IT’S HARD TO MEASURE TIME IN DARKNESS. I counted the slow drips from a leaky pipe above my head as it fell somewhere to the left of me. The roll of waves under the boat also came in a steady pattern.
Strangely those two constants helped me hold on.
Drip. Drip. Drip.
Roll. Roll. Roll.
Drip and Roll.
I counted two hundred sequences of each in tens, three times a day. Then the door would open, and he’d filled my water bowl on the floor instructing me to crawl to it like a dog and drink on all fours.
I refused.
I waited until he left, then counted my steps in the darkness to drink. He hasn’t touched me since the day we boarded. I’ve tried in vain to count days. But they too got lost in the dark. He comes three times, but I can’t tell when it’s night or when it’s morning.
He left a bucket for me to relieve myself in. I’ve peed but refuse to do anything else, which is easy considering he leaves me pieces of meat on a plate next to the water bowl.
A dog.
He kept me chained, treating me like a wild dog. With every day that goes by, the woman I was slips further and further from my grasp.
The door opened, causing my eyes to snap up. Light streamed in through the open door, blinding me. My pupils even forgetting how to see in the brightness.
He strolled in, screwed the light bulb back in place, and I cried out in anguish as the brightness burned my retinas. I squeezed my eyes shut, wincing in pain, bringing my shackled hands up to cover my face.
“You smell.”
“I wonder why?”
He came forward, unclasping my wrists one by one. But I hadn’t eaten in days, my belly rumbled, my legs and arms were weak. I didn’t even protest as he swept me up in his arms and carried me through a hall and up a set of stairs.
He opened a door to what must be the master stateroom and placed me in a claw-footed tub.
I still couldn’t open my eyes due to the intense light.
“Here.” He tied a silk blindfold around my head.
“Thank you,” I murmured, sinking down into bubbles that smelled of lavender.
“You need to eat.”
“I’m a vegetarian,” I lied. I just refused to be fed like a dog, so I went hungry.
“You eat cock just fine.”
“Please, Christos…,” I bit my lip, too weak to play his game.
“I’ll make this concession once. I’ll prepare something.”
He left me in peace. My wrists burned from where the metal chaffed my soft skin. I was so weak I could barely wash myself with the cloth he placed in my hand.
“Drink.”
I dropped the cloth, startled I didn’t hear him walk back in. He held a cup to my lips. I swallowed the sticky, sweet orange juice as it went down my throat, gulping it down so fast, it dribbled down my chin.
“Easy there, dove.”
“I can’t see. I’m scared, Christos. What if I’m going blind? What have you done?” I screamed.
“Easy, there. Relax, my pet. It will take time for your pupils to adjust to light again, but I assure you, that you’re not losing your eye sight.”
“When? When will it return?”
“That depends. Are you going to be a good girl, or do you need more time in the hold?”
My body tensed. I wanted to fight—tell him he can go to hell and rot. But I need to remember my plan…to pretend to give in, let him think he’s won so that I can plan my escape.
My hands clenched beneath the bubbles, nails digging into my palm as I answered, “Anything. I’ll do anything but go back in there.”
“That’s it my sweet. Open your mouth.” The sound of a zipper lowering was amplified by my lack of sight.
The smell of his raw masculinity filled my nostrils. The hairs from his groin tickled my nose. I kept my hands beneath the water as my mouth snapped open. He wasted no time jamming the thick head of his cock between my lips, my protests muffled by his monster dick shoving in deep until it hit the back of my throat.
“You can do better, pet. Take it all, take me deep. That’s it…be a good girl,” he groaned, his touch gentle at the back of my head despite the cruel way his hips fucked my mouth. I did as he wanted. Stroked the head of his meaty cock with my tongue, paying special attention to the sensitive undertip, sucking and licking as he did to my clit all those days ago.
Water sloshed over the side of the tub as he demanded I take it all. I gagged; choked on him and yet…there it was. The truth. Heat uncurled from the center of my belly traveling south, my nipples beaded, the tips floating just beneath the surface of the water, aching for him to pay attention to the rosy buds.
I wanted this.
Just not like this.
I’d give anything to have my demanding ass of a lover from Capri back, instead of this heartless master.
“Ch-h-r-istossss?”
I tried to talk to him about my feelings while my mouth was full of cock.
“Shut up. Make me come,” he replied removing one hand from behind my head to smack me across the chest. The scab over my nipple cracked open. He became harder in my mouth, if that was even possible. He rutted into me, fucking my hole just as he said he would. Mouth, check. He’s already been in my pussy, pseudo-check. I shuddered wondering when he would claim my last entrance while secretly intrigued as to what it would feel like.
One finger traced the trickle of blood around my breast before pinching my nipple at the same time his dick in my mouth hardened and shook. He was coming. His eruption happened in fast, hot spurts of cum hitting my tonsils.
I tried to break away. I couldn’t breathe. My mouth was filled with him, his pelvic bones smashed hard against my face as he grabbed the back of my head, coaxing the last drops of his orgasm from him.
Finally, just as I was about to pass out, he released me. My chest heaved, lungs clawing for air. He didn’t care. He was beautiful. A beautiful monster.
But beautiful things cause pain.
So much pain.
“Christos?” I finally pleaded when I could form words. “Please. It doesn’t have to be like this. I want you back. The man you were that night in Capri. It was good between us. Not like this. I-I wanted you back then. Needed it to be you—to put out the fire from the drugs…even though the two of us together are an inferno without them,” I pointed between the two of us.
His dark eyes assessed me. The hard planes of his face showing no emotion. He stuck his hands in his pockets, crossed his legs and leaned back against the counter and studied me.
“Maybe. Maybe it could have been like that. If you hadn’t run out. If you had just stayed, letting us spend the morning the same way we spent the night.”
“I-I’m sorry. I was scared. You were too much. I’ve never had a lover like you. It was overwhelming. I needed space to process everything we did…everything we shared.”
The water in the tub turned lukewarm, I finally raised my hands, noticing the skin resembled raisins. He stroked the tip of his chin, he was relaxed, cool; untouchable. “This is the most honest you’ve been with me, glykiá mou. Your honesty shall be rewarded.”
“Then you want it too? To get back what we shared?” I felt a glimmer of hope flicker. Maybe, he’ll let his guard down. Sure, I’d have to sleep with him, pretend to fall under the spell of his filthy seduction. His crazy obsession with me is something I need to use to my advantage if I’m to escape.
“I want you. Period.” He answered, the wicked gleam in his onyx eyes matching the shine of his cufflinks.
“Then take me to bed,” I whispered, trying to seduce, the ultimate seducer.
My demand backfired, instead of him sweeping me up in his embrace, he straightened, “You need to listen. I’m in control, not you. I decide if we fuck.”
I swallowed thickly, still tasting the tang of him on my tongue. “Don’t. Please don’t ruin what we could have before we even start. It’s not too late Christos. Stop chaining me…,” I reached out with a wet hand, but he moved out of reach. For a man who wants nothing but to fuck every part of me, it was strange how he took great pains not to be near me.
“You are sounding like a woman who is confusing what this is with a relationship. I don’t do relationships.”
“Not ever? How sad for you, to go through life like this, trading one woman in for another. You must be lonely.”
“I never get lonely, little dove. Why would I when I always have a pet by my side? Sure, pets don’t live forever but they are easily replaceable, eh?” He stroked the side of my face before dropping his hands and walking out, shutting the door softly behind him.
I shuddered, rose from the tub and wrapped myself in a heated towel. Are all his previous subs, dead? Did he kidnap them all and dump their lifeless bodies overboard? Is this why he turned this luxury yacht into a prison? My mind spun in a circle, panic set in, I quickly rifled through each drawer in the bathroom looking for anything I could use as a weapon before he chained me again. But there was nothing. Nothing I could use to protect myself from him. Even though he’s never forced me, barely even looked at me in the past days, I know it’s coming. There’s a shift in the air, a change in the tides and if I’m not careful—I’ll get dragged under.
Then suddenly the door opened, I stood up quickly with a guilty look stamped all over my face. “Ah, dove, I’d be disappointed if you didn’t search for something, but there’s nothing here, but me and you. Come.” He held out a hand, his handsome face showing none of the tension he was full of in Capri.
I was terrified.
In the short time I knew him, I learned that Christos had the charm of an angel when he wanted but underneath his overpowering beauty was the ugly darkness of the devil. He switched back and forth between the two, at times it was as if he was two men sharing one soul. One side dark, the other pure light.
He linked our hands. Fire shot up my arm from where we touched. I hate him; I kept telling myself. He’s evil, a kidnapper, a sadist, probably a killer, but my body craved his touch. I couldn’t deny it.
“Put this on.” He held up a fine ivory silk teddy that fell to mid-thigh. My towel dropped to the floor, and I raised my arms, feeling the cool material slide down over my pebbled nipples. It slid over my flesh in a caress. I removed the blindfold he had fastened earlier. Wearing it made me feel weak, making me more vulnerable to him than I already was. I turned in his arms, lips pouting, begging for a kiss, a touch—for him to fuck me like I knew he could. His eyes were on my nipples, straining through the fabric, my dark pink buds were so ripe for him, it was as if the material was sheer instead of ivory.
He muttered something in Greek, bent his head and circled my nipple with his tongue. The wet silk clung to my breast. Then he did the same thing to my other breast. I moaned clutching the back of his head. He breathed hard, resting his head against my stomach as his arms came around me.
His hands roamed down to my ass, cupped my firm cheeks, rubbed me over the silk, sighing as he moved down between my naked thighs. His breath tickling my warmth, “fuck you’re beautiful. Just once, maybe I could give you what you want if you give me what I want.”
“What’s that?”
“Total domination. Give yourself over to me, no protests, no safe words…no limits.”
“No safe words?”
“Safe words are for amateurs. I’m not a traditional DOM…I take everything.”
Holy fuck.
Would I do it?
“I want more than my lover from Capri, Christos. I want my freedom back.”
“No.”
“Then you have your answer.”
I moved past him, but his arm came out, snaking me around the waist. “Slaves have to earn their freedom.” He dragged me to a dresser where another pair of shackles lay. He clipped one to each wrist, leading me around like a dog on a leash made from chains.
“It’s time to eat. Oh, I almost forgot, here.” He opened a drawer, taking out an oversized pair of dark sunglasses. “Wear these for the next few days, until your pupils recover.”
The smell of the open air filled my lungs. Even though I was chained, the ocean air helped me feel a bit freer. Freer than I had felt in days. He led me to a table on the back of the boat, shaded by a sun sail. The sun wasn’t overly bright, and I knew it must be late afternoon or early evening.
“What time is it? Better yet, what day is it?”
He pulled my chair out for me to sit, then took a seat opposite me, unfolded my napkin and placed it in my lap.
“May 25th.” He glanced at the watch on his wrist, “five o’clock, or thereabout.”
“I’ve been here for only four days? It feels like forever.” I picked at the hem of the linen napkin fighting back tears. I was so confused. I wanted to be free, to be the woman I was, but…but I couldn’t deny the attraction that made me wonder if he gave me the choice if I would’ve chosen to have a fling with him, despite every warning bell ringing in my head?
He pulled the chain to my cuffs tight, scooted his chair next to mine and uncovered a few dishes.
“Eat.” He brought a piece of food to my mouth, feeding me like a child.
The salmon melted like butter in my mouth. I closed my mouth and chewed. He knew I wasn’t a vegetarian. He knew everything about me on paper. But I’ll show him I’m much more than a document of likes and dislikes.
“This is delicious.”
“I made it. There’s no one here but us, no one to hear the screams that will be coming from this sweet mouth later.” I shifted in my seat. Was tonight the night he’d take me again?
“Tough words, for a man who’s scared of me.”
The fork clattered on my plate. He dropped it as if it was on fire. My chair was hauled back, he picked me up like a ragdoll. “I’ve waited long enough. You push all my buttons little one. But, maybe; you’re right. Eh? Maybe, I am the one afraid…not you.”
Our lips crashed together, my bound hands were crushed against his chest as he carried me inside. But he didn’t take me to his bedroom.
Of course.
How could I be so stupid, goading him? I’m not good at acting or games. How am I going to fool him into setting me free when I keep trapping myself?
He kicked the door to the ship’s “playroom” open. He removed a key from his pocket, releasing my cuffs.
“Thank you.”
“Ah, pet. I just released you because this suits you much better.” He lifted a silver collar with crystals embedded around it.
“What is that?” My eyes were open but everything was clouded by dots. I could still make out shapes, though.
“A submissive collar.”
“You are collaring me, like a dog?”
“No. I’m claiming you in the only way I know how to. It’s a brand stronger than a wedding ring. Everyone will see it and know your worth to me.”
“Who? There’s no one here, you madman. Besides, I haven’t agreed to be your sub. The contract I signed was under duress and shredded with no trace of it.”
My dark devil stalked toward me, lifted the hair off my neck as he moved behind me, placing it around my slim throat. “If you want to step one foot on land again, you’ll wear it and obey me. Fuck contracts. You’re mine and we both know it. Alex texted, he expects us both at his final stag party in a few weeks. Learn and obey, or I leave you here chained and alone.”
“We’re going back aboard the Oasis?” My heart leapt, knowing I had allies there. Allies who could help me.
“No. It’s at a very special place. One I used to visit often, the villa of my friend Dimitri.”
I didn’t protest as he snapped the clasp closed. My fingers felt the stones at my throat.
“It looks beautiful on you. Worth every penny.”
Confused I tried to look down.
“Did you think they were fake? Around your neck is a million dollars’ worth of flawless diamonds.”
“And attached to that is a platinum chain.”
“Ah, sweeting. Don’t you see? You wear the collar but I’m the one chained.” He cupped the back of my head, pressing his lips to mine. It was unexpectedly tender. He does have feelings for me, he must.
He led me to the center of the room, dropping the chain he held in his fingers. “Crawl over to the corner of the room. Kneel facing the wall and wait for your instructions.”
I seethed inside, as I dropped to the rug, knowing why he wanted me to crawl. I was bare; exposed. The hem of the nightie would ride up, showing him everything. I was tempted to stick my ass out but knew he would see that as an invitation to take a part of me I wasn’t ready to give.
The floor was rough, scraping my knees as I did his bidding. I didn’t dare move my head as the sound of his belt hitting the floor came from behind me.
This is it. It’s happening. Christos is going to make me his, and I’ll probably beg without being able to blame any narcotics.
He’ll know I want him buried deep inside me. But maybe that’s okay. Maybe needing his thick girth to pound into the very center of me is my ticket to freedom.
I felt him moving toward me. Heat came off him as he stopped. A finger traced up my spine. “I’ve waited an eternity for this moment. God, I could come just from the sight of you kneeling here like a good girl. Like my good girl. But even though you are being good now…you were very, very bad.” He leaned down, his breath tickled my ear moving wisps of hair, “did you think I would forget your punishment for leaving me tied up in my bed?”
I shivered, feeling hot and cold. My heart thumped, as I waited for his next move. Where would he touch me next? Would it be pleasurable, or one laced with pain?
He knelt behind me, taking me by surprise. I felt both the warm slide of his tongue on the side of my neck and the hot steel with its wet tip pressing into my lower back. I moaned, wanting to taste him again. His hands slid down my chest, tugged each nipple as his tongue continued to slide over my skin. “Ah, Christos,” I gasped as one hand slid between my curls, to tease me. Still kneeling, I spread my knees further apart, inviting him to take more.
“I’m not Christos, in here. You know how to address me.”
“Yes, Sir.”
He smacked my ass. “Try again.”
“Yes…master.”
“There it is, my dove.” He rewarded me by rubbing my clit, kissing the nape of my neck while letting his cock, dripping with pre-cum, rest on me.
“I want you like no other. Can that be enough for now?”
Stunned by his raw honesty, I turned my head, my lips falling on his forearm. “It is…just please let me touch you. Let me in…” Our eyes met, mine pleaded with his to give me something, anything.
“There’s nothing to let you into.”
Confused, I tried to turn around to face him fully. But his tan hands held me firm. “Ah. My sweet pet. We’ve broken every rule. This isn’t a place for words, only for our bodies to give each other pleasure and pain.”
He pulled back from my ear, his large hand moving over my back, down to cup my ass. The loud stinging slap took me by surprise even if my mind knew it was probably coming.
“Do you have to do this?”
His answer was another smack.
I tried to be submissive. I did. But he didn’t break my spirit as much as we both had thought. My hands curled into fists by my side; I felt the air move at my back as he raised his hand again.
“No.” I stood up, quickly racing to the other side of the room. “You think you’ve broken me, turned me into some pet, your dove,” I spat. “But I know who I am Christos! JESSIE MONTGOMERY from SAN DIEGO CALIFORNIA! I won’t let you take my self-worth, my identity, or try to confuse me into accepting any of this!” My hands grabbed anything I could, throwing item after item at his head.
In the middle of my tirade, the sight of him standing completely naked, dodging left then right, as the objects I threw sailed past him hitting the wall made my toes curl and my tummy clench.
He was glorious.
Utterly and devastatingly glorious as he watched silently, saying nothing as I tore his room apart.
“Are you done?”
“Not even close!”
He crossed his arms. I was breaking shit left and right, while he just stood there; emotionless. It enraged me further. “Come near me, and I’ll hurt you.” The whip I picked up from a desk cracked as I smacked it against the floor.
“Fuck, I’m so hard for you. My little dove has turned into a tigress, eh?”
He came straight at me; I raised the whip high, he grabbed my wrist before I could land a lash against his muscular back.
“I’m on fire for you. Feel it.” His hand gripped my wrist, about to snap the bone if I didn’t comply. My hand was brought down to feel him, all hard, hot and ready to go. My teeth sank into my lower lip; god help me, I wanted this monster inside me, right now.
The whip fell from my hand, as he picked me up, hooked my legs around his waist, deposited me on a desk and let the steel rod between his legs tease my entrance.
“Admit what you want.”
My eyes raised to his in defeat, “I want you, master. Right here—,” I touched myself, then wet the tip of him with my own need.
His nostrils flared, “how you please me. I can’t ever let you go. No one. There’s never been anyone else who does this to me, glykiá mou.”
A gasp escaped my lips as he rocked into me in one smooth thrust. He stilled as the tip of him went as deep as he could go, touching my womb. Flutters rippled through me as his thick, pulsing cock filled me completely. He was home, and we both knew it.
I shut my eyes, gasping as his lips tugged on a nipple before his tongue captured it in his hot mouth. I didn’t care if he’d punish me for touching him, I needed to. It was as simple as that. My hands kneaded through the hair at the back of his head, urging his mouth closer. He started pumping in and out in a steady rhythm, each stroke making us moan in shared pleasure.
“You’re so tight, little one. So tight…” He shut his eyes. Something in me felt triumphant as I watched his flushed cheeks, felt his sharp breath on my skin as the pleasure of being inside me was written all over his face.
His hands moved, gripping my ass, lifting me off the desk as he increased the pace of his thrusts. Curses in Greek rasped against my ear as he took us both higher.
I stopped fighting him for the moment, lost in where he was taking us. I bit back a scream as I felt the first trembles deep inside me slowly erupt into a crest of a wave. My orgasm ripped through me. It went on and on...more powerful than the ones he gave me when I was on drugs.
I cried, bit his shoulder, as my walls clenched around him. He pulled out, breathing hard, refusing to come.
“Christos?”
“It’s okay my dove. You did well. You please me, the way you let it happen, let go and let me give you the sweetest pleasure a man can give a woman.”
“It was intense,” I admitted.
“Of course it was. I edged you all week. Made you want me even as you fought it, brought you to the brink, then left you to burn. I know you hated me for it, but it was worth it, yes?”
His smugness at how skillfully he seduced me, trapped me into craving his touch made my cheeks hot.
He must’ve seen the flash of anger on my face; his hands yanked the chain of the submissive collar around my neck, spun me around and entered me hard.
“My turn,” he groaned, spreading my knees apart and telling me to press my hands flat on the desk.
I fought it; wanted to deny him anything I could. “Still fighting me? You should be thanking me for giving you the greatest pleasure of your life.”
“That’s all I’m ever going to give you. You’ll never get another piece of me.”
His answer was a sharp slap followed by another and another. I tried to buck him off, but he pressed me down. My stomach lay flat on the cool wooden desk as he replaced his hand with something harder. The whip. He picked up the whip I tried to use on him. The leather rope was a sharper pain; it stung like a thousand bee stings as he brought it down on my soft flesh. I could tell it brought him some sort of perverse pleasure to bring me pain.
“Why Christos? Please stop.” My sobs echoed in the room; my slippery hands slid on the desk as I attempted to crawl over it to escape his torment.
He dropped the whip, his hands caressing my inflamed skin, then I felt the cool touch of his lips where it burned.
I jerked in surprise as his tongue separated the cleft between my cheeks, seeking a forbidden place where I couldn’t imagine letting anyone go.
“N-no…I-uh...,” I gasped as he held me down, his hands spread my cheeks, his tongue finding my puckered hole.
It was decadent, wicked, and oh-so-good.
His soft laugh, made me flush pink as he pulled back, spanked me lightly, letting his fingers tease my forbidden spot.
“Soon, my pet, soon. You must be trained to learn this is natural…a part of the pleasure I can give you.”
My head ached as he tugged my hair, wrapped it around his wrist while his other hand held the chain. He fit himself against my entrance, slid in and rode me to his climax. His hips bucked. His hard thighs pressed down on my blistered and bruised ass as he pumped in and out. The thick head of him hitting my spot. I quivered, convulsed, coming for the devil again.
I felt him shudder against my back seconds before I felt him spasming and releasing waves of his hot seed deep inside me.
“You’re mine, always and forever,” he vowed, refusing to pull out, leaving all of him inside me. The heavy weight of him collapsed on me, lips finding the back of my neck. I was defeated, spent, but it felt sublime. I gave into him, letting it happen and found peace in my submission, my willingness to let go. He might be crazy, but he was right. It felt free. I felt free, despite my chains; even if it was only for the moment in which he made me soar.
No words were needed as he picked up my limp body, carrying me back to the claw-footed tub. He filled the water high, added a few drops of a scented oil then climbed in behind me. I hissed, wincing as the water made contact with the cuts and wounds from where he let his hand and whip fall
“Easy, go in slowly. It’ll feel better. I added some bath salts to ease the pain.”
I bit my lip, hating myself for letting him comfort me, as he laid me back against his smooth chest, kissed my shoulder, while lazily rubbing my breasts with a bar of soap. I was emotionally and physically drained. His soft caresses, lulling me to sleep. I felt safe, protected in the devil’s embrace. I knew he hurt me and would hurt me still, but he’d also kill anyone who dared to touch or look at me. I was his property, and he’d fight to the death for me. I was confused as I drifted off sheltered in his arms. What was it about him that had me on the precipice of both hate and love?
I woke sometime later nestled in his arms in a bed of soft linens. The gentle rock of the boat, the heat of his body, the protective hand that wrapped around my waist, had cracked through the shield I pretended to have in place. I couldn’t stop the feelings I had for him from growing. Despite, how he took me captive—I found myself weakening, wanting to stay, be his for real.
“What are you thinking, little one?”
“You’re awake?” I turned, facing him. He shifted still holding me but letting our faces almost touch. He speared my heart. His dark eyes were soft as he gazed at me sleepily, his dark hair tousled, his face covered with stubble. He was a slumbering sexy beast and all mine.
I was vulnerable, sated and wished—hoped we could still be more, have more. “Tell me something, about yourself, anything. You know so much about me, down to my favorite brand of shampoo. While you are a complete enigma.”
He sighed, his fingers lazily drawing circles on my back, “the truth is I’ve never felt as close to another living creature as I do you.”
His other hand smoothed the frown on my forehead. “It’s true. I’m not a complex man, and yet I’m the most complex.”
“Then tell me, tell me everything. We could be so much more…I know you feel it too,” my hand splayed against his beating heart as I pleaded for him to share himself with me.
“Maybe, we could. You give me hope, little dove. Hope that I can be normal, have a normal relationship.”
“Then let’s start, right now. Tonight.” My quivering lips pressed gently to his. He whispered something unintelligible against my mouth, as he shifted moving over me. My devil turned into a gentle lover, using soft hands and soft-spoken words, with slow-moving hips.
Our breaths mingled as we moaned in unison, hands locked, fingers entwined on either side of my head as we became one.
The word was on the tip of my tongue. It took everything to pull it back, stopping it from spilling from my lips. The devil held my heart. I gave it to him, willingly; not caring how fast it went. I wanted him to trust me for real, my plans to escape forgotten. Surely, if we became a real couple, he wouldn’t feel the need to chain me anymore?
“Christos,” I breathed, into his mouth, our tongues in love, dueling.
“Yes, agápe mou, climb higher with me.”
So, I did. My hips sped up, coming off the bed to meet his. We kissed on and on, bodies slick with our dark passion until we both soared to the sky at the same time.
He kissed me deeply, tenderly as our bodies spasmed around each other.
“I’m falling in love with you,” I breathed, unable to stop them this time.
His dark eyes met mine, “I think, I might be falling in love, too.” Then he rolled over, laughing, leaving me fuming.
“What’s so funny?”
“This. Us. Ah, my love. I never thought any of this was possible.” I shrieked as he grabbed me, slid out of bed, twirling me in his arms.
“You are crazy.”
“Yes, agape. I always told you that.” He spun us both into a large tiled shower. We kissed as we washed one another. My body was singing. I didn’t even know how it happened…how he gave me what I wanted. Him, as my dark lover, not my master.
“Come.” He turned the water off, holding my hand as he towel-dried us both. Then he surprised me by opening a tube of ointment, gently spreading it over every cut on my sore bottom. I sighed as it relieved my blistered skin.
“I need you to understand who I am.”
“That’s all I want.”
“Promise me, just promise me, you won’t run? That you’ll keep an open mind?” My heart melted at the vulnerable look in his eyes.
“Of course, Christos. I’m not going anywhere,” I promised, sealing it with a kiss. He shuddered under my touch. He was just as enslaved by this pull between us as I was. After we dressed in new nightclothes, I followed him outside into the warm Mediterranean night. My eyes grateful, I could see the stars again. He had us anchored in a small harbor at the base of a massive cliff.
“It’s so beautiful out here.”
“Yes, it is,” he replied, his eyes never leaving mine. He leaned back against the deck rail, searching for the right words. “I’m defective. I was born with a very rare condition, so rare, anytime I dare tell someone they don’t believe it.”
I walked to him, taking his hand in mine, kissed his knuckles and knelt at his feet.
He sucked in a breath as I gave my submission, my trust to him, without him needing to use threats, caresses, or mind games. He stroked the top of my head, eyes looking out to sea and continued. “I can’t feel anything. I was a strange child, nothing frightened me, made me smile or coo. I just stared at everyone and everything. The doctors weren’t concerned at first as I could talk, walk, do the normal things a growing child would. But as I got older, it became apparent; I was different. I didn’t show affection for my parents. Never cried, laughed, or cared to make friends. You see, I have no soul glykiá mou, no feelings, all that’s in here is a black hole.” He pointed to his chest.
I swiftly rose to my feet, “that’s not true. You have a soul Christos, I know it because it’s the other half of mine.” He bent, kissed the top of my head then grabbed my hand, tugging me back to him.
“When I first saw your face, I felt something. You were a magnet. I had to have you, meet you, own you. I almost crash landed the chopper when I saw you standing on the deck with your hair blowing around you. You were barefoot and beautiful. And I never wanted anyone more. After that night when you ran from me, jumping decks, I knew that I had to try. You see, my mother never stopped hoping for a normal child. She couldn’t have any more after me—so she gave every penny she had to fund research for my condition, it’s called, alexithymia.”
“But you do feel, Christos.”
“I feel passion, sure. My body functions as any red-blooded male’s does. But I don’t form attachments, feel angry or sad. I’ve never loved. But I have these pills—funded by grants from my mother to Hexagon Pharmaceuticals. It’s hush-hush, no one knows, and…I started taking them after the night we met.”
“I don’t understand. How could a pill make a person feel?”
“By altering my brain chemicals. The theory is my emotions are locked inside, trapped. My mind is unable to process them. That’s how I became how I am, with women. Every sense, every nerve ending is heightened when all a person can feel is touch.”
“But you feel me? In here?” My fingers stroked between his pecs. I stopped, placed my palm on his chest feeling his beating heart.
“If anyone can get inside—it’s you.”
He stood in the moonlight, with eyes begging me to accept him. The powerful ripples of his muscles shone as he stretched, flexed his jaw and waited for my reaction to his truth.
“Oh, Christos, I’m so sorry. I-I can’t imagine living without really living.”
“I don’t want your pity, little dove.”
“I can’t help it.”
“Just promise me, you’ll stay. Give me a chance to be a man you could be with.”
I felt the cold chain, down my back. “Release me. See if I stay.” I challenged, with an eyebrow raised.
“So that’s it, eh? Open the cage and see if the dove returns?” He unclipped the chain from the collar. But left the diamond encrusted circle at my throat.
“Christos?”
“Leave it. Wear it for me, my dove, as a sign to the world you’re mine.”
“The dove won’t return, because she’ll never leave you,” I replied, bending to sweep my tongue down his abs, through the fine hairs traveling south. I cupped his balls through his black silk pants, gently rubbed his growing length, becoming the master and him a slave to my touch.
“Jessie,” he breathed, him now being the one to thread his fingers in my hair as I knelt, pulled him out, worshipping him with my mouth. He spoke my name in a plea that warmed my heart. He wanted me, Jessie, the woman. Not his dove, who he saw as a pet. I knew the pills would work, that he’d share all of himself with me. Just as I would give all I am to him.