Why is it when you have the whole day to binge-watch Netflix, you can never decide what series to watch?
I scroll through the same things over and over again, frustrated and bored. Pretty Little Liars—seen. Shooter—watched. Gilmore Girls—watched and rewatched. The Last Kingdom—been there, done that. But hey, Uhtred can be watched over and over again, right?
Smirking, I hit play and wait as the first episode loads. The musical opening starts and I do a little dance on the sofa. There’s nothing sexier than a Viking.
“A?”
I frown as I hear Tristan’s voice after he knocks on the pool house door. Pausing the TV, I stand up and turn around, seeing him standing on the other side of the door, his hands in his pockets.
“Hey,” I say, pushing the door open and stepping back.
“Hey.” He runs his hand through his hair. “I know it’s Saturday, but—”
“You need me to have the kids?” I interrupt.
“I… yeah.” His gray eyes focus on mine, looking frustrated. “I have to go into the city for a board meeting. It’s all this Pete stuff—”
“No worries.” I wave him off, spinning around and picking up my remote.
“Are you sure?” I flick my gaze to him as he leans to the side, looking at the TV behind me. “I hate to interrupt your Netflix time.”
“It’s okay.” I shrug, turning the TV off before walking over to my bed and picking up my cell off the nightstand and grabbing my bag. “I’d much rather spend the afternoon with the kids.”
“You sure? I can always ask my mom.”
“Tris.” I walk back over to him, stepping out of the pool house and waiting for him to follow me out. “It’s my job. Go to the city, we’ll be fine.” I make a shooing motion to him.
“Thanks, A.” He throws his arm over my shoulder, walking with me to the main house and stopping when we get to the kitchen table. “You had another delivery.” His eyes watch me, probably waiting for some kind of sign or freak-out like I had last week.
“Ohhh!” I clap my hands to hide the shaking. “They must be my new shoes.” I push on the brightest smile as he grins, seeming to believe me.
“I better…” He hooks his thumb over his shoulder.
“I’ll check on the kids before I open my new present.”
Following him up the stairs, I head into Clay’s room. He’s sitting in his reading nook, soaking up the words of a book yet again. Walking over to Izzie’s room, me and Tris swap places as he tells them he probably won’t be back until they’re in bed.
“Hey, Izzie.”
“Amelia! Come and join the tea party!” She pats a place between her and the teddy who has a plastic cup and saucer in front of him.
“I will in a minute, I just need to head downstairs and then we can play all afternoon!”
“Yay!” She jumps up, throwing her arms in the air.
Smiling, I head out of her room, listening as Tris shouts, “Bye!” As soon as the front door closes and the tires sound on the driveway, my face drops, my heart rate picking up. Sprinting down the stairs before pushing the kitchen door open, I grab a knife and open the package. My hands shake, not able to grip the cardboard properly, slipping on the edges several times.
I may have told Tris they were new shoes, but I can’t remember the last time I bought myself anything online. He accepted the lie without a second thought. It makes me both relieved but also has my stomach churning.
I pull out the small jewelry box that’s nestled in the black tissue paper, whipping my head around to make sure neither of the kids are coming down the stairs. Once I know they’re not, I slowly pull it open.
“No,” I whisper, my voice sounding strangled as I pick up the necklace inside.
My fingers tangle with the small chain as my thumb swipes over the oval locket. It can’t be.
Flipping it over, I squeeze my eyes shut, hoping it won’t have the inscription on the back from my mom.
“Dare to be remarkable.”
My breath hitches. I’ve worn this locket every single day since I left home. How… I look up at the ceiling trying to work out if I took it off. I remember having a bath on Thursday night, but did I put it back on after?
I mustn’t have… but that must mean they’ve been inside the pool house in the last two days.
The locket slips through my fingers, landing back in the jewelry box. Snapping it closed, I push it into my back pocket, swiping the cardboard box off the table, I walk out of the kitchen and throw it toward the front door.
I need to get out of here, we can’t be in this house; not now I know they’ve been here.
They were in my space… things are escalating. The empty boxes felt like a step up to whatever the hell is going on, but this? This has to mean more.
Yanking my cell out of my pocket, I scroll through my contacts, looking for something—anything—to do to get the kids out of here and away from potential danger.
Danger? Would they hurt the kids?
The answer is I’m not one hundred percent sure, and I won’t take the risk.
Nate!
My thumb presses against his name before I type a message.
Amelia: Hey! Tris had to go into the city for the afternoon. Are you free? The kids want to visit.
I bring my thumb up to my mouth, biting on the side of it as the bubble floats on the left side of the screen. I wait, my gaze flitting from the box to the door and then up the stairs.
NATE: Free as a bird, I’d love to spend the afternoon with you all. Bring your bathing suit.
As soon as the message flashes on my screen followed by another one with his address, I run back up the stairs and head to Clay’s room first.
“We’re going to Uncle Nate’s for the afternoon,” I tell him, walking over to his drawers and getting his board shorts out. “Put your sneakers on.”
“Huh?”
Facing Clay, I see the confusion on his face. “We’re going to Uncle Nate’s.”
“But… why?”
“Because—”
“We’re going to Uncle Nate’s?” Izzie shouts, bouncing into the room and looking at Clay’s board shorts in my hand. Thank God she interrupted. “I’ll get my swimsuit!”
“Good girl!” I shout to her as she skips back into her room and returns two minutes later with her bathing suit in her hand and sunglasses on her face.
“That was quick,” I comment.
“I’m excited!” she squeals, jumping up and down. “Come on, Clay!”
“I’m coming,” he answers her, his tone flat but his lips lifted up into a grin.
We all bound down the stairs where I find a tote bag and shove their swimming gear in. “I need to get mine,” I tell them, hovering next to them.
I can’t help but not want to leave them alone, knowing someone has gotten onto the property. I stumble as a shiver rolls through me, the hairs on the back of my neck standing up.
“Izzie do you think you could help me choose?”
“Sure! Come on, Clay.”
“I’ll stay here.”
I widen my eyes; he definitely can’t stay on his own. “We’ll leave through the back gate,” I say, walking past them and collecting the box I threw by the front door.
They follow me without a question asked, and once Izzie has decided I should wear my black two piece and I’ve put the box containing the necklace in my nightstand, we’re ready and heading out the back gate.
Locking it behind me, I place the cardboard box in the recycle bin, pressing the button on the fob to open the car. I strap Izzie in, checking on Clay before pulling my cell out and putting the zip code in the navigation system built into the car.
“Ahhh!” Izzie shouts when we get to the end of the driveway. I jump in the seat, snapping my head around to check on her. “I’m so excited to go to Uncle Nate’s!”
I place my hand over my heart, willing it to slow down. She scared the life out of me.
“Chill out, Izzie. It’s not like you haven’t been before,” Clay says, his tone sarcastic.
I turn back around to look out of the windshield, seeing someone duck behind the corner of the house.
Could that have been them? Are they watching us?
“But it feels like it’s been fooooorrrrever!”
My eyes don’t move from the corner, willing whoever it was to come back around so I can see who it is.
“Amelia?”
“Huh?”
“What are you doing?”
I flick my gaze up to the rearview mirror, looking into Clay’s eyes. “I… nothing.” I smile. “Ready?”
He shrugs. “Sure.”
“Good, good.” I nod several times, feeling like one of the dogs you have in the back of the car window.
Turning left, I head toward Nate’s, following the directions being spoken to me. It tells me to take the next left after about fifteen minutes, and I frown because I don’t see a turning until the last minute.
The small private road is hidden; had the navigation not told me to turn I’d have never known it was here.
Both of the kids start getting excited, recognizing the road—well, Izzie was already excited, but even she squeals a little louder. My hands grip the steering wheel tighter, my nerves flowing through me like a rainstorm at the thought of being in Nate’s space.
The road finally opens up to a clearing and a gasp escapes me. The sun reflects off a giant glass house and I come to a stop, staring at it in awe. I don’t know what I expected his house to look like, but now I’m here, I know it’s all him. There’s green land as far as I can see.
A part of the glass moves and Nate appears, his hand coming up above his eyes to shield from the blaring sun. He waves me forward, but I can’t move as my gaze tracks the length of him. His cargo shorts encase his thighs and sit low on his hips, a soft-looking t-shirt stretching across his chest.
I haven’t seen him for a whole week: not since our first date.
Finally pushing my foot down on the gas pedal, I move the car forward, parking in front of a giant garage door. I haven’t even turned the engine off before the back door of the car opens and he’s reaching inside for a squirming Izzie.
“Uncle Nate! We’ve come to play.”
He picks her up, lifting her out of the car. “Hey, kiddiwinkle!”
He shuts the door as Clay and I get out at the same time. He hesitates, looking over at Nate and Izzie before moving toward me where I’m opening the trunk to get our bag out.
I frown at him, is he picking up on my paranoia? When Nate moves his attention to us, Clay smiles. “Hey, Uncle Nate.”
“Hey, bud. I thought we could have some fun in the lake today.”
“Sure,” Clay replies, still not moving from my side as I close the trunk.
Nate steps forward, Izzie still in his arms as he takes the tote bag from my hand and leans forward, placing a kiss on my cheek.
“Hey, beautiful,” he whispers in my ear before pulling back and walking toward his house. I stand still, shocked at what he called me, and when he turns back around, he smiles. “Well come on then, we all need to change.”
Izzie’s giggles surround us as they walk through the door, and when I step forward, Clay’s hand slips into mine. We walk toward the house, and I come to a stop as soon as we pass the threshold.
My eyes don’t know what to look at first in the large open room. My sandals slap off the wooden floor and I cringe, wondering if I should take them off. Clay’s hand releases mine and he walks ahead, through the middle of the room and past the living area to the left and through the sliding double doors.
Stepping farther inside, I close the front door behind me, slowly wandering past the cream sofa, my fingers trailing along the wooden table sitting in the center of the sofa and a loveseat. Stopping at the edge of the rug in front of the stone fireplace I pull my sandals off, closing my eyes as I step onto it, my feet sinking into it. It’s like walking on a cloud.
I can already imagine what it looks like burning real wood, the reflection of the fire flickering off the windows. The pads of my fingers whisper down my arm, almost able to feel the warmth.
Spinning in a slow circle, my curiosity gets the better of me when I take note of the hallway sitting on the other side of the room behind a reception table with a huge bouquet of fresh lilies presented in the center. Sandals dangling from my fingers, I make my way toward it, but when I see all the doors trailing off it, Izzie shouts out for me.
Eyes wide, I turn back around and head for the same double doors Clay went through and into a top-of-the-line kitchen. The wooden counters match the hardwood floors, a large wooden dining table sitting to the right, glass sliding doors behind it. You can tell it’s a well-used kitchen, the layout made for socializing, especially with the amount of chairs sitting around the table.
My gaze wanders through the sliding door, seeing Izzie already in her suit and Clay standing in his board shorts and a t-shirt.
Walking between the giant table and the island surrounded with stools, I head outside and over to the tote bag resting on a chair. Pulling out my bikini, I drop my sandals in the top of the bag.
“Where can I get changed?” I ask Nate who is now standing in only his board shorts. Dear God, those muscles are captivating.
“If you walk back through to the main room, there’s a hallway on your left and you can either change in the first door on the left or the one on the right.” He shrugs. “Totally up to you.”
“Okay,” I reply, turning back around and heading to the hallway I was going to snoop through.
Four doors sit on either side of the hallway with one at the end. I push through the first door on the left, coming into a modern, light bathroom. A large open shower takes up the lefthand wall, a huge vanity on the wall opposite, the mirror above it taking up most of the wall.
The door clicks shut behind me and I change as quickly as I can into my bikini, wishing I would have brought a cover-up with me. Cringing, I look around for a towel but can’t see anything hanging up and there’s no way I’m going to search for one.
He said we’re going to the lake anyway, so I may as well put my clothes back on over the top. Pulling my white tank back over my head, I push my legs through my linen shorts before tying the belt around my waist.
When I walk back outside, Nate, Clay, and Izzie are waiting for me, my sandals now hanging off the ends of Nate’s fingers, several towels draped over his other arm. He holds my sandals out to me and I take them gratefully, sliding my feet back into them.
With a cheeky grin on his face he says, “You guys stay here, I’ll be back in a minute,” and runs back through the house.
I move over to Izzie, pulling a hair tie off my wrist and putting her hair up, knowing if we’re going in the lake it’ll get wet and tangled if I don’t.
“I’m so excited!” she shouts when I move back a step. “Today’s going to be so much fun!”
“It is,” I agree, my head whipping around at the sound of a small engine. When I see Nate driving a golf cart, I shake my head.
“Can I sit up front with you, Uncle Nate?” Izzie asks, running over to him when he comes to a stop, his eyes sparkling with as much excitement as Izzie is displaying.
“Sure you can!” He gets out and helps her into her seat, buckling her in before looking back at me. “Sorry, you’ve been demoted.”
“That’s alright.” I place my arm around Clay’s shoulders and steer him toward the back seats. “We don’t mind being chauffeur driven.” We sit down and I wink at Clay before shouting, “We’re ready, driver! Take us to the lake.”
Clay chuckles, his gray eyes lighting up. “Yeah!” he shouts to them. “Let’s get going!”
“As you wish!” Nate shouts and Izzie giggles next to him.
We’re pushed forward in our seats as Nate moves the cart, taking us through a trail in a small wooded area, past a wooden building on the left. He’s only driving for a couple of minutes before he breaks through the trees onto a large patch of grass.
He comes to a stop about thirty feet from the sand at the edge of the lake before jumping out and grabbing all of the towels off the seat behind him and helping Izzie down.
“Wow,” I say when me and Clay jump out of our seats.
The sparkling blue water in the lake is almost see-through, not the murky kind of water I imagined it would be.
“Can we go in?” Clay asks as Izzie runs down to the sand, pulling her own sandals off.
I look down at him. “Of course.” Taking his hand, we walk down to the sand, coming to a stop next to where Nate has placed the towels and is waiting for us.
“Who wants to race me to the floating dock?”
“Me!” Izzie and Clay shout at the same time.
Clay pulls off his t-shirt, throwing it on top of the towels and diving into the water along with Izzie, Nate not far behind them.
I watch them with a giant grin on my face, Izzie’s little arms working as fast as they can as she swims across the lake to the dock. Clay is ahead of her but when he turns his head back and sees how far behind she is, he slows down and lets her overtake him. Always taking care of his sister.
Bringing my hand above my eyes to shield them from the sun, I chuckle when Izzie struggles to get up onto the dock, but with a little help from Clay, she nearly makes it until Nate comes and picks her up like she weighs nothing at all and plants her on there.
Clay gets up next, sitting on the edge, his feet still in the water. When he looks back at me, waving his arm frantically, I do the same which causes Nate to swing his head around, a frown on his face when he spots me still at the edge of the water with my clothes on.
He cups his hands around his mouth and shouts, “Plenty of room on this dock for you, too!”
“I’m good here!” I call back.
He smirks at me before diving into the water and popping up a few meters away from the dock, heading toward me. I back away from the water as he climbs out, walking over to me with droplets of water cascading down his muscled chest and through the contours of his abs. “What’s wrong? Scared you’ll lose in a race?”
“Psshhh, no.” I may be scared, but it’s not because of losing a race. It’s the fact he’s going to see more skin than he’s ever seen before. He only saw me in a swimsuit top at the beach the day he taught me how to surf. My arms wrap around my stomach, hiding it because it feels like he can already see through the tank top.
“If you’re not in the water within the next ten seconds, I’m making you jump in from the diving dock.” He points over to a wooden tower halfway around the lake and my eyes widen. “Your choice.”
I gaze back up at him, trying to determine how serious he’s being. When I realize he’s not joking, I swallow against the sudden dryness in my throat. I can do this, I chant in my head over and over again as I slowly untie the belt around my shorts, pulling them down my legs.
He watches every movement I make, his hands flexing at his sides.
When I grip the edge of my tank top, his eyes meet mine briefly before focusing back on my hands as I slowly pull the top up and over my head.
I open my mouth to say something but the distraction is just what I need to go running into the water, diving in and swimming as fast as I can to the floating dock.
I get a couple of feet away from it when I feel something grip my ankle. I squeal, my head going under the water as I’m pulled down. Coming up to the surface spluttering, I push the wet hair out of my face, searching around me and finding Nate standing on the dock.
“Uncle Nate won!” Izzie shouts, holding her fists up in the air and doing a little dance in celebration. Traitor.
I puff out a breath. “You cheated!” I accuse, pointing at him.
He shrugs. “Prove it.”
“You… you… ugh!” I slap my hands against the water, splashing myself in the face. “You don’t play fair, mister!”
He rolls his eyes and bends down, putting out his hand. “Since you’re such a sore loser, I’ll help you up.”
I keep a pout on my face as I slowly reach forward, placing my hand softly in his. “You can’t be a loser if the person against you cheated.” He grunts in response, but when he starts to pull me up, I throw my weight backward, pulling him back into the water and quickly yanking myself up onto the dock, jumping up and down. “Who’s the loser now?”
He swipes a hand through his wet hair, dispelling water droplets before scrubbing at his face. I’m not sure which one of us is more affected: him with being thrown into the water, or me watching as his biceps tense from the movement, making my mouth water.
“You’re so not getting away with that!”
I jump back, hiding behind the kids as he lifts himself up onto the dock and steps forward, his arms outstretched. “No!” I squeal, my stomach dipping as I run around the kids and he chases after me.
“Go, Uncle Nate!” Izzie shouts, which is followed by Clay saying, “Run, Amelia!”
I run across the dock as far as I can go—which isn’t far at all—but he catches me around the waist from behind, lifting me up off the wooden surface.
“Nate,” I warn.
He buries his face into the crook of my neck. “Gotcha now.”
“Throw her in!” I try to pull myself out of his grip when Izzie says that, whipping around to see the giant grin on her face.
My gaze connects with Clay’s as he stalks behind Izzie, his hand coming up to his lips to signal I keep quiet. My eyes widen as he wraps his arms around her waist and throws her in.
“Aaaah!” Her arms flail in the air beside her before there’s a big splash as she hits the water. Clay dives in after her, swimming over to her when she breaks the surface and leaving only me and Nate on the dock, his arms banded around me still, the muscles under his wet skin tensing against my back.
“Let me go,” I say, although what I really want to say is “pull me closer.”
I feel his breath skating across my ear as he whispers, “Never,” before jumping in with me in tow.
We hit the water, and as we go under, he still doesn’t let me go. I feel safe: safer than I’ve ever felt in my life knowing he won’t let me go.
I spin in his arms as we break the surface, coughing and spluttering but with a giant smile on my face. His eyes swirl with laughter but also something else I’m sure I’m imagining, but when they dip to my lips, I know I saw it.
Clay and Izzie’s shouts and laughter can be heard near us, but if they weren’t here, I have no doubt he would press his lips against mine, that he would pull me even closer—if that’s even possible.
My hand flutters up and over his arm to his forehead as I swipe some of his hair back. “I want nothing more than to kiss you right now,” I confess.
His gaze flits between my eyes before he looks behind us as we both tread water. The kids are happily heading back toward the sand and he looks backs at me. “Hold your breath on three.”
“Wh—”
“One, two, three.”
I do as he says, holding my breath and he pulls us down under the water. Both of our eyes are open and able to see each other through the clear blue water. His lips connect with mine in a soft, closed mouth kiss before he brings us back up, a smirk on his face.
I turn my head to check on the kids who are now sitting on the sand, Izzie with a towel wrapped around her shoulders.
“That was inventive,” I say, pulling back when his grip loosens on my waist.
“Just call me the dream maker,” he jokes cheesily.
“Chef and dream maker, huh?” I raise a brow but don’t give him the chance to answer as I slip under the water and start swimming back toward the sand, my arms stretching with each stroke.
He overtakes me just before we hit the shallow water, standing up first and heading over to where Clay and Izzie are. He grabs two towels, handing one to me when I walk up beside him.
“Thanks.”
Once I’m dry, I lay it down on the sand, sitting down and leaning back on my arms as I watch him move closer to the kids.
“Who wants to go canoeing?”
“Me!” both the kids shout at the same time, arms raised.
Nate turns toward me. “How about you?”
“I think I’ll sit here and watch,” I reply, relaxing back even more. “My tan needs a top up.” I smirk, but when his eyes trail over my body, I start to squirm.
“It looks fine to me, but as you wish.” He turns back to the kids. “Come on then, last one over to the boat shed is a rotten egg!”
They run ahead of him, their excited chatter surrounding them. I keep my eyes on them as they retrieve the canoes and head toward the water. He helps Izzie into the canoe before turning around and checking on Clay. He says something to him and then hops in behind Izzie.
I stare after them as they go farther onto the lake before lying down completely, closing my eyes and basking in the warmth of the sun hitting my skin.
I don’t know how long I lie there, but when a hand touches my shoulder, I startle, sitting up and nearly head-butting Nate.
“Nate,” I gasp, my heart hammering in my chest. “What are you doing?” I swing my gaze around, looking for Clay and Izzie, finding them sitting on towels to my left, the canoes nowhere in sight. “Did I fall asleep?” I ask, sheepish.
“You did.” He smirks. “I didn’t know you snored.”
“I do not snore.”
He raises a brow at me before addressing the kids. “She was snoring, right?”
“Yep,” Clay answers.
“Liars!” I point at Clay and then Nate. I place a mock angry look on my face as I stand up, swiping the towel off the sand and shaking it out before wrapping it around me.
“It’s okay that you snore like a wildebeest.” Both of the kids start laughing as I continue to scowl at Nate. “We can’t all be perfect.”
My eyes widen, staring at him with fire shooting from my eyes. “How dare you.” I reel my head back. “I do not sound like a wildebeest.” I step toward him, jabbing my finger in his stupidly hard chest. “I’ll have you know—”
“I’m hungry,” Izzie whines, cutting me off.
I tip my head back, staring up at Nate, letting him know I don’t appreciate him comparing me to an animal with horns.
He shoots me a wink before turning his attention to the kids. “How about we pack up here and go back to the main house? I can make us a snack and show you the new library, Clay.”
Clay nods emphatically. “What books have you got?”
I head over to Izzie, wrapping the towel around her body before we all head off the sand.
“I’ll let the books speak for themselves, but I will say there’s a few first editions in there,” Nate explains.
Clay’s eyes light up. “Really?” he asks, his voice high-pitched.
We make it back to the cart, but this time Clay sits up front with Nate and Izzie sits next to me, leaning against my side. Placing my arm around her shoulder, I pull her closer.
“Hold on tight, ladies,” Nate calls back to us as he starts the drive back.
Izzie giggles, but it’s not as raucous as it was when we first got to the lake. “You tired?”
“Mmmhmm,” she answers, her eyelids drooping. “I’m hungry, too.” She tilts her head back, looking up at me, her blue eyes smiling at me. “Do you think Uncle Nate will make me pancakes?”
I laugh. This girl and pancakes. “I don’t know,” I tell her as we come to the end of the trail and back to the house. “You’ll have to ask him, he may not have the chocolate sauce though.”
She blows out a breath. “He better.”
I shake my head at her as she battles to keep her eyes open.
When Nate comes to a stop, he hops out and heads toward us as Clay goes inside.
“Would the little princess like a carry? You look tired.”
Izzie nods, holding her arms up. Nate picks her up, his eyes flitting between Izzie and me.
“We need to feed her quick before she drops off.”
“I’m on it,” he states, saluting me and motioning for me to follow him.
We walk over the patio and into the kitchen where Clay is sitting at the wooden island; Nate places Izzie down on the stool next to Clay and walks over to his refrigerator. I sit down next to Izzie letting her rest her head on my shoulder, running my fingers through her damp hair.
I watch as Nate pulls out ingredients before turning toward me. “Sandwiches okay?”
“I want pancakes,” Izzie whispers. Even her voice is tired.
“It’ll take Uncle Nate too long to make pancakes, Izzie.” I look down at her. “If you have a sandwich then you could go and have a little nap sooner.”
Her eyelids droop again before she tilts her head a little. “’Kay.”
When I turn back to face Nate he’s already making the sandwiches, moving with ease around his kitchen. You can tell he uses it all the time. His hands are sure as they grip the end of the knife, and I watch fascinated at the way his muscles ripple with each movement.
They don’t stray off him as he walks over, placing plates in front of each of us before taking a seat next to me.
Flutters dance in my stomach as he grins at me and picks up his food, taking a bite. Everything he does is enthralling.
We all eat in relative silence, Izzie able to manage half of hers before she slumps forward.
Taking the last bite of his sandwich, Nate slides off his stool and picks Izzie up like a baby, cradling her in his arms. “I think you need a nap, little Isabel.” He looks up from her at me. “I’ll be back in a minute, I’ll put her in the nearest guest room.”
“Okay,” I reply, staring after them as he walks through the door.
As soon as they’ve gone, Clay jumps down, taking his empty plate to the sink. “I’m going to find the library,” he tells me, not giving me time to answer as he disappears.
I stare out of the window for a while before standing up and clearing the plates away, about to wash them.
“You look good standing in my house.”
I spin around, seeing Nate leaning against the doorjamb. My throat clogs with emotion and it takes me several attempts before I manage to whisper, “I love your house, it feels like...” I hesitate, not sure if I should say it or not but ultimately decide I want to be honest with him about how I’m feeling. “Home.”
“Play your cards right and you could be spending a lot more time here,” he says, straightening up and moving toward me. He doesn’t stop until our bodies are touching and he’s pinning me with his hips against the counter. My breath catches, his hands wandering up my arms and stopping on either side of my neck as he dips forward, coming to a complete stop a hairsbreadth away from my lips.
“I’ve been waiting all day to do this,” he breathes out before he slams his lips against mine.
Me too, I think, moaning when his teeth sink into my bottom lip.
Wrapping my arms around his neck, I pull him closer, lifting my chest up and relishing in the feel of him pressed against me. His hand threads through my hair, tugging slightly as a groan vibrates out of him, spurring me on even more.
Heat builds between my thighs, a slow burn turning into a roaring flame as I feel his hardness press against me at the same time his tongue runs alongside mine. His hand slides between us, undoing the knot I put in the towel at the lake and causing it to drop.
“Nate.” I throw my head back as his hand spans the side of my waist, his thumb rubbing back and forth underneath my breast. My chest heaves, wanting him to move his hands a little higher as he plants kisses down my neck and back up to my mouth.
I get lost in him, in all of the sensations. I need more of him, I need him everywhere, but when a bang comes from somewhere in the house, I pull back.
It’s too easy to become adrift when he’s near, forgetting what and who are around.
Taking a step away from me, he swipes his hand through his hair and down his face, staring at me for a beat as he tilts his head to the side.
“I…” He stops what he’s saying, inhaling deeply. “I’m glad you brought the kids today.” His throat bobs on a swallow. “I’m glad you came.”
I want to tell him I’m glad too, I never want to leave. I feel safe here: protected. My heart is running ahead of my brain, screaming at me to tell him, but my brain is being the logical one, demanding I keep my mouth shut.
The problem is as soon as my brain comes into the equation, it reminds me of everything happening outside of his house. Prompting me to recall the reason we came here in the first place: the latest package.
It’s one thing receiving them, but to know someone has been in your personal space has the safe sanctuary of your home destroyed.
I try my hardest to shake my thoughts from my head and concentrate on him, but now they’re there, I can’t move them. For several hours I forgot about it all, but now it’s an impossible task.
Blowing out a breath, I lean against the counter, pulling my lips up into a fake smile as I make my gaze meet his.
“Me too.”
Fake it until you make it, right?
After Amelia and the kids left yesterday, I couldn’t help missing her. Sneaking around could be fun, but I don’t want to hide her. I want to shout out to the world that this beautiful woman has taken notice of me and thinks I’m a complete and utter goofball, yet still wants to be with me anyway.
That had me thinking as I was sitting on my patio—alone—maybe if Tris and I mended our friendship then maybe Amelia wouldn’t mind us telling him we want to be together?
So I pulled out my cell and messaged Tris, asking if he wanted to grab a drink. It was time I did since he hadn’t contacted me since I set him and Harmony up on a lunch date, so to speak. He didn’t message back for a few hours but when he did, he said he was busy.
He had every right to be pissed but it had been almost two weeks since I set him up with Harmony, so I messaged back telling him he was being an asshole. I don’t sugarcoat things when they need to be said.
He didn’t reply until half an hour ago when I received a message asking if I was free. I thought I was seeing things, but here I am at Gillies, sitting in one of the booths to give us a little more privacy, waiting to see if he’ll actually turn up or stand me up like I’m expecting him to.
I watch the door, my eyes widening as he walks in, scanning the room for me. I wave and he smiles—smiles?
He slides into the booth, taking the beer bottle I offer him. “Thanks.”
“What’s gotten into you?” I ask him, awestruck.
He shrugs, his lips lifting up even higher. “Life’s good.” He looks me in the eyes, the gray darkening as his chest heaves on a breath. “But I’ve been an asshole lately, Nate.” He grabs the back of his neck. “I was so mad at you for setting me and Harmony up at the restaurant.” He shakes his head. “But it just so happened to be one of the best things to happen to me in a long time.”
My mouth opens and closes like a fish for a few seconds as I collect myself, not believing everything he’s saying. “So I got it right for once?”
He nods, sitting back in the booth and relaxing, his fingers peeling away the label on the bottle. “We actually went out on a date last night.”
“And?”
He grins. “I can’t believe how much she’s not changed: she’s still her. You obviously know she’s been through a divorce with her douchey husband, but she’s not let it change her.” He pauses and I wait, listening as he stares down at his hands around the beer bottle. “It’s great; everything is going perfectly, but… I’m terrified.”
“Understandable.”
“No.” He shakes his head. “It’s stupid yet I can’t help it. It’s like my brain is taking forever to catch up to every other part of my body.” His chest lifts on a deep breath. “It’s still screaming for me to run before something bad happens.”
I don’t know what to make of Tris’s sudden emotion sharing, he’s never done this with me apart from the day of Natalia’s funeral.
The coffin containing Natalia, my cousin and my best friend’s wife, is lowered into the ground. A sob escapes my mom’s mouth but she covers it up with a Kleenex as my dad throws an arm around her shoulder and pulls her into him.
I try to gulp past the giant lump in my throat as tears fill my eyes. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry today, I wanted to be strong for Tris but it feels like my insides are being torn out. Natalia wasn’t only my cousin, she was one of my best friends, we’ve been close ever since we were toddlers. My aunt Harrietta gave birth just two months after my mom so we grew up together, but look at where we are now. I’m at Natalia’s funeral and where are her mom and dad? Not here, that’s for sure.
Life isn’t fucking fair, she was only twenty-six years old.
My gaze falls on the tiny bundle lying in Tris’s arms, soundly asleep. She has no idea she’ll grow up without a mom, but the three-year-old clinging to his leg does. He only had her around for the three short years he’s been alive, but she was the best mom. He’ll remember her, for now, and miss her when she’s not around even if he’s not quite grasped onto what’s happened yet. I know because he keeps asking when his mommy is getting back from heaven and it breaks my heart each and every time we have to tell him she’s not.
My gaze wanders up to Tris’s face that’s as stoic and emotionless as it has been since I first saw him at the hospital after we got the call. A shiver rolls through me at the short memory before my dad is tapping me on the arm to tell me the service is over.
I don’t move, staying behind when Charlotte takes the kids from Tris. I’m surprised when he lets her because he hasn’t let them out of his sight. I’m aware he probably wants to be alone and I’ll let him have time in a moment, I just want to make sure he’s alright.
I clear my throat and walk up to the grave, standing next to him. “Beautiful service.”
Beautiful service? What a stupid thing to say!
He nods once, the creases on his forehead pulling down as his face crumples and he loses it, dropping to his knees, the dirt soaking into his pants. “Why?” His palms slap against the ground. “Why her? Can life not give me a fucking break!”
I kneel in the dirt beside him, raw emotion pouring out of both of us as I wrap him up in a hug that has us both sobbing against each other’s shoulders.
“She was healthy and had her whole life ahead of her.” He makes a noise in the back of his throat. “It’s not fucking fair, Nate. It’s not fair.”
“I know,” I choke out.
He pulls back, tears streaming down his face. “I’ve gone over and over that day time and time again. She knew there was something wrong: I could see it in her eyes when she stared at me.” A sob breaks free, his voice quivering. “They should’ve been able to help her.” I nod, wiping at my eyes. I’m in pain, but he was there when it happened. I can’t imagine ever watching the one you love fade before your eyes. “It’s all my fault.”
My head snaps toward him. “No, Tris. This—”
“YES… it is my fault. This is my punishment.” He scrubs his hands down his face. “This is what happens when you destroy someone good and don’t look back; fate intervenes and teaches you a lesson.” I know what he’s talking about but he’s being ridiculous. The determination on his face is enough to stop me from saying anything though: there’ll be no talking him out of this one. He’s grieving and he’ll soon see this is just one of those tragic things that happens. “Twenty-six years old and I’m already a widower and a single father to two children that never really got to know their mom.”
“Tris?” He turns his head to look at me through his bloodshot, teary eyes. “We’re all here to help.”
Looking away, I can tell he’s not really listening now. “I know.”
He gazes at the grave and wipes underneath his eyes before standing up and offering me his hand. I take it and he pulls me up before walking off toward the waiting town car.
“It’s okay to be scared, Tris. But you can lean on us,” I call out to him.
He turns around, holding his arms out wide, the expression on his face void of any emotion just like it was during the service. It’s not that that makes me stop dead in my tracks though; it’s the way he holds conviction in his words as he says, “I’m still standing, I don’t need to lean on anyone,” before turning around and climbing into the car.
It drives off and I slide my hands into my pockets, swallowing down a day’s worth of emotion. I feel like I’ve not only lost my cousin, but also my best friend.
A small sliver of guilt slips in my conscience as I think about setting up Tris and Harm. I know Natalia would forgive me instantly and want Tris to be happy, but the guilt is still there nonetheless.
“I can’t say nothing bad will happen…” His head snaps up from the beer bottle he’s been staring at. “But I can say that you deserve to be happy again. You’re allowed to be scared, that’s completely normal. Just don’t let it get in the way of your happiness.”
He watches me for several moments, seeming to decide whether what I’m saying is true. “You’re right,” he finally says, sliding out of the booth before pointing at my beer. “Want another?”
“How about something stronger?” I ask, grinning.
His brow raises before he grins along with me. “Something stronger coming up. Go set up one of the tables.”
I take a minute to process the change in Tris. We’ve been out to Gillies hundreds of times since Natalia passed away, and yet it’s never been like this. It’s always stilted conversation and half-hearted pool playing. And even then he normally comes up with an excuse as to why he has to leave after two drinks. This is new territory for us.
I climb out of the booth and find a free pool table, setting up and chalking up the cues as Tris comes walking over. He hands me a shot and a tumbler of whiskey. “Bottoms up.”
I down the shot, clearing my throat against the burn and watching Tris do the same. “What the fuck was that?”
He shrugs. “No idea, a girl at the bar said it was ‘so awesome’ so I got us two.”
I snort as he does his best barely legal, girl voice. “Yeah? That all she said?”
He rolls his eyes and points at the table. “You break, I’m a little rusty.”
I line up my shot and manage to pot a ball. “Stripes.” Taking my second shot, I miss and step back from the table.
He lines up his. “So, Izzie said Amelia took her and Clay to your place yesterday.”
I freeze up for a second wondering where he’s going with this. “Yeah, the kids were bored or should I say Izzie was bored.” He chuckles knowing how hyperactive Izzie is. “I’ve mentioned to Amelia in passing that I’ve been wanting to bring them out there because there’s loads to do. I guess she thought it was a good idea and I was free.”
“The kids said they had fun.”
“They did.” I smile thinking about yesterday. “I’d love to have them more often.”
His face falls as he stands up straight. “I’ve been a shitty friend as well as an asshole lately. I’m sorry, Nate. I should’ve invited you over or asked if you wanted to see them more. I just… it’s been hard.”
“I know.”
“No.” He chuckles. “You don’t and that’s the problem. I’ve been in my own head thinking everyone else is moving on with their own lives while I’m stuck back here in my misery. I’m angry at life, so fucking angry sometimes I take it out on the people that have tried to be there for me.” He pauses so I take my shot as I wait for him to figure out what he wants to say. I don’t want to interrupt him in case he clamps up again. “I’m going to try and be better, I just need time.” At the look I give him, he says, “Yeah, I know I’ve had six years. But I mean some real time. Time to heal properly now my eyes have been opened to the way things have been. I know I can be happy again if I let myself.”
I smile and grasp him on the shoulder. “You don’t know how good it feels to hear those words, so don’t wimp out on me.”
He pushes me away, his eyes lighting up with laughter. “Fuck you.”
I laugh, knowing that’s his way of showing affection right now.
I can’t remember much from the time we finished playing pool—I won of course—to the time my work alarm screamed in my ear.
Drinking on a work night is not big, nor is it clever. But damn it was fun.
I stare down at the message Nate sent me, my teeth sinking into my bottom lip before I look up. Charlotte’s studio sits next to her house, the large window with dark woodwork letting the light into the reception area.
Going out on a second date feels like a big deal; especially as he’s cooking at his house for us. Coming into the city to see if Charlotte can help with an outfit was a spur of the moment thing, but now I’m here I’m second-guessing myself.
Maybe I should wear some of my normal clothes? Nate doesn’t seem to care what I look like or what I wear. But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to feel good and look nice.
My hand reaches out, pushing the door open into the reception area. My small boot heels tap against the light wooden floor as I make my way around the large, black sofa, throw cushions scattered along it.
Coming to a stop at the white, streamlined desk, I tap the small bell sitting on top of it.
Sewing machines whir in the next room over and when I lean to the left to see through the door that sits ajar, I get a whiff of fig leaf and elderberry candle.
Heels tap, sounding closer before the door opens fully and Charlotte’s face appears.
“Amelia?” Her brows draw down into a frown. “Is everything okay? The kids? Tristan?”
My eyes widen. “Yeah, they’re all fine,” I rush out and her face relaxes before she takes another step toward me. “Apart from Tris’s hangover.” I smirk as I think back to this morning.
“Never again,” I hear Tris groan as he pushes through the kitchen door.
Turning around, I offer him a small smile, lifting my hands out of the soapy water, the suds dripping down my arm.
“Sore head?” I ask, knowing from the way he’s wincing from my voice and the sunlight that I’m right.
He shuffles across the floor, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips and his t-shirt on inside out. Pulling out one of the kitchen chairs, he drops into it, laying his head on the table.
Wiping my hands dry, I open up the refrigerator and pull out a packet of bacon, placing a few rashers on the grill before whisking up some eggs.
With every small noise I make, Tris moans and groans.
“Self-inflicted,” I singsong.
He grunts in response as I turn the bacon over and scramble the eggs on the stove before plating them up and pouring him a glass of orange juice.
Placing them in front of him before patting his shoulder, I tell him, “Eat up, you’ll feel better after you have.”
I sit opposite him, watching as he lifts his head, his murky-gray eyes connecting with mine.
“My head hurts.”
I chuckle as he picks up his fork, his movements slow. “That’s what happens when you drink enough for ten people.”
Shaking the thoughts from my head, I focus back on Charlotte. “What can I do for you then?”
“I erm, I…” I roll my eyes at my stuttered reply. “I wanted to ask for your help.”
Tilting her head to the side, her bobbed hair sways with the movement. “Okay.”
I wrap my arms around my waist, shuffling on the spot as I look around the room, trying to focus on one thing.
“I have a date and I need help choosing an outfit.”
“You have a date?” When I bring my gaze back to hers, I see a huge smile on her face.
“I do.”
She reaches her hand out, laying it on my forearm. “Can I ask who the lucky guy is?”
I was afraid she’d ask. I just don’t know how to answer. There’s no way I can be honest because Charlotte will for sure tell Tristan or even Edward.
“I…”
Pulling away, she waves her hand in the air. “Don’t mind me, I’m being nosy.” I laugh awkwardly before she spins around, heading back the way she came. “Follow me, I have the perfect outfit. It’ll look amazing on you.”
“You do?” Stepping after her, we walk through a room housing six tables, all with machines on top and people sitting or standing behind them, sewing or cutting material.
None of them look up as we walk through and into a room toward the back. “If you’re busy, I can come back,” I tell her, seeing how focused on their work they all are.
“Don’t be silly.” She points to a pink velvet chair off to the side. “Sit.” I go to it automatically, my gaze roving around this room.
Shelves housing heels and boots line the top and bottom of the walls with rails in between, dresses, jumpsuits, and several other things hanging from them.
Charlotte heads over to the one on the left, picking out a white jumpsuit as she hums a tune and reaches above it for a pair of black heels.
Pulling a curtain aside, she places them inside before indicating to me. “Try them on.”
Standing up slowly, I stare at her in bewilderment. How can she know exactly which outfit to choose for me?
I stay silent, not voicing what is running around in my head before I step inside the fitting room, a smaller chair the same as the pink one sitting in the corner and every wall hung with a full-length mirror.
“I’ll wait out here,” s says, pulling the curtain closed.
Getting rid of my clothes, I pull on the white jumpsuit, doing the side zip up and looking into the mirror.
A deep V plunges into my cleavage, covered with a lighter mesh fabric, the white material clinging to my waist and hips before it tapers down to fit my legs and stops just above my ankles.
My bra shows beneath the plunging V. It’s understated sexy, and even though this is something I would never wear, I feel beautiful in it.
Sitting on the chair, I push my feet into the heels, doing the buckles up at the side. Two wide straps slide over the top of my foot, one with a metal V embellishment. They’re higher than anything I’d normally wear because I favor Converse, or flat sandals, or small-heeled boots. But I can’t deny how they make my legs look longer.
“Well?” Charlotte’s voice comes from behind the curtain, and I take a deep breath before stepping out and showing her what it looks like. “I knew it!” She fist bumps the air, her eyes sparkling and her lips lifted into a grin. “As soon as this was made a week ago, I could see you in it.
“You could?”
“Mmmhmm.” She pulls on my arm, bringing me closer and messing with the fabric at my waist and hips. “It needs taking in a little here.” She pulls at the top of the middle of my back before spinning me around to look in the only other mirror in this large room. “See? Maybe an inch, but it’ll make all the difference.” When she lets it go, I can see what she means.
“It’s so beautiful,” I murmur, not quite believing how I look in this jumpsuit. I have no doubt in my mind that Nate won’t be able to take his eyes off me. At least, I hope he won’t.
“It is,” Charlotte whispers, meeting my gaze in the mirror. “But so are you.”
I swallow audibly. Having a mother figure is something I’ve missed over the last six years.
“Thank you,” I finally manage to whisper, pushing back the tears threatening to fall.
Charlotte rubs her hand up and down my back before stepping away. “I’ll grab some pins.”
“Okay.”
She flits out of the room, leaving me standing in front of the mirror, staring at my reflection and wondering if what stares back at me is the truth. The woman in the mirror looks happy, her chocolate eyes deep and shining bright.
“Let’s get this pinned and taken in for you.”
I jump at the sound of Charlotte’s voice, nodding as she steps forward and pulls the fabric, pinning it before stepping back and saying, “Take it off and we can grab some lunch while I get Vanessa to take it in.”
“Oh, no. You’re okay, I can wait.”
“Nonsense.” She waves her hand again in the way she does to dismiss things.
I head back into the fitting room, pulling the jumpsuit off carefully and putting my own clothes back on before heading back out with it draped over my arm.
“How much do I owe you?” I ask when Charlotte has dropped it off at one of the sewing stations.
“What?”
She opens another door, grabbing her purse and tilting her head for me to follow her.
“For the jumpsuit and heels.”
She leads me back into the reception area, frowning as she pulls open the door to lead us onto the sidewalk.
“I don’t expect you to pay for them,” she scoffs. “Give me some gossip about Tris and the kids and we’ll call it square.”
I chuckle, walking beside her, heading into the busier part of the city. “Well, Tris got drunk last night.”
“He did?”
“Yep.” I nod my head. “But it was a good kind of drunk. I think things are finally looking up for him.”
Charlotte looks at me, her face a mask of pure joy before she says, “It’s about time.”
I couldn’t agree more.