Lee

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The explosion hit and the first thing I noticed wasn’t the sound. It was the absence of it. The blast exposure had caused a temporary hearing loss, only I wasn’t cognizant of that at the time. Disorientation and confusion tossed me into a vortex of the unknown. I blinked once, twice, but nothing cleared my vision. Dizziness prevailed until I was aware that someone was dragging me by the strap of my vest. A face appeared in front of me with lips moving, but confusion reigned. Squinting, I thought maybe I could lip read, but words jammed in my throat like wooden blocks. It wasn’t that I couldn’t speak—I couldn’t breathe. With stark clarity, I knew I was facing my own death.

Dying is a strange thing. Instead of panicking, a sense of calm cocooned me. I was lying on a bed of fluffy down, embraced in the utmost comfort. All the months in the desert sand and heat were wiped away with the snap of my fingers and were replaced by joy and peace. From there I was transported to a crystal clear pool, somewhere near a tumbling waterfall. The aqua water was serenity to my senses as the water was nature’s own music. In the blink of an eye, I journeyed to a distant mountaintop with a view unlike any other. I was on top of the world able to see for miles and miles. Until …

Pain, unbelievable pain, sank its ruthless claws into me and viciously tore me away from my precious view tossing me straight into Hell. Muffled sound coming from a distance assaulted my ears. My vision cleared somewhat affording me a view of the chaos surrounding me. A medic shouted, “She’s coming around. I think she’s with us.” Where had I been? What happened? Focus, I needed to focus. Easy to say, difficult to do with the searing pain coming from my lower extremities. Not to mention, my hearing and sight made me believe I was lying in a cave somewhere.

Lifting my head, I only made it an inch or so before a hand gently pushed it back down.

“Easy there, soldier. You’re not going anywhere just yet.” Then an oxygen mask was placed over my mouth and I was lifted onto a stretcher. The blue sky above me tilted as my makeshift bed was carried to its next destination. Whatever happened must’ve been serious enough to warrant a med-evac because I was loaded into a helo. Moments later, the horizon dipped as we headed to a destination unknown and I drifted off.

The blank slate of my mind didn’t block out the annoying bleep of the alarm clock that some forgetful person wouldn’t shut off. If only I had the strength, I would get off my ass and turn the stupid thing off. Or better yet, pulverize it with a hammer. Who would dare to disturb my perfect sleep? When I found out, I was going to kill the motherfucker.

Bleep … bleep … bleep … bleep.

All right already. Stop that noise! Throwing the blankets off, I went to get out of bed and … what the hell! Where was I? There were people all over the place, lined up in hospital beds. Curtains were half drawn so it was hard to see. But I could hear them moaning. Christ, could I hear the moaning.

“Ah, you’re awake,” a friendly but unfamiliar voice said.

I shifted to see who it was. A doctor stood next to the bed, smiling. “How do you feel?”

My brows drew together because I wasn’t quite sure where to begin.

“I’m sure you have a lot of questions. Do you remember anything at all?”

My head slowly swiveled from side to side.

“I see. Well, I’m Dr. Keith Sanchez. Do you know where you are?

“In bed?” I answered lamely.

“Well, that, but you’re at Bagram. You do remember being in Afghanistan, right?”

Bagram Air Base. Afghanistan. Bam! Images dropped into place as the puzzle pieces fit perfectly together in my mind.

“I can see things are coming together for you. Do you remember what happened yesterday?”

Yesterday?

“I … I don’t think …” but then it all hit me. The IED. We were patrolling the streets of a village near Kandahar. The intel revealed there may be a terror cell operating nearby and that we should be on high alert. As we were walking I spotted an object, a harmless Coke can laying in the street, next to the curb. Normally, it wouldn’t have caught my eye, but it was the way the can was cocked up against the curb with a straw sticking out of the top that grabbed my attention. There was something about it that looked off.

Four of us walked in pairs and we were trained to trust our instincts. That day, I trusted mine. I yelled out as I grabbed my fellow soldier’s arm, jerking him behind me with as much force as my body contained. That’s when all hell broke loose. Using my body as a shield, I threw myself over him as the fire lit up the street.

“Jared? The others?” I asked.

The doctor smiled. “They’re all fine. Only minor lacerations, thanks to you.”

“It was the Coke can,” I muttered.

“Yes, so they said.”

“So how long will I be here?”

“We’re making sure you’re stabilized and then you’ll be transferred to Ramstein.”

“Ramstein? Germany?”

“Yes. Your injuries are greater than what we can treat here in the mobile unit.”

My voice hitched as I asked, “And what exactly are my … injuries.”

His kind brown eyes softened with what, precisely? Pity? Sympathy? This couldn’t be good. The V that formed between his brows further confirmed my suspicions.

“Corporal Marston, that IED did a whole lot of damage to you and you’re very lucky to be alive. But I’m sorry to inform you that you lost your left leg below the knee. Your right leg is also in pretty bad shape. We need to make some repairs because the bone is damaged, but we don’t have the capabilities to do it here. Our imaging isn’t state of the art either so it’s best if we get you to Ramstein ASAP.”

My hand automatically reached for my leg but I could only get as far as my knee. So I tried to sit up, but a surge of dizziness had me doing the fish flop.

“Take it easy. It hasn’t been that long since you came out of anesthesia.”

“I … I don’t get it. My calf and ankle hurt. How can that be if my leg is gone?” I wasn’t prepared to deal with this news.

“Phantom pain. You’ve heard of it, I’m sure.”

“But this is severe.”

“Yeah, it can be. No one really knows the cause, but it appears that your brain is getting mixed signals from your body and it manifests itself in the form of pain.”

Everything he said made my situation sound more than terrible. Was this my career ender? I was planning on being in the marines for the long term. Now what the hell was I going to do?