I usually avoided this place like the plague. It smelled of death. That was the only way I could explain it. The scents of blood, sweat and dead animals permeated every inch of this underground hell making it almost impossible to breath in the thick stagnant air.
Straightening my shoulders, I walked through the training gym of the Dungeon, forcing myself to nod politely at the new fighters’ trainers and sponsors filling up every inch of spare space. Well, I say “fighters.” They were mostly rapists, murderers, and generally just sick motherfuckers used by various mobs and career criminals to make a quick buck. No one would miss them if they died in the ring. In fact, it would be a blessing to society, in my opinion.
I didn’t mind my job. I was good at it. I was the sponsor recruiter for the Dungeon. My duty was securing the sponsors, arranging collections on gambling debts and finding only the best fighters for our enterprise. And I never failed to deliver excellent fighters, season after season. That didn’t mean the sight of these men didn’t make my skin crawl. I generally worked from home, thank God. Being in this place of death day by day would drive me insane. I had no idea how Kisa did it. I sighed in relief that I was finally getting a break. I was getting to leave Brooklyn for the next couple of months. I was using my long overdue vacation days to just check out of this life for a short reprieve.
After everything that had happened over the last year I needed a breather. I needed to not be Talia Tolstaia, the great Ivan Tolstoi’s daughter, just for a while. I needed to be somewhere new. I just hoped my father wasn’t going to flip his shit when I told him I was going.
Heading into Kisa’s office, I walked through, shutting the door behind me. Kisa was sitting behind her desk typing away on her computer. “Hey, Kisa,” I called, and moved to sit in the chair in front of her.
Kisa lifted her head from her work and I frowned. “You okay? You look kind of green,” I said, seeing Kisa run her hand over her clammy head.
She batted her hand in front of her face. “I’m good, Tal. Just feel like I may be coming down with something.”
“You sure? Seems you’ve been like this a while,” I questioned.
Kisa threw me her usual bright smile. “Yeah, honest.”
Lifting off my chair, I took the register of new fighters and their sponsors for the Dungeon’s fighting ring and laid them on her desk. “Here’s all the information you’ll need while I’m gone. If you need anything else, I’ll only be a phone call or an e-mail away.”
Kisa took the folder and placed it in a draw before leaning back in her chair. “Thanks, Tal.” Her eyes dropped to the table, then she looked at me again. “I wish you weren’t going. I know you’ll only be a couple of hours away, and Christ knows you deserve the rest, but I hate the thought of not seeing you every day. It’ll be weird.”
Moving around the room to drop my ass to the edge of her desk, I winked playfully. “It’s my winning personality, Kisa. You’re addicted to me.”
Kisa laughed and patted my knee. “I am. There hasn’t been a vacation in our lives that we haven’t gone on together.”
My smile faded and I squeezed her hand on my knee. “I know, dorogaya moya. But after this past year—Luka coming home, my parents coming to terms with the fact their son was turned into a straight-up killer, and now the recent news that the Jakhua Georgian’s are back in Brooklyn to probably start a war with us, I just need a fucking time-out from it all, you know?”
Kisa exhaled a long breath and nodded her head. “I know what you mean. It’s been intense.” Kisa glanced away and I caught her blue eyes shimmering.
Leaning forward, I placed my hand on her shoulder. “Hey, what’s wrong?”
Kisa didn’t move for a few seconds, but then looked to me again. “Luka’s been having nightmares again. He’s not in a good place lately, Tal. I don’t know what to do.”
My stomach tensed. “Why? What’s wrong with him?”
Kisa got to her feet and stood before me, throwing me a dismissive smile. “Nothing for you to worry about.” I went to argue that fact, but Kisa pulled me to my feet and wrapped me in her arms. “Go on your break, Tal, relax, find your happiness again, and come back refreshed. You never know, by the time you return everything might be back to normal—the Jakhua’s may be dead and buried, Luka may have made a full recovery, everything swimming along nicely.”
I hugged Kisa back and, after a few seconds, she pulled away. Her lips pulled into a wry smile. “One can dream, hey? One thing’s for sure, there’s never a dull moment in the wonderful world of Volkov!”
“Yeah,” I replied, forcing a laugh. Then I hesitated knowing there was something more she wasn’t telling me. She was acting weird.
Kisa rolled her eyes at me as I stared. “Tal, go. I’ve got everything covered here.”
I headed to the door, but stopped to say, “Do you think Luka will be okay?”
Kisa wrapped her arms around her waist. “I’m sure he will. I’ve left him in bed today. He had a rough night. I’m going to meet with our fathers this afternoon to see if they can help him.”
I frowned. “What needs to be done? You’re being very vague, Kisa.”
Kisa gave me a tired smirk. “Just something from his gulag days, a piece of information that’s been playing on Luka’s mind. I’m hoping our fathers can shed some light on it. It’s what Luka needs to finally embrace his training as the future pakhan. I think my father’s getting antsy about how distracted Luka is. I think he’s doubting whether he has what it takes to lead the brotherhood one day.”
Walking back to Kisa one last time, my stomach rolling at yet another arising issue my brother now had to overcome, I gave her a tight hug and kissed her cheek. “Anytime you need me, you call. And if you need a break yourself come to see me. You shouldn’t have to take all of this on either. It’s starting to make you ill.” Kisa tensed in my arms. “Promise me, Kisa,” I pushed.
She nodded against my shoulder. “I promise, Tal. And … thank you,” she whispered.
With both hands on her shoulders, I pushed her back to stare her straight in the eyes. “You’re my sister, Kisa. That was true even before you married my brother. It’s been me and you, always. Sisters ‘til the end.”
Kisa wiped a stray tear that had fallen and she waved her hands at me in a shooing motion. “Go. Get on the road to avoid traffic. Rest. Eat lots of chocolate and, most importantly, have some fun. We don’t have enough fun round these parts.”
I let out a single laugh. “I’ve got to tell my father I’m off first. My mama knows the score, we’ve planned it together, but we figured suddenly surprising my father that I’m taking a break would go over better than giving him time to talk me out of it. You know he’ll try and guilt me into staying.”
Kisa chuckled and said, “I’ve always envied you, Tal. You do what you want, when you want. I could never do that. I was too busy trying to be the perfect Russian daughter.” She huffed to herself. “For all the damn good it did me.”
I sobered at Kisa’s compliment, and something down deep caused me to confess, “I wouldn’t envy me too much, Kisa. I may live on my own terms more than most in this life, but you’ve got the one thing I’d give anything to have. Sacrifice anything to have.”
“What’s that?” Kisa asked, her face now confused.
I fought a lump in my throat. “Love. You’ve got someone who adores you probably more than you do him. I’m on my own, have always been on my own. I’d give anything to have that soul-shattering type of love. But how that’ll happen in this life is beyond me. Who the hell’s going to date the daughter of a Bratva boss?”
Kisa’s eyes filled with sympathy. “Tal—”
I held up my hand. “Shit. I’m talking nonsense.” I paused, then forced a smile. “I’d better go, Kisa. I’ll see you soon, okay?”
I left the office before Kisa could say anything more, all the time rubbing the dull ache of loneliness in my chest that my little confession had brought on.
I needed this break.
I’d earned this break.
I wanted to be normal.
I wanted to be plain old normal Talia from Brooklyn, if only for a little while.