The next morning, I wake up thinking the house is on fire. I quickly sit up, dazed and confused and sweetly sore from last night. I smile and breathe out when thinking back to last night. The way he held me and filled me and talked dirty, it made me feel perfectly sinned. I distinctly feel the caress of his fingers scoping for laughter as he tickled me, and the smoothness of his lips, like velvet, and sugary-sweet like cotton candy. I blush and bite my lip when remembering what those lips did to me afterward.
The house could be on fire and you’re daydreaming about last night?
I push the sheet off me and stand up. I stretch with a yawn and scoop up his shirt he wore last night. I pull it on and discreetly sniff his homey scent. I leave the room, blushing at my subconscious; that seems to be the only part of me left unaffected by Grey. I am honestly so thankful for it, because without it, I would be helpless against the man. And Lord knows how he can be—all-consuming. It’s good that I have a little sensibility left in me to keep a part of myself grounded while the rest of me is in the clouds.
As I am nearly exiting the hallway, I look into the kitchen and smile broadly, semi-blinded by the sexy sight. I lean against the wall and bite my lip, tilting my head. Grey is shirtless and standing in front of the stove, struggling to flip a burning piece of pancake. That’s why the house smells like burnt char. He’s cooking. I am too slow to hold back a laugh when he finally flips the pancake, but it goes splat on the ground. He looks up like a deer caught in headlights, a nervous smile crooked on his lips. His eyes look me up and down, lust forming in those black eyes of his.
“Morning, sexy.” His voice is thick with remnants of sleep.
My heart skips a step. “Morning,” I mumble shyly, tugging at the ends of the shirt that sits at my mid-thighs. I walk over to the kitchen island and hop onto one of the leather stools. He laughs as I struggle to get up for a brief moment. I glare at him, and he raises his hands defensively. “Need a little help with that?” I stare at the empty pan as he throws away the burned pancake on the ground.
“Absolutely not, I am a grown man. I don’t need little elves to help me.” He waves the spatula at me, and I stick my tongue out at him. He does the same, and I grin.
“First, I am not an elf.” I hop down from the chair, and he gives me a knowing smirk. I grunt at him and round the counter, bumping his hip and making him stumble to the side. “And second, I would like breakfast that isn’t as black as your eyes.”
“For your information.” He bounces into my hip, and I scowl at him. “My eyes are a unique dark brown.”
“Whatever helps you sleep at night,” I mumble, and he hits me with his hips again. “Stop doing that.”
He bends down to my height and coos, “Aw, is the little elf mad at me? Whatever shall I—hey, give that back!” I grab the spatula and run out of the kitchen just to spite him. I dodge him as he lunges for me in the living room and laugh like a maniac as I rush down the hallway into the bedroom.
“Not until you stop being an asshole!” I say and laugh harder when he almost slips and falls when entering the room. I hop onto the bed, then jump down and rush back into the kitchen when he jumps after me.
“I’m going to catch you eventually!” he shouts after me, but I just laugh.
I love this. Us playing around like nothing bad has ever happened. We are growing closer, slowly repairing what was broken. And I couldn’t be any more elated. I want us to stay this way without ever running into some obstacle. I know wishing for nothing bad to happen is childish and unlikely to come true, but in moments like this, I want the world to stop. I just want to pause the world, eliminate the gang and my mother, then press play and live in innocent bliss with the love of my life. Is that so wrong?
He finally catches me by my waist when I try to dash into the living room. “Caught you!” he announces, and I squeal as he sets me on the counter and grabs the spatula from me. “You are insane.” He shakes his head, smiling.
I lean forward and peck his lips. “Insane for you.”
“That you are.” He tips my chin up and pulls me in for a toe-curling, slow kiss. I revisit every single inch of his mouth and cup my hands around his neck, splaying my body against his. He wraps an arm around my waist and slowly slides a hand up, revealing my tender skin from last night. I gasp into his mouth when he grabs my butt, and memories from last night make me moan.
A vibration pulls him away too fast, too soon.
“Sorry, sorry…” He pulls his phone out as I try to catch my breath. He scowls at the phone and then at the ground as he puts it back in his basketball shorts.
“What’s wrong?” I pull him back in between my legs and cup his face, trying to meet his eyes.
He smiles as he looks up. “Nothing. Hey, I’m gonna have a few fights today in over the next town, but I’ll be back in the morning, maybe a little later. Okay?”
“Okay…” I say unsurely. I know there’s more to what he’s telling me. I know by the way his cheeks paled when he looked at his phone. He smiles wider and kisses me softly, almost like he’s hungry. I kiss him back and almost get lost in his lips. He pulls back.
“Shit! I almost forgot something.” He grips my thighs before jogging out of the kitchen and into the bedroom. I jump down and think he means his shirt, maybe his duffel bag, but then I freeze. He looked like he saw an angry ghost when he looked at his phone. Code word for a very pissed off Dean, who has gotten under his skin. And then I think of what’s in the room that he could have forgotten.
He comes back out wearing a dark grey Nike tank top and holding his black duffel bag.
“Got it. I’ll call you when I get the chance,” he promises, and I mumble a reply after he gives me a chaste kiss on the forehead.
I watch him leave, then wait a few seconds before going to the bedroom. I open the bedside table and sink into the bed, feeling tears coming rapidly. My worst nightmare has come true. The gun is gone. He took the damn gun.
***
I am frozen in front my parents’ beach house door. I am too afraid of what, or rather who, lies behind this door. I told myself I would never forgive my mother for acting un-mother-like toward me and physically assaulting me. I am not here for her. I am here for Grey’s charm.
I feel like I am slowly imploding. I have tried contacting Grey until my fingers have gone completely numb from all the typing. I need the charm; I know it will calm me down a tad because of what it represents: love, hope, and him. I need even the littlest of assurance or I won’t last until he arrives home. If he does.
I whimper at the sullen thought and wipe away a tear. I shouldn’t think like that. I have to be positive, so I wait by the door expectantly. He will come back to me in one piece, and I will throw the damned weapon in the ocean. I’m not allowing him to be taken away from me in a violent way like that. There is just no way.
I press the doorbell since I forgot my key. My mind is in a complete fog by this point. I wipe away any extra tears. I don’t want her to see me so weak. I inhale and hold it, preparing myself. When she opens the door, I am just going to barge past her and into my room. I will take what is mine and leave without even opening my mouth. Yes, that is the plan. Not the best or nicest plan, but it will let me leave unscathed by my mother.
I am completely thrown off when the door opens. “Mason?” I question, feeling tears prick my eyes.
His brown eyes blow wide open, and he makes a little strangled sound. “Hey…” He didn’t expect this either. It has been so long since I last saw him. We left things so shattered, so terrible…it hurts to look at his overgrown hair and little stubble on his kind of chubby cheeks.
“What…what are you doing here?” I croak and blush when I hear how rude that sounds. “It’s just, after what happened, everyone else left.”
His brows concave. “What happened? I knew the girls left, but no one told me why.”
I lose my breath for a little while. “You don’t know?”
His eyes rake over my face, and he shakes his head. “No, tell me.”
I inhale deeply, but I end up in tears. “My mother and I got in a heated argument that ended with her slapping me.”
“Oh my God. I am so…” His eyes widen, and he takes a step forward to comfort me but stops, confused, and rubs the back of his neck. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know. I would have left too—”
“And gone where?” I question.
He shrugs. “To my parents’? It’s where Rose is staying.”
“I didn’t know they were down here too.” Gosh, is everyone staying in Miami for the summer? That’s very strange, but Mason did mention his parents liked to visit here a couple of times per year.
“Yeah, they are.” He rubs his neck a little harder and sighs. “Now I feel like an asshole for staying after that. Are you okay?” He notices my continual tears, and I nod, then shake my head when he cocks an eyebrow.
“No,” I admit. “I know you’re probably still mad at me and I don’t know where we stand, but I have to say: I am losing my mind a little. Grey is back in the gang, and the leader or whatever isn’t letting him leave. And this morning he left, but with his gun. A fucking gun. He lied to me saying he was going to fight, but I don’t know if he’s going to really get in trouble or—or even worse.”
“Shhh…” He pulls me into his chest and rubs my back. I’m racked with tears, and he moves me side to side in a soothing motion. “Fuck our fight. I’m over it, and you need a shoulder to cry on. I’m sorry for what I said and not being there when you needed it.” He pulls back and offers a small smile. “Are we okay? Can we be okay? Please?”
I crack a smile and nod furiously, rushing back into his warm chest. “Yes, please. I missed you, Mase.”
“I missed you too, Liv.” He kisses my hair, and I smile against his chest. “Come in and we can talk.” I let him pull me into the house and nervously look around as he closes the door. “Don’t worry, your mother isn’t here. And Louise is out grocery shopping.”
I nod, feeling a little better knowing my mother isn’t here. But I’d like to see Louise. She’s probably heard what my mother did to me and is worried. I want to assure her that I am fine. I’ll just have to stay around and wait for her to come back, but I’m concerned my mother will come back and start something again. I am not ready to face her again.
“Oh, and Rose is here. I’ll just—”
“Rose,” I breathe, finding her sitting in the living room.
She looks up when I say her name and looks shocked but offers me a warm smile. “Hello, Liv. Long time no see…are you feeling all right? You look a little woozy.”
I try to speak, but I’m stuck. I haven’t seen her since the night before Grey and I jetted off to Venezuela the next morning. I feel incredibly guilty because I wasn’t thinking about how she felt when he let me accompany him instead of her, his obvious girlfriend. She said they weren’t a couple, but I saw the way she looked at him. She still loved him; maybe she still does even after he’s made it clear that we are working on being together again. She is so sweet and doesn’t deserve the heartbreak.
“I—” I look to Mason, who mirrors his sister’s concerned expression. I plaster on a wide smile that hurts and take a step back. “I just came to get something…so…I’m—I’m sorry,” I squeak and run toward the stairs.
“Wait!” both of them call out.
I hear someone chasing after me, but I plead to be left alone and rush up the stairs. I nearly slip and fall over a few, but I manage to make it to the grand second floor. I dash down one of the many hallways and charge into my old bedroom. I lock the door behind me, tears falling down my cheeks, and jump onto my bed.
“Come on, I need you. Please be here,” I whisper like a mess and throw the pillows away. I remember tucking it under my head the night of my first date with Noah. My heart stings at the mention of him. I still have yet to talk to him. I’m just hurting everyone in my path. I am so selfish.
“Please be here, please, please, please…” I am basically begging now as I push the comforter off and stand beside my bed. It isn’t here. Where is it? Did one of the workers wash the sheets or throw it away or something?
I toss the bed, using all of my strength until I fall to the floor and burst into tears, from worry over Grey, guilt from seeing Rose, and anger at myself for being so god damn selfish.