Bradley

 

I’m lying here listening to her soft snoring and feeling her heat in my arms as I think about the crazy week we just had.

Today, we go back to reality. A reality for me that does not include waking up with her. A reality where my meals are no longer shared with her. A reality void of her out of tune singing in the shower.

I’m going to really miss her sassiness. Fuck, that mouth of hers. Half the time I want to kiss it, the other half I want to fuck it, and I always love hearing what comes out of it. I might miss that the most.

“Faker.” She steals the line I’ve been using on her these past few mornings. “What time is it?” she asks, burrowing herself deeper into my side as she throws her leg over my hip.

“Almost ten.” I shift and adjust myself so I slide right into her. One last time.

She moans as I roll us so she’s on her back.

I hover over her while I continue to slide in and out of her. I bury my face in her neck, breathing her scent in. Her arms and legs wrap tightly around me. No words are exchanged, nothing is said. This is the bitter end. A tightness forms in my chest that I just know will linger long after we both finish.

I roll off her, lying next her on the bed. Neither of us says a word for a while. We just stare at the ceiling. She’s the first to break the moment by getting up, looking over me to check the bedside clock.

“Shit, it’s almost noon. We have to check out by one, right?” she says as she rises off the bed. “Do you want to order coffee? We can grab a bite at the airport. Plus, I still have to pack my new suitcase.”

She smiles over her shoulder at me, and it is that exact moment that my world is knocked off its axis when I realize I’m utterly and completely in love with her.

She doesn’t close the door, but I get up and start throwing all of my things into my bag. I don’t bother folding anything or placing them neatly into the suitcase.

I take a quick shower while she packs up her things. I dress and then head into the living room as she walks into the bathroom.

She closes the door, and I hear the shower go on. I rush to get my shit together and finish packing before she’s done. I can’t do this. I can’t do the whole “thanks, it’s been fun” scene.

I hear her singing in the shower and smile to myself. I walk over to take one last look at the view of the fountains and the strip. I turn and take in the bed, sheets, and pillows thrown askew.

The shower shuts off, and it’s my cue to leave. Coward! I scream at myself in my head. I grab my bags and slip out the door, closing it softly as I walk to the elevator, pressing the button repeatedly in a futile effort to make it come faster. It doesn’t work, but it takes my mind off her and stops me from turning to look at the door that still sits closed.

My feet almost take me back to it, but before I can turn and start walking, the elevator arrives and the doors open. I get on, turning to face the front as I watch my reflection in the doors.

I’m operating on autopilot. The valet gets me a cab as soon as he sees me.

“Is the Mrs. joining you?” he asks while he places my bag in the car.

I shake my head as I get in and wait to be taken to the airport.

I check in and then find a corner to cower in like the coward I am. My phone beeps in my pocket, and I’m expecting it to be Lexi delivering the ass chewing I deserve. Instead, it’s the airline alerting me that boarding will be taking place at a different gate.

I feel numb, like I’m floating outside of my body, watching everything playing out around me. Going through the motions, I hand the ticket agent my boarding pass and walk onto the plane, sitting down in my seat, not making eye contact with anyone.

“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. We would like to welcome you aboard this Virgin Airlines flight to New York LaGuardia. Flight duration is approximately four hours and fifty-five minutes, and we are expecting a fairly smooth flight today. Once again, thank you for choosing to fly with us today, and we hope you enjoy your flight.”

I sit back in my first-class seat, turning to look out the window while everyone is boarding, reflecting on the best week of my life. Well, it was the best week, until I fucked it up by being a coward and walking out.

One week, that was what we agreed on. One week, no strings, no attachments, that’s what we both said. But now here I sit on this bloody plane with an ache in my chest so deep, it hurts to breathe.

Walking out of that hotel room while she was in the shower was weak, a total cop-out. I know it. Fuck, I’m sure she knows it, too. But I just couldn’t do it. I just couldn’t say goodbye to her.

Holy shit. Did I really just leave her there alone in the hotel? My heart starts to race. Did I really just walk out of what was possibly the best thing to ever happen to me? My heart beats even faster now to the point that my chest starts to practically heave. I did. Oh my God, I just left her there. I just walked out on the woman I love. I have to go back. Shit, what the fuck am I doing here? I have to go back to her. I’m panicking now. I have to take off my seat belt and get off this plane. I can do that, right? God, I really hope so.

“Sir, would you care for any water or champagne?” the cute blond flight attendant from our inbound flight asks me.

I look up at her and her smile gets bigger.

“Excuse me,” I hear a voice that I didn’t expect to hear. “That’s my seat.”

The flight attendant steps aside, giving me a full view of the woman I just stupidly walked away from. She stands there, her gorgeous long legs—legs that were wrapped around my waist not long ago—on full display in black linen shorts.

I’ve become very intimate with those legs this past week. Her loose, pink top falls off her shoulder, giving a glimpse of her lightly tanned neck. The need to lean in and bite it, to mark her, makes my mouth water.

“My apologies, ma’am,” the flight attendant says, walking away.

I turn to watch her lift her bag to store it in the overhead bin. I’m about to get up and help her when a man sitting in the seat across from her springs up. He smiles at her, she smiles in return, and it’s in that moment that everything I was holding back snaps.

“I got it,” I tell Ape Face, grabbing the bag from him and storing it. “Do you want the window seat?” I ask her softly. Her smell guts me.

“Excuse me.” She walks away to speak to the flight attendant. Their conversation lasts maybe a couple of seconds, and the flight attendant who was just giving me a flirty smile a few moments ago is now giving me the stink eye as she frowns and shakes her head no to whatever Lexi is saying.

Lexi walks back to where I’m standing. “Great. Sold out.”

Okay, so now I know that she was most likely asking to have her seat moved. She is still panning the area, trying to see if there is another seat available.

“Love.” I’m about to grab her hand when her head snaps my way.

“Don’t you fucking call me that.” Her wounded eyes glare at me. “Asshole,” she says and then pushes past me to take the seat by the window. Ape Face looks over at me with a smug smirk across his face.

Whatever, man, she’s still sitting next to me.

I guess it’s a good thing, because I now have five hours to beg her to forgive me, to grovel if necessary, to do whatever it takes to win her over. I sit down, fasten my seat belt, and turn to talk to her, but she turns away from me in her seat. “Lexi…”

“Don’t talk to me,” she says, and I’m about to say something else when she continues, “Did you really leave me there? Alone? Without a goodbye, without even a note?”

“I fucked up,” I say.

“You forgot to leave money on the side table.” Her words are like a punch to the balls, a punch I clearly deserve if the hurt in her voice is anything to go by. “I can’t believe you did that to me,” she hisses out, while the plane starts to pull away from the gate and the flight attendants go through the safety procedures.

“I panicked, okay,” I finally say while the plane starts taxiing down the runway. I look over, and her eyes are closed as if she’s either sleeping or ignoring me.

I don’t say anything else until we are in the air. Once the seat belt light goes out, I unbuckle mine and turn to face her. Her eyes are open, her head leaning back on the seat while she looks out the window.

“I’m an asshole.” I figure starting off with the obvious is better than pleading my case right off the bat. “I was wrong.”

“You think?” She turns to face me, and I see that her eyes are red-rimmed and watery, like she’s been crying. I was wrong, I was so wrong. Seeing her with tears in her eyes and knowing that I put them there, that is so much worse than a kick to the balls. It’s like having a limb severed.

“Love.” I reach out to her, but she curls into herself, not letting me get anywhere close to her.

“You are such a bastard, Fitch.” She sits up, unbuckling her seat belt. “You left me there, like some bad one-night stand you couldn’t get away from quick enough.” She narrows her eyes. “I was in the shower, and you skulked out without so much as a goodbye. Who does that?”

I’m about to say something as she continues to glare at me and the flight attendant picks that moment to interrupt, asking if we would like anything to drink.

“He’ll have a cranberry juice,” she says, raising her voice. “He went to visit that brothel, you know, the one Lamar Odom was caught at?” The flight attendant’s face goes from smiling to shock. “I told him not to go, but you know how men with erectile dysfunction get when they finally get their hands on some Viagra. They think they’re a stallion.” She finishes by sharing a conspiratorial eye roll with the flight attendant.

The attendant nods her head like she actually does know what it feels like.

Lexi, not one to leave it well enough alone, continues, “Well, one too many of those women and now it’s leaking some nastiness. It’s all crusty down there, and it burns when he urinates.” Lexi points to my crotch as the flight attendant’s eyes follow her hand down to my crotch. My hands move in response to their scrutiny to cover it up.

“I’ll get that juice for you right away, sir.” She shakes her head as she turns to go get the cranberry juice that I do not need.

“Are you happy now?” I ask her, and I’m almost ready to bust out smiling. That sassy mouth is in for a workout tonight.

“Not even close to happy. You know what?” She turns in her chair. “We agreed to one week, no strings,” she says louder while Ape Face still looks on.

I turn to him. “Do you mind?” I ask.

He looks over at me. “Dude, how many girls did you make out with? Was one of them Candy or Temptress?”

“What?” I ask him.

“I was at that brothel. Me and my pals. For the whole weekend. I didn’t see you, man.” He continues like we are long lost friends.

“She was playing around. I wasn’t there.” I look at Lexi, who shakes her head no to him.

“Green, his penis is now oozing green.” She eggs him on.

“My friend had that, man. You know it takes about a month for that to go away? You can’t even whack the mole while you’re on the meds,” he explains, complete with the visual of his hand doing the motions of masturbating.

“Thanks.” I cut the conversation short and turn back to Lexi. “Jesus, love.”

“Don’t you ever call me that again.” She points her finger at me. “Never. Not again.” And while her words are strong, the waiver in her voice betrays her emotions. She turns in her chair, facing the window, but looking at me over her shoulder as she continues, “You lost that right.”

Jesus, just when I thought my chest couldn’t hurt any more, her words shred me.

“Listen to me.” I lean into her space as she tries to pull back from me. “I fucked up, and I admit it. I got scared. You want the truth? I don’t want the week to end. I don’t want to go home without you tonight. I want to see where this thing can go.” I’m almost yelling now. “Yes, it started off as a fling, but I’ll be the first to admit that it soon changed, and it became so much more than that for me.” I grab her hand, holding my breath and praying she doesn’t snatch it back. After two seconds when she doesn’t, I kiss it and continue, “We are good, so good together.” My thumb traces the lines inside her palm. “I don’t know how this works. I don’t even know the right way to do this.” I finally look up at her. “I’ve never done this, but I want to.” My hand cups her cheek. “I want to with you.” I turn to see that most of the people in first class have now turned in their seats and are watching us.

“Dude, that was deep,” Ape Face says.

I nod at him in agreement, then continue nodding while I look at everyone else.

“My brother isn’t going to be happy,” she says finally.

“I know.” That feeling of dread I’ve been carrying in my chest since I woke up this morning finally starts to dissipate. “But this isn’t about him, Lexi. It’s me and it’s you, and if we’re happy, he’ll come around. Eventually.”

“Are you sure?” she ask me. “Melanie has no problems helping me get rid of a body.” She finally leans into me. “Plus, it’s not like anyone is going to miss a British guy in New York anyway.”

“I haven’t been more sure of anything in my life.” I lean into her. “Now give me a kiss.”

“I’m not kissing you,” she says, turning her face while I look at her through eyes that I know are glaring at her. “These people think you were with multiple hookers and now have an infection in your penis. I’m not catching that.” She’s ridiculous, but it’s just another thing I love about her.

“That’s okay, save your energy.” I lean in to whisper in her ear, “FYI, I’m going to be sticking my non-infected penis deep in that sassy mouth tonight.” I kiss her ear softly as I see her fighting her smile.

“Promises, promises.”

“Honestly, I’m so sorry I did that to you.”

“I forgive you. This time. Next time, though? Not going to be so forgiving. Oh, and Melanie might be torching your apartment as we speak.” She shrugs. “Is there Wi-Fi on this plane? I should probably send her a message to abort mission.” She doesn’t say anything else. Instead, she just puts her chair back and curls up, closing her eyes.

“You got lucky, man,” I hear Ape Face say to me from across the aisle. “If that were my ex, she would have called TSA and told them I had a gun in my bag or was a drug mule or some shit.”

“She sounds lovely,” I tell him, while I reach over and wrap my hand around her thigh.

I settle back in my seat. I turn to look out the window, watching the clouds drift by, and I finally release the breath it feels like I’ve been holding all day. I’m so thankful right now that she forgave me and that I won’t be going home without her.

We are landing right as she wakes up.

“I’m hungry,” she grumbles from beside me.

“We’ll stop and get something before we go to my place,” I say as I stand to grab her bag and hand it to her.

She walks off the plane ahead of me, and I smile at the attendant, who smirks at me while looking at my crotch.

She slows her steps so I can catch up and slips her hand into mine. A perfect fit. I let go of her hand, wrapping my arm around her shoulders and bringing her closer to me by hugging her. She looks up at me, so I lean down and kiss her soft lips.

We are both here waiting for our bags when her bag comes out first. It’s her bag that was lost in Columbia last week. “Assholes,” she says as she reaches to grab it. I laugh at the irony. We gather the rest of our luggage and head outside.

We grab a cab together, stopping first at her place. We walk up to the door, and I’m surprised when it isn’t locked. Anyone can just go right in.

“Is the door broken?” I ask, following her as she walks up a flight of stairs to the elevator.

“Um, yeah. It’s been that way for a while.” She presses the button while I look back at the door. “I gave up complaining.” The elevator arrives with a creak.

We finally make it to her door, and she unlocks it. She opens it up, letting herself and then me in. It’s the size of a shoebox. Actually, some shoeboxes are bigger than this.

“Okay, just let me pack a bag, plus my computer, and then we can go. Have a seat,” she says before walking into her room.

I look around and take in her apartment as I sit down on her tiny sofa. It may be small, but her decorating style makes the place feel cozy, like you wouldn’t mind curling up and staying for a while. Little touches of Lexi are all over. A throw blanket tossed over the couch, a television mounted on the wall, a collection of different sized picture frames scattered on the walls. I walk over and start looking at her pictures.

I find one of us, well, with Sterling, that is. It was at our graduation party. She and Sterling are both looking at the camera, smiling huge. But me? My eyes are on Lexi. Even back then. I take the frame off the wall to look at it more closely. Lexi is in between Sterling and me. Sterling’s arm is around her shoulder, while mine rests on top of his. Lexi’s arm hangs between her and Sterling, but her other one is around my waist.

“Ready.” She comes out of the room and walks up to me. “I love that picture.” Her fingers trace over us.

“I want it,” I tell her. I want all of it. “Can I have this?”

“Um.” Her eyes look surprised. “I can get you a copy if you want.”

“Right, right, I’m sorry.” I shake my head. “This is yours.” I put it back on the wall. “All set?” I ask her, picking up the small bag that she packed. “Is that it?”

“Yeah. I only packed for tonight.” She walks to the fridge and grabs a bottle of water.

“Okay, let’s go.”

We walk out of her building to the corner where I have an Uber waiting.