3
Robin
It takes every ounce of my self-control not to get the hell out of Whiskey Jacks Saloon. I should never have been so stupid, going up to Reid like that in the first place. What I should have done was finish that song, drink a glass of water to calm myself down, and get ready for this last set.
But I’ve never been too good with impulse control.
Case in point.
I inform Barclay, my guitarist and best friend, that we’re going to perform a song that Danielle and I wrote a few years ago, and instruct him to follow along with a basic chord. Barclay and I have been singing and writing country western songs for years, so he’s used to me switching up our sets. He knows the song too, but maybe he doesn’t realize that the song will be directed to Reid.
Barclay nods, and his shoulder-length brown hair swings forward. He doesn’t even ask me why as he plays with his neatly trimmed goatee. I look over at him after announcing to the audience that I’m dedicating the song to my sister. He doesn’t suggest I may be taking a risk by singing something this emotionally charged. Okay, it’s an angry, sad country ballad. This would be the ideal time for someone to talk me off a ledge. I wish he didn’t trust me so much.
Taking a seat on the backless bar stool set up behind the microphone stand, I take a breath, avoid making eye contact with Reid at all costs, and I sing.
Are you ever gonna tell me why,
You upped and left without a damned goodbye,
What did I ever do to make you leave here,
You took my heart away with you, dear.
I was crying in my bed,
Because of words you never said,
Bye Bye Hero,
Why Why Hero.
So many nights I could not sleep,
Too bad my soul was yours to keep,
Can’t seem to get over you yet,
Tell me, do you have some regret?
I was crying in my bed,
Because of words you never said,
Bye Bye Hero,
Why Why Hero.
Just don’t come back expecting sunshine,
Matter of fact, just don’t come around,
I’ll stick to family, friends and wine,
To make up for the loss I found.
You’re someone else’s hero now,
They must all be so damn proud,
A part of me just ain’t too sad,
One day you’ll see what we had.
Bye Bye Hero,
Bye Bye Hero.
By the time I finish the first verse, I realize singing this particular song is a big mistake. I get to the bridge and a few hot tears blur my vision, refusing to be blinked back. What Reid did to my sister had a profound effect on us all. He walked out of her life, and we were left to handle the repercussions. A tear runs down my cheek as I let out the last line. I’m a wreck, and I can only be grateful that Barclay and I have been performing gigs on tiny stages like these for so long that not even the waterworks affect my voice.
Crowds like this just love sad old country songs that hit them in the gut, which is why most everyone gets out of their seats for this closing round of applause. Clasping my hands together over the mic, I nod and thank them for listening. Patrons from a several tables come up to the front to congratulate us personally and put cash into the stage tip jar. I’m also thanking the stars that Barclay added a long enough guitar solo to my song, so we can wrap it up as the last song of our gig this evening.
We settle up with Rusty for our pay and split the tips.
“You were awesome tonight,” Barclay tells me as he packs up his gear.
“Thanks. You were too. I liked those chords you ran with for the last song.”
“Hey, while you were in the restroom just now, Rusty came by with some good news.”
“Please tell me he invited us back.”
He nods, smiling with pride. “He sure did! Three nights a week, starting tomorrow.”
“That’s great! Going by the tips we got tonight, I’d say we could be making a few hundred bucks a gig here. Lord knows I can use the money.”
“You and me both.” He looks at his watch. “We’d better get going. We have twenty-five or so minutes to get over to Stars and Spokes Bar.”
“Let’s go,” I say. We can’t leave here soon enough. It means I don’t have to see or speak to Reid for the rest of the night.
But it seems that he hasn’t gotten the memo.
“Robin,” Reid says from a few feet behind me as I follow Barclay to the front entrance.
Ignoring him, I keep walking. I don’t want to look at him right now, simply because I have no idea if I can control my runaway mouth. I may spill a secret that’s not mine to share.
Reid catches up with me outside the front door. He grabs my elbow lightly. “Will you just tell me what the hell is going on?” he shouts in a voice that commands my attention.
Barclay whips around from his spot in the middle of the parking lot. He sees Reid’s hand on me and returns to my side, taking a protective stance a few inches ahead of me to serve as a buffer between Reid and me. Already, this is not going well. He gives Reid a genuinely dangerous stare-down, a familiar expression I’ve seen on his face a few times before. Barclay and I are just friends, but he wouldn’t bat an eyelash put himself in harm’s way to fight for me.
“Robin, is this guy bothering you?” Barclay asks, lifting his Gibson off of his left shoulder to prepare for a potential fistfight.
“It’s okay,” I answer, turning to look up at my sister’s ex. “My…friend was just leaving…weren’t you, Reid? Because I know for sure you don’t want any trouble.”
Reid releases my arm and steps back. “You’re right. I don’t, but I also prefer not to show up at your parents’ house to find out how to get in contact with Danielle so she can tell me what’s going on.”
Shit.
He’s got a point there.
I can talk to Reid. Everyone else in my family is liable to break out a rifle and let the buck shots do the talking.
“Okay, fine. Give me your number. I can meet you after work tomorrow, but you need to promise me that after we talk, you’ll go off into the sunset, or under a rock, wherever, as long as you don’t go looking for Danielle or anyone else for answers. As far as I’m concerned, you’re nine years too late. Deal?”
He studies me for a second before shaking his head and reaching into his pocket. “Deal,” he answers, and passes a business card to me. “Send me a text so we can set something up. See you around, Robin.”
“That meathead is Danielle’s ex?” Barclay asks once Reid returns inside and is safely out of earshot.
“Yes.”
He turns and walks back to his beat-up Toyota truck. “And you felt compelled to sing that song?”
“I couldn’t help myself. Why didn’t you stop me?”
He reaches into his pocket and finds one of the hairbands he uses to put all that hair into a manbun. He always does that when he’s upset or freaked out. “How the hell as I supposed to know who Reid is?”
“You’re right. I’m sorry. He was sitting there with his friends, looking so happy, acting like nothing happened, while Danielle had such a hard road because of him.”
Barclay opens my door for me. He’s always been such a gentleman. “I get that, but seriously, talk about beating a dead horse and poking the bear, all at the same time. If you wanted him to stay away, it might have been a better idea to pick another song. You know? One that doesn’t kick him in the teeth or get him wondering what the hell went down that was so life-altering that it caused you…Danielle’s sister… to write a song about the two of them. You’ve pretty much sent out a signal flare that says, ‘Hey Reid, how the hell are you? What do you think about moseying on over here and tracking down my sister for answers while I bring up ancient history and open up some old wounds?’.”
“Yeah. I guess that wasn’t too smart,” I breathe out, shoulders slumped and feeling like an idiot as I step up into the passenger seat.
Barclay places his guitar in the extra cab space behind me.
“Ya think?”
I throw on my seatbelt and rest my head on the seat back, closing my eyes as Barclay goes to the driver side and gets in. I did this. I’ve got to fix it before it becomes a real problem. Protecting Danielle is all I care about now. Tomorrow, I’ll set up that quick meeting with Reid, apologize for going overboard, and leave out as many of the details as I can. All while avoiding a new discovery that I just found out about outside the ladies’ restroom.
I find Reid almost irresistible.
Lord help me.
It’s time for some damage control.