.”
Looking over her shoulder at me, her eyes sparkle when she says, “I missed you too.” Surprising me, she reaches back and laces her fingers through mine.
That helps trample some of the anxiety I’m feeling. She said she has a lot to say, and I’m man enough to admit I’m scared as hell she’s going to quit and tell me to stay the hell away from her. She misses me, but she also misses her family.
“Stacy just sent a text. She’s at the side entrance waiting for us,” Tristan says.
“Why is she texting you?” I hear Cole grumble. He’s more interested than what he’s telling us. I look forward to seeing how this plays out.
Logan pulls me toward the side of the building and I let her. I would follow her anywhere. I just need to know what I need to do to get her to understand that.
Stacy holds the door for each of us and passes out room keys. I hear Cole smart off about how Gavin’s room is closer to her as he stalks off down the hall. The rest of them follow, which leaves Logan and me alone.
“I’d like to come up and talk to you, if that’s okay? I know you just got in and—”
I place my finger over her lips, cutting her off. “I’m never going to pass up the chance to spend time with you,” I tell her. Those chocolate eyes light up at my admission, but I can see she’s worried. I take the lead, guiding us to my room so we can talk.
Sliding the card in the door, I step back and motion for Logan to go in ahead of me. She walks straight to the bed and sits down. I drop my bag on the floor beside the dresser and take a seat beside her.
Reaching over, she grabs my hand and laces it with hers, resting them on her lap. “Kacen, I’m so sorry for how I acted yesterday,” she starts.
I stay quiet, letting her work through whatever it is she has to say. I can only hope that when she’s done, I’ll still be a part of her life.
“I was upset and my heart was aching. I still feel the guilt of not being here sooner, that I didn’t get to see him before he died. Gran assured me that he loved me and could not have been happier for me and the life I’m living in Nashville. She said that just because you don’t live close to your family doesn’t mean they don’t know you love them.” She pauses to look at me with tears in her eyes. “She enlightened me a little on my way of thinking.”
A lone tear slides down her cheek, so I trace it away with my thumb.
“I was fighting with myself about loving my new life and feeling guilty for not being involved in my old one. Gran easily pointed out that it’s all the same. That you have to do what makes your heart happy and make sure that those you love, near or far, know how you feel. Just live each day as if it could be your last.”
“Logan—”
“Please,” she cuts me off, “let me get this out.” She stands from the bed and turns to step in between my legs. Her small hands cradle my face. Instinctively, I place my hands on her waist and pull her as close as I can get her.
“I love you, Kacen. I’ve fought this battle inside myself between how I thought I was going to live my life going forward and my heart, which wanted you the minute I laid eyes on you. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you yesterday. I wanted to, and as soon as I pulled out of the drive, I was filled with regret, afraid I had lost you, but too jumbled with emotions to be able to sort through it all. Spending time with Gran today helped.”
I don’t give her time to say anything else. I pull her lips to mine. She moans in the back of her throat as I slip my tongue past her lips. She loves me. I don’t want to stop kissing her, but fuck do I need her to say it again. Reluctantly, I pull my lips from hers and pull her into my lap. I nuzzle my face into her neck and breathe her in.
Just as I’m about to ask her to say it again, she does. “I love you, Kacen. I want this, whatever this is between us. I want to see where it leads us. I don’t want to fight my heart anymore.” Her voice trails off.
She fucking loves me!
“This,” I say, my lips next to her ear, “is forever.” I trail kisses down her neck just as a knock sounds at the door.
“Go away,” I grumble. This causes Logan to giggle.
“Kacen, we’re going to my parents,’ remember?” she asks. Her face goes serious. “Wait, you’re meeting my family. If you’re not ready for that, if we’re not there yet, I get it. We can pretend—”
I place my hand over her mouth. “There will be no pretending. You’re mine. You own me, Logan. I want to meet your family. Meet the people who are important to you. I’m in this, babe. You and me,” I tell her.
Another loud knock, this time with Stacy yelling, “Let’s get this show on the road. My future hubby awaits.”
“Let’s do this,” I say, lifting her from my lap. I kiss her deeply before placing her feet back on the floor.
I place my arm around her waist, grab my room key, and off we go to meet the parents.