“EXCUSE ME,” I say, pasting a fake smile on my lips as I bump into a partygoer. My teeth press so hard into one another I can feel the tension in my temples, my jawbones aching from the pressure.
Fighting tears, I scan the penthouse full of people with nothing more on their minds than how much to drink. Jealousy is not something I wrestle with most days, but standing in my too-tight dress in too-high heels and with too much uncertainty wracking my emotions, I’m insanely envious of them all.
The crowds part just enough for me to spot my brother, a good head taller than ninety percent of the attendees, on the far side of the room next to the bar. Again, I go sorting through the faces and will myself to calm down before Finn starts asking questions.
“Hey,” he says, stalling his beer bottle mid-air when he sees me coming. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m not feeling well.” I flip my gaze to Poppy as her eyes grow wide. “I need to go home.”
“I’ll go with you,” she says instantly.
“Stay here and have fun. I’m fine.”
“What’s wrong, Layla?” my brother asks, the bottle now at his side. “What happened?”
I brush a hand through the air and lie my ass off. “Nothing. I ate a ham sandwich from Yusi’s for lunch. Now that I think about it, I think I saw somewhere they had a health code violation last month. I’m probably just having a little food poisoning.”
“Which is why I should go with you,” Poppy says. “You shouldn’t be poisoned alone. You might want someone to call Yusi’s and rip them a new asshole and I’m just the person to do it.”
“I eat there all the time. I haven’t heard that,” Finn says.
“Yusi needs his cock removed from his body and shoved down his throat.” Maybe it’s said with too much gusto, but I’ve never said something that I mean more.
“Wow. That’s harsh,” Finn laughs. “Okay. You guys go but take it easy on Yusi. He probably didn’t even make the sandwich.”
“Oh, he made it . . .” I start, then stop with Finn’s brow crooks. “Goodnight, Finn.”
Poppy kisses my brother and takes my elbow. She lead-blocks and we make it through the crowd without seeing Branch.
The elevator ride is long and hot and the walk to the parking garage even longer. Each step is like another rung on a ladder with the seat of my car being the top tier. I slide into the passenger’s seat and it’s instant. The tears come.
Poppy leans over the console and wraps me in her arms, holding me tight. “What did that fucker say to you?”
“Oh, that I’m a whore.”
She pulls back, a look of ferocity in her eyes, and grabs the door handle. “I’ll be right back.”
“No! Pop, stay,” I say, jerking on her arm. “He didn’t say that. Not outright. Just insinuated that it couldn’t be his. That I was either lying or pinning a bastard child on him.”
Digging through the glove compartment, I find a handful of napkins and start wiping away the smeared mascara from my cheeks.
“I have to say I’m surprised.” Poppy shakes her head. “I thought he’d be more of a man than this.”
“I knew he’d be in shock. I mean, look at what I’m dropping on his lap. But he was just so . . . dismissive. Fuck him.”
“No. No more fucking him,” she cracks. “You’ve already sucked more from that man than you wanted.”
“Really, Poppy?”
“Too soon?”
“Much, much too soon.” I toss the napkins on the floorboard, my tears dried up with the anger that’s taking the lead. “Will you take me to the store for ice cream before we go home?”
She lifts my purse and grabs the keys and sticks one in the ignition. Moving the car into reverse, she stops and turns to me before letting off the brake.
“Regardless of what he chooses to do about this,” she says, “this is an amazing time of your life. I know you didn’t expect it now or even want it now, but you’re having a baby,” she whispers. A slow smile spreads across her thin cheeks. “We’re going to give you a few days to let this settle and then we’re celebrating you and my little niece or nephew. If Branch opts out of that, his loss.”
My head falls to the seatback as I watch her pilot my car through the parking garage. Her words soothe me, and by the time we get out onto the street, I’m drifting off to sleep.
“SORRY. SORRY.” MY sight is blurry as I look at the face in front of me. “I didn’t get you wet, did I?”
My arm is extended in front of me, trying to balance the drink that just splashed into the air when I tripped. It continues to slosh, the cool, amber liquid running over my hand.
“What the hell is wrong with you?” Finn comes out of nowhere, despite my best attempt to avoid him.
Truth be told, I should’ve fucking left. I should’ve gotten in my car and driven my ass home and gotten away from all this. Despite my inebriated state, this I know. This I regret. But I didn’t want to go home alone with too much quiet to think about what Layla said. And the look in her eye. And the words she said after I said my piece. And the way she stormed off.
Bringing the cup to my mouth, I start to suck the rest of it down before Finn snatches it up.
“Hey,” I protest, grabbing wildly at the glass. “I wasn’t done.”
“You were done three drinks ago, buddy.”
“Funny. I need three more.”
“Let’s go.”
His palm cupping my shoulder, he guides me towards the door. Women pull on my hand, lure me towards them as we pass, but Finn isn’t having it. He just thrusts me on.
“Maybe I want to stay,” I say.
“Maybe you need to go to bed before you start looking a lot less like the Branch Best you want the world to remember.”
The alcohol finally reaches critical mass and everything goes fuzzy. Warmth hits my toes, the top of my head feeling like it’s missing in a great way, and before I know it, I’m in the passenger’s seat of Finn’s car. As we pull out of the garage, I see Poppy’s purse on the floorboard.
“Finn!” I shout.
“What?” He jumps, hitting the brake.
“You forgot Poppy.”
“Asshole,” he chuckles, accelerating again. “You scared the fuck out of me. I thought I was ready to hit a kid or something.”
“Is she in here?” I crane my neck to check the backseat.
“She took Layla home a few hours ago. Something is up with my sister.”
Slinking back into the seat, I close my eyes. “Is that right?”
“My guess is Callum, but I don’t know. She was ready to cry, all agitated and shit. If that fucker is bothering her, we’re taking a road trip and I’m going to dismantle that cocksucker.”
I sink further into the leather.
“Layla is too nice for her own good,” he continues. “I told her not to trust him, told her guys in this league aren’t really marriage material. You know what goes on during away games and hotel nights and at the parties. Shit, remember our first team party night?” he chuckles. “Those guys getting hotel rooms at our hotel for their side pieces and you and I were like, ‘What the fuck?’ having just met their actual wives the week before.”
“Yeah.”
“We’re professional athletes, man. These guys are used to getting whatever the fuck they want whenever they want. And Callum, he’s the worst.”
“The Quarterback Effect,” I say. “They love calling the shots, the attention, and the glory.”
“I’ll show him fucking glory,” Finn growls, taking a hard right through the streets of downtown.
My breathing is shallow as I imagine how fast it would take for his fist to hit my face if I told him exactly why his sister was upset tonight. I’m guessing three seconds, giving him two for time to process.
My life is so beyond fucked up right now and I don’t see a way out. The acid of anxiety hits my liquored-up stomach and I start heaving.
“Don’t puke in my car,” Finn says, sliding the car over two lanes and into the parking lot of a grocery store with a half-lit sign.
I press open the door and expel my guts, the alcohol burning almost as much as my head. Everything parades through my mind like the clouds on a bright day that zoom by. It’s like each thought—Layla, the baby, Finn’s reaction, Callum—shoot by, taunting me with their state of undoneness.
Finn hands me a warm water bottle and I don’t question it. I just fill my mouth, swish it around, and spit onto the gum-riddled pavement.
“You okay?” he asks as I shut the door.
“No.”
He shoots me a curious glance and pulls back out on the road in silence, which is good, because anything I have to say would test out that three-second theory.