The morning my life changed forever, there was no warning, no omen, no signs of the dark events on the horizon. I woke up to a bright, sunny bedroom and two puppies happily licking my face. I groaned and wiped off my now sticky face. They were ready get out of bed, and that meant I was, too, whether I liked it or not.
I rolled out of the bed and landed on my feet. My two wards for the weekend wagged their little tails, eager for me to let them off the bed so that they could run free. Luckily for me, they were too small to jump off themselves, otherwise I could see them getting into trouble during the night. I was too soft-hearted to lock them in their kennel and listen to them cry until they went to sleep at night.
I stretched out my back and followed them as they ran ahead of me to the kitchen. I couldn’t help but grin as I watched them slipping, sliding, and scrambling to be the first one to the door. Their excitement was infectious. It was impossible to be grumpy when those two little guys were so joyful at the simple fact that the sun had come up for another day.
When I opened the back patio door, they gleefully bounded out into the fenced in backyard, ready to explore. I was not ready for my day to start just yet. Coffee was needed. I made my first cup like a zombie and brought it out to the patio so I could watch the puppies. I started to come to life as the scent of coffee drifted up to me, and I wrapped my hands around the mug, blowing gently on the top so I could get it cool enough to drink.
Kelsey was coming back into town later tonight. I needed to tidy up her house and give her puppies a bath before being relieved of my housesitting duties. I honestly looked forward to the weekends she went out of town, whether it be for business or her man of the month. She had an awesome house two blocks from the beach, two adorable little shih Tzu puppies going on 8 months old, and a fenced in backyard to provide entertainment for them.
I inhaled the delicious aroma as I brought my mug up for the first sip of the day. I also had lunch planned with Evelyn today after she got back from church. My plan for this morning was to take the pups for a walk on the beach to tire them out so I would be able to escape the house for a couple hours this afternoon while they napped.
Barking caught my attention, and I looked up to see the puppies had chased something up a tree and were intent on getting it to come back down. Since they were finished doing their business for the morning, I decided to call them back in.
I leaned out the door and glanced around to see if anyone was within hearing range, then winced before I shouted, “Tigger! Eeyore! Breakfast time!” Yes, Kelsey had named her pups Tigger and Eeyore, which is why I referred to them most of the time as “the puppies” or “the pups.” It could be worse; she could have gone with Piglet.
Eeyore could be as serious as his namesake sometimes, but he was very smart and would stop and think before jumping into anything new. He had a pure black coat and dark eyes that added to his sometimes somber appearance. Tigger, on the other hand, was always happily bouncing from place to place and had a white and gold coat. He wasn’t as cautious as Eeyore and had to be watched more closely so that he didn’t get in trouble.
The morning flew by, and by noon I had the house cleaned, the puppies fed, walked, bathed and tired out. They settled down in their kennel for a nap, and I picked up the baked mac and cheese I was bringing as my contribution to our weekly Sunday lunch.
Evelyn lived about 5 minutes away from Kelsey, which is another reason I did not mind housesitting for her. If I wasn’t staying at Kelsey’s, it would have been a good 45 min drive for me. As much as I loved the idea of living at the beach, I opted to live close to my job instead.
I think Evelyn was pleased with that decision as well. She didn’t bring it up often, but she was still worried about her past coming back to haunt her, even though her dark past was almost 40 years ago. She had sat me down for a serious discussion about it only once in the 16 years that I have known her. I thought about the last time we had “the talk” back when I was about to graduate high school and head out into the world.
I knocked on the door and let myself in as usual. “Evelyn, I’m here!” I called out.
Her voice floated out to me. “In the sitting room, dear.” She didn’t have a living room, she had a “sitting room” or “parlor” and would frown at me if I dared to suggest it was a living room.
I slunk down the hall and to the right. Today had not been a good day for my uncle, and he was in rare form. After one of his episodes, I had a difficult time standing up straight or meeting anyone’s eyes, preferring to lurk in the shadows unseen.
Evelyn’s warm smile greeted me, but I could tell she had a serious look in her eye. She sat on the sofa in front of a coffee table covered in pictures. She waved me forward when I hesitated in the doorway and gave a sad sigh when she took in my current state.
She knew better than to try to hug me, as we had been through this before. I preferred to pretend nothing had happened, and she was resigned to the fact that she could do absolutely nothing about it. Her very life depended on her staying unnoticed and anonymous. Making accusations against a well-liked and respected police officer would drag her out in the public eye and catch the attention of some dangerous people.
She patted the sofa next to her, and I gingerly sat down on the edge of the seat and leaned forward to see what she was doing with the pictures. She never had any pictures of family before and rarely mentioned her daughter. I looked up at her and saw her gazing sadly down at the pictures.
She picked one up of a sad looking girl who was about my age. “This was me,” she said softly. “I printed these out at the local library. Did you know that they have high school yearbooks on the Internet now?”
“Hmmm.” I had the feeling that if I stayed quiet and didn’t interrupt, she might continue. Evelyn had never opened the door to her past before, and I was eager to see what I could before that door slammed shut again.
She picked up other photos one by one. There were some that looked more recent, maybe from the eighties or nineties? They were posed photos taken of different high school clubs, but all had one girl in common. I’m guessing that was her daughter. She didn’t say anything as she gazed at the pictures with a sense of nostalgia, and it was killing me not to ask any questions.
I finally blurted out, “Are these of your family? That’s great that you were able to find those-”
She cut me off immediately with a sharp look in her eye. “It’s not great, it’s dangerous.” She swept all the photos up into her arms and stalked over to the fireplace. “I wanted to show you these to warn you. You might think you are safe in hiding, but you are not. You are never safe….” She trailed off and leaned against the fireplace, with exhaustion coming on just as quickly as the burst of energy that had carried her over there. She tossed her stack of papers and photos into the unlit fireplace.
“I like to think that I left it all behind me,” she started, then paused. She turned and headed back towards the sofa, taking a seat and leaning back. “This is just one reminder that anyone can come for me at any time. If the wolves find me, they CANNOT know about you. They will take you, and your life now will seem pleasant in comparison.”
A chill ran through me at the look in her eyes. “There’s no way anyone could recognize you from those pictures, Evelyn. You look so different now-”
“The pack would know,” she told me adamantly. “They always know more than you could possibly imagine.” I was doubtful that high school photos of Evelyn and her daughter could lead anyone here to where she was hiding under a different identity, but I knew better than to mention it to Evelyn when she was in one of her paranoid moods.
“I haven’t mentioned this before because I did not want to scare you more than I have to.” Evelyn paused and appeared to be considering her words carefully. “Female wolves are becoming rare and are considered valuable by most packs. Human females have a difficult time conceiving and carrying wolves. It’s rare that a human female gives birth to a healthy baby that was conceived by a male wolf. It’s even more rare that the baby is a full-blooded wolf. Some of those children never turn.” She took a deep breath. “I didn’t.” Shock hit me like a punch to the stomach. Evelyn was half-wolf?
She continued, oblivious to my shock. “The males are put out of the pack if they don’t turn, but the females are kept to bear the next generation. My pack thought that they could gradually breed the human part back out of the line. My daughter would have been 75% wolf, and her daughter even more. The pack did not consider this to be optional for the females, even though the risk of death was high for females with even a small amount of human blood. They make examples out of those who try to run to keep the rest in line…”
I was horrified, and a wave of nausea hit me. This is what must have kept Evelyn in hiding all these years. I swallowed nervously, not wanting to ask but still wanting to know. “Your daughter?” I said softly.
“Yes, she only made it 5 months along,” she replied with tears in her eyes. She grasped both of my hands in a shockingly strong grip. “You have to promise me, if anyone suspicious comes around asking questions, or if anything happens to me – you run. You don’t look back, you don’t try to help, you just run.”
I couldn’t meet her eyes, trying to form words to communicate the fear, sadness, and compassion that I felt for her and what she must have gone through. She gave my hands another squeeze. “Promise me!”
I have never heard Evelyn raise her voice to me. I was shocked enough to look up into her eyes to see desperation there. “I made it through what happened to me, I made it through what happened to my daughter, but I can’t…” Her voice broke, and a tear slowly started down her cheek.
“The only way I can go to my end peacefully is to know that you will be safe. Don’t make an old lady give up her peaceful afterlife to haunt you.” A small grin quirked the corner of her mouth up as she tried to inject some humor and lighten the mood.
My throat closed as I tried to speak. I couldn’t imagine a world without Evelyn in it. She has been a constant, steady presence in my life since she found me at 10 years old. I had been covered in dirt, naked in her garden, and completely confused about what was happening to me. I had just changed back to human after my first experience as a wolf. She had guided and supported me through so much the last 8 years that I couldn’t imagine my life without her.
Almost as if following my thoughts, she added, “I have already lived multiple lives. You are just starting on yours.”
The emotion was just too much for my teenage self to handle, and I buried my face in my hands and broke down into sobs. She gently patted my hand. “Know that anything I do is always in your best interest.”
My wracking sobs slowly calmed into hiccups. I wiped my eyes and looked up at her. “I…”
“I know this was too much to put on you right now, but there is never a good time to have a discussion like that.” She got to her feet and gestured for me to do the same.
“Let’s get you cleaned up. I need help making sugar cookies for my bible study.”
The discussion was over, and we never spoke of it again. But there were times when she would get a sad look in her eye when commenting on how I was growing up into a young lady, and I could tell she was thinking of her daughter.
Evelyn was a sweet older woman who I had met during my very difficult and confusing transition. She was not a wolf herself, but she had grown up as human intertwined in a wolf pack - and not in a good way. She recognized me for what I was and guided me in getting control over the shifts and my wolf.
It was a difficult process. Evelyn’s experience was limited to watching a few other wolves come of age and transition; she had never experienced any of it herself. She imparted all the wisdom and guidance that she could over the years, and as I got older I realized just how lucky that I was to have her in my life.
From the way her pack had treated her, I would not have been surprised if she had wanted nothing to do with another wolf for as long as she lived. It shows what a good soul that she has that she was willing to help a confused, potentially dangerous lone wolf.
What about my pack? I’ve never had one. I was adopted as a baby to a couple who had no idea what I was. When I was 8, they were killed in a car crash and I was sent to live with my adopted uncle and his family. I don’t have any memories of my life before I moved in with my uncle, and I don’t remember my parents at all.
My uncle was not pleased at all to be saddled with another kid. He already had 3 of his own and barely tolerated them. But he was a police officer who wanted to move up in the ranks and become a pillar of the community, so throwing me out into the streets was not an option. In public, he always put on a smile and spoke about how glad he was that I had come to stay with them. He would always make sure to tell people that I was the adopted daughter of his sister-in-law so that they would be impressed and tell him what a great and charitable man he was for taking me in.
Out of the public eye, it was a completely different story. I don’t like to dwell on the past, but one of the happiest days of my life was getting out of that house. The only bright spots of my childhood were when I would run over to Evelyn’s house. No one really cared if I disappeared for a few hours if my chores were done. Evelyn was always happy to see me. I think she thought of me as the granddaughter that had never been born.
I shook myself out of my nostalgia and picked up my bag, maneuvering to scoop up the mac and cheese on my way to the door. I headed out to the car, and after some more maneuvering I managed to make it into the car without dropping the food.
It was a short drive, so I had the windows down. The cool breeze blew through my hair, but I enjoyed the scent of the ocean that was carried on the wind. As I drove down the road, I could see peeks of the ocean between the houses that I drove past. How nice would it be to just walk out to the beach any time you wanted? I briefly fantasized about morning walks on the beach and late night dips in the ocean beneath the stars, anytime I wanted. I got a taste of it every month or so when I would housesit for Kelsey.
As I got closer to Evelyn’s house, I saw the flash of police lights. I had a brief thought about her neighbor, Mrs. Peterson, who had several children that tended to be accident prone. I had been called upon to patch them up or evaluate if they needed a trip to the emergency room quite a few times. I hoped all of them were OK…
Then I pulled up across the street and realized the cars were not just on the street, but also in Evelyn’s driveway. I panicked, thinking of all the things that could have happened while I was taking my sweet time getting here. Images flashed in my eyes as I ran up to the house. Did she fall on the stairs? Have a heart attack? She was healthy as far as I knew, but she was in her seventies. My heart was pounding as I reached the two men standing on her front steps.
They had been watching me coming with sharp and suspicious eyes. I stopped in front of them and pushed my mess of wavy blonde hair back. I stood up straight, trying to appear as though I was not a crazy person.
“Is Evelyn OK?” I asked with a catch in my breath.
Both the men eyed me, then looked at each other, almost seeming to have a silent conversation. The dark-haired man on the left shrugged and pulled a notepad and pen out of his back pocket. The man on the right with the salt and pepper hair and bit of a paunch to his belly squared his shoulders back as he spoke.
“Who are you, and what is your relationship to the d - to Miss Evelyn Heights?”
“I’m her friend! We were meeting here for lunch, she doesn’t have any family and she is an older woman who lives alone. I check on her sometimes and spend time with her because we were neighbors while I was growing up.” All of that came out in a rush, and I realized I was babbling.
He quirked an eyebrow, and I took a deep breath. Right. I need to sound less defensive and more assertive if I am going to get anything out of them. I raised my chin a little. “And who are you?”
“I’m sorry, ma’am. We should have introduced ourselves. I am Detective Finn, and this is Detective Myrtle” he gestured to his dark-haired companion with the notebook.
Detective Myrtle gave me a brief nod and went back to writing in the notebook.
“Detective Finn, I’m guessing that since there are two police detectives standing in front of Evelyn’s house...” My voice cracked, and I paused to take another deep, calming breath. Then I managed to continue. “...that something…bad has happened.” I tried to keep my composure, but my heart was pounding and a deep sense of dread was slowly filling me.
Detective Finn gave me a brief evaluating look. “Miss Heights was found this morning by her neighbor, who was picking her up for church. The circumstances are under investigation at this time, but I can tell you that she has passed.”
I stared at him in horror and disbelief.
Detective Finn had to have caught on to the storm of emotions that were raging inside of me. He gave me what I guess was supposed to be a comforting smile, but it came out as almost a grimace. “I know that this is difficult, but I am going to need to take down your info and have you come down to the station for a statement. I’m sure that as a friend of Miss Heights, you want to do everything you can to help with the investigation…”
His voice started to fade into just an indistinct blur, and a sense of numbness settled over me. His partner stepped in, and I robotically gave him my information as he wrote it down in the book.
“You live in Port Idris? Isn’t that a bit of a drive?” His question drew me out of my daze as I tried to process his words.
“I’m staying in Seaside this weekend, housesitting so I can take care of my friend’s dogs while she is out of town,” I mumbled.
Detective Finn’s eyes snapped to mine immediately. “What kind of dogs?”
I blinked, confused for a second as to why he would ask that. “Shih Tzus?” I replied, a question in my voice.
He seemed almost disappointed. “Those are small dogs, right?.”
“Yes.” I frowned. “They are about eight pounds now but will probably be fourteen or so when they are full grown.”
He lost interest again. Strange, why would…suddenly, it hit me. He was questioning me about dogs, but should he instead be asking about wolves? My heart started pounding again, panic chasing away the numbness.
His voice had faded out as I was consumed by my thoughts, but I tuned back in when he reached towards me to hand me a business card. “…give you a call when we need you to come in.” They both nodded at me and turned back to the front door. I could tell that I had been dismissed.
Another man in a full-on hazmat suite opened the front door. Both detectives stood up straight, giving him their full attention, and the three of them started to murmur quietly.
I started to back away, still in panic mode. Why would he need to be wearing a hazmat suit? I was horrified, and a small part of me thought that if I could just get out of here, this would all just go away. I could drive back down the street and come back to Evelyn’s house again. This time, she would be waiting me at the front door with a smile.
I almost bumped into a uniformed officer coming up the driveway. “If the detectives have your info, you are free to go,” he told me sternly. The three men in the doorway stopped their murmured conversation, remembering that I was there. They watched me head back down the driveway to my car before continuing their conversation and then going back into the house.
I climbed in the car and sat with my head pressed on the steering wheel. I tried to slow my breathing and get control of all the emotions running through my head. But maybe it wasn’t her? They could have made a mistake. If there were wolves involved…I swallowed, not wanting to create any mental imagery, but hope slowly started to fill my heart. Maybe…
I sharp knock on my window brought my head up immediately. Mrs. Peterson waved at me. I got out of the car and leaned on the car door to support my shaking legs.
Mrs. Peterson reached out for my hand. “Isn’t it so sad? I couldn’t believe it! I will never get the image of poor Mrs. Heights just lying there…”
“So, it was her?” I sharply interjected.
She looked at me with pity. “That’s right, dear, I forgot you were so close to her. It was definitely her.” She leaned in closer to me. “There are all kinds of rumors going around, though.”
I looked at her in disbelief for a moment. If she had come to pick Evelyn up for church, it would have been only hours ago that she was found. Why is there gossip about this already?
Wait, I should know better. I grew up in a small town, so I know how petty and callous people can be when it comes to gossip. I had always thought of Mrs. Peterson as one of the good ones, though. Not a gossipmonger. She had 3 boys, was a working mom and drove a minivan carpool to soccer practices for the team.
I guess I took too long to provide any additional rumors or gossip for her to spread around, because she straightened back up and sniffed. “I guess we should leave all that up to the police.”
“Yeah…” I responded as my mind ground through the facts that I had. She turned away and started to head up the street, where a small group of neighbors were straining their necks to see what was going on at Evelyn’s house.
“Mrs. Peterson!” I called out.
She turned halfway towards me reluctantly. Obviously, her heart was set on a more captive audience.
“When you found her, was she…I mean, do you think she suffered?” My voice cracked on the last word, and tears threatened to overwhelm the brief sense of calm that I managed to find.
Mrs. Peterson looked uncomfortable for a moment. “Well, I’m not sure I should say.”
She looked at me sympathetically. “I know she is in a better place now, dear. Whatever she went through in the past, I know she is happy now.” Mrs. Peterson turned back and hurried toward the group of neighbors who were now awaiting her arrival with rapt interest, no doubt to see if she had managed to get any more details out of me.
I got back in my car. I could not even catalogue all the emotions I was feeling right now. Guilt for not being there when she needed me, for not being able to protect her. Grief that I would never see her smile again. Angry that someone had taken her from me. Embarrassed at how selfish that I was for thinking of myself. What had she gone through? What was she thinking in her last moments? Sadness. Was she with her daughter now?
My mind went back to “the talk” we had eight years ago. Had she moved on, or was she hanging around as a spirit, waiting to see if I would follow her directions? She had wanted me to just run and not look back if something like this happened.
I didn’t want to run. I wanted to find who was responsible for this and rip them apart. If I was honest with myself, I wanted to find who was responsible for making her life miserable, for causing the death of her daughter, for making her run and live her life in fear.
I needed to do something other than sit here wallowing in my emotions. I couldn’t help Evelyn while she was alive, but I really had nothing left to lose now that she was gone. First things first, I needed to figure out who did this and if they were going to come after me next.
I needed to plan and be smart about this. If wolves were involved, I needed to get into the house to smell the crime scene. If I was in wolf form, I would be able to smell if there had been wolves there and I could catalogue their scents for later. If I ever came across those wolves again, I would know them by their scents.
I started up the car with a purpose. I needed to get into the house after the police are done but before they finished cleaning up any trace of what happened. My resolve started to slip and my horror at picturing what it was that happened caused nausea to come back up. I pushed away the images and tried to focus on my plan.
I checked the clock. Kelsey would be back in a couple hours. I had time to get back to her house, pack up the rest of my weekend stuff in my car and then take the pups out to the beach for a little while until she got back. They had just gotten a bath, but I needed to do something other than just sit and wait.