It was one of the saddest yet happiest days of my life. In a few short hours, I would be flying to meet the man I had been promised to, multibillionaire Jack Kemble. He was practically a movie star—a man of every woman's dreams, with a chiseled physique and a smile that could stop you dead in your tracks.
It wasn't all happy times, though. As I sat in my room, my gaze darted to all the memories on my bedroom walls, avoiding the eyes of the man in front of me. Liam and I had been best friends since kindergarten, and as the years turned us from innocent children into adults, it had been clear that he wanted something more. Still, my arranged marriage had kept any feelings that I had for him at bay, and he had suffered through it, just content to be by my side.
Now I would have to say goodbye to him forever, and I could almost feel his heart breaking as he stared at me longingly.
“Please reconsider, Melita. You know you don't want this.” His voice was strained, and I could hear the crisp pain in his words.
“You know that I have to do this for my family.” I let my eyes fall to my hands, and then they instinctively crossed my lap to his. His thick fingers twitched, and I couldn't help but remember all the times those same unsteady hands had held me in my moments of darkness. How would I ever survive without those strong hands to comfort me?
The tears began to flow, despite my resolve not to cry. Crying would only weaken both of us, and I didn't want to hurt him any more than I already had.
“What if you don't love this man?” he asked.
“People don't always marry for love,” I reminded him, trying to recall the lessons my mother had taught me.
Coming from a wealthy family wasn't all that it was cracked up to be. Often times, marriages were arranged so that two families could join assets, making them both even wealthier. My parents were deeply enriched in the oil business, while Jack's family was into everything else. If our marriage went through as planned, my family would give Jack a large sum of money to expand his business to overseas markets, and my father would become CFO of Jack's corporation. It was a win/win situation for all involved.
If not for Liam, it would have been a win for me as well. What girl didn't want to marry a handsome billionaire? But the ties that bound me to Liam were strong, and there were definite secret feelings there. Leaving him would break my heart.
“It's time to go,” my mother said through the bedroom door.
“I'll miss you,” I told Liam, taking his hand into mine.
“If he doesn't treat you well, you come back to me. Do you understand?” His voice commanded my attention, and I allowed myself to gaze into his silvery-blue eyes a final time. So beautiful and soothing. I would miss them, too, the way they seemed to look at me with all of the gentleness and affection in the world.
We embraced, and I worried he might never let me go. To be honest, I wasn't sure if I wanted him to let me go. But then my mother was at the door, opening it and giving us both her best impatient glare.
Liam walked me out to the limo, and I watched him through the back window as we drove out of sight and I left the life that I loved behind.
The flight to New York was grueling, despite first-class accommodations. I spent most of it nauseous, though I couldn't tell if it was from altitude sickness or nervousness. I tried to distract myself by imagining what Jack would be like, but I think that only made things worse.
He would be waiting to greet me at the airport, and hopefully, he'd be considerate enough to leave the paparazzi at home. They tended to follow him around like dogs, looking for any juicy tidbit that they could present to their papers or news stations. From what I could tell, Jack didn't have a personal life. Every woman he went out with, every good or bad thing he did, was quickly aired across the nation like dirty laundry. It was sickening to know that my life would soon be like that simply because of my association with him.
When I stepped into the NYC airport terminal, I didn't have to scan the crowd long to realize that Jack wasn't waiting for me there. In his place stood a large, intimidating-looking man in a suit holding up a cardboard sign with my name printed on it. Maybe it was for the best that Jack wasn't there in person, I thought with a sigh, a bit relieved that the butterflies in my stomach could have a rest. At least this way, I didn't have to worry about the paparazzi.
The man greeted me and escorted me through the airport. He seemed nice enough. Obviously, one of Jack's bodyguards.
After picking up my luggage, he led me outside to a waiting limo. Courteously, he opened the door, and I stepped inside, nearly tripping on myself as my eyes landed on Jack Kemble sitting coolly with his legs crossed.
He leaned forward and extended a hand to guide me into my seat. “Miss Rickard.”
“Mister Kemble. It's a pleasure to finally meet you.” I put on my best smile, trying not to blush.
It felt like sitting across from a celebrity. Jack Kemble was wearing distressed jeans and a stylish t-shirt with a black dress coat. His dark disheveled hair was accented perfectly by a large pair of sunglasses, which were completely unnecessary for the dimly lit limo. After a moment of being intrigued by him, I began to realize that the whole get-up was a bit silly, as if he had gone out of his way to try to impress me. Perhaps he was just as nervous as I was.
“The pleasure is all mine.” He bent forward to kiss my hand before releasing it back to me. “I apologize for not meeting you inside. I figured you would probably be exhausted coming off of your flight and wouldn't want to be bothered with the media.”
“How considerate of you.” I nodded in thanks.
“We're going to my parents' house for dinner right now. They're greatly looking forward to meeting you as well.”
“It sounds lovely.”
“Would you like some champagne?” Jack leaned towards the built in wine glass holder to take out a glass before I had even responded.
“No, thank you. My stomach is still a bit unsettled from the flight.”
He straightened himself, looking ever collected. My nerves were on fire, and I only hoped I seemed half as calm as him.
“So, tell me a bit about yourself. I'm to marry you in six months, and I don't even know anything about you,” he said.
“Well,” I searched for things to say. In all honesty, there wasn't much to tell. “I just graduated from UTSA with an Associates in Mathematics. After we're married, I plan on going back to school to get my bachelors and then my masters and PhD.”
“Very admirable. What do you hope to do with your degree?”
“I'd like to be a calculus professor at Yale or Harvard.”
“Impressive ambition. I like a woman with ambition. And hobbies? What do you like to do for fun?”
“Painting and playing the harp.”
“I would love to hear you play some time, and see some of your artwork.” He sounded genuine, but I was almost certain it was only out of respect for our upcoming marriage. “Is there anything you would like to ask me?”
I couldn't think of anything. To be honest, I had researched him thoroughly before my flight, spent every moment of the last few days that I hadn't been packing or spending time with Liam to learn everything I could about the man whom I'd soon call husband.
Fresh out of high school, Jack Kemble had become immersed in business, forgoing college for a hands-on education. His father schooled him in all matters related to running a multibillion-dollar corporation, and whenever Jack had gotten up to speed, his father had handed over the reigns, going into early retirement. He still coached Jack on the more difficult aspects of business, but for the most part, Jack was on his own, handling things with the grace and professionalism that were rare in someone his age.
“Your hobbies are fly fishing, hunting, and golf. You have a dog named Brownie and a horse named Winnie. When you were eighteen, you began learning your father's business and had taken over shortly after turning twenty-four. Your birthday is March sixth, and your favorite food is peanut butter sandwiches with bananas,” I rattled off all that I could remember.
A wide grin spread across Jack's face. “Very impressive. I see you did your homework.”
“I did,” I giggled.
“Now I feel like I came completely unprepared.”
“I'm afraid you won't find out much about me on Google.”
“Then I get a free pass for not knowing your favorite food.”
I enjoyed his lighthearted humor, and he was surprisingly easy to talk to. Maybe things would be alright after all.
At dinner, Jack's family was more than courteous. They seemed genuinely interested in my life back in Texas, and of course, they asked plenty of questions about my father's oil business. I did my best to answer as accurately as possible, never one for giving out misleading information.
When dinner was over, I was shown to my room. It was generously large. Even bigger than my bedroom at home. Before I unpacked, I took a few minutes to lie on my bed, looking up at the cream-colored ceiling and going over the night's events in my head. All was going well so far. Jack was incredibly polite and very handsome. It seemed like he would make a good husband.
While I tried to imagine how our life would be together, my mind kept drifting back to Liam. He had looked so upset when I left. It was strange to be without him—without anyone that I knew from back home. Here in New York, I was completely alone. Jack and his family were all that I had now. It would be a hard thing to adjust to.
Tomorrow, Jack would return to his mansion, but I would be left at his parents' house. His parents were old-fashioned Christian Catholic and felt it was inappropriate for me to live with him before the wedding. I wasn't sure if I was happy about that or sad. From what the media had told of Jack, he had a ferocious sexual appetite. While I was sitting at home, denying Liam's advances and remaining celibate, Jack had been out living it up, dating supermodels and famous actresses.
Maybe it was better for me to stay with his parents. I was still a virgin and not sure if I was ready to be pressured into sex. Jack's parents had the right idea. I only ever wanted to sleep with one man in my entire life, and that would be my husband.
Yet at the same time, I couldn't help but feel that being parted from Jack left him open to invite other girls to his mansion without me knowing. While he seemed like a good guy, I didn't trust him on that front. He lived fast and carefree. Old habits wouldn't die easily, I was certain.
The night was restless, and after trying and failing to go to sleep for over two hours, I decided to get up and step outside. A breath of fresh air would probably do me some good.
As quiet as a mouse, I wrapped a robe around myself and tiptoed through the mansion to the top story living room which opened onto a balcony that overlooked the estate. The night breeze was fresh and crisp against my skin, cleansing me of my worries as I looked out across the fields and hills behind the Kemble estate.
“Couldn't sleep?” a voice stirred me, and I swirled around to see Jack walking towards me in nothing but a pair of sweat pants. The way they hung from his hips brought deliciously naughty thoughts to mind, and I felt ashamed of myself for even having them.
“No,” I replied, pulling the robe a bit tighter around me. “Between the flight and meeting you and meeting your parents. . . it's all just been a bit overwhelming for me.”
“That's understandable,” he said as he stepped up beside me, peering out into the darkness as if he was taking in the landscape for the first time.
“It's very beautiful out here.” I turned my gaze into the distance.
“Not as beautiful as you.” The smile in his voice was apparent.
It sounded like a cheesy line, but my cheeks still grew warm from the thought that he found me attractive. I sighed contently, unable to think of anything to say in reply.
“Are you looking forward to the wedding?” Jack asked.
“I suppose. It's still a ways off.”
“Yes, but it's best to prepare now. We're going to be married for a very long time.”
It was such a funny thing for him to say.
“The rest of our lives,” I added.
“Yes.” He sucked in a breath. “I need to be upfront with you. Being my wife isn't going to be easy.”
“I didn't think it would be.” I glanced at his suddenly serious expression.
“I wish that you would have come sooner. I have certain needs . . . as a man.”
Oh no, I thought, my mind racing with panic. Here's where he asks me if I want to have sex. What will I say? If I deny him, things will be awkward between us, but I can't just agree. What about what I want—my needs?
“There are certain things that I like to do in the bedroom, and I need to know that you'll be able to handle them before we wed,” Jack continued.
“I'm a virgin.” The words came out of my mouth before I could even think to stop them. It was the only thing I knew to say to hopefully bring this unpleasant conversation to an abrupt halt.
“Oh, really?” He rubbed the back of his neck, shooting me a glance of what I could only describe as discomfort. Now things were really awkward.
“Yes.” I tried to remain strong, preparing my rebuttal for his advances.
Jack took a deep breath before speaking again. “There's a school in California that I'd like you to go to before we're married. They can teach you how to be the kind of lover that I need.”
“Why can't you teach me?” My voice was small, almost frightened sounding. I couldn't believe that we had just met, and he already wanted to talk about sex.
“I'm not that great as a teacher. And if you're a virgin, then you're definitely going to need lessons.”
I considered this for a moment. The prospect sounded fun and exciting, yet at the same time, I was offended that he wanted to send me away so quickly after arriving. “We only have six months to plan the wedding. I don't think it's a good idea for me to leave so soon.”
“The school is only for a week. I knew that we didn't have a lot of time, so I signed you up for the condensed version.”
“You already signed me up!” I gasped, looking at him incredulously. How dare he sign me up for some creepy sex school without asking me first? If this was how our marriage was going to be, then maybe it wouldn't work out after all.
“I thought you'd be a bit more . . .” Jack hesitated, looking for the right words to say not to piss me off. It was a bit too late for that, though. If Liam were here, he'd give Jack a good lesson in how to treat a lady. Was this really what I'd been saving myself for?
“A bit more what? Slutty?”
“That's not what I meant. Calm down, will you?” His expression was pained. “It's not what you think. This school is one-hundred percent professional. You'll learn things about yourself that will completely change your life. And when you come back, I promise I'll be the husband you deserve.”
“And what if I don't want to go to this school?” I folded my arms over my chest, refusing to look at him.
“Then we'll still get married, but I doubt it will be a happy marriage.”
I sighed, gazing out into the darkness. I had honestly expected him to say that we wouldn't marry if I refused. Maybe I had even hoped for it. Everything was happening so fast. It seemed like one surreal event after another. I just wanted life to slow down and be normal.
“What kind of school is this anyway?” I asked finally, huffing to show my disapproval.
I could hear the reluctance in his voice. “Have you ever heard of BDSM?”
It sounded familiar, but I couldn't recall what the acronym stood for exactly. “Isn't that something to do with fetishes?”
“Something like that. It stands for Bondage, Domination, Sadism, and Masochism.”
“Sounds like slavery to me,” I cut in sharply.
“It's about willingly giving yourself to someone else for their pleasure,” he explained calmly. “The school I'd like to send you to will teach you how to be a good submissive so that you can fill all of my sexual needs.”
“Can't I do that without being a slave?” My words were bitter.
“I know this is a lot to digest right now, but I'd really like you to consider it. You're a beautiful woman, and I think we'll make a great couple. But a big part of marriage is compromise and being willing to fill each other's needs. If you can't do this for me, then we've already started off on the wrong track.”
I didn't know what else to say. There were so many emotions raging through me. Anger. Distrust. What he was asking of me seemed ridiculous.
My breath hitched as I felt his hand slide on top of mine, drawing it to his lips for a gentle kiss. His soft blue eyes spoke of purer intentions that betrayed his sinful request. It was strange to see him so calm and collected after such a heated conversation.
“Good night, honey bee,” Jack whispered as he walked away.
Honey bee? I thought about the pet nickname for a moment. After not being able to figure it out, I let my mind drift to more pressing matters, analyzing our conversation.
Jack made it sound like this school was really important to our marriage, and I definitely did want the marriage to work. But BDSM? The thought that he wanted me to be a slave to him was absolutely repulsive.
I decided to return to my room and try to get some sleep. In the morning, my mind would be clearer, much better for considering his indecent proposal. But as before, my brain was too occupied for sleep, and I lie restless. Within minutes, I was sitting in front of the computer, researching away.
For someone who claimed to know the acronym for BDSM, Jack had gotten it wrong. It was actually a condensed acronym for bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, and sadomasochism or sadism and masochism. I wouldn't fault him for being off the mark a bit, but I liked to stay as accurate as possible. The practice itself seemed to encompass a wide array of kink, from wax play to whipping. None of it sounded appealing to me at all.
After I had gotten a better idea of what BDSM was, I Googled for related schools in California. There appeared to be one in San Francisco, but it only offered weekend courses at a hefty price.
I scowled all the way back to bed. This wasn't what I had signed up for. Of course not. Jack had signed me up for it. But my thoughts spoke of something deeper. Being betrothed. Leaving my home. It wasn't what I had really wanted. I wished I would have had enough sense to see it before I got on the plane. My happily ever after should have been with sweet stable Liam, not with fetishist multibillionaire Jack Kemble, who didn't even know me—who didn't care to get to know me before signing me up for this stupid school.
A knock on my bedroom door startled me awake the next morning. I must have stayed up so late that I slept past breakfast. Groggily, I leaned over to look at the alarm clock. Ten in the morning. Definitely late for breakfast. Why hadn't they woken me up sooner?
“Melita, are you alright in there?” Jack's mother asked through the door.
“Yes, ma'am. I'm fine. I'll be out in a minute.”
“Alright.” I could hear her footsteps walking away.
Had Jack already left for the day, I wondered as I quickly got dressed. Deep inside, I hoped that he had. I didn't feel like I could face him yet, especially when I was still undecided about the school.
Thankfully, Jack wasn't downstairs when I emerged from my bedroom. His mother told me that he had gone out for a while and would be back for lunch. It was very vague, but I didn't bother asking questions.
With a few hours of sleep under my belt, my mind was definitely clearer and better able to handle processing our conversation from last night. While I really didn't want to go to the school, the fact that it was only for a week made it a lot less daunting. One week of misery for a lifetime of happiness, that seemed to be the bargain Jack had struck, though I was curious about why he thought we would be unhappy if I didn't want to learn firsthand about BDSM. Surely, he wasn't kinky all the time.
Jack returned promptly at 11:30 with a giant bouquet of white roses. The ear to ear grin on his face made it seem like our previous conversation had never taken place, and for a moment, I felt normal again.
“For my honey bee,” he said as he placed the flowers in my arms.
“You shouldn't have.” I smiled back at him before giving the roses a good whiff. They smelled intoxicatingly wonderful.
“I thought I might show you my home after we have lunch,” he suggested.
“That sounds lovely,” I replied, handing the flowers over to one of their maids so that she could put them in water and place them in my room.
At lunch, things seemed more relaxed. Jack's mother went over all of the social clubs they belonged to with me, clubs that I could only assume I would be expected to join once Jack and I were married, and quite possibly before. Meanwhile, Jack and his father talked business. To be honest, I was more interested in their conversation. Business was a much more fascinating topic than who to talk to and who to avoid.
After lunch, Jack walked me out to a yellow Lamborghini. I did my best not to smirk. It wasn't a vehicle for someone who wanted to keep a low profile, and I couldn't tell if he was purposely trying to attract attention to us or if he was just trying to impress me. Either way, I decided not to comment on the car.
“How do you like my parents?” Jack asked as we pulled out onto the highway.
“They're nice.”
“Good.”
And that was the end of conversation until we arrived at his lavish mansion. Looking up at the towering red-brick structure, it was hard to imagine that this would be my new home soon. More a castle than a house, it was bigger than any single man could ever need.
Like a perfect gentleman, Jack came around to open the door for me. Then he took me by my hand and led me up the walkway.
“Soon, I'll be carrying you over this threshold.” I could hear the smile in his voice as he ushered me inside, and a faint warmness entered my heart from his sweet words. How could a man this outwardly gentle and courteous have such dark fantasies?
Jack took me on the grand tour, showing me all ten bedrooms, his home theater, game room, home gym, indoor swimming pool, and even a small bowling alley. It seemed a bit excessive, definitely built for the needs of a bachelor who likely entertained guests frequently. My mind swam with images of the two of us enjoying all of those rooms together once we were married.
Finally, he led me to a door with a keypad next to it. Jack gazed at it nervously, stuffing his hands in his pockets before turning his eyes to mine. “This room, I'll show you when you get back from the school.”
“It's a dungeon, isn't it?”
My boldness caught him off guard. “Yes, it is.”
“Then you might as well show me now. I already know what it is. There's no point in hiding it from me.”
Jack's cool disposition was suddenly rattled. It would have made me smile if not for the seriousness of the situation. The contents of the room would give me a better idea of what he would expect of me, and I needed to see it so that I could psychologically prepare myself for when I returned.
Jack hesitated for a moment before entering the passcode into the keypad. The door slid open soundlessly, and he leaned in to turn on the light.
I did my best to still my nerves as I stepped inside. The dungeon looked like something straight out of a horror movie, with manacles hanging from the walls and ceiling. There was a wooden sawhorse upholstered with rich black leather in one corner of the room. In another, was a stockade with a t-bar. I could only assume that it was meant for the person to be restrained while bending over. Against the back wall was a queen bed. It would have been the only innocent looking piece of furniture in the room if not for the steel shackles that were welded onto the bed posts.
“What do you think?” Jack asked as he watched me cross the room to look at the wall that had a rack of paddles, riding crops, and whips neatly displayed on it.
I sighed, searching for the right words to say that wouldn't offend him or make our time in the room any more awkward. “I don't know what to think.”
“I realize that it's a bit overwhelming for you.” He cautiously stepped up behind me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders. My body instantly tensed at his touch. “But we'll be happy together. I promise.”
How could he make such a promise without even knowing me? It was like saying that a lion could co-exist peacefully with a lamb without knowing the true nature of the beasts. One predator, the other prey. I knew which animal I felt like at that moment.
“I scheduled your flight for Sunday,” he said matter-of-factly, dropping the loving fiancé act but still sounding gentle. “You'll arrive in Sacramento where a limousine will take you to the facility in Napa Valley. It's a private place. Very quaint and beautiful. Nestled among grape vines and rolling hills. I think you'll enjoy the ambiance. I know I did when I toured the place.”
“You toured the place?” I wasn't sure why I sounded surprised. My mind was muddled with shock that I was leaving so soon, among other things. It was yet another surreal moment that my brain was having a difficult time coping with.
“Of course I did. There's no way I would send you to a school without approving it myself first.” Jack hugged me tenderly, and for some reason, I did find it comforting.
“Everything is happening so fast. I didn't expect it to be like this,” I admitted.
“What did you expect it to be like?”
I was too embarrassed to tell him the truth. Perhaps it wasn't what I had expected, but it was what I had hoped for—that Jack would be like Liam, sweet and romantic, but with a bit more money and style. I had imagined that he would wine and dine me, sweep me off of my feet and romance me like a fairytale princess. I had imagined us sitting up late at night, telling each other stories of our childhoods—relating on so many levels to growing up wealthy and over protected. I had hoped that Jack would be a kindred spirit—the man of my dreams—the perfect husband.
“I don't know what I expected,” I told him finally.
Jack knew it was a lie but didn't press any further. “Let's get out of here,” he whispered. “I would not see you frown a second longer.”
We left the dismal dungeon and headed out onto the road for some sight-seeing. Everywhere we went, I could feel eyes on us, analyzing our relationship. The paparazzi made an appearance when we toured the Statue of Liberty, and I did my best to seem as poised as possible. Jack was more than willing to pose for the cameras, gathering me up in his arms and placing a confident kiss on my cheek, as if we had already spent a lifetime together. I admired the way he catered to the media, always polite no matter how invasive they became. I only hoped I could hold myself together so well when they got me alone.
For dinner, Jack took me out to eat at Masa, an exquisite Japanese restaurant in the Time Warner Center. The experience was fun and refreshing, considering that there were no menus to order from. We spent three hours receiving course after course of seafood, sushi, and truffle items. By the time we left, I was practically waddling, I was so full.
“That was absolutely amazing,” I told Jack as we climbed back into his Lamborghini.
“I'm glad you liked it,” he replied, simply staring at me.
“What is it?” I felt my cheeks burning from his intense gaze.
“I think this is only the second time I've seen you smile since you've been here.”
“That's not true.” I was certain I had smiled plenty, so much that my face ached from it.
“I mean genuinely.” The corners of his lip curled into a grin. “I can tell when you're faking it.”
“How?”
“Because your eyes don't wrinkle at the corners when you fake smile.”
“Are you saying I look old?” My mouth dropped open in mock disbelief, and I could tell by Jack's expression that he seriously believed he had offended me.
“No, I don't mean that at all—“
“Jack, it's alright,” I cut him off. “I was just playing. I know what you're talking about. There's a muscle around the eye called the orbicularis oculi. It contracts when someone's smile is genuine, producing laugh lines.”
He ran his hands through his hair. “Wow, beautiful and smart. I really hit the jackpot.”
I ignored his sudden awkwardness. “Watching the sushi masters prepare the sushi was like watching a painter create art. It was a truly magical experience, and I greatly appreciate it.”
“We'll experience many more magical moments together.” His tone softened.
By the time we returned to Jack's parents' house, they had already gone to bed. He walked me to the door, pausing to gaze deeply into my eyes. My heart pounded from thoughts of every romance movie I'd ever seen. This was the part where the boy kissed the girl.
I tried to steady myself, allowing my eyes to fall to Jack's lips. They were thin, with a short layer of dark stubble surrounding them. His breathing changed, and I noticed the slight movement of his body as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other. It felt like an eternity before anything happened, and I tried not to seem too expectant as I stood there, waiting for him to kiss me.
Almost too suddenly, Jack leaned in and placed a chaste kiss on the side of my mouth, sweet and innocent. I wanted more but didn't dare advance on him. It was his job to take charge. That's what I had always been taught, at least. A proper lady never kissed a man first.
“I'll see you tomorrow,” Jack muttered before leaving me there dumbstruck.
What a mystery Jack Kemble was to me. One minute, he was calm and collected. The next, he was like a shy little schoolboy on the playground. For someone who had supposedly been with dozens of women, he seemed clueless about what women actually wanted.
I sighed as I lay in bed, staring up at the ceiling and letting my mind deconstruct the day piece by piece. Flowers at lunch, a ride in the Lamborghini, and a fancy dinner at Masa. Jack was obviously trying to impress me. And then there was the dungeon, the confident kiss for the paparazzi, and the not so confident kiss on the front stoop. It was strange to realize that he appeared to be more vulnerable when we were alone together, and I couldn't help but feel that Jack was hiding something from me, though I couldn't figure out what it was.
Thankfully, I was able to get to sleep at a decent hour and woke the next morning in time for breakfast. I trotted downstairs with refreshed vigor. The more I thought about it, things were going fairly well, aside from the strange request for me to attend the BDSM school. Jack had been a perfect gentleman, for the most part, and I was certainly not unhappy when in his presence.
During the week, Jack had to work at his corporation, so I spent most of the day trailing behind his mother, going to get pampered at the spa and planning the wedding. It quickly became clear that she thought it was her wedding, not mine, but I didn't bother to argue. There had been few things in my life that I had actually had a say in since coming to New York. Why should my wedding be any different? I resigned myself to nodding and smiling, giving my opinion when it was asked of me, and keeping quiet otherwise. These were the cards that I had been dealt, so I would play them with as much grace as I could.
In the evening, Jack would pick me up for dinner. He would always take me somewhere over the top, like DaNeil's or GILT at the New York Palace Hotel. As the week progressed, he seemed much more comfortable around me, and I around him. We talked about his day at work, my day with his mom, how the wedding preparations were going, and changes I would like to make to his mansion whenever we were married. The only inclusion I specifically requested was a room where I could work on my paintings. My concert grand pedal harp could go in the living room next to his baby grand piano.
Every night, when he dropped me back off at his parents' house, he'd give me a chaste kiss on the side of the mouth, and every night, I'd want more.
The night before my flight to Sacramento, Jack arranged for an intimate dinner at his mansion. I was pleasantly surprised by the romantic ambiance as he escorted me into his dining room. The long mahogany table was set with fine China, and dim candle light played off the walls from taper candles that were placed strategically around a fresh flower centerpiece. The scent of the blooms mingled in with the tantalizing aroma of cooked fish in a white butter crème sauce. Everything looked and smelled exquisite.
“Are you nervous about tomorrow?” Jack asked before taking a sip of Chenin Blanc. The dry white wine wasn't particularly to my liking, but I did my best to pretend, nursing my glass with little enthusiasm towards it.
“Of course I am,” I replied. “To be honest, I don't have much experience with things of a sexual nature.”
“Well, being a virgin, I would assume not,” he paused. “I called the school and personally went over your curriculum with them and approved all of your classes, had them take out the ones that you won't need, and replace them with ones that I thought would benefit you.”
“So, what classes do you think will benefit me?”
“You'll just have to wait and see.” A mischievous grin crossed Jack's face.
“So mysterious, you are, Mister Kemble. Naturally. I am curious though why you have a BDSM fetish.” I poke at my fish with my fork.
The tension in the room was palpable as he tensed up, and I almost immediately regretted asking the question. If I wasn't to see Jack again for an entire week, I didn't want our last night spent together to be awkward.
“I'll tell you after we're married,” he replied in a tone that suggested I should not press the subject further. Still, it felt like he was hiding too much, and the longer I sat in his presence, the more it nagged at me.
“You know, I still don't feel comfortable about being sent off so soon after arriving here.”
“It's a little late to back out now.”
“I'm not planning on backing out. I would just like more of an explanation as to why this is necessary.”
His voice rose a notch, “I already told you why it's necessary.”
We spent the rest of the meal in silence. While my mind was swimming with questions, I knew better than to irritate Jack with them. The mood had already been soured, and I had no idea how to fix it.
That night, I missed Liam more than I ever had before. How I longed to be wrapped in the comfort of his strong arms with my head on his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat.
As my mind raced on past midnight, my desperation for something familiar grew. Though I had told myself that I wouldn't speak to Liam again until after the wedding so as not to cause drama between Jack and me, my need for him was overwhelming. I turned my bedside table light on and reached for my phone, taking a deep breath before I pressed the button that would dial Liam's number.
The phone rang twice before Liam answered, his voice filled with concern. “Melita, what is it? What's happened?”
At first, I was startled by his reaction, but then I remembered the time.
“I just miss you,” I whispered, trying to hide my despair.
“I miss you too. But it's so late; I thought something had happened.”
“I'm sorry. I just needed to hear your voice.”
His tone steadied. “Is it bad there?”
It took everything in me to hide my overwhelming emotions. “It's not bad, just different.”
“I don't think you'd call me at nearly two in the morning for different.”
“The wedding is just stressing me out. There's so much to do and not a whole lot of time.”
“You are the absolute worst liar in the world. Do you know that?”
“I don't want to talk about what's wrong right now. I just want to . . . listen to you breathe, and hear your voice. I have nothing here that reminds me of home. No one to turn to for comfort. I just . . . need you right now.”
“I can be on my way in an hour.”
Family, I reminded myself. You're doing this for your family. You have to stay strong for your family. Everything will work out in the end. It always does.
“I'm sorry to have called you so late. Everything's fine. I just . . . wanted to hear your voice. We should both get to bed. I have another big day tomorrow,” I said solemnly.
“Are you sure you don't need for me to come get you?”
“No. I'll be fine.” I wanted to tell him that I loved him, but even though it was true, it would feel like a betrayal to Jack, so I ended the conversation on a simple goodbye before hanging up and letting my tears carry me away to dreamland.
At eight in the morning, my phone alarm woke me with a start. My flight was set to leave at 10:45 AM and Jack didn't arrive any earlier than needed to load my luggage into the trunk of the limo and be on our way.
The drive was nice and quiet, partly because I was still half asleep and partly because there didn't seem to be anything left to say. It was far too late for me to back out.
“I can't go with you into the airport,” Jack told me as we pulled up to the drop-off area. It was best that the paparazzi didn't know that Jack Kemble was sending his bride-to-be off to some kinky fetish school. The tabloids would have a field day with that information. “I promise that things will be different when you get back. Better. You'll see,” he tried to reassure me.
Before I left the limo, I was given one of Jack's trademark kisses on the side of the mouth, and I could feel a strange sense of intimacy radiating from him, as if at that moment, he considered trying for more. The thought made my heart beat faster, even though I wasn't sure if I wanted him to kiss me full on the lips or not. Part of me felt like he hadn't earned it yet.
The flight to Sacramento was long and exhausting. Thankfully, I was able to sleep through most of it. By the time I arrived at the Sacramento airport, gathered my bags, and was in the limo headed toward Napa Valley, it was already eight o'clock at night. The only thing I had been looking forward to about the entire trip was seeing the Napa Valley wine country, and it was the one thing I was denied. I scowled into the darkness. Oh well, there was always the drive back.
After what felt like forever, the limo finally turned off of the highway and began snaking up a private driveway. We pulled up to a building that appeared to be a small resort. There were no signs on the outside to indicate the type of business, and for a moment, I wondered if I had been driven to the wrong place by mistake. Secretly, I wouldn't have minded. This place certainly looked a lot more inviting than the dingy building I had pictured inside my head.
“Here we are, ma'am,” the driver said as he opened the door for me.
“Where's here?” I asked curiously, looking towards the doors to the resort.
“The Napa Valley Body Awareness Resort.”
Just then, an elderly gentleman in a suit and tie came out to greet me. “You must be Miss Rickard,”
“Yes.” I shook his withered hand gingerly.
“I'm Master Neil. I'll be your instructor for tomorrow, but for now, allow me to show you to your room. You've had a long trip, and I'm sure you're tired. Have you eaten yet?”
“No, sir.”
I allowed Master Neil to take my suitcase, and I followed him into the building and to the front desk where I was required to fill out paperwork.
The sound of the limousine driving away left a pit of sickness in my stomach. Now I was stuck here, for better or worse, for an entire week, with no way to escape.
When I was done with the paperwork, Master Neil showed me to my room, a surprisingly lavish suite on the second floor of the resort. I sighed in relief at the normalcy of it.
“Class will begin promptly at ten o'clock in the morning. I will expect you to be downstairs and ready to participate. You said you have not yet eaten. Please, let me know what I can have our chefs prepare for you.”
“I'll just take a turkey sandwich on wheat,” I replied, still admiring the décor of the room. To be honest, I was too nervous to look Master Neil in the eyes—too afraid that I might see impure intentions behind a courteous facade.
Despite the seemingly normal ambiance of the place, my mind could not forget where I was. Somewhere in this resort, I knew there was a dungeon, just as there was inside of Jack Kemble's mansion. It amazed me how innocent things could look on the outside while harboring such dark secrets within.
Master Neil left, and I sighed in relief, walking into the bedroom and throwing myself down on the plush queen bed. I felt strangely at peace in the room, despite knowing where I was at. It would be my safe haven from all the craziness I would experience in the coming week—the only place I would be able to hide from everything.
It only took twenty minutes for the sandwich to be delivered. I ate it at the small dining room table while looking over a pamphlet for the resort. The Napa Valley Body Awareness Resort, it said on the front, with a picture of the resort in the daytime. It appeared even more beautiful in the light than it had in the darkness, with soft tones of red clay set against the backdrop of rolling hills and grape vines, just as Jack had said it would be. Inside, the pamphlet discussed finding awareness of oneself through sexual experimentation and power play. The resort promised to broaden my horizons.
I couldn't help but smirk at the professionalism of it all. Perhaps Jack had been right. Maybe I had nothing to fear from my stay here. One thing was for certain, I would find out tomorrow.
After lazily consuming my sandwich, I changed into my pajamas and crawled into bed. Nervous anticipation kept me awake until two in the morning, and I was beginning to wonder if I'd ever get a decent night's sleep.
It took everything in me to drag myself out of bed the next morning and get ready. The closer it got to the time I was supposed to go downstairs, the more I wished the school had been in an urban area. At least that way, I could have made a last minute escape. My stomach was all nerves and nausea, twisted too tightly for hunger. I knew I'd probably regret it later, but I decided to skip breakfast and wait until the very last minute to go downstairs to the lobby.
I was surprised to find three other women waiting in the lobby. Two of them were around my age, while the third was slightly older than my mother. They smiled brightly as I sat next to the older woman on the sofa. One of them, a petite blonde, began to speak, but almost as soon as she opened her mouth, Master Neil rounded the corner to greet us.
“Good morning, ladies,” he said with enthusiasm.
“Good morning,” came the small chorus of polite responses.
“Today we'll begin with a tour. After that, I have a questionnaire that I need you all to fill out. Then I have a video for you to watch before we break for lunch. After lunch, we'll go over the rules of the school and an overview of the classes. At that time, you may ask any questions you have. After the overview, we'll have a lecture until the end of the day,” he explained.
It didn't sound bad at all, and I sighed in relief, thankful that today's curriculum didn't appear to be too bizarre.
“Shall we?” Master Neil gestured towards a hallway that I hadn't noticed the night before.
Without further delay, everyone stood to follow him. The first room Master Neil took us to was a small classroom, barely large enough to fit the sixteen desks that were in it. He explained that we would spend our lecture portion of the course in there. The next room he showed us was the dining room, which looked like a typical resort restaurant. Master Neil informed us that the head chef was available at all times to prepare whatever our hearts desired within healthy limitations. “A healthy body produces a healthy mind,” he added before moving on to show us the fitness center and indoor pool that we were allowed to use during our off time. There was also a laundry facility and day spa on the premises.
The next room he showed us was the one I had been anticipating since arriving, the dreaded dungeon. Inside, the set up was far more impressive than what Jack had in his mansion. I was certain that if there was a device created for restraining someone or inflicting pain on them, it could be found in this room. From a spanking bench to a St. Andrew's Cross, the room was jam-packed with furniture. Manacles hung from the ceiling with chains that ran to the walls where wenches could be used to raise or lower a person. It was a bit extravagant, but I would have expected nothing less from a BDSM school.
“This is our dungeon,” Master Neil explained as if it wasn't obvious. “We'll be doing most of our hands-on training in here.”
The familiar knot twisted itself in my stomach. Hands-on training. That meant they would eventually end up getting physical with me. It was a sickening thought.
The final room he showed us was a small windowless room that only had three chairs and a restraining table in it. For some reason, it made me feel claustrophobic, and I instantly disliked the room.
“Some of you will also get hands-on training in here as well,” Master Neil told us before leading us back to the classroom. “Sit wherever you'd like and begin filling out the questionnaire that's been provided,” he indicated the stacks of papers that were placed on every desk, despite there only being four of us. “I'll return in about an hour to collect them from you and start the video.”
Everyone seemed eager to learn, filling up the front row. I took the seat closest to the door, in case I had thoughts of making my grand escape, not that I actually would. Where could I possibly escape to in the middle of nowhere? Liam. I could always call Liam, I told myself as I stared off into space.
“I'm Mary,” the older lady sitting next to me introduced herself, breaking me from my thoughts.
“Oh, hello. I'm Melita.” I smiled at her, though I knew I had probably failed to make it look genuine. It wasn't that I wasn't happy to meet her; it was just my overwhelming nerves hampering my social skills.
“This is exciting, isn't it?” Her large brown eyes had a sparkle in them.
“I suppose.” I looked back down to my questionnaire, grasping the provided pencil in hand to begin filling it out.
The packet was thick, and as I skimmed through it, I realized that it would, in fact, take an hour to complete. I did my best to stifle an annoyed sigh before jotting my name, age, and the date on the top line. After I had filled out the basics, I scanned down to question number one.
The first page appeared to be all medical related questions. It asked about medical conditions, psychological conditions, any medications that I was taking, and if I was a drug user.
The next page got into the grittier stuff, such as my level of sexual experience and experience with BDSM. I answered “none” to both questions. Then it asked about my level of interest in various activities. The list itself went on for seven pages, and I was certain it encompassed every sexual thing any person on the face of the entire planet had ever come up with. Some were abhorrent, like forced bed wetting and being used as someone's toilet. I was supposed to put a number between zero and five next to each act to indicate how willing I was to try it. Most of the stuff seemed absolutely horrible. Things like asphyxiation and needle play, I knew I would never want to do.
The more I sat there and read the list, the more repulsed I felt. I swear, the first time someone tries to pee on me, I'm calling Liam to come get me and calling off this whole stupid marriage. In a fit of frustration, I zeroed the entire list, not even bothering to go over each item individually. For the rest of the packet, I wrote none, no, or zero wherever the most negative and unwilling responses would go. I did not want to be here, and I planned to make it known.
Having hurriedly completed the questionnaire before the other girls, I simply sat and watched them in my peripheral vision as they finished theirs. They all seemed very attentive to the questions, going over each one carefully. One of the girls, a modelesque brunette, had a smile on her face through the entire thing, and Mary seemed to be writing a paragraph for each question that required a short written response. It took her all the way up until Master Neil returned to finish, and even then I wasn't sure if she had fully completed it.
Quietly, he collected our papers and then went to the wall-mounted TV in the corner of the room to set up a video before leaving again. I looked across the row of seats, hoping that someone would be interested in conversation, but all eyes were glued to the television as the video began to play.
“Welcome to the Napa Valley Body Awareness Resort,” it began with an image of the resort. “We take pride in providing the most professional and intimate body awareness classes in the entire country. Our top of the line establishment is well equipped to train our students in a variety of things, including: domination, submission, bondage, and kink play. Our professional staff will guide you every step of the way, providing you with a comfortable and safe environment to explore your sexuality.”
About fifteen minutes into the video, Master Neil peaked his head inside the door. “Melita, can I see you for a moment?”
The other girls didn't take their eyes off the screen as I slunk out of the classroom, following Master Neil down the hall to a small office. He gestured to one of the two chairs that faced his desk and then quietly closed the door as I took a seat.
“I wanted to talk to you about the answers on your questionnaire,” he began, sliding into the plush black office chair across from me. “You didn't want to come here, did you?”
“No,” I admitted quickly. “My fiancé signed me up for these classes. I have absolutely zero interest in BDSM, as is indicated on my questionnaire.”
A warm smile crossed his aged face, and I could tell that he found the situation amusing. “It appears that Mister Kemble left out that little tidbit during our conversation earlier this week.”
“I'm not surprised. Mister Kemble tends to leave out a lot.”
Master Neil leaned back in his chair, steepling his hands. “I saw on your questionnaire that you have no experience with BDSM, and I know from my conversation with Mister Kemble that you don't have much experience with anything else either. Is that correct, or is that just something that you told him so that he wouldn't send you here?”
This question caught me off guard, and I felt my face flush in unmerited embarrassment because of it. “That is correct. I am a virgin. I didn't just make it up to get out of this.”
“Listen.” Master Neil leaned back again. “I know that this is all new to you, and I know that you're scared. That's natural, especially for someone in your rare, delicate position. You need to understand, though, that we're not here to hurt you or corrupt you. What we're here to do is help enrich your life.
“Mr. Kemble has given us explicit instructions to start with the very basics. We're not going to just toss you into the middle of the BDSM world and expect you to sink or swim. You have nothing to worry about, I assure you,” his voice sounded genuine, but I still didn't trust it. “I need to know, though, before we begin, that you're willing to actually give this a chance. If you do not give consent, then you shouldn't even be here. I won't force you to stay.”
While leaving sounded incredibly appealing, I had to remember that the happiness of my marriage could potentially be on the line if I did.
“Do you think that this is a good fit for me?” I asked shyly, letting my vulnerability shine through.
A warm smile creased Master Neil's lips. “I think that you're a blank slate, and that makes you a perfect candidate to benefit from the classes we offer.”
It sounded very generic, but I decided to take it as a yes.
“I'll tell you what,” he continued. “Go finish watching the video with the rest of the girls. There are about thirty minutes left. After the video, we're going to break for lunch. Let me know what you want to do then. If you still want to leave, I'll arrange for a limo to come pick you up.”
I nodded, my mind feeling a bit more at ease.
Master Neil escorted me back to the classroom and then took his leave.
“What did he want?” Mary leaned over to whisper.
“He wanted to know if I want to leave.”
“Why would you want to leave?”
“Because I didn't sign up for this. My fiance signed me up for it.”
“Oh.” She paused for a moment. “Well, you should stay. It's going to be a whole lot of fun.”
It was obvious we had a different idea of what fun was.
While my eyes stared at the images on the screen for the next thirty minutes, my mind was worlds away, fighting an epic battle of should I stay or should I go. I went over the list of pros and cons in my head, trying to see which way the scale was tipped.
I sighed, knowing that this just wasn't for me.
About five minutes before the end of the video, Master Neil returned to the room to watch the ending with us.
“It's time for lunch,” he said as he turned off the television. “I'll expect you all to meet me back here in an hour.”
“We should eat together,” Mary told me.
“I'll be along shortly.” I smiled at her, again falling flat with my genuine happiness.
She nodded and was out the door with the rest of the women.
“So, have you made your decision?” Master Neil asked after everyone had left.
“Yes.” I took a deep breath before responding. “I've decided to leave.”