Twelve
“Back so soon? And where is our mulberry woman/man? I thought you’d have the native’s trinkets offloaded by now and be knocking balls with our herm-aphrodites.”
Pace howled in outrage and punched a wall. “You knew? You knew and didn’t tell me?”
“To badly quote a good witch, ‘You had to find out for yourself, you sorrowful schlemiel.’ I might have seen her shift when she headed for the bathroom.”
Pace wound up for a tirade, but Calamity cut him off.
“Uh-uh. Shut your trap and listen. If I had told you the truth last night, you would have gone back to Lola and made a romp of yourself. I can just hear you sticking your big, ugly foot in it. ‘I’m back, my virtuous violet, because even though my insecurity couldn’t imagine a dick anywhere but up my own ass, I’m okay now that I know it will be yours.’ Catch my drift?”
Pace deflated. “It wouldn’t have gone like that. But I probably would have blown it.” He sighed. “And for your information, I’m a pitcher, not a catcher.”
“TMI,” Calamity returned. “God spare me from beings with orifices. Now, change the subject and tell me. Where’s Lola?”
“She’s been kidnapped.”
“Oh, hell no,” Calamity growled, sounding just like him. “So what are we going to do about it, ready ranger?”
Pace strode farther into the ship, headed for the captain’s seat. “Those men you saw lurking about yesterday… I’m sure they’re the ones who’ve taken her. They’ve demanded I meet them on a lawless planet between here and Mall in…” He looked at his watch, “two hours. We’re supposed to give them the treasure in exchange for Lola.”
Calamity gave a chirp of laughter. Not what Pace expected. He almost started yelling again, but his ship cut him off.
“Then it’s a good thing I remained suspicious of the trio, isn’t it?”
“Oh, Calamity, please tell me you have something that will help get Lola back.”
“Video footage coming up. I took it as they went back to their so-called ship.” She actually snorted.
The large monitor filled with a surprisingly clear picture of the three rogues. All rough looking with enormous noses, eyes like birds on either side of their beaks and too much forehead for the small brains that probably lay behind. Without even imagining they could be under surveillance, they walked across three bays to a broken-down hunk of space debris.
“Zoom in, please, Clam.” Pace got excited. If they could get the name or call letters off the ship, he’d be able to ask Mall’s tracking tower where the craft had headed. He snapped his fingers. “Bingo.”
“You’ve got it?” Calamity asked.
“I just told you. Bingo, with call letters G57.”
“You’re seriously kidding me, right? Nobody names their ship Bingo.”
“Must have been a favorite dog or something. Now pipe down for a minute while I call Mall and talk to the tower.”
He punched the code into his communication set. “Calamity E42 to Mall control.”
“Yes, 42? Can we help you?”
“You can. This morning, probably before dawn, a colleague of mine went off-planet in a ship designated Bingo G57. I wonder if you could give me his coordinates upon departure.”
“One moment, please.” He heard a click as he was put on hold. The most hideous music wafted through the speakers. Pace grimaced and turned the volume down. There should be a rule that certain customs couldn’t traverse galaxies.
A click once again sounded. “I have that information for you, sir. Shall I send it to your ship’s computer?”
“Yes, please.”
“It will only show the course to two thousand light years away.”
“That’s fine. Thank you.” Hopefully that would be far enough to point in the direction of their ultimate destination.
Pace hung up. There were some good things about a non-warring galaxy. They were free with their information, not suspicious of everyone and everything in it.
“Do you have it, Calamity?” Pace asked after a minute of silence.
“It’s coming in now,” she answered.
“Okay. On screen.”
An image of surrounding space came up, a computer-generated trail delineating the direction of the ship when it left Mall.
“Funny. That trail doesn’t look two thousand light years long,” he speculated, his hands going to the controls to measure the distance.
“It’s not.” Calamity beat him to it. “At precisely one thousand, seven hundred and twenty-two light years, their trajectory stops.”
“Enhance.” Pace couldn’t keep the excitement from his voice. Sure, the stream led in the direction of the planet where they were supposed to meet, but the ship had stopped. Maybe they were catching some shut-eye before the meeting, or maybe… His adrenaline spiked.
“Look at that, Clam. It’s an unmarked asteroid. Can we magnify to get a look at its surface?”
“Sure thing, my shoddy Sherlock. Mag 100… Mag 1K… Mag 10K…”
“There!” Pace jabbed at the screen with his finger. “It’s a structure. And right next to it is their ship.”
“Got ‘em dead to rights, soldier,” Calamity drawled, doing her best John Wayne.
“Right. Now we just need to sneak up on them and get our girl back.”
“You have a plan?”
“Yup. All we need to do is borrow a pod from the LEV station at The Plains.”
In one of their many discussions, Lola had told him how she’d made it to Mall and how she expected to sneak home. He was glad he’d payed attention instead of being distracted by her gorgeous lips.
“Skids up, headed to The Plains,” Calamity told him.
This time, it felt good to be back in the air.
Pace punched in the frequency for G-Hydrox. “Calamity E42 to G-Hydrox tower.”
“You have the tower, 42.”
“Tell your Lord that we need to borrow a pod. We’re headed to The Plains to load one up.”
“One moment, please.”
Pace was ahead of the curve this time and turned down the volume before being auditorily assaulted by hold music. “Hah!” he felt vindicated, even though only Calamity witnessed the smooth move.
“Uh, 42?”
“Yes, control?”
“Lord Shmegma strongly suggests you may not have access to that equipment.”
“Strongly suggests, huh? Hold that thought.” Pace jumped up from his chair and took off down the hallway. “Maintain course, Clam!”
Thirty seconds later, in the cargo hold with crowbar in hand, Pace ripped the covers off one carton after another, looking for something appropriate. There. He picked up an item from its nest of packing, tossed it into the air and deftly caught it. This would do the trick.
He made fast tracks back to the bridge. “Control? I’m sending you a picture of an amethyst the size of my fist.” Pace didn’t know if it had any actual value, but being a purple stone, he guessed the Hydroxene Lord would love it. He snapped a shot and sent it off. “Let Lord Shmegma see that. Tell him I’ll leave it in possession of The Plains manager as collateral for the pod.”
Pace tapped his foot impatiently as he awaited word.
“The Lord agrees to your terms, sir.”
“Great.”
Pace wasted no more time on niceties. He hit the disconnect and got ready to land at The Plains.
****
So far, everything had gone according to plan. Pace had brought Calamity to the far side of the asteroid and cloaked. Because of the unfavorable, inhospitable atmosphere on the rock, he suited up as they hovered in space until they saw the kidnapper’s ship take off. Now came the unknown. There were three possible scenarios.
One, the ship departed with the thieves and Lola on board, so when he landed in the pod, he’d find nothing but an empty building. Then he’d have to start planning for what he’d do when he met them at their stupid rendezvous point.
Two, Lola and one or two rogues had left, the others remaining. He would barter those remaining for Lola. Also not optimal, but he’d work with it.
And three, a much more appealing situation, one or two of the bandits had gone off to the meeting point and left Lola in the shack, guarded. He could work with that.
“Okay, Clam. Wish me luck. Time to rock ‘n’ roll.”