Silently, Trak and Chelo walked hand in hand to his cabin. He had no idea what she was thinking, wasn’t even certain what was tumbling around in his own brain. He hadn’t thought beyond the threat of Rube. Hadn’t really considered how his life would change, now that he had a mate. He glanced her way, caught her watching him, and almost laughed.
He still couldn’t believe she was his. His and safe. Finally.
Instead, she smiled and so did he, feeling unexplainably shy for some reason. They’d made love most of the night last night, exploring each other with the utmost abandon, almost as if it might be the only chance they’d ever have for that amazing intimacy. In the back of his mind he’d worried about Rube somehow taking Chelo away, and losing her, if not to her psychotic brother-in-law, then to death. His or hers, it didn’t matter. Their chance at love would have ended before anything had really begun.
Now, though? Now they were beginning, the two of them on the threshold of an entirely new life. Chelo had survived a lifetime of pain and abuse with her spirit intact. He was amazed the cruelty she’d suffered hadn’t broken her. Instead, she was so powerful, so strong, he was awed by her strength. Without even thinking it through, he stopped in the middle of the dark wood and held both her hands in his.
“You are an amazing woman, Consuela de los Lobos. You are better than me, stronger than me … definitely a lot prettier than me.” He kissed her quickly when she laughed. “But no one will ever love you more than me. I promise to love you until the day we die, and if there is a life beyond, I will love you into that one. You make me a better man, and I hope like hell I’m a good mate to you. We will have amazing sons, you and I. And a long life together, the two of us. I promise you a lifetime of love, and I will always honor you.”
Her trembling hands tightened their grasp on his, and he realized her entire body shook. Her eyes sparkled with emotion—tears ready to spill—and she bit her lips as if searching for control. When she spoke, her voice was raspy with those unshed tears. “I have never truly known love, and yet I recognized it immediately the first time I saw you. I think my wolf knew her mate long before the human side understood, but I promise I will always love you, that I will stand by your side as you lead this pack, and I will forever be your lover, your helpmate, your confidante. And if we are blessed with children and our sons are anything like their father, I will be forever grateful. There is no finer man.”
Trak pulled her into his arms and kissed her. And then, as if they hadn’t just opened their hearts and made vows more important than anything they might share before the pack, they took the final steps to the front door of Trak’s cabin and went inside.
He closed the door and then just stood there and watched her. With her long, glossy black hair falling almost to her waist, her head turned a bit to one side so that he saw her in profile, she looked like some ethereal goddess come to bless his home.
But wasn’t that exactly what she’d done? He’d given up hope of finding a mate, and yet the woman who was now his was more than anything he’d imagined.
Chelo had stopped in the main room, her hands clasped in front of her, and looked about as if this were her first time inside. When she turned to Trak, her smile split her face. “Why does it feel new tonight? Almost as if I’ve never been here before.”
He stepped up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist. “When you were last here, you were still afraid. Rube was a threat we knew we’d have to deal with; there was always the chance that he’d get lucky, that one of us could die. That someone in the pack would be hurt or worse. That woman, that Chelo, had lived her entire life in fear and knew no other way to be.”
He swept her into his arms, holding her close against his chest. Laughing, she wrapped her arms around his neck. “I’m not afraid. Not anymore. You’re right. That’s why it feels new.”
“It’s because you’re new.” He planted a heartfelt kiss on her mouth and then turned and walked up the stairs with Chelo in his arms. “You are new and fresh, and while there is no way to forget the years you were with that other pack, it’s molded you into a woman more powerful than any I’ve ever known. I can’t believe you’re mine, Chelo. Thank you for coming to me, for letting me love you.”
“Well, I’m certainly hoping that you plan to do it again. And again. And then, after we rest a bit, again.”
By the time he hit the top step he was running, and in mere seconds he had her in his bedroom, tumbled onto the middle of the bed while he stripped off his clothes. She crouched there on her hands and knees, laughing as he kicked off his jeans and ripped his shirt when he pulled it over his head. But when he stood before her, stripped of his clothes, chest blowing in and out with a combination of adrenaline and lust, his body and mind equally aroused, Chelo stopped laughing.
It was terribly gratifying, the way she watched him. Eyes wide and pupils dilated, she reminded him of a fawn staring into the eyes of a wolf, though this woman was no timid fawn. He flattened his palms on the bed and raised one knee, moving closer. She watched him, the hint of a smile barely tilting her lips, the scent of her arousal coming off her in waves of heat that had him harder than he could recall.
But something was off. Was it arousal or had something else invaded? An acrid scent he’d not noticed before. Faint, but still part of the scents his sensitive nose detected.
He crept closer until they almost touched. Then he leaned close and realized she was trembling, that her smile was gone and her face seemed almost frozen with fear. He thought of all the years she’d been afraid for good reason, the beatings and the rapes, the horrible life of never knowing when her psychotic mate would want to fuck her or beat her or both.
Trak never, ever wanted to frighten her, but he didn’t want her embarrassed that he’d recognized her fear, as she would be when she realized that no, he wasn’t going to hurt her.
That knowledge would come, but she didn’t truly believe it yet. Not at a level that went deep enough to cancel out fear born of a lifetime of abuse. He crept a bit closer, and then he leaned close and kissed her nose and sat back on his heels. “You’re still much too covered in clothing, my love. May I help you remove it?”
She shook herself, and he wondered where her mind had been. “No.” She sat back on her heels. “I’ll remove it myself. I saw what you did to your shirt. I don’t have a lot of clothes.”
He glanced over his shoulder at the torn shirt lying on the floor and shrugged. “I promise to be careful.”
“How do I know I can trust you?”
She was teasing, but the undertone was definitely serious. She had every right to fear men. “You can always trust me, Chelo.” He flipped around until his back was against the stack of pillows covering the headboard, giving her distance he’d rather close than open. “I never have and never will hit any woman, and that includes you. No matter how angry I get, and believe me, in any longtime relationship we’re bound to have anger at times, I will never hit you or hurt you in any way. And if I do go out into the forest and sulk, I will always come back to you.”
She crawled up his length until she was lying against him. Still fully clothed, but at least she didn’t seem as afraid anymore. He wondered where her thoughts had gone. There was that brief moment where …
“Do you really sulk?”
“Sometimes.” He sucked in one side of his cheek to keep from laughing. “I’ve been known to sulk on occasion. I’ve been around for over a hundred and fifty years, Chelo, and yes, I’ve been thwarted a time or two, which resulted in a bit of a sulk. But only when I had a really good reason.”
“I see.”
He wrapped his arms around her and she snuggled against his chest. A scent hit him then, one he’d not noticed earlier. Rube. The bastard had carried her out of the lodge, held her against his sweaty shirt. He wondered if that stench was still in her nostrils, fouling her senses. He slipped away from her and got out of bed. “Come with me.”
Frowning, she followed him into the bathroom. He leaned into the large shower and turned on the water, adjusting the valves until the temperature was right. Then he turned to her and slowly helped her out of her clothes. When she was naked, he wrapped everything into a bundle, tossed the clothing into the hamper, and shut the lid. Tight.
“I don’t want to start our life together with the scent of another man on your clothing.” He rested his forehead against hers. “I didn’t notice it until we were on the bed and you crawled up next to me, Rube’s scent on your clothing and your hair. I’m sorry, Chelo. I love the way you smell, and his scent is just wrong.”
She covered her face with her hands. “I can’t smell it anymore. I think my senses are so filled with his stench that I can’t smell it.”
“It’s not your fault. C’mon.” He stepped into the shower and tugged her along with him. She immediately stood under the water and tilted her head back to wet her hair. Trak squirted citrus-scented shampoo into his hand and then washed her hair, cleaning every bit of Rube’s stench away from her. She leaned against him as he bathed her. Thank goodness she hadn’t been insulted, but there was no way in hell he was bringing that bastard into their bed.
* * *
The moment Trak mentioned Rube’s scent, Chelo realized that was the reason she’d felt so unsettled. Trak wanted to make love, but she couldn’t let herself go with him. Crazy, after the way they’d been last night, but it must have been Rube’s disgusting stench. She wasn’t consciously aware of it, not with it covering her, but her subconscience knew. That explained the way she’d frozen when Trak wanted to take her clothes off.
Now, though, with his hands gently working the conditioner into her hair, she wanted him to touch her everywhere. The source of her fear was gone—Rube’s stench, washed down the drain with the suds.
She turned and rested her forehead against Trak’s chest so he could rinse her hair. It felt so good, his hands a gentle caress, the warm water beating against her sore muscles. She couldn’t believe she hadn’t been cut. When Rube jumped through that window, her body had caught the brunt of the blow. She felt it now, her muscles bruised, her body battered and tired.
But Trak? He’d been erect since they’d gotten inside the cabin. There was one thing she could do for him, and she wanted to try everything with Trak. She knew what it was like to take him in her mouth, already knew she loved the taste of the man she would love for all time.
But in the shower? With water streaming over the two of them? She shivered, merely thinking about it. Sinking slowly to her knees, she wrapped her arms around his thighs and laid her cheek against his groin.
“Chelo?”
The question in his voice had her raising her head, looking at him. “Hmmm?”
“Are you okay? What are…?”
“I’m sleepy but very curious. We’ve never done this in the shower. And just think, if I miss any, I won’t make a mess.”
“Ah … I see. You’re a very practical woman. I like that.”
She heard the laughter in his voice. This man found humor in just about everything and he always seemed to understand her subtle attempts. She liked that. Wrapping her fingers around the thick base of his penis, she tilted him to her mouth. He was so much taller than her. So much larger …
“Uhmmm…” Her mouth fit around the silky tip perfectly and she slipped her lips over the tightly drawn cowl of his foreskin, caught in place behind the broad crown. He was hotter even than the hot shower, hot against her tongue, but the taste of him was nothing more than the taste of the flowing water that washed his scent away.
“I want to get out of the shower. I can’t taste you and I want that. If there’s a mess, you’ll just have to help me clean it up.”
“I dunno about that,” he said, but she heard the laughter behind the fierce declaration, and within minutes they were both dry and back on the bed.
“Here,” she said, pushing him back until he sat on the edge of the bed with his feet on the floor. “This is a good height.” Grabbing a pillow off the bed, she tucked it under her knees and knelt between his legs. Tugging him forward, she finally had him where she wanted him.
There was so much she wanted to do with Trak that she suddenly had all kinds of energy. She studied all those fascinating parts. His erection hadn’t subsided a bit and there was definitely more than a mouthful, so she started by merely licking the length of his shaft, teasing him with her tongue, then lifting his erection out of the way and running her open mouth over his testicles. She pulled first one and then the other into her mouth, stroking him with her tongue, tasting him, growing more aroused by his wonderful scent.
Fluid gathered at the slit on his crown, and she licked that off. He tasted wonderful, so she did it again, but she wanted more. Wrapping her fingers around his shaft, she ran her lips over the smooth tip until he was slick; then she took him into her mouth, using her tongue and lips until she sucked him as deep as she could.
She held on to the thick base of his cock and worked him with her mouth, taking in almost all of him. He’d grown quiet. She opened her eyes and glanced along his body. He lay back on the bed, hands grasping the bedspread, his mouth twisted in a grimace that possibly could have been interpreted as pain but pleased her no end.
He was close to coming. Because of her. She sucked him deep again, used her tongue and lips, and sped up the whole process. His body jerked. “Chelo? You’re gonna make me…”
She slipped free of him and said, “Good.” If he thought she was going to stop now, the man was absolutely clueless. She increased her efforts, lightly grasped his balls in one hand, and rolled them between her fingers.
She felt his muscles go stiff, heard his curse, and caught the first spurts of his seed as his body bucked beneath her hands. She swallowed as his cock seemed to flex within her mouth and she took everything he had to give. Swallowed every drop and licked her lips when he was finally finished.
Then she licked the length of his cock and around his sac, well aware that she was marking him in the only way she knew how. Marking him with her scent. Telling Trak and any other woman who might find him interesting that he was well and truly taken.
She crawled into bed beside him and turned out the light. He pulled her close against his chest and slipped his fingers between her legs. They were exhausted, but he gently brought her to climax before they both drifted off.
* * *
It was a quiet walk back to his cabin, but Evan was afraid to say anything. He had no idea what Darnell was thinking. Would she ever be his Nellie again? Did she still love him? Did she think he was a freak? Was she afraid of him?
She held his hand, but she hadn’t said a word.
He was terrified he was going to lose her. She’d seen the worst of him tonight. He’d changed before her eyes; he’d lied by omission, no matter that Trak took the blame. Nellie didn’t strike him as a woman who forgave easily. The worst thing of all? She’d watched him kill a man.
Granted, the bastard needed to die, but she would never be able to look at him again without realizing he had the power to hurt her badly if he wanted to. How did a powerful werewolf convince a human woman that the only way he’d use his strength around her was to protect her from harm?
They climbed the steps to his cabin and Nellie opened the door, but only because he held the big jar of Meg’s punch in his other hand. Nellie hadn’t turned him free, yet. That was a good thing, wasn’t it? He went ahead of her into the cabin and she closed the door behind him, but she turned loose of his hand when she turned to the door. When she turned around, her hands were behind her and she leaned against the door.
He set the jar of punch on the counter and walked back across the room, but before he could say anything she stepped away from the door and into his arms. He held her close and didn’t even try to hide his sigh of relief.
She hugged him just as tightly with her head pressed against his chest. “Are you okay?” she asked.
He chuckled softly. “Shouldn’t that be my question? I’m sorry, Nell…”
She leaned back and pressed her finger to his lips. “No. Don’t be sorry. Trak said you weren’t allowed to tell me anything, and I actually do understand that. Plus, it means I’m not crazy. Remember when you jumped from the road all the way up the hillside to me the first day I got here? And you had to jump over my car to reach me?” She shook her head. “It’s good to know I’m not crazy. What I’m worried about is how you feel about killing that man tonight. I could tell it really upset you, but I’m glad you did it. I’m just sorry that you had to be the one to do it, but someone had to. Zach certainly couldn’t have, and I was using a gun loaded with blanks, so you saved both of us, not to mention Chelo. There was no other way, not when he started to change.”
Damn, he loved her so fucking much. “Thank you. I accept the fact that Rube had to die. He was psychotic, to say the least. Even the men with him were afraid of him, and there wasn’t a bit of regret from them over his death. The thing that made it difficult to accept is that I’ve never done that before. Never taken a life. I’ve always wondered if, when the time came and I had no other choice, I would be able to do exactly what I did, but I realized it wasn’t as difficult a decision to make as I’d expected.”
“Why do you think that was?”
He shook his head. “Because I didn’t kill him just to make a bad person go away. I killed him to protect you and Chelo, and Zach as well. I knew that if he fought us and won, Zach and I would both be dead, or too badly injured to protect you from his rage. I sensed his change, but I was caught up in my own fight, in worrying what you thought of me, if you were going to hate me for not telling you. For being something a lot of people would call a monster.”
He ran a finger over her silky cheek. “When you called out a warning that he was beginning to shift, I knew you weren’t afraid of me, that you didn’t hate me. You were warning me. I’m hoping that warning was because you might still love me. C’mon.” He took her hand and led her into the kitchen. Then he set the jar filled with punch on the counter, wrapped his hands around Nellie’s waist, and set her on the counter beside the jar. “Give me a minute.”
He walked to the cupboard, pulled out a couple of glasses and filled them with ice, then poured some of Meg’s punch into the two of them. Handing one to Nellie, he took the other for himself. “Will you toast to new beginnings, Nell? There is so much I need to tell you, but honestly, I don’t know where to start. I have to know, first. Can you still love me after what you know now? Or is this whole shape-shifting wolf thing a game changer?”
She took a sip of her drink and then studied him a moment, but her eyes were almost as bright as her smile. “Well, it’s definitely a game changer, but maybe not the way you think. I knew you were special from the beginning, but I fell in love with your wolf long before I knew how I felt about you, so knowing you two are a package deal is a plus. As far as loving you? Evan, that ship sailed before I left here last summer, but I never had the chance or the courage to say anything.” She slipped off the counter and headed into the front room, drink in hand.
Evan followed her. When she sat on the couch, he sat beside her, though not too close. She turned to him and rolled her eyes. Shrugging, he moved closer.
“Will you answer my questions?”
“I will.”
“Good. Okay, just how old are you guys, anyway? Cain’s a World War Two vet? That means he’s at least ninety, right?”
He shrugged. “More like a hundred and six or seven.” Her eyes got bigger. “He was born a little after the turn of the last century. I’m a little older, almost a hundred and fifteen. Trak’s brother Lawz is the oldest in the pack. He was born right around the start of the Civil War, in 1861. Trak’s three years younger.”
“Holy shit.” She slapped her hand over her mouth. “Sorry.” She took a bigger swallow of her drink. “This flips that whole ‘but how old are you in dog years?’ thing on its butt! But you all look about the same age. How?”
He was still chuckling over the dog years comment. This was sounding better all the time. “Werewolves only father male children. Our sons are like normal human kids until their late twenties, early thirties, when they go through their first shift. However old they are when that happens, that’s how old they stay. We think the shifting is the reason—it replicates our cells so the cells don’t age whenever we shift. There are some weres alive who came across with the Pilgrims. The truly older weres have shifted regularly all their lives, so it appears that the shifting is what helps keep us young. We all appear to have started out in Europe, though I’m not certain if anyone’s ever figured out exactly where or when.”
“Then what about the women? Are Cherry and the others old, too?”
“No, they just met their guys this summer. That’s sort of why we built Feral Passions, to get to meet women, but it was really weird because all of the women had pretty much figured out what we were before they actually agreed to be mated. Mating means the guy bites his woman.”
When Nellie grimaced, he leaned close and kissed her. “Not a bad bite, just a little nip to infect you with your mate’s saliva, but then you’ll go through a change and come out of it able to shift. The thing is, the change will put you into a deep sleep for at least twenty-four hours, and with all the uncertainty over Rube and his guys, Trak and I were afraid you’d be too vulnerable, sleeping like that. What if Rube prevailed and killed me or Trak? You’d be entirely helpless, and we couldn’t risk that.
“Another thing is that there’s always been a law among our kind, that we couldn’t tell anyone what we were, even a woman we loved and wanted to mate. We had to bite her first so she wouldn’t be able to go back to her people, but the rest of the guys and I are totally against that. It’s an old custom that goes back to ancient times when women weren’t nearly as sophisticated as they are now. None of us were, but their lives were really hard, so life as a shifter actually gave women freedom they couldn’t have otherwise.
“Times have changed and women have more options. Now it feels wrong not to tell you. If a woman chose not to change after finding out about us, she was in a position to give us away, and you can only imagine what would happen if the media got wind of our existence. Essentially, we felt the risk was worth it, because it’s a pretty big deal to spring on a woman.” He stared at his moccasins. “I was planning to tell you as soon as we got through the wedding. Trak doesn’t know that.”
“So all the women here are shape-shifters now? Even Meg?”
“Meg and Zach are completely human. They found out about us purely by accident, but they accept what we are and have promised to keep our secret. They love each other, love their work, and want to continue living perfectly normal human lives. Not aging makes it tough to do that. We have to avoid contact with people sometimes for years on end; then we can come back and tell people who used to know us that we’re actually our own children. That’s why some of us rarely go into town.”
“How’s that going to work for Darian? I mean, she’s on the news every night. How’s she going to carry that off?”
“Good makeup? I have no idea. That’s a problem we haven’t faced before. The same goes for Lawz. He’s been working for the state as an engineer for a long time now. At some point, he’ll have to change jobs, manufacture a new identity. Or he might just retire and take consulting jobs. That way he’d not always be working with the same people who might notice he doesn’t age.”
“It sounds like a lot of work.” She took another sip of her drink and then set the glass aside. “Why don’t you take me to bed?” She winked. “Where we can discuss this in more depth.”
Evan felt as if someone had just lifted a ton of bricks off his chest. Smiling, he stood and offered his hand to Nell. She put her hand in his and he pulled her to her feet. Laughing, she grabbed her drink and took it with her as he tugged her toward the stairs.