It Sinks In

Graham coming into the diner with another woman sucked.

What’s worse, though, is Graham not coming into the diner at all.

After the incident with Brooke, he doesn’t come back, with dates or without.

Maybe good ole Brooke reported back to the Comets that her “date” was more worried about my feelings than hers. If so, they probably decided it’s best to keep us away from each other.

As the next few weeks go by, it sinks in that Graham is out of my life for good this time.

Well, at least until after the playoffs, which the damn team makes it into, of course.

I watched the deciding game at my apartment, on the huge ultra hi-def TV I finally broke down and bought.

Hey, if I can’t see Graham in person, watching him on a giant screen in crystal clarity is the next best thing.

It was a good game, even though I kept vacillating between rooting for the Comets to win and maybe hoping a little bit that they’d lose. I mean, if the Comets hadn’t made it into the playoffs, Graham and I would be free to see each other again.

But they won the game, so the playoffs are a lock.

More time has been added to our sentence.

That’s what this feels like—a prison sentence.

And why are we being punished?

For falling in love?

That’s just wrong.

Oh well, it is what it is.

I just keep counting down the days to the playoffs, waiting for them to start…and for them to end.

First, though, there’s one more regular season game, and it’s the day after Christmas.

Ah, the holidays.

Another thing I’m torn up over.

I’m sad that I won’t get to spend Christmas and New Year’s with Graham, but I’m happy that Paul’s coming home.

One thing for sure—my brother’s bound to love the new TV. He can finally play video games on something where he doesn’t have to squint to see what he’s doing.

Continuing with my upgrade-our-electronics trend, the week before Christmas, on the day Paul’s due home, I buy him a brand-new Xbox.

That evening I wrap the new gift.

And then, because it’s snowing like hell outside, I snuggle down deep into a big fluffy blanket, waiting for my brother to walk through the door.

I offered to pick him up at school, but he has a new best friend, Tanner. The kid’s sixteen and drives, so Paul insisted on riding down with him.

Yeesh, they grow up so fast.

Soon Paul will be sixteen and driving too.

I sigh, though this time it’s contentedly. There’s comfort in knowing I’ll have the money to buy my brother something reliable and safe to tool around in. I know he was planning on taking over my beater, but I think we’ll keep with this upgrade trend and leave the old Saturn garaged up for nostalgic purposes.

Paul will love that. It means he’ll get to pick out a new car.

I’m really proud of my brother and his progress. He’s becoming more responsible every day. And he’s so damn conscientious, always thinking of others.

Like when I double-checked to make sure he didn’t need for me to pick him up at school, he said, “No, I can definitely ride down with Tanner. He has a big four-wheel drive so we’ll be safe. He’s also a good driver. But, above all that, it’s better for you.”

“How do you mean?” I asked, curious as to where this was going.

Paul, dead-serious, replied, “You won’t have to spend any money on gas this way.”

That cracked me up.

Laughing, I said, “Dude, those days are over. Need I remind you that we have plenty of cash now?”

I knew when he chuckled that I’d walked right into that one.

Sure enough, he countered, “Yeah? If that’s true, why haven’t you rented us a new apartment? Or better yet, buy us a nice house?”

I had to think fast on that one.

“Um, I’m waiting for spring. It’s easier to look for places in nicer weather.”

“Bullshit,” Paul rightly called. “You’re hoping to move back in with Graham.”

“Umm…”

I couldn’t deny that one.

Good thing Paul’s so supportive and understanding.

“That’s cool, sis,” he said softly. “I like his house too. And it fits you guys. Not too big, not too small, just right.”

“It is rather perfect, isn’t it?” I mused.

Paul chuckled. “It is. But one thing, sis. Doesn’t the team own that house?”

“Yeah, for now,” I confirmed with a sigh. “Though I’m sure they’d let Graham buy it from them, or work the purchase into his next contract somehow.”

That’s what we’re hoping for. But first we have to get to that point.

As I’m lounging around, pondering and reminiscing about that call, Paul arrives. He barely has a chance to walk in the door before I’m up and on him.

Practically tackling him and wrapping the kid up in a giant hug, I tell him, “Oh my God, I am so damn happy to see you.” I lean back and take him in. “You look great, by the way. You’ve grown at least two inches, I think.”

Paul shrugs. “I don’t know about that.”

“Well, I do,” I retort.

He is taller, making him lankier than ever. He looks good, though, healthy and happy. His pale green eyes are clear and bright, and there’s a contented glow about him.

I feel fantastic. This is the only gift I need for Christmas.

Well, being back together with Graham would be nice too.

That one will have to wait, though.

Paul steps back and drops his duffel bag to the floor.

Reaching out, he ruffles my hair playfully and tells me, “You’re goofy, sis. You act like you haven’t seen me in years.”

“It has been months,” I remind him.

As we head over to the sofa, he says, “Yeah, I guess you’re right. That old saying must be true then, huh?”

“Which one is that?” I inquire as we sit down at the same time.

Before he answers, he calls “Jinx!” and I push him away.

“Stop.” I laugh. “Now tell me, what saying is true?”

“Okay, okay. I’m talking about the one that says how time flies when you’re having fun.”

God, that makes me happy. It means Paul really does love his new school.

To be absolutely sure, I ask, “You really like it up there, don’t you?”

He nods. “I do. I feel like I’ve finally found my tribe.”

I’m so pleased to hear that that I let out a choked sob.

“Hey, what’s this all about?” Paul drapes an arm around me, comforting me. “There’s nothing to cry about. I just told you I love school.”

“I know,” I blather. “That’s why I’m crying. I never thought in a million years I’d ever hear you say that.”

Shaking his head, he says, “It is a little wild, huh? Me loving school, who would’ve thunk it. But I do. And it’s all thanks to you.” He sighs. “I’m just sorry you had to sell yourself to get the money.”

I twist to face him. “Hey, don’t say that.”

Looking solemn, he says, “It’s true, though, Eden. You once said it yourself.”

“In a way, yes, I did sell myself. But it turned out to be a good thing. Not only do we not have money troubles now, but I fell in love. Graham is a good man, Paul. He’s everything I’ve ever wanted and more.”

“He is pretty cool,” Paul agrees.

“I’m glad you like him. You know your opinion holds a lot of weight with me.”

“I know. I guess you could say then that you have my blessing.”

I burst out in laughter.

“What’s so funny?” he asks.

“It’s just that our dynamic is so messed up. I’m the older sibling. I should be giving you my blessing for things. I’m supposed to be looking out for you.”

“You do,” Paul replies. “But really, shouldn’t we both be looking out for each other?”

“Damn, you really have grown, in more ways than one. That school is making you wise, kiddo.”

He shrugs. “Maybe. There’s something else I’ve been thinking about too. And this one’s really going to blow your mind.”

“Uh-oh, I’m afraid to hear. What is it, little bro?”

Smiling big, he says, “This ‘little bro’ is going to walk you down the aisle and give you away when you and Graham get married.”

My heart skips a beat, both at the sentiment and at the thought of marrying Graham.

But my brother misreads my stunned expression.

“Wait, you want to marry him, right?”

Blowing out a breath, I say, “Yes, of course.”

“So what’s wrong, then?”

“Nothing.” I shake my head. “It’s just that your words really hit me. That’s all.”

“In what way?”

“They made me realize that I really do want to marry Graham. I love him. I love him a lot. And we should be in it for the long haul.”

Looking thoughtful, Paul says, “If that’s the case, then we definitely need to find a way for you to see him on Christmas.”

“Yeah,” I bite out, “good luck with that one. I wish.”

Sounding wiser than his years, and like he has something up his sleeve, Paul states, “Wishes are what Christmas is all about, big sis.”