Chapter 7
Harmony turned to go, but Aiken’s hand shot out and touched her arm. “Wait, Harmony.”
His hand burned to her skin through her sleeve. A thousand voices screamed in his ear. “What is it?”
“Listen, Harmony, I know it doesn’t make any sense, but it’s not stupid. I feel the same way about Bruins’ Peak.”
Her eyes flew open. “You do?”
He nodded. Dear God, how could he make her understand? He knew what she was talking about. He was there. He was the bear she saw in the woods. “I always felt that way about Bruins’ Peak. I always loved wandering around in the woods. I feel more at home there than anywhere else in the world. I even feel like you did that the woods are some kind of church where I can find God.”
She couldn’t speak above a whisper. “Really?”
“I’ve seen things in the woods no one would believe. I’ve understood things in the woods that don’t make any sense outside them. What you just said about the bear, I experienced something like that, too.”
“With a bear?”
“Not exactly, but I want you to know I understand what you’re talking about. It’s not stupid or crazy. Actually, it makes a lot of sense.”
She laughed out loud in pure relief. “Thanks. Thanks for telling me that. It means a lot.”
For some reason, his hand still rested on her arm. He couldn’t let her go. He couldn’t let her walk away from him. That intoxicating scent pulled him toward her.
He drifted closer. Without his really meaning to, his fingers entwined with hers and his voice softened. He murmured into her ear. “You shouldn’t doubt yourself. You’re not stupid or ridiculous for experiencing something like that. You’re smart. You know you are. It just shows you’re connected to nature in a way most people never get to be.”
She studied his mouth. “Yeah, I have a problem with that. I guess because I’ve been alone all my life with no one in my corner, I start thinking maybe I’m not like other people.”
“You’re not like other people. That’s what makes you so special. That must be what Laird noticed about you.”
“Do you think so?”
“Of course. Everyone notices it. I noticed it the first time I saw you.”
He couldn’t shake himself loose. He couldn’t do anything but move closer and closer to her. His eyes moved to her lips. Was he really going to kiss her?
“I noticed you, too. I never met anyone like you before.”
His cheeks turned bright red at the memory of staring at Harmony across the Kerrs’ living room. Something magical connected them, and they hadn’t said a word to each other.
She had to hold her head back to look up into his face. Her whole body posture opened to him and invited him in. “I’m glad you think I’m special. I don’t hear that very often.”
“You are special. You’re special to Laird, and you’re special to me. Just remember that if you start to doubt yourself. You’re special enough to meet that bear in the woods.”
“Of course. I’m so special I met a devil bear. That makes perfect sense. I must be a devil, too.”
Aiken joined her in nervous laughter. His arms just opened by themselves and surrounded her with their friendly comforting embrace.
With a sudden jolt, he realized what he was doing. Her body scorched his skin and knocked him off his feet. He pulled away as fast as he could, but the damage was done. He touched her. He hugged her. He only wanted to comfort her, to let her know she wasn’t cracked in the head for having an uplifting experience in the woods on Bruins’ Peak. Now here he was hugging her.
He took a step back. He had to get away from her before something terrible happened. She was human, but her scent attracted him beyond comprehension. She smelled like no human he ever met before. Her scent set his blood on fire.
He noticed it when he smelled her in the woods. The bear in his soul wanted that scent, to consume it and know it and claim it for its own. The bear didn’t understand about humans. The bear didn’t understand rules. It wanted a female, and not just any female. No Bruin ever sparked his passion like this. He wanted her. He had to have her.
Aiken started to turn away when Harmony spoke up. “You’ll be around Monday, won’t you, when I come to visit? You’ll show me around your greenhouses, won’t you?”
He mumbled under his breath. His brain wouldn’t work. He had to get out of here before he grabbed her. “Sure. I’ll be there.”
“I guess I’ll see you at the house—that is, if you’re not too busy.”
He dug his toe into sidewalk. “I’ll come down to the house to meet you. I’ll show you around.”
“I appreciate it. These visits always go much smoother if you know someone in advance.”
His eyes darted to her face. He would go nuts if he stayed near her one more second. “Thanks, Harmony.”
“What for? I didn’t do anything.”
“Thanks for talking about this. I never talked to anybody about this before.”
“Don’t other Bruins feel this way about the Peak?”
“I don’t know. I never asked.”
“I wish everyone knew what it was like. That would help them understand why you keep to yourselves up there.”
He stopped himself from putting out his hand again. “Don’t tell anybody.”
“Why not?”
“They wouldn’t understand. They already think we’re strange enough.”
“I don’t think you’re strange.”
“You’re different.” Aiken found himself staring at her lips as she spoke. Her tongue flashed just beyond the barrier of her teeth. He could taste her. He could imagine every pore of her skin.
“I better go.”
Aiken nodded. “I’ll see you Monday.”
Harmony looked up at him with eyes full of hope. “You promise?”
His face cracked into a big grin. “I promise.”
Neither of them made any move to leave. They stole quick glances at each other’s faces before lowering their eyes to the ground. “See you later.”
“Yeah.”
Harmony backed away, but Aiken didn’t move. He watched her retreat across the parking lot toward her car. She cast a few backward glances at him, and when she did, her smile lit up her face.
She got in her car and drove away with one last wave. I’ll see you Monday kept repeating in his mind. I’ll see you Monday, Harmony. Such innocent words, but so dangerous.
After she disappeared around a corner, he walked on toward the hardware store. Boyd was nowhere in sight, so Aiken got into the passenger seat of the big black Escalade parked in front of the store. He plugged his tablet into the cigarette lighter and let his thoughts drift.
He had to get Harmony McGillis out of his mind once and for all. Telling her point blank there could never be anything between them did no good at all. He didn’t believe that and neither did she.
She was human, for Pete’s sake. What was he thinking, getting all worked up over a human? Didn’t he know that could only end in disaster? Of course he did. She didn’t know it, but that made no difference.
Any man with warm blood in his veins could see her face fall when he told her to give up any idea of them being together. He couldn’t expect her to understand about Bruins being reproductively incompatible with humans. She didn’t know what the word ‘Bruin’ meant. How could she? No one in Iron Bark knew the truth.
He could pound his head against the wall ‘til kingdom come, but he couldn’t get her out of his head. Her skin, her hair, her eyes all drove him nuts. He never wanted any woman like this, certainly not a Bruin woman. He knew tons of Bruin women more beautiful than Harmony. He knew tons of Bruin women more successful, smarter, and more fashionable. None of them could hold a candle to her.
He never gave any Bruin woman the time of day, so what was he doing dreaming about Harmony coming to his Homestead on Monday? What did he really think he was going to do? He would show her around his greenhouses. She would meet his nephews and his sisters and his parents. Then she would get in her car and drive away. He wasn’t doing anything but torturing himself thinking about her.
The sad reality hammered into his mind. The bear wanted her. The bear wanted the female whose scent he caught in the woods when he met Harmony. The bear didn’t care what she was. The bear wanted a mate. It wanted her for a mate, and it wouldn’t rest until it got her.
How could he face his family with this secret weighing him down? How could he face Harmony on Monday? How could he crave her and show her around his Homestead like any ordinary local official on an inspection?
His lips ached to kiss her. His arms longed to hold her close and protect her from this cruel world. She needed love and belonging and family, and he knew how to give it to her. Every inch of his skin screamed for her, but he could never have her.
He ought to never see her again. He ought to disappear Sunday night and just happen to be nonexistent Monday morning when she came around. He’d done it before, and he could do it again. His family wouldn’t think anything of it. That’s what a sensible Bruin would do to avoid contact with the forbidden.
Even as the thought crossed his mind, he knew he wouldn’t do that. He would be there, bright and early Monday morning, in a clean shirt and clean pants, with his teeth brushed and his fingernails scrubbed. His face would be the first to greet her when she got out of her car on Monday. He would do anything—absolutely anything—to see her again, to be near her again, to talk to her and help her and make her burden lighter.
To hell with the rules. If she was forbidden, he would become forbidden, too. He would turn his back on his whole tribe, on the whole Bruin race, to win her. No, he wouldn’t. He couldn’t do that. Bruins didn’t do that. Turning his back on Bruins’ Peak meant living a life of destitution and exile. It meant never having children, never participating in family reunions or weddings or funerals. It meant giving up a share in his inheritance, in never speaking to his relatives again.
He couldn’t do that. He had to toe the line. He had to wipe Harmony McGillis and everything she did and said and stood for off the face of the Earth. She didn’t exist for him. He had to find himself a nice Bruin wife and raise a bunch of cubs the way his mother always nagged him to do. He had to take over his share of the business and be ready to run it along with Boyd when their father passed on. That’s the way it worked.
Boyd came back and slid into the driver’s seat. He started the motor and rambled on about the parts he bought, but Aiken didn’t hear him. He stared straight ahead of him at nothing the whole way home.
What was the point in living at all, if he couldn’t have this one thing he desired more than anything? What was the point in a nice house and a loving extended family, if you couldn’t have the one woman in the world you truly craved?
He would never mate with a nice Bruin woman and raise a bunch of cubs. Bruins mate for life, and they only ever mated with their heart’s true match. That much was certain. They found the one they really wanted and stuck. Well, he found the one he really wanted, but he would never have her. He would live the rest of his life miserable and no one would ever know why.