“Men suck” I held my glass up in front of me, and Stella and Leo followed suit, raising their glasses and joining in. My friends didn’t suck. When I texted Stella the details from my night, she came and got me, we picked up Leo, and headed to her favorite hangout, Sixes. At first, I tried to talk her into another bar, but she was insistent. Apparently, it was the only place worth hanging out and we wouldn’t have to deal with tourists. At least I didn’t have to worry about running into Kayson since he was working, emergency paperwork if that was the real excuse.

“Enjoy the night. Don’t let date ditching ruin the evening,” Stella’s smile was evil. I shook my head, knowing exactly how she thought I shouldn’t let him ruin my night.

As if to punctuate her hidden meaning, she waved over a server and ordered three rounds of shots—blow jobs, panty droppers, and screaming orgasms.

Leo leaned forward to grab my attention and raised her eyebrows. “You know why I ride a Harley?”

I shook my head.

“Cause using a vibrator in public is frowned upon. You don’t have to go home with a guy to have a good time.”

I lost it and was thankful I hadn’t just taken a sip of my drink.

When I finally got myself under control, I blurted, “I’ve never had drunk sex.”

“We’ll see if we can change that for you tonight,” Stella offered. “I’m sure we can find someone.”

“Well, unless Bob counts.”

They laughed because, like most women, they were in on the joke. Guys may not know Bob, but women did. He was our insta-date, never broke his word, and always gave an orgasm. Our beloved, Battery Operated Boyfriend.

The server came back, setting all the shots in the middle of the table. Stella and Leo stood, so I followed their lead. I’d done enough shots but where I came from shots were whiskey, tequila, or vodka. I grew up in a dry county, we drove thirty minutes to cross the county line to buy booze at the Sip-N-Sak.

“Blow job,” Stella and Leo shouted.

“Put your hands behind your back. You can only use your mouth. You have to swallow the entire shot,” Stella instructed. “Ready, ladies?”

“Is this how you give a real blow job?” I wanted to know having never given one.

“What?” Leo’s eyes narrowed on me, incredulous.

“Shit,” some guy from across the bar said as he spewed his beer.

“You don’t know?” Stella shook her head in disbelief.

“Never gave one.” I’d only dated two guys, one when I was seventeen and the other was Brandon, who was dipping his wick in one too many places. I wasn’t putting my mouth down there.

With a hundred assurances from Stella that this type tasted better, but the reward wasn’t as great. She went first then slammed the empty shot glass onto the bar. I examined the mocha-colored drink in front of me with whipped cream piled on top before mimicking her movements. Holding my left wrist with my right hand behind my back, I leaned over opening my mouth wide, and wrapping my lips tightly around the rim of the glass. I used my teeth to hold it in place and then tossed my head back and swallowed the shot in one big gulp before taking the glass out of my mouth and setting it back on the bar.

“Did I do it right?”

“Now, that is how you swallow a mother-fucking blow job.” Stella slammed her glass down and picked up the next.

“Do we do this one the same way?” I sniffed the next shot glass with its pinkish color.

“Nah,” Leo assured me.

I downed the drink. “Very berry.” It was a bit strange after the thick consistency of the first shot, and I puckered my lips. My stomach was already getting warm and my nose had the telltale tingles of a buzz.

“I’m gonna pass on the third,” I announced. “Someone should be sober enough to drive.”

I had been completely sober when I was attacked, and just the thought of being attacked when I wasn’t in control of all my faculties set my nerves on edge. Since Stella showed no sign of slowing down, I had to drive or call a taxi.

“No. Piper’s coming. She’s taking us all home,” Stella said.

The thought of Piper with a gun ensuring that I got home safe had me reaching for the final shot. Once all three shots started to work their magic, I no longer cared about being left in the restaurant, and I needed no coaxing to take over the dance floor.

I fist pumped the air, shouting, “Stronger! Stronger!” I bounced to the beat of the music, twirling, swinging to the rhythm.

“We need a name!” I hollered.

“For what?” Leo asked as she continued jumping to Kelly Clarkson.

“Our group. Gang.” I pointed at Stella as I said the last word.

“It has to be sexy like us,” Stella purred. “Show our feminine wiles.”

“Fuck that, it needs to have something to do with motorcycles.” Leo dismissed Stella’s suggestion.

Hmm, sexy bikes. “Maybe we could put it together, like Steel Magnolias?”

“I’m Ouiser,” Stella shouted. “That bitch was funny.

“Oh, Ouiser, I love you more than I do my luggage.” Cracking up over that line from the movie, I had to try to get them to refocus. “We aren’t using Steel Magnolias. It’s just an idea starter. C’mon, think.”

The music changed, and Charlie Puth sang fuck-me music. We swayed, okay, to be honest, we had no choice. The alcohol had taken effect, and we were solidly into too drunk to stand straight. Still, we did our best to be sexy and maintain our balance.

“Throttle. Iron. Engine. Motor,” Leo spouted off words associated with bikes but sounded as if she were suffering Tourette’s.

The gleam in Stella’s eyes turned wicked. “Throttle Cats.”

“Isn’t there a cartoon with that name?” I asked, turning to her.

“That’s Thunder Cats. Ours is Throttle Cats, for getting the pussy going.”

My laugh bubbled up and wouldn’t stop. I reached for Stella but made her wobble, which had her reaching for Leo, and the three of us tumbled to the floor. If I were sober, I would have been mortified to be spread out in the middle of everyone, giggling.

“Pussy Cats!” I yelled, pretending to hold a glass and cheer.

“No, Throttle Cats.”

“I think we should use Orchids,” I told them, my mind shifting back to magnolias during my few seconds of false sobriety.

“What the fuck does that have to do with pussy or bikes?” Stella asked.

“They’re the flower of women. Aphrodite’s flower. They mean sexual and beauty. They’re Greek.”

“Greek?” Stella turned her head to me and squinted, probably trying to bring me into focus. “Ah, shit, you liked him. Didn’t you? Be honest, I hate the way things turned out.”

“No. Men suck. I told you that already.”

They did suck. I was sure of it. He’d ditched, but I didn’t know why, which I think bothered me more than him actually leaving. Lord knew that Brandon fit every stereotypical jerk profile there was, but I didn’t get that feeling from Kayson. He had this wholesome, boy-next-door vibe. Knowing that he was just like my ex made it hard to remember how fantastic his lips felt or how badly I wanted to know what was under his clothing. It didn’t add up.

“Okay, ladies,” a familiar man said as he helped to lift us up. “You have caused quite the show. How much have you had to drink?”

“You’ve got good hands, has anyone ever told you that you’ve got good hands?” I looked at him. I knew him but couldn’t place him, he was muscular, square jawed, and tanned. He looked like he rode a motorcycle all day in the wind with the sun shining on his face. I tried to picture what his face would like against a pillow, my pillow, in my bed.

“I want more blow jobs.” I sounded petulant.

“Don’t we both. But we don’t always get what we want, do we?” he asked.

Reaching up, I patted his cheek. “You look like Jax from Sons of Anarchy. I could so tap Charlie Hunnam.”

“Me, too,” Leo added. “I could tap Charlie Hunnam. You know who else I could tap?”

“I don’t like Charlie Hunnam. But I could tap—”

“I’ve never given a blow job, you could be my first.” I met his eyes and tried on a sexy smile. This was what Stella wanted me to do, right? I swiped at my head to clear away the buzzing sound or was that a growling sound?

“Enough. I don’t want to hear this.” He was glaring at Stella. “I’m Stella’s brother, I don’t ever . . . ever need to know about who she would or wouldn’t ‘tap’. I don’t want to be your first blow job.” When he turned to me, there was kindness in his eyes but frustration. “I’m Carter.”

“Fuck. Fuck. Shoot. Poop.” Seriously? This guy was Stella’s brother? Mortification flooded me as soon as his features started to place themselves together. Yup. I’d met him before.

“Normally, people don’t go from trash talk to second-grade vocabulary, but okay. I think it’s time you ladies get some water and food.”

“You got a girlfriend?” He probably did, but you didn’t know unless you asked. I looked over at Stella to see if she minded me hitting on her brother.

“Shhh. Carter doesn’t date girls,” Stella whispered at a drunken decibel, which meant she screamed it so the whole bar could hear.

“Ahhh, now I understand why you turned down the blow job, you’re gay.”

“Fuck no. Kayson’s one of my fucking best friends.” In his ire Carter released his hold on me, and without the extra support, I stumbled and fell backward.

Before I hit the ground, large hands wrapped around my waist, and a deep voice whispered, “Careful, sweet, I’ve got you.”

I looked over my shoulder and into velvety chocolate eyes, which were full of concern and passion. Drunken anger and hurt were pushed to the surface by life-long insecurities, and I straightened.

“Get your hands off me. Men suck. You aren’t going to ruin our fun.” Including Leo and Stella in my statement as I swatted his hands away from me made me feel better.

“That’s right, asshat,” Leo said, and we cracked up as if that was the funniest word in the entire world.

“Blow jobs!” Stella, Leo, and I shouted in unison, though I was pretty sure I shouldn’t drink another drop . . . ever.

“If you hand over your keys, I’ll keep the drinks coming.”

“Deal!” Stella nodded.

“To the bar!” I ordered in a battle cry.

Stella, Leo, and I returned to our seats with help from Kayson and Carter, and we waved our server over. After ordering a few more rounds, well, pretty much one of everything on the bar menu, I was set for a forget-about-the-clusterfuck-that-was-my-night kind of night.

Food arrived at our table, and I looked over my shoulder to see Kayson making the universal sign for eating by acting as if he was shoveling something into his mouth.

“Where’d the food come from?” I wasn’t sure whether Stella or Leo asked that because the words were jumbled and I didn’t see anyone’s mouth move.

Throwing my head on the table, “Is it bad that I still want him to do sexy things with me, really, really sexy things, all night long?”

“You all are shitfaced, what are we drinking to, and who are you talking about, Ariel?” Piper asked as she slid into the seat across from me.

“We know.”

“Motherfuckers.”

“Wanting to do sexy things with Kayson.”

Leo, Stella, and I spoke at the same time, but it was my declaration that had everyone turning to stare.

“Men?” Piper asked.

Turning my head toward Piper. “You can’t live with them and you can’t shoot them.”

“Well, you can’t, I can if there’s probable cause.” She snagged a potato skin from the plate in front of us.

“Maybe I should become a deputy.” But I didn’t want to shoot men. I just wanted them to stop being assholes.

Leo gave Piper the Cliff-notes version of my night and then moved the conversation to safer water. “We’re trying to come up with a name for our group. I suggested something to do with motorcycles and Ariel said Orchids.”

“I was pulling for Throttle Cats, but these two”—Stella gestured drunkenly to Leo and me—“shot me down.”

“Got it. Motorcycles. No cats,” Piper replied.

We probably looked like a hot mess to her since she was the only sober person at the table.

“Drink up. You got some catching up to do. Provided you think men suck. Tonight is a bashing men, they all suck kind of night.” I waved my finger in her face.

“Yeah. Men suck.” Piper spread out three shot glasses, but she held firm with water. “But DUIs suck worse.”

We cheered and then downed the blow job shots, sans hands, and sat back down.

“Would you forgive him if you knew he was actually at the station filling out paperwork? I got off shift an hour ago and he was in the captain’s office getting chewed out.”

I stared at my empty shot glass, her words bouncing around in my brain and trying to override my anger. “No. It wouldn’t make me forgive him.”

Piper was turned to face the other patrons. “That’s a shame. He’s been watching you since I got here.”

“Good. Let him agonize.” I meant every word of that. Okay. Not every word, but most of them. Crap. Okay. I meant like one of them. Okay, okay. I meant the period at the end. I glanced over at him, and he was watching me with an almost sad puppy-dog look in his eyes. I should give him a chance.

Wait a minute, I had, and he blew it. Somewhere in the back of my drunken mind, I knew it wasn’t reasonable for me to demand he risk his job—or whatever case he needed to fill out paperwork for—for someone he hardly knew, but I shut that thought down. It was the same voice that told me to give Brandon the benefit of the doubt. Though, Brandon didn’t have a coworker vouching for him . . .

“Got it,” Piper said, slamming her hands on the table. “We could name our group Iron Orchids.”

As easy as that, our group had a name. By one o’clock in the morning, Leo, Stella, and I were in no condition to drive let alone walk unaccompanied.

“I’ll take Ariel,” Kayson said to the others.

I should have turned him down. And if he had said that four shots ago, I would have. Instead, I stumbled and turned to the girls. “See you Iron Orchids later.”

Kayson escorted me from the bar, and I was so hyper focused on the way his body moved, I hardly thought to care that I was about to be in his truck. There was something about alcohol that made me horny. I couldn’t explain it. It was like, once the buzz wore off in my head, it settled down in my girly parts. He opened his truck door and helped me in.

I rested my head against his truck window while Kayson drove.

“Will you ever forgive me?”

“You don’t get it. You have no idea what it’s like to know.” The flash of yellow and white stripes from the road as Kayson drove made my head spin. I fumbled with the air conditioner until the vents were blowing on my face. “It’s not cool when you know what he’s doing but there’s nothing you can fucking do about it. I mean, you’re powerless. So fucking powerless.” I stopped talking as Kayson’s warm hand found mine.

“Sweet, you have more power than you’ll ever know, I just wished I had a clue what the fuck you were talking about.”

When we arrived at my apartment, he didn’t ask if he could come in, he just did.

“Go get changed, and I will grab you some water and Advil.”

I nodded and headed down the hallway to my bedroom. I pulled on my favorite T-shirt and crawled into bed.

“Here you go.” Kayson sat on the side of my bed and handed me the water and two Advil.

I took them, and he set two more on my nightstand.

“Keep drinking the water, okay?”

I nodded, but I was already halfway passed out.

“I’ll lock up. You lie down.” He tucked the covers around me. “Rest,” he whispered.

I felt the wisp and heat from his breath next to my ear and then it was gone.

I awoke some time in the middle of the night with what felt like a mouth full of cotton, I drank the entire bottle of water, stumbled to the sink in my bathroom to refill it, and took the two remaining Advil on my nightstand. When I curled back in bed, memories of Kayson’s warm breath tickling my neck lulled me back to sleep.

When next I woke, I was still thinking about the feel of Kayson’s breath on my neck, only instead of lulling me back to sleep, it was doing much more interesting things to me. Without opening my eyes—no need to break a perfectly good fantasy—I opened the drawer of my nightstand and pulled out my coveted Womanizer, the best fucking vibrator in the entire world. That gorgeous man, his sexy olive skin, and steamy, sultry dark eyes had me all kinds of twisted as I thought about all the other places his warm breath could go.

Kayson’s big hands spreading my thighs as he brought his head down between my legs. His velvety brown eyes with their laugh lines smiling at me before he went in to feast. What would his hair feel like as I ran my fingers through it, gripping his head to hold him in that perfect spot?

I wiggled out of my panties and pressed the rhinestone button to turn Bob on and . . . nothing.

Fuck.

The motherfucker was dead. I hurled it across the room. I’d forgotten to charge the damn thing. The thump it made as it hit the wall was loud, but I was too horny and frustrated to care.

At least until my door swung open.

Kayson stood there in a T-shirt and boxers. “You all right?”

I wanted to die.

Disappear.

Crawl under my bed and hide.

Because six inches in front of where he stood was my vibrator.

“Yeah, everything is just peachy.” My voice was way too high, so I cleared my throat and tried again. “You’re still here?”

“I didn’t want to leave you. I had no way of locking your deadbolt or safety chain.”

He was thinking about my safety, and my only thought was don’t look down. And of course, fuck.

He fucking looked down.

My humiliation flared as he tilted his head, and a smirk curled the side of his perfect, perfect mouth.

Fuck. I was so busted.

“Is that what I think it is?” he asked as he bent down to pick up my leopard print sex toy.

Jumping from my bed, I snatched it out of his hand and shoved it back into my bedside drawer. “It’s nothing.”

“It looked like something to me.”

“Well, it wasn’t.” I huffed, refusing to turn around and face him. He wasn’t letting me off the hook that easily, though. I squeezed my eyes shut as he moved deeper into my room, and then I felt his forearm slide over my shoulder and rest there. I cracked my eyes open just enough to see that he was dangling my recently discarded panties in front of me.

You have to be kidding me. What made this whole situation worse? His free hand was on my hip. Warm and big and inviting. That hand promised all sorts of delicious things as it squeezed, pulling me back against the heat of his chest.

Forcing myself to slow my breathing down and regain control.

“You know,” he whispered against the soft skin of my neck, “if you need help letting off some steam, I’m happy to oblige.”

“I said it was nothing.” Everything from my breathy words to the thundering pace of my heart told him that was a big, fat lie. I was so turned on that he could probably smell my arousal. I didn’t want a relationship, just one or two times with this man. This man had me wound so tight that I was going to break at any moment.

“If by nothing, you mean sex toy, then okay.” He moved back an inch, and I wanted to scream in frustration. Thankfully, he only did it so he could turn me around. I tilted my chin so I could look at him, which was a mistake because he took it as permission to drop a kiss to the corner of my mouth. He moved his lips along my cheek to my neck and kissed behind my ear.

“Stop that. I can’t think if you’re doing that.” My words were worthless, because even as they were leaving my mouth, I was tilting my head to give him better access and pressing my body closer to his.

He slid his left hand up my arm, and I twitched as he left goose bumps in his wake.

“I need to go brush my teeth,” I said as I pulled back, but he caught my hand, stopping my escape and pulling my back to his front.

“Mm-hm.” His warm breath tickled the shell of my ear as he wrapped his arms around me and pressed his erection into me.

“I called you when I left the station, but you didn’t answer, so I called the restaurant. They told me that you had left shortly after I did,” he said, sliding one hand around the hem of my T-shirt. “Then I came by your apartment, but you weren’t here.” He inched his hand up under my shirt and paused at my hip, waiting for me to slap it away or tell him to leave. I didn’t do either.

“Did you?” he asked.

“Did I what?”

“Come?”

“None of your business. Did you really look for me?”

“I told you that I would. And don’t change the subject. I’m making it my business. Did you come?”

He traced the outline of the V between my legs with one finger. “I want this, but I need to know that you want this.”

For some reason his words controlled my legs because when he said that my knees buckled. His gentle hands that seconds ago had been tracing the outline of my body were now pressing me back toward the bed.

“Do you want this?”

My breath faltered as his fingers traced a lazy path up to my breast before he cupped the weight of it, pinching my nipple between his thumb and forefinger. My only answer was a barely coherent moan as he dropped deep kisses along my shoulder.

“You never answered my question. Did you?”

“No. The damn thing was dead,” I admitted.

His soft chuckle vibrated against the curve of my neck. “Lucky for me.”

He caressed my skin with his large hands, and I felt pint-sized electrodes shoot through my body and race straight to my core.

“Would you like to come?”

“Obviously.”

“Tell me you want me to make you come.” Kayson’s voice was deep and raspy.

“Yes. Damn it. I want you to make me come.”

Kayson thrust his tongue inside my mouth and wicked thoughts filled my head, this wasn’t all I wanted him thrusting inside me.