~

 

“I’ve never seen so many elder witches in one place, and all at the same time. It’s like going to clown school and being surrounded by creepy clowns,” Rick, the pack’s enforcer, whispered as he leaned in toward Nathan and eyed the new crowd of matchmaking hopefuls that had turned up for the long weekend.

“If it keeps Dorothy and Angela out of mischief, I’m all for it,” Nathan offered back. He kept his voice just as low as his friend so that none of the elders could overhear them.

His mate, Sarah, had been a little bit snappy lately and he wasn’t about to put himself in the firing line. He liked his backside without the scorch marks of a good zap, not that it left any, but it sure felt as if it did when she got her mean side on.

“It’s a sea of white heads bobbing up and down,” Rick grumbled. He liked elders as much as the next man, but they could be cantankerous, and he had a habit of rubbing people up the wrong way.

“They don’t have cooties, Rick,” Nathan chuckled.

“I’ll tell you what they do have – octopus hands,” Rick growled.

“Well, you’re not mated…”

“Don’t finish that sentence, for my own sanity,” Rick growled and faked a shiver at the thought of it for Nathan’s benefit.

“Look at it this way – all that experience in the bedroom is right out there for the taking. I say go for it, throw caution to the wind and jump on board the love train.” Nathan chuckled when Rick’s face looked as if he was sucking on a lemon. The enforcer groaned.

“I think I threw up a little…”

Chloe’s upside down body dropped down from the tree branch above them and made both shifters jump in place. She was hanging by the backs of her knees on one of the thick branches and swung back and forth for a moment. Neither man had felt the need to look up and check for a vampire lurking in foliage.

“Damn it, Chloe,” Nathan growled out. If she wasn’t a female vampire, then he might just have used her head for a punchbag.

“I said we should have killed her right at the start,” Rick growled to his alpha, and Chloe narrowed her eyes at him.

“No you didn’t,” she snorted a chuckle. “Better worry about your own backsides boys, because when I’m done telling Dorothy and Angela what you just said…”

“Nooo,” Nathan shook his head.

The alpha knew that if Chloe snitched to the elders, then they, in turn, would tell his mate, Sarah, and he’d be in the doghouse for longer than he cared to be. Boy, could his mate hold a grudge?

“Go right ahead,” Rick folded his thick, muscled arms across his broad chest, and offered a cocky, crooked grin to the newbie vampire.

“What?” Nathan shot a glare the enforcer’s way. He might even have swallowed a portion of his tongue.

“I’ve got no dog in this fight,” Rick turned that triumphant grin on his alpha.

“You’re gonna throw me under the bus?” Nathan grumbled.

“You betcha,” Rick offered back.

“Get back here, old man,” Chloe bit out the moment that the enforcer turned on his heels to walk away. Rick stopped in his tracks and turned back slowly to eye the upside down woman.

“Old?” his gravelly voice sounded a little more grumpy than gravelly.

“You’re not getting any younger,” Chloe offered back.

“We’re all born with our feet astride the grave, Chloe, you should know that better than anyone,” he said, eyeing the woman that he’d known since birth, and she was around about his age back then. Rick was in his forties, he might not have been a young pup, but he didn’t consider himself old either.

“Not my problem anymore,” Chloe said, inspecting her fingernails with a victory grin.

“Nope, because you’re already dead, or did you forget that little snippet?” Rick tossed back.

“Can we get back to you not telling the elders what we said?” Nathan growled.

“Wait your turn,” Chloe snapped at the alpha, and Nathan grumbled long and hard. “I can live with that, Rick.”

“Or not as the case may be,” Rick snorted a chuckle.

“I’m young…” Chloe shot back.

“You’re dead,” Rick growled.

“I’m forever beautiful,” Chloe shot back.

“You’re dead,” Rick said again.

“What part of eternally youthful don’t you get?” Chloe bit out; her top lip was twitching in annoyance.

“Oh, let’s see,” Rick lifted a hand and tapped a thick finger against his lips. Then he gave a little eureka grin. “The part where you’re dead.”

“I’m so telling the elders on you,” Chloe snorted a victory chuckle.

“Hey, elder witches,” Rick called out, and snowy white heads turned towards him. “We include a free zapping session with the local vampire. Have at her, folks.”

Chloe’s face was such a picture that, if he ended boots up in the ground the very next day, he’d be glad he didn’t miss it. The vampire shrieked as the first blast of someone’s magic hit her, and she shot upwards in the tree.

“Wait…” Nathan growled out. He didn’t want Chloe to go running straight to the damn elders.

“Gotta go,” Chloe bit out, disappearing into the foliage. “But, you are so going to get it when I tell.” She called out on a parting shot as she ran from branch to branch with little feminine yelps along the way from the sting of the witches magic.

Nathan turned a dark stare towards his friend, and Rick chuckled low in his chest as he held two giant hands up in front of him.

“Don’t shoot the messenger,” he grinned.

“Seriously?” Nathan started towards him.

He had a need to plant his fist in the enforcer’s face for the world of pain that the man just might have put him in.

“Nathan!” Sarah called out from somewhere up on the front porch, and Nathan stopped in his tracks.

“Damn, already?” The alpha bit out with a slow shake of his head.

“See this,” Rick held up his thumb, pad side down, and he pressed and pushed it through the air.

“What the hell are you doing, mime?” Nathan growled.

“That’s you, my friend,” Rick chuckled back. “And this thumb is your mate.”

“I’m under the thumb?” Nathan growled, folding his arms over his broad chest and snorting his contempt for the enforcer’s words.

“You have no damn idea, do you?” Rick chuckled.

Nathan lifted his hand and pointed a finger at the man, but when he opened his mouth to speak, he was silenced by his mate’s voice.

“Nathan!” She yelled louder, and boy, did she have a set of lungs on her when she wanted them?

“He’s right here, Sarah,” Rick raised his hand high and pointed at the alpha, and Nathan groaned long and hard. “Suck it up, alpha.”

Rick turned on his heels and started to walk away on a deep chuckle that tormented Nathan just as much as it mocked him. Nathan took one long step towards the man, his hands fisted at his sides…

“Nathan, come on!” Sarah called, and the alpha groaned. He was torn between being at his mate’s side and ripping Rick a new butthole.

Unfortunately, butthole ripping was going to have to wait.

 

 

~

~

~

 

“Oh, zapping the vampire was fun. I haven’t had target practice in a long time, and it’s always good to keep your hand in because you never know, you know?” One of the elder witches chuckled as she walked beside another woman of slightly younger years.

Angela frowned as she listened to the conversation.

“I thought this weekend was going to be a bust, but first we get to zap, then we get the eye candy, and did you see those silver wolves? Now, where did I pack my blood pressure medication?” The woman started to fish inside of her handbag.

“There’s an idea,” Angela said as she nudged Dorothy in the ribs and the elder witch grunted in annoyance.

“Nudge me again, and you’ll be pulling back a stump,” she hissed.

“That might work with Chloe, but it doesn’t work with me,” Angela offered back as she eyed her friend and tried to decide if the woman was having one of her senior moments or not. She didn’t want to get spelled again because Dorothy was in dream-world.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Dorothy grumbled.

“Just checking,” Angela shrugged.

“For a pulse?” Dorothy scowled back.

“Something like that,” Angela bit out with a dry tone. “So, back to my new idea…”

“Oh no,” Dorothy shook her head.

“No?” Angela frowned. She liked to make the pitch before her friend tossed out the idea.

“This was your idea, and now we’re overrun with fellow snow globes,” Dorothy snorted.

“Snow globes? Are you feeling alright?” Angela’s eyebrows crinkled as she gave her friend a curious stare.

“Look at them,” Dorothy motioned around her. “Old witches everywhere.”

“It’s a matchmaking service for the elder witch,” Angela said slowly and clearly so that there could be no mistake.

“I know that smarty pants, but does there have to be so many?” Dorothy sighed.

“What’s the problem?” Angela shrugged back.

“It reminds me of the damn care home,” Dorothy grumbled.

Angela knew how much she’d hated that place. That was why they’d made their grand escape, to give Dorothy one more chance of life. Luckily they’d found Sarah.

“Senior living facility,” Angela berated her. “And you can’t say old anymore…”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not politically adequate or recognized, or policy, or some such nonsense…” Angela tossed up her hands.

“I’m old, and I’ve earned the right to say I’m old, and those political penguins can kiss my wrinkled…”

“Please stop before I get that image in…” Samuel groaned and dropped his head forward on his neck. “Too late – thanks for the nightmares I’m going to have tonight.” He grumbled.

“Oh, suck it up, puppy,” Angela bit back, and the beta raised his head and grumbled a growl at the elder. “Yeah you, wait until your ball sack is hanging down between your knees and your…”

“That’s it,” Samuel raised his hands in surrender. “There is no talking to you people.” He grumbled a growl as he started off across the room to the sound of the elder's snickers behind him.

“Poor baby,” Dorothy giggled, and she laughed louder when one of the elder witches reached out and copped a feel on his way by them.

“Seriously?” Samuel growled.

“Bless his little snowflake sensibilities,” Dorothy chuckled as the beta offered her the look of a constipated cow.

“What the hell is a snow… you know what? I don’t care. So, my new idea…” Angela started, and Dorothy groaned.

“Don’t ruin my morning,” she grumbled as she turned and started off away from Angela, but her friend was hard on her heels, not that she was getting anywhere too fast, to begin with.

“What say we start a refreshing spa?” Angela leaned in and whispered. Dorothy turned her head and yanked her head back on her neck as she turned her nose up at that idea.

“Spa? What are you – senile or something? These women don’t need a spa — oxygen tank maybe — that one over there that looks like a beetroot, I’m guessing she needs blood pressure medication.” Dorothy was eyeing the assembled witches. “Less sunshine — more sunshine…” she pointed out. “That one’s too far gone, nothing’s going to help her.”

“Vampire blood,” Angela shrugged with a twinkling light of mischief in her eyes that Dorothy knew well.

“Oh, dear,” Dorothy grumbled back.