Chapter Five
Why was she suddenly so nervous? The answer to that question was obvious, because ever since Megan realized Jax was in the supper club, she couldn’t settle, she felt antsy and could barely concentrate on anything Bonnie said or the band playing in front of her. What Megan didn’t know is that Jax felt much the same way. He couldn’t take his eyes off her once he recognized her. His brothers continued to chat about who knows what, but Jax barely heard them. And several people around him were swaying to the beat the band was putting down but they were all a blur.
What should he do? That’s the question that kept repeating in Jax’s mind that kept him distracted. Or should he do anything at all? Jax started thinking about the pros and cons of both scenarios. If he did approach her and she rejected him, that wouldn’t be good, in the short term. His feelings would be momentarily hurt, but that would also be a clear sign that him seeing her again was not fate, just happenstance. But what if he approached her and they hit it off? For the short-term, that would be good. However, what about the long-term? How would having a relationship impact his life? She was from Chandlerville or thereabouts. Would she be willing to relocate on his behalf?
Jax had to chuckle at himself, realizing just how far ahead of the situation he had gotten. Maybe it was those parallel thought processes that kept him from making a move? Maybe it was that way of thinking that kept him single? His brothers didn’t wait for Jax to decide what he was going to do because they were already making moves of their own. Tommy found a cute girl at the bar that he was chatting up, and some girl Pete had casually run into in the past found her way to their table and Pete and the girl were enamored in conversation. That left Jax to mull over his own thoughts, trapping and untrapping himself in possibilities.
Before he could second-guess or stop himself, Jax got up from his seat. He started to move in the direction where the intriguing young lady sat, but she had gotten up from her seat too and was moving towards the hallway, presumably where the restrooms were. Feeling awkward, Jax altered his destination, instead moving towards the end of the bar that bordered the hallway the young lady had just gone down. This was so out of character for Jax. This was something he never did. At the same time, Jax couldn’t stop himself. He had to at least find out who she was.
The butterflies in Megan’s stomach continued to soar as she made her way to the bathroom. She’d never had that kind of feeling before about any guy, and there had been other guys. Megan dated before. A couple of guys were nice, and they were interested in her, but they didn’t quite mesh, and Megan didn’t connect with them. They were cordial, but nothing ever came of it. Even with those guys; the guys she thought might be the one, never gave her butterflies like the ones flitting around in her stomach at the moment. She just needed to take a moment to check her makeup and to breathe. Bonnie had her eyes on some guy across the club, so she wasn’t willing to quit flirting with him to accompany Megan to the bathroom. That was okay. Bonnie could forgive her for breaking rule number one – never let your bestie go to the restroom by herself.
After a quick makeup check and a check of her hair, Megan left the ladies’ room to return to her table. Jax leaned against the bar. He didn’t want it to look obvious that he was waiting for her, so he ordered a drink. Still, he stood rather than sit, looking down the hall every other minute or two to see if she was coming. When he caught a glimpse of her in his periphery, Jax smoothed down his shirt and tried his best not to look like a stalker. Megan had her mind on returning to Bonnie until she saw him standing at the bar. Her feet slowed down, refusing to move forward. There was a leap in her chest just seeing him. Suddenly, she became self-conscious about her outfit and her hair and everything else associated with her.
Jax looked down the hallway, and saw her shuffling, trying to decide if she should move forward or backtrack. But his eyes found hers and eventually, she started moving forward. He was busted, but it was too late for Jax to back out. His gaze wouldn’t allow Megan to back out either. They were stuck in this moment no matter how unnerving it was. Jax stood and faced Megan as she ventured the last few feet down the hallway and into the club area. Megan thought to sidestep and go a different way, but she really didn’t want to. She wanted this encounter no matter how nervous she was.
“Hi, I’m Jax,” he said nervously, extending his hand in her direction.
“I’m Megan,” she replied. Megan’s hand shook slightly as she accepted his, but when he closed his hand over hers, the shaking stopped in her hand and moved to her legs. She could totally fangirl, shaking hands with the Jax Sutton, but Megan closed her eyes for a split second, gathered her bearings and tried to smile without looking weird. As they held hands, although it was initially designed to be a polite handshake, Jax’s eyes took Megan in and she did the same.
“You look familiar,” Jax began.
“I was at the parade,” Megan replied.
“Yes, you were,” Jax replied, realizing he was still holding Megan’s hand. Easing his away with a smile, Jax continued. “But I think it’s more than that,” Jax said. Megan smiled broadly as her eyes momentarily left the unwavering look from Jax as he tried to figure out where he could possibly know her from. Megan chuckled as Jax struggled to figure it out. She laughed because she could easily bail him out but hearing him guess and seeing his eyes light up every time he thought he knew where they met before was kind of cute.
“I’ve got it!” Jax exclaimed, excited that he finally figured it out.
“Really?” Megan teased, interested to see if he was right. “Okay, where?”
“Well, it’s really a process of elimination,” Jax said, smiling smugly. “We’re about the same age, I think, even though with those high cheekbones, it would be difficult to tell just how old you are. Anyway, if we are about the same age, and presumably you’re from here, it would have to be either church or school. And since I know everyone back at my family’s church, none of which are as beautiful as you are, I would have to guess, Megan, that I know you from school.”
Jax stood back proudly as if he solved the mystery.
“Oh, so it’s not that you remember me from school, it’s just that it’s the only place you could have known me from?” Megan taunted.
“That sounded better in my head,” Jax replied, hearing what he said aloud.
“I understand, Megan answered, “I’m not very memorable.”
“That is so not true,” Jax said moving a step closer to Megan. “I remember you from the parade. True, it was only a day, or so ago, but not only do I remember you, I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”
“Really,” Megan said blushingly.
“And I’m not just saying that to bail myself out of the other mess I made,” Jax offered.
“I remember you though,” Megan suggested.
Now, Jax was the one blushing, in a manly way.
“From the parade?”
“And high school,” Megan corrected.
“My occupation makes me easier to remember,” Jax said. “I’m sure if I saw you in a parade, or on a billboard, or television, I would remember you too.”
“True,” Megan agreed, “but that’s not the only reason I remember you,” Megan admitted.
“Oh really?”
Megan paused briefly. She expected to be tongue-tied and too nervous to even formulate a coherent sentence in Jax’s presence. But he was so easy to talk to. It was disarming. Megan really wanted to pinch herself to see if she was dreaming or really standing in Jairos talking one-on-one with Jax Sutton.
“Come on,” Jax cajoled. “Tell me why you remember me?”
“Oh no,” Megan giggled. “It’s too embarrassing. I can’t believe I even said as much as I have.”
“It’s too late to back out now,” Jax teased, reaching out and touching Megan gently on the waist. His touch sent shivers to her core.
“Uhn uhn,” Megan replied, covering her face with both hands.
“You are really not going to tell me?” Jax jested.
“Nope, I am certainly not,” Megan laughed.
“Okay,” Jax said, stroking his chin with his free hand. “What will it take for you to tell me? Dinner? Dancing? The Movies?”
“Hmm,” Megan mused, stroking her chin as Jax did, obviously teasing him.
“Are you trying to bribe me?”
“Maybe,” Jax admitted. He smiled again, and their eyes connected again. Megan had a tough time holding Jax’s gaze. It felt like his eyes pierced her very soul. Her knees were weak and the butterflies in her stomach were doing somersaults and cartwheels. Then, Megan felt eyes on her from somewhere else and when she looked around, she saw Bonnie looking at her with wide eyes and her mouth open. It was just the excuse Megan needed.
“I have been a bad friend,” Megan said, turning Jax’s attention toward her table. When Bonnie saw Jax looking in her direction, her mouth closed, replaced by a goofy grin, and she shrugged her shoulders. Now she was just as embarrassed as Megan had been. Laughing Jax moved closer to Megan, sliding his arm around her waist.
“You should take me to meet your friend, so I can apologize for holding you up.”
Megan giggled, and then sighed, feeling the strength of his arm holding her possessively. She liked it. As they moved across the club towards Bonnie, it was a good thing Jax was holding her as Megan felt weakened by his touch. By the time they arrived at the table, Bonnie’s mouth was open again. She looked from Megan to Jax and back to Megan in disbelief. When she saw how bright Megan’s smile was, Bonnie beamed. Jax, being the perfect gentleman, eased Megan from his grip and pulled her chair out waiting for her to sit before he took the seat next to her. Underneath the table, Bonnie was tapping Megan’s leg. There was an internal squee they both wanted to release, but they held it in check in Jax’s presence.
“Jax Sutton, this is my best friend, Bonnie. Bonnie, this is Jax Sutton.”
Just as he had done with Megan, Jax extended a polite hand in Bonnie’s direction. She giggled and then accepted his handshake.
“Pleasure to meet you Bonnie,” Jax said, his baritone voice playing nicely against the backdrop of the jazz band.
“The pleasure is mine,” Bonnie giggled. She was fangirling as hard as Megan had in the beginning, excited that her friend finally met her dream guy.
Bonnie looked at Megan again. She looked excited and nervous, but mostly excited. The conversation between the three flowed smoothly. They changed from wine to mixed drinks and before it was over, Pete joined them at the table and the foursome sat together long into the night listening to good music, drinking good libations and enjoying each other’s company. Megan smiled when she saw how well Pete and Bonnie were hitting it off.
Jax leaned over and whispered in Megan’s ear. “There’s still something you haven’t told me.”
Feeling his warm breath against her ear sent a wave of chills down her spine. Coyly she smiled. “What is that?”
“Why you remember me,” Jax crooned.
“What about the bribes, Megan quipped. “Are they off the table?”
“No, but that was really just my way of seeing what you like so I can ask you out,” Jax crooned again. It took everything in Megan to keep her body from quivering in his presence.
“Well Mr. Sutton, I like, long walks in the park, fast cars, and all the other things you mentioned,” Megan said, whispering in Jax's ear as well. He too felt a pleasant sensation having her that close to him. He inhaled deeply taking in her scent. He wanted to remember that.
“Is that a yes, that you’ll go out with me,” Jax asked.
Going out with Jax Sutton… really, Megan mused to herself.
“That’s a yes.”
Chapter Six
“Can you believe it, Megan?” Bonnie beamed.
“Barely,” Megan replied as the two ladies drove from the supper club. Megan couldn’t stop smiling. There are such rare occasions when the fantasy becomes reality; when the dream moves from only showing up during sleep to being there when you are awake. And that’s what was happening for Megan. It was hard to believe and while she sat in the passenger seat, she pinched herself just to make sure she hadn’t slipped into a dream-state unknowingly and was truly awake. When she pinched herself, she felt it which meant that what happened just a few hours before was real.
And Megan floated for the next week; her feet barely touching the ground. She tried not to fixate on her upcoming date, but it was hard. Jax Sutton was, well, everything she ever dreamed about. As hard as it was, it was finally date night and Megan was in a full-fledged panic. She had taken the time to get her hair and nails done. Megan even splurged for a pedicure. But she stood in front of her closet and looked at all her clothes and nothing seemed to be the right outfit for a first real date with Jax. More than that, Jax was kind of evasive as to exactly what they would be doing or where they would be going on the date.
“So, how am I supposed to know what to wear?” Megan mused aloud as she shifted her weight from one foot to the other.
Megan looked over the multitude of teacher appropriate attire; the unflattering slacks, the high collar blouses, the floral dresses and the tunic style sweaters that littered her closet.
“Ugh,” Megan moaned despairingly. Looking down at her wristwatch and seeing the time, Megan realized if Jax was timely, she was already going to make him wait. Megan swiped through the clothes one more time and nothing appealed to her. With another groan, Megan closed her eyes and reached onto the rack. Whatever she pulled out is what she was going to wear. Once she had the hanger in her hand, Megan opened one eye then the other, hoping her blind selection didn’t totally bomb. When it didn’t, Megan smiled and made a dash for the bedroom to slip on the dress she selected. Fortunately, the colors were soft that complimented her pale skin. There was a ruffled V-neck and the dress wrapped neatly at the waist stopping just short of her knees.
When the doorbell rang, Megan was just finishing tying the wrap on her dress.
“Just a minute,” she said, taking a final look in the mirror on her side table and padded toward the door. This was it!
Okay, Megan, keep it together, keep it together, she coached herself as she put on her taupe open-toed slingbacks. The shoes were high enough to be sexy and comfortable enough to walk in. smoothing down her dress as she turned towards the door, Megan took in one last deep breath and released it slowly as she turned the knob.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
It was Jax Sutton. Yeah, saying his full name might seem ridiculous at this point but that’s how Megan saw him. He was Jax Sutton, standing at her door in all his divine glory, wearing a dark pair of jeans that fit him to perfection, a white button-down shirt opened at the collar and cuffed at the wrists. The dark brown suit jacket he wore draped his frame and added a touch of sophistication to his otherwise casual outfit. But once Megan got past how nice Jax looked, she was almost floored when he smiled; not a wide toothy smile but an easy smile that lit up his eyes. Megan smiled, too; not a schoolgirl crush kind of smile, but a womanly smile that subtly showed Jax that she wasn’t the girl he almost remembered from high school.
Jax held the door for Megan as they left her apartment building. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw the car. It was undeniably Jax’s.
“This could not be the same one,” Megan said, taking a gander at the 1957 sky blue Chevy Bel Air Classic with the drop top.
“Yep, same one,” Jax beamed.
“Wow,” Megan beamed as well. This was one of the cars Jax tooled around in when they were back in school. It didn’t look as good back then as it did now, but Megan recognized it immediately. She stroked the outline of the hood. Jax watched, appreciating how she appreciated his vehicle. They already had a few things in common. Jax had a good time with Megan the other night at the supper club and found that he couldn’t stop thinking about her. Now, she remembered one of his favorite cars and really liked it. The smile that rested on Jax’s lips simmered as his eyes tightened as he looked at Megan from behind. Her blonde tresses dropping just below her shoulders with curls teasing the center of her back, small waist and long firm legs enticed Jax. He was hopeful. Jax was looking for forever. Maybe Megan was it.
Jax waited until Megan turned around to face him. Her smile was wide and bright, but when she saw Jax hooded eyes, Megan’s eyes softened, and her smile softened as well. Taking a step toward her, Jax got close enough that the sensual scent she wore wafted into his nostrils, momentarily intoxicating him. He leaned past her and opened the passenger side door and waited until Megan slid in before closing the door behind her. Jax walked around the back of the vehicle and climbed in on the driver’s side. After closing his door and starting the ignition, Jax got ready to put the Chevy in drive when Megan reached out and touched him on the arm. He could hardly concentrate on her question for sensing the warmth from her touch. It was like a much-desired caress; he hadn’t stopped to realize he missed.
“Are you finally going to tell me where we’re going,” Megan asked. “I couldn’t decide what to wear because I have no clue where we’re going,” she fussed.
Easing his arm onto the back of the couch style seat, Jax lifted his hand towards Megan’s face and as their eyes connected, he tucked one of her locks behind her ear. Megan’s heart nearly melted in her chest. That was one of the sweetest touches she had ever felt.
“Do you trust me,” Jax asked.
Megan’s eyes closed slowly and opened again. Her body was still reeling from what some would consider an innocent gesture. But for Megan, the gentle touch she received from Jax was something she’d never felt before. His touch to her skin was like sending a gently vibrating electric current to her core. If tucking her hair did that to Megan, what would a hug, a kiss, a… Megan stopped herself from going further. Jax was waiting for an answer and she was fantasizing about him.
“Do I know you well enough to trust you,” Megan teased sweetly.
“No, but it doesn’t always take a lifetime to build trust, does it Megan?”
Jax question was raised with a smile on his lips, but looking into the depths of his blue eyes, Megan could see the sincerity.
“No, it doesn’t,” Megan replied. “Which means you’re not going to tell me, which is fine because I trust you.”
“Say it again,” Jax said, his face shifting to intense with his eyes still remaining mesmerizing. There was a slight pause as they locked each other in a heated gaze.
“I trust you,” Megan repeated.
“Great,” Jax crooned. “Now, let me help you with your seatbelt.”
Sliding closer to Megan, Jax reached over and grabbed the seatbelt. In a vehicle the age of his Chevy, the seatbelt was a waist belt; no shoulder strap. Megan’s face flushed warm as their bodies were closer than they’d been before. She inhaled deeply, and the scent of his masculine scent filled her nostrils. Even after Megan heard the click of the seatbelt, Jax lingered. They were face to face; so close Megan could feel his exhale against her skin. They stayed there in the moment; Jax’s eyes moving from Megan’s eyes to her lips and back again. To say that she wanted to kiss him; to feel his lips against hers, was an understatement. But Megan was not the kind of girl to make the first move. Instead, she stayed in that place with Jax, not desiring more than what was there, just enjoying feeling him, sensing him, being close to him.
When Jax eased away, Megan exhaled. She hadn’t even realized she was holding her breath. Turning toward the passenger side and away from Jax, Megan rolled her eyes and smiled wide. This was already a night she wouldn’t soon, well, ever, forget.
Jax put the car in drive and within minutes, a gentle breeze blew through Megan’s hair. Riding in the drop top Chevy was incredible. The car was heavy and hung to the road. Jax turned on the radio and music flowed through the old-style speakers with the same kind of sound one would get from playing a vinyl record. It was nostalgic. Megan leaned on the door and let her hair flow back as the speed of the Chevy increased. It no longer mattered where they were going. Megan was along for the ride.
When they turned onto a dirt road, Megan lifted up from the door and looked around. There was no destination there; no restaurant or anything Megan could see. She looked at Jax who was smiling widely.
“I know what you’re thinking,” Jax said as he slowed the car to a stop.
“Are you sure,” Megan asked looking around. She tried not to look nervous, even scared. They were alone, on a deserted road, with no lights other than the illumination from the Chevy and the light the bright night moon provided.
“I thought it would be fun to let you feel what it’s like,” Jax replied.
“Feel what it’s like?” Megan asked; her eyes still darting around.
“Yes, Megan, feel what it’s like to throw caution to the wind,” Jax replied matter of factly.
His smile was disarming. She started to relax a little.
“And how do you propose we do that?”
“Speed.”
“Speed?”
“Yes, Megan, speed,” Jax replied. “You strike me as the kind of woman who obeys the rules, drives the speed limit, pauses at the yellow light, and always looks both ways before crossing. Am I right?”
She couldn’t help but laugh. Jax had her pegged to a tea.
“For your information, Mr. Sutton, I am very proud of my perfect driving record,” Megan scoffed. Jax laughed a hearty laugh. He was able to be unencumbered around Megan, which was nice.
“Well, Ms. Richland, there’s no cops around here, so if you did break the law, just a little, I won’t tell.” Now Megan was the one laughing and then she stopped, and her mouth opened just as her eyes widened.
“You want me to drive? Me?”
“Yep,” Jax quipped. “I get to drive fast all the time. I want you to see what it’s all about.”
Megan went from surprised to interested.
“Really? You’ll let me drive your car, this car?”
Jax nodded.
“Then, that means you trust me,” Megan answered. “Why? You barely know me.”
Jax paused briefly before responding.
“I don’t know,” he replied honestly. “I just do.”
Megan looked at Jax intensely in the shadowy light. She felt the same way. There was no real explanation other than she just did.
“Then move over, Mr. Sutton.”
Megan reached down and released herself from the seatbelt. She fully expected Jax to exit the vehicle from the driver’s side and re-enter on the passenger side. That is not what he did. Once he released himself from the seatbelt, Jax slid in Megan’s direction. She thought about exiting the car from the passenger side but before she could move in that direction, Megan felt firm hands around her waist, moving her in his direction. They were hip to hip and then she was gently lifted onto his lap.
She squeed, literally. His move was so unexpected, but Megan couldn’t say it wasn’t welcomed. In her mind, Jax had always been so untouchable, but here she was sitting in her fantasy man’s lap. And then he turned her to face him fully. Megan was still giggling until Jax leaned in and quieted her laughter with a gentle kiss on the lips. It wasn’t a hungry, desperate kiss, but that didn’t mean it wasn’t intense. Megan kissed him back and then Jax parted her lips with his tongue; lightly probing her and tasting her mouth; the mouth he thought about since the supper club. The kiss for Megan was decades in the making and she didn’t want it to end.
And the kiss lasted for a while, and Megan enjoyed every moment of it. There was no need to pinch herself. This was real. She was with Jax Sutton, kissing him with her arms laced around his neck and kissing the lips she’d seen on posters and on television and it was real. When their lips finally parted, the two stayed right there; not immediately moving away from each other because being that close was nice. Megan had a need, a desire that hadn’t been filled in longer than she cared to remember. She didn’t know that Jax had the same need. But he did.
“Ready,” Jax asked, bringing the conversation back.
“Mmhmm,” Megan uttered. “But first…”
Megan released the hold she had on Jax’s neck and took both hands, gently cupping his face on both sides. She planted a soft kiss on his lips and looked up into his eyes one more time before easing off his lap.
“Now, I’m ready.”
The car was still running, and Megan got in position to drive. When she pressed her foot on the accelerator, the Chevy purred for her. Jax wasn’t far away. He saw how excited she looked behind the wheel. Megan dropped the car into gear and it started to move. Before long, dust was flying up behind the Chevy as Megan pushed the car to a nice clip. Her hair blew back, and she felt the power of the car under her control.
“Woohoo!” Jax exclaimed as Megan leaned forward enjoying the drive. As she neared the end of the strip, Megan slowed the car down and then stopped it, turning to Jax with a wide smile and bright eyes.
“That was so friggin awesome,” Megan exclaimed.
“Nice,” Jax replied.
Just then, “Born to be Wild” came on the radio. Megan leaned over and turned up the volume. By the middle of the first chorus Jax and Megan were singing at the top of their lungs, Jax jumped out of the car and scurried around to the driver side. Megan welcomed him in and scooted over so Jax could get behind the wheel. He turned the car around and Megan got on her knees on the seat, singing even louder as the song played on her arms were up, her hair was blowing, and Jax was moving the car down the dirt road. Megan felt so carefree. As the song came to an end, Jax stopped the car and put it in park, turning off the ignition but leaving it in such a way that the radio continued to play.
Jax climbed out and walked around to the passenger side, opening Megan’s door and assisting her out. They both leaned against the car and enjoyed the peace and quietness of the area. The moon seemed to shine even brighter and Megan paid attention to the stars that twinkled. Neither of them felt the need to fill the empty space with conversation. They just enjoyed being with each other. When the classic love song, “I want to Know What Love is,” poured through the speakers, Jax asked Megan, “Would you like to dance?”
She did, and he enveloped her in his strong arms, pulling her close, evaporating any space that previously existed between them. Megan rested her head on Jax’s strong chest. She felt the beat of his heart. They danced through that song and a few others, moving from slow dancing to a funky jig and back to slow dancing again.
By the time Jax bought Megan home, it was in the wee hours of the morning. Like a perfect gentleman, Jax walked Megan to her door.
“I had a great time,” Megan said as the two stood face to face on her porch.
“Me too,” Jax replied.
Jax reached out and lifted Megan’s chin. His eyes took her in. Megan looked up into his and could see how easy it would be to lose herself in him. She was fine with that. Jax kissed her fully on the lips and then walked away. Megan’s eyes followed him. She was practically floating on a cloud higher than nine. Jax leaned on his car as he watched Megan enter her home safely. Megan heard the Chevy pull away from the curb. Leaning her back against her front door, Megan smiled. Tonight, with Jax was better than she ever dreamed.
Chapter Seven
“I want to hear every sordid detail,” Bonnie exclaimed before the sun was fully up in the sky.
“Sordid,” Megan murmured, still tucked in her bed covers.
“Yes, sordid,” Bonnie beamed.
Megan sat up.
“Bonnie, it was everything!”
“Oh my God, Megan,” Bonnie sang. “Spill it, girlie!”
Megan relived every moment for Bonnie.
“That was a good date,” Bonnie agreed. “So, what’s next?”
Bonnie’s question caught Megan off guard. She didn’t have an answer for that. She had no idea and said so. Megan had been so excited about being with Jax, she didn’t think past the moment. Megan didn’t consider that Jax didn’t live in Chandlerville anymore; that at some point, he would have to return to his high-profile life and she would return to her hum-drum life in Chandler. She hadn’t thought about what the date meant, if it meant anything at all. Suddenly, all of Megan’s warm feelings and happy thoughts shifted to uneasiness about the possibilities.
Maybe it was just a date and nothing more?
Megan ended the call with Bonnie, but she couldn’t go back to sleep. Her mind was filled with questions she didn’t have the answers to. Megan didn’t want to be presumptuous, assuming that their date meant more than it actually did. But what she felt couldn’t be denied, or could it? Maybe it was what Jax did; give a girl a good time and move on, back to what he knew. He would leave a good taste in the girl’s mouth because it was fun, and intense, and he made her feel special. But, what if that was it and there was no more?
Megan tried to be the bigger person. It was nice. If there was nothing more she’d have to be okay with it. At least she had a chance to live out her dream. It would have to be enough. Jax Sutton was famous. There were girls throwing themselves at his feet. What made Megan think her time with him was more than that? When Megan eased back under the cover, it wasn’t with the same enthusiasm than she got up with.
“I’m going to need you on the first flight out,” Arlene said. Jax could hear shuffling in the background. Arlene was always multitasking.
“I thought I had few more days before the thing,” Jax replied unenthusiastically.
“Yeah, but the sponsors want to meet with you immediately to go over the new contracts before the race, which means I need you on a plane by the end of the day,” Arlene insisted. “Are you fighting me on this? Remember, you didn’t even want to go back to Chandlerville. What changed?”
“I’ll be on the plane,” Jax acquiesced and ended the call.
What changed?
Jax didn’t have to think about that. He wasn’t willing to share it with his manager, but what changed for Jax was undeniable. He didn’t want to deny it. Megan was unexpected. Now though, Jax couldn’t imagine returning to his life and just walking away from her. There was something special there and he didn’t want to let it go.
He had the same thoughts in his head that Megan had. He had a whole life to return to that didn’t involve her; hundreds of miles away from the girl who could be the love of his life. But what if the fantasy was over for Megan? What if he wasn’t the man of her real dreams; not the distant ones where the person is unattainable, but the real ones that determine a person’s trajectory, who they love and how they love? Maybe, after spending time with him, Megan realized that she had just been smitten and that was it. Maybe nothing changed for her…
The rest of the day went by fast. Jax contemplated how he would handle letting Megan know he was leaving. Why was it such a big deal? Leaving didn’t mean never returning; however, Jax had to be honest with himself. His life was hectic. There was always demands for his time and attention. Soon he would fall back into the pattern of working too hard and not having time for anything else, let alone anyone else. But Jax couldn’t just leave and not say anything. That didn’t sit well with him.
Megan considered calling Jax to feel him out; to see if their adventure was just that, a one-time adventure. But Megan wasn’t ready for the answer to that question especially if it was one time. It would be easier to just appreciate the experience and move on since she resigned herself to the real possibility that it couldn’t be more than what it was. So, when her phone rang, and Megan recognized the number, her stomach dropped nearly to the floor. Suddenly, Megan’s heart was racing, and adrenaline was coursing through her veins and she considered not answering it. Speculating was sometimes easier than confirming. What if he didn’t have anything good to say? What if it was just one date and not the forever connection she longed for?
“Hi,” Megan answered tentatively.
“Hi,” Jax replied. Just hearing her voice made him smile.
There was silence between them and this time it felt like it needed to be filled. This silence was awkward and neither of them liked it.
“My manager called. I have to leave.”
“Okay.” Megan’s heart didn’t break. She kind of expected that leaving would happen. It’s what he wasn’t saying that Megan held her breath for.
“I don’t want to.”
“What?”
“I don’t want to,” Jax replied. “I’m not ready to leave… you…”
The sigh that escaped Megan’s lips was matched with a quick inhale. This was the unexpected.
“Why,” Megan was brave enough to ask.
“You’re gonna make me say it,” Jax grinned.
“Say what,” Megan baited.
“That there is something there. That I can’t stop thinking about you and I hope you can’t stop thinking about me either. That I don’t want to leave you, Megan.”
She collapsed back on the couch and kicked up her feet like she did when she watched race car driver, Jax Sutton win the semi-finals. He liked her, he really liked her.
“It’s not forever, right? I mean, you’ll be back,” Megan suggested.
“But when though,” Jax replied. “I don’t live here, but you do.”
“Something we really didn’t consider,” Megan agreed.
“I don’t know when I would be able to come back home but it wouldn’t be any time soon,” Jax said.
There was that silence again.
“So even though we both have feelings for each other, distance is coming between us.”
“You have feelings for me Ms. Richland,” Jax teasingly inquired.
“That’s not the point,” Megan sighed. She sat up on the couch and thought about the reality of their situation.
“And it would be unfair for me to ask you to give up what you have in Chandlerville for a guy you barely know.”
“You’re wrong about that,” Megan corrected. “I have known you my whole life. You’re not a stranger Jax. I have loved you from a distance for as long as I can remember, so you’re no stranger.”
“You love me?”
Megan was embarrassed by her disclosure and started to fumble and stutter. But the reality was, she did have feelings for him way before they actually got together, and it was more than just a crush. Moving from loving from a distance to loving up close and in person was not a big leap for Megan and she realized it with Jax on the phone. He did, too.
“Yeah, I do,” Megan replied. “but it doesn’t matter,” she continued. “You have a whole life, a separate life that has nothing to do with me. And I understand that. So, it was nice, actually spending time with you, having the chance to get to know you for real; more than just the guy from high school.” All the thoughts Megan had apart from him she shared with Jax. He didn’t like the sound of it, but he understood where she was coming from.
“So, what do we do?” Jax asked.
“We go on with our lives. People have expectations of you. You’ve got a big race coming up,” Megan replied trying to sound enthusiastic.
“Yeah, I do,” Jax agreed, but his tone as not nearly as upbeat as Megan’s.
“So, when are you leaving?”
“Headed to the airport now, actually,” Jax replied.
“Well, travel safely and thanks for an incredible time,” Megan answered somberly.
“Yeah, it was incredible.”
“I’ll call you when I land, okay?”
“Okay, you do that.”
The line disconnected. Their conversation was over. And for Megan, she wasn’t delusional. She didn’t hold out hope that he would call let alone be her happily ever after.