“You sure you don’t want to tell me what we’re doing?” I ask Jesse as we climb what seems like the fortieth flight of stairs. “I mean, if you thought I needed a workout you could just come out and say it.”

He smirks, grabbing my hand and picking me up, holding me in front of his chest and climbing the remaining dozen flights of stairs with a spring in his step. I love how it feels to be carried by him, like I weigh nothing at all. He sets me down when we reach the roof and I gasp, taking in the view of the city stretched out beneath us. I feel a little rush of vertigo and swoon, but Jesse is right beside me to steady me on my feet.

“This is beautiful,” I say, a little breathlessly.

He pulls me close to his side protectively. “Yeah. See that?” he asks, pointing to a helicopter banking in the distance and heading our way.

“Yes…” I say. “Why?”

He says nothing, just watching and looking obnoxiously pleased with himself.

What are you up to, Jesse Slade? I press a hand to my stomach, feeling a wave of fear and excitement pass through me. I want to tell him, but I’m terrified at the same time. I think I know how he’ll react, but I could be wrong. Maybe I’ll just say it. Just blurt the words out. I’m pregnant.

I clutch Jesse a little tighter when it looks like the helicopter is about to crash right into the building. The nose pulls up at the last second, blasting us with strong wind while the helicopter maneuvers into position and lands on a slightly raised portion of the roof. Jesse gestures grandly for me to follow him. I take his hand, not quite understanding what’s going on, but excited nonetheless.

“I’ve never been in a helicopter!” I yell, shouting to be heard over the rotating blades.

He helps me up into the passenger area, where I sit in one of two seats and watch Jesse hop inside, looking spectacular in his black suit and gray dress shirt. I’m wearing a somewhat revealing green dress because he told me to wear something nice and because I love the way he looks at me when I wear this dress in particular. Jesse’s eyes always have a way of drinking me in like he’s the thirstiest man alive and I’m a tall, cold glass of water, but when I wear this it’s just a little more pronounced, and what can I say, I can’t get enough of being wanted by him. It’s like a drug to me.

He reaches over and helps me with the straps of my seat belt, buckling me in and grabbing a headset hanging on the side of the chair and carefully placing it over my ears and moves the microphone into place. He gets himself strapped in and puts on his headset next.

“Can you hear me?” he asks.

I see his lips move but can’t hear anything except the sound of his voice through the headset, slightly robotic, but perfectly clear.

“Yeah!” I shout, giving him a thumbs up.

He grins. “You don’t have to yell. The microphone will pick it up.”

I blush. “This is amazing,” I say, making a point of using a more normal voice.

He leans forward, slapping the pilot on his shoulder. The helicopter jolts beneath me as we lift into the air. There are no doors, which admittedly unsettles me, but Jesse is close enough that I can reach out and hold his hand--which I do--and the harnesses of the seat feel secure. Before long, I’m lost in the view, watching the city crawl by beneath us, marveling at how this perspective makes it all seem so much different, so small and insignificant, but also at how a little distance makes it seem so clean and beautiful.

Jesse places a small black box in my lap. My fingers brush over the velvety material coating the box and my chest constricts. My eyes dart to his, questioning.

“Open it,” he says, face serious.

I crack the box open and my breath hitches. The most beautiful ring I’ve ever seen sparkles up at me from the box, catching every single hint of light and spraying it into every color imaginable. It’s a delicate, classic, and exactly the type of ring I always dreamed of wearing. “This is…” I say, confusion and surprise in my voice.

“Will you?” he asks.

Yes. The word erupts in my mind. It explodes. Yes. Absolutely yes. A thousand times, yes. Tears well in my eyes. “Of course,” I say, voice thick.

He bites his lip and leans over, gently pulling my face toward his to kiss me.

“Was this whole helicopter thing just so you would have an excuse not to get on your knees in front of me?”

His smirk is sinful when he pulls back from the kiss. “I’m planning to get on my knees in front of you--tonight.”

It feels like all the blood in my body rushes to my cheeks when I think about his head between my legs. It feels like I’m floating, and it has nothing to do with the fact that in a way I technically am. It’s too perfect. Everything is so perfect I’m afraid it will slip away if I stop to think about it for too long. Jesse has been an instant hit on the show, and we’ve even been getting offers from some big names in the movie business now. Hubert lost his case and is going to be spending twenty-five years behind bars, largely in part because of his confession and Liam’s phone, which mysteriously found its way to the police. Kennedy broke up with that idiot she was dating and has started seeing someone I like for her, for once.

I can’t fix my past. That will never be clear or perfect. I’ll always be scarred and the memories of pain will never quite leave me. But I’m moving into the future with Jesse now, and I feel in my heart that he’ll always be by my side, always holding my hand and protecting me, keeping my past from catching up with me and making sure my future shapes up to be something out of my childhood fantasies. Well, I was too innocent to even daydream about some of the things Jesse does to me behind closed doors, but still.

I suck in a deep breath and look over to him. “I’m pregnant.”

Jesse looks into my eyes, his brows closing together and his eyes widening. “You’re not just fucking with me?”

“Not fucking with you,” I say a little nervously.

“Holy shit,” he says, sliding the ring on my finger when he realizes he still hasn’t. He swallows hard. “You have no idea how fucking happy that makes me.”

I grin. “You just stole my line.”

* * *

I watch Makayla and our two girls, Paisley and Amelia enjoying the Montana countryside outside our lakehouse. Paisley is coming up on her third birthday now in a few months, which I’m sure is going to be just as meticulously planned by Makayla as the last two were, and Amelia just had her first birthday a few weeks ago. My girls. The thought brings a smile to my face as I admire the way the setting sun casts a blazing outline around the three of them.

Makayla tucks a strand of golden hair behind her ear, long eyelashes on display as she looks down at the bright purple flower she’s showing to Amelia, who she holds at her side. Paisley stands at her other side looking girly as hell with two huge bows holding up her hair, which is exactly the same color as her mother’s.

It’s a perfect evening--one of many I never thought I’d have--and I’m enjoying every fucking second of it.

We’re in our vacation home out in Montana because the countryside is beyond perfect this time of year. Big sky, big mountains, and bigger views. It’s a place to make me forget about everything except what matters: my wife, my kids, and spending time together as a family. We spend our mornings cooking over an open fire outside our sprawling lakehouse. Sure, we have all the facilities of a small hotel inside the mansion, but we still come outside every morning and start the fire. Makayla and the girls come outside wrapped in blankets and looking to snuggle through the morning chill.

We eat charred bacon and smooth eggs while the rising sun bounces off the ice-capped mountains in the distance and across the lake. We waste the daylight away in the lake, laughing and playing games or just relaxing and listening to the sounds of the breeze rustling through the grass and trees. At night we huddle together, whether it’s inside with a movie and a big blanket or outside around the fire, just talking and telling stories.

Out here I can almost forget what kind of life we’ve made for ourselves back in the real world. I can forget that Makayla and I draw more attention from the paparazzi than any other celebrity couple, and if we’re not careful, we end up surrounded by a swarm of flashbulbs and clicking lenses.

But I wouldn’t trade it away. Not a single part. I’ve made a life with Makayla I don’t deserve. I know that deep in my chest. I’d be lying if I said the war doesn’t still come back to me, or even some of the things I had to do to keep Makayla safe. When I find myself far from family and in quiet moments, the images do come back, but it’s getting better.

Makayla sits down beside me in the grass, propping Amelia up in my lap.

“She was asking for you,” says Makayla with a grin.

I smile down at Amelia, who is always ready to flash her three teeth at a moment’s notice.

“Hey there, you pretty little thing,” I say, tickling her chest and loving the giggles it produces.

Paisley tackle-hugs me from the side. “Am I a pretty lil’ thing, Daddy?”

“You’re a pretty little-bit-bigger little thing,” I say.

Paisley laughs. “Lil’ bit bigger--lil’...” she trails off and laughs more when she can’t manage to get the words out.

“Run to the cooler and grab some graham crackers, chocolate, and marshmallows, okay?” says Makayla.

Paisley nods, running off in a more-or-less straight line, only stopping a few times to swat at the lightning bugs that are just starting to come out.

Makayla leans her head into my shoulder and I pull her in closer, trying to keep Amelia from breaking free with my other hand.

“I love you,” Makayla says. “I love this.”

“I love you too,” I say. I plant a kiss on the top of her head and breathe in the smell of her shampoo. It smells like comfort to me now, like home and happiness all rolled into one, and I can’t get enough of it. “I think you had the rough end of the bargain when it came to the whole bringing kids into the world thing, but I wouldn’t change a thing if I went back.”

“Me either. Except I might have slapped you a little harder when I first saw you after all that time. I think I let you off too easy.”

I smirk, watching while Paisley comes stomping back to land beside us with the loot from the cooler.

“You don’t think you made me pay enough?” I ask. “What about all the hoops you made me jump through those first few days. Or that guy you showed up to the red carpet event with, what was his name?”

“Hunter, I think,” she says with a mischievous grin. “He was cute.”

“Don’t try to make me jealous,” I say. “You know what happens when I get jealous.”

“I do. That’s exactly why I’m trying to make you jealous,” she snaps back with a suggestive wiggle of her eyebrows.

“What happens when daddy gets jealous?” asks Paisley with all the innocence of a two-year-old.

“He…” stammers Makayla, cheeks flushing. “He makes Mommy scream.”

“Because he’s mean to you?” asks Paisley.

I grin. “No. When daddy gets jealous, he gets extra nice.”

“Then why does mommy scream?”

Makayla shoots me an amused look when Paisley isn’t looking, obviously interested in what kind of answer I’m going to come up with.

“Because…” he says slowly, grabbing Paisley and lifting her over his head. “I give her ice cream! And we all scream for ice cream!”

“Ice cream!” shouts Paisley, giggling and pulling at my hands as I spin her overhead and take her toward the house.

As much as I love spending time with Jesse and the girls, nothing quite beats the evenings we spend after they go to bed. Paisley and Amelia went down about half an hour ago and I can still hear the white noise from the baby monitor that sits beside us on the dock.

“I still can’t believe there are so many stars,” I say, leaning my head back into Jesse’s lap and looking up at the sky. “I guess living my whole life in cities made me think it was normal for the night sky to be some weird shade of green or orange with just a few specks of light.”

“Beautiful,” he says quietly, but he’s looking straight down at me with a half-cocked smile.

I bite my lip. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say you’re trying to seduce me.”

“You always were perceptive.”

“I don’t know,” I say playfully, making a show of stretching and yawning. “I’m pretty tired. I think I could just fall asleep right here on this comfy lap of yours.”

“Somehow I think I could keep you up. All fucking night,” he adds with a dark grin.

My breath catches. It doesn’t matter how many times he’s had me or how many times I’ve roamed his body with my hands. Jesse Slade can still take my breath away. He still makes my stomach flutter like we’re on our first date and holding hands for the very first time. He still has me waking up like a little girl on Christmas morning, so excited to start my day and spend time with him and the girls that I couldn’t sleep in if I tried.

He’s my everything. My rock. My husband. Even thinking it after nearly four years of marriage makes my heart swell.

Jesse moves out from under my head and makes me suck in a surprised laugh when he lifts me effortlessly, carrying me to the grass a few yards away. He lays me down and the soft grass tickles the bare skin of my shoulders and neck.

“Are you wet for me, my wife?” Jesse’s says as his lips skate across the sensitive skin of my neck, raising goose bumps in their wake. I tilt my head, giving him further access, loving how he always knows exactly where to flutter soft kisses and where to nip and suck my skin to drive my desire higher.

“Why don’t you find out?” I say with a teasing smile.

He quirks up one sculpted brow in a way that says he accepts my challenge.

Yay me.

Jesse slowly undresses me, running his hands over every inch of skin that he exposes to the chilly night air until I’m completely naked. The soft grass against my naked body brings me back to the first time we made love under the stars like this. Everything was a mess back then, our lives were in danger, our relationship was in disarray—it seemed like the only thing we had in store for us was more heartache.

I’m looking up at the same stars, but everything about this night is different. No one is out to kill us, Jesse is my husband, the father of my children, and we are happy. Totally, completely—blissfully—happy.

Jesse kisses me passionately, then trails a line of kisses down my body, pausing just above my mound. He looks up at me with desire burning bright in his eyes, he wants to taste me just as badly as I want him to. His tongue swipes through my folds and I moan in pleasure.

I bury my hands in his hair, holding onto him as if he could disappear if I were to let go. But with the way his mouth is devouring my pussy, maybe I should be more worried about him making me burst into a million pieces and not if he’s going to disappear. His tongue spears into my opening, fucking me with it like it’s his cock. The warm, wet feel of it is indescribable… I love it, but I want more. Need more.

“Jesse,” I gasp. “Please…”

He raises his head, looking up at me. His mouth shines with my juices and I want those sexy lips on mine. I want him to kiss me, deep and hard, I want to taste the way I taste on his tongue. I never thought I would want something so dirty. In fact, there was a time I would have thought it was disgusting, but with Jesse, I’ve found there are many, many things I enjoy that I would’ve never tried before him.

“Please what?” he says with his patented smirk. The one that says, I know what you are thinking, but I’m going to make you beg for it.

Good thing I’m not above begging. Before I can beg for his cock, he pushes two fingers inside me, crooking them in a come hither motion, but the slowness at which he moves them only ramps up my need without taking me to the place where I’ll find release. It’s delicious, but not what I want.

“More, I want more,” I beg.

His eyes never leave mine as his mouth lowers and his tongue snakes out, licking over my clit. My nipples pebble into stiff peaks and I shudder at the sensation, but it’s still not enough. From the mischievous look in his eyes, he knows it’s not enough. Bastard.

“Fuck me,” I moan… well, more like wail, but I’m getting desperate now. “Jesse, I need your cock. Please.”

I’m begging… With each swipe of his tongue, I chant out a hushed ‘please’ over and over until he rises above me, kneeing my thighs further apart, to make room for what’s to come.

I shiver in excitement when he runs his cock up and down my slit, for a maddening minute, all he does is move his tip from my entrance to my clit and back again, spreading my wetness, and I start to worry that he’s not done teasing me. Finally, after minutes, hours, days, he notches his cock at my opening and pushes himself in one thick inch at a time. His eyes are downcast, watching himself disappear into my body, I rise up on my elbows and follow his gaze, taking in the erotic sight. My pussy stretches impossibly to accommodate his thickness, but the part that drives me wild is when he pulls back and his cock is gleaming wet with proof of my excitement.

Jesse’s lips meet mine in a breathtakingly sweet kiss. I get caught up in his languorous thrusts and tender kisses that I’m taken by surprise when I find myself flat on my back, Jesse’s strong fingers entwined with mine as he pins my hands above my head. The spark of heat that flashes through his eyes is the only warning I get before he slams his cock inside me, setting a brutal pace. Each thrust is harder than the last until the lewd sounds of slapping skin and our moans of pleasure fill the silence of the night.

“I’m gunna…” I say as my climax barrels down on me.

“Yes, cum for me,” he growls. “Cum all over my cock.”

My back arches and I throw my head back as I scream Jesse’s name. His rhythm never falters. He keeps fucking me straight through one orgasm and into a second. Just when I don’t think I can take anymore, I feel him swell inside me and a rush of heat splashes over my walls.

Jesse collapses on top of me, barely catching himself before he crushes me with his strong body. He brushes and errant hair away from my face, then drops a tender kiss to my lips.

“I love you, Makayla.”

I couldn’t respond if I wanted to. All I can do is lay back, feeling like I might melt into the Earth and dissolve there into a puddle of happy, satisfied bliss.

We may have more money than most people would make in ten or even a hundred lifetimes. We may have houses all over the world. We have all of that, and I know with heart-stopping certainty that I’d throw it away in an instant if it meant I would never lose Jesse or my girls.

I’ve found a kind of happiness people are only supposed to be able to dream of.

As I lay with my bare body against the Earth, staring up at the waning moon and the swathe of stars scattered across the sky, all I can do is smile, because I know I’m perfectly, truly happy, and so long as Jesse is at my side, I always will be.