“You look different today,” Dr. Chase—or Joanna, as she prefers to be called—says as she twirls a pen in her hand. The woman is entirely too perceptive. I could utter just a few words, and she is able to put a picture together that is too close for comfort at times. I can see why Lucian likes her, though. Her casual form of therapy is surprisingly relaxing. Sure, we’ve had some tough conversations, but I always feel better afterward. I’ve come to think of her as the type of mother figure I always wanted. I’d never confided in either of my parents. They didn’t want to hear about school, boys, or arguments with friends. To them, I left home to get an education and anything else was a silly waste of time. Unless it was an affiliation beneficial to furthering their social connections.

I try but am unable to completely keep a smile from my face. I suspect I’m blushing as well but hope she won’t notice in the dim lamplight that she favors. “I’m enjoying being back at work,” I reply evasively and know there’s no way she’ll let it go at that. The woman is a human bloodhound.

She props her legs farther under her, displaying wacky knee socks that make me like her even more. She could give a rat’s ass about fashion. “That’s wonderful. Congratulations.” She looks pleased with my news, and I think she’s actually been derailed until she says, “Have you and Max been intimate since our last session?” My mouth drops open, and she gives me a slight grin as if to say gotcha!

“I—er … well, hell yes,” I grumble. “I fall for that every time.” Rolling my eyes, I add, “You lure me and take me down.”

Not offended in the least, she laughs and props her head in her hand. “It’s my superpower.” She fixes me with one of her intent stares and asks, “So how was it?” When I lift a brow, she clarifies, “I mean, were you comfortable with the aftermath? Sex can bring forth some intense emotions, especially when you have feelings for the other person.”

I know that Joanna has been wary of Max and I having relations for fear that any problems between us might cause me to cut again. After all, it’s only been a few weeks since my last time, and I’d be lying if I said I haven’t had the urge. Overall, I’m coping, but I also realize I haven’t been truly tested yet. Other than a few stilted emails, my parents have avoided me since I got home from the hospital, and Max has been there every step of the way to keep me from dwelling on anything for very long. I know I can’t remain in this bubble forever, though, and that eventually, a stressor may come along and shake my strength. “It was amazing,” I say truthfully. “I feel closer to him now, and he seems to feel the same. He’s been more affectionate, even before we had sex. This morning we—you know, did it again and it was slower—almost loving.”

“You seem surprised by that,” she astutely muses. “You’ve indicated before that he’s protective of you, but he appears to have something holding him back. Do you still feel that way?”

“To a degree,” I admit. “But it’s better than it was. As I said, he’s opening up more. We’re comfortable around each other and he kept touching me as we were getting ready and having breakfast together this morning.”

“So why don’t you ask him about his past?” she asks, sounding curious. “Are you afraid he won’t talk to you about it or is it something else?”

I run a hand through my hair, trying to gather my thoughts. I’m not sure why this question is hard, but then it hits me and I feel a moment’s panic. “I’m scared it will change things between us. What if he can never love me? Right now, I have hope that it will work out, but what if it’s taken away from me?”

“That’s everyone’s fear in a relationship, Rose,” she says gently. “To open yourself up to love is also to expose yourself to the possibility of loss. Unfortunately, you’re only living half a life without the risk.”

“But isn’t the reward worth it when it works out?” I ask, hesitantly. A woman my age shouldn’t be so damn uncertain of a man, but I can’t help it. I’ve never felt for anyone the way I do for Max. “Damn, you’re right. We probably shouldn’t have slept together.”

“Then why did you?” she asks, looking at me intently.

I blurt it out, knowing she can handle the truth. “Because I was horny and I’m also in love with him. The first was a very pressing need, and the second just made it that much better.” I’m surprised at how easily I’ve revealed the depth of my feelings for Max to Joanna. But there is just something about talking to someone who isn’t a part of our group. It’s almost as if I want to see her reaction before I tell the rest of the world.

Never one to be rattled by my off-color comments, she points her pen at me and says, “And there you have it, my friend. The two things that will make us go out onto a limb every time—love and lust. No one is immune to the power they hold, and it’s probably one of the best parts of that new relationship glow.” Then she reaches over and clasps one of my hands. “Enjoy this time, Rose, and take each moment as it comes. Continue to communicate with Max and be open about what you’re feeling. If you get overwhelmed or uncertain, then tell him. He’s your partner, not someone you need to protect. From what you’ve told me about him, he wants to be there for you, and as daunting as it may sound, you need to accept that and let him. Love and lust are wonderful, but trust is what will move you forward and give you the building blocks for a lasting foundation.” We spend the rest of the hour discussing my parents and also the dream I’d had off and on since childhood. As usual, when I leave, I’m exhausted while also feeling lighter. It’s not easy to reveal so many personal things, and at times, I want to resist. But at least I feel as if I’m beginning to face my problems instead of hiding from them. There’s a sense of the elusive control I’ve struggled to have for so many years. Could it have been as simple as letting someone in?

I take a cab back to the office. Lucian has insisted on loaning me a company car from Quinn Software until I’m able to afford something of my own. Someone is supposed to drop it by this afternoon. Strangely enough, Max hadn’t been too happy over it. He’d grumbled under his breath that he’d been planning to get me one. But I’d rather borrow one than let Max spend any more money on me. I’m not used to being the charity case in the group and it’s unsettling. I refused to accept Lia’s offer to pay me for the time I’d been off work. That was more of a handout than I could handle. At this rate, it’s already going to be months before I can pay Max back. And I know that’s going to be a fight. He’s made it clear that he does not intend to take my money. I don’t think he understands how important it is to me to feel as if I’m standing on my own two feet. Even if it takes me a while to do that without stumbling.

I pull my phone from my purse to check in with Max. He’s always concerned after one of my therapy sessions, and I want to send him a quick text to let him know that I survived. I go warm and mushy when I see a message already waiting from him.

Hey baby, thinking of you and hoping you had a good meeting with Joanna. Miss you.

I startle the cab driver when I throw my head back and begin laughing. Max Decker, normally reserved counselor extraordinaire, used a heart emoticon at the end of his text … and it’s about the sweetest thing ever. I hit the reply button and quickly type a response.

Everything went great. Miss you too. Can’t wait to be home.

I then add an emoticon of a kitten blowing kisses. It’s hard to believe that I’m doing something so normal with him. If he brings out the best in me, then I hope I do the same for him.

As giddy as I am, the fear is still there. I’ve opened myself to Max in a way that I never did with Jake. I’m terrified that, at some point, I’ll disappoint him, and he’ll realize that underneath it all, I’m just too big of a mess to deal with. I shake off the negative thoughts as soon as they come. I refuse to do that—to keep buying in to the shit my parents shoveled at me for years. At this point, they’re barely even a part of my life anymore. It’s all on me. I’m in charge now. There may be setbacks, and some days aren’t going to be rainbows and kittens, but dammit, the alternative is unacceptable. Failure could well end up in my death, and that’s no longer a risk I’m willing to overlook.

I step out of the car in front of my office and throw my shoulders back. “One day at a time,” I say under my breath, as I take another leap into the life I want to live.

At that point, I had no idea that my new resolve would be tested so soon.

---

Lucian and I take a seat at the conference room table at Quinn Software. Before we say more than a few words, Cindy escorts in Don Ellis, the investigator Lee Jacks had recommended. I’ve had several conversations with him on the telephone, but today is our first face-to-face. To date, he’s been terse yet professional, and as Lucian and I rise to our feet and introductions are made, I feel a little in awe. I wouldn’t want to be on the wrong side of this man.

Don pulls an iPad from his briefcase, and I have to smile at how things have changed. It seems as if handwritten notes are no longer the norm. I rather miss it sometimes. Although considering my vast collection of electronics, I don’t think I’d be willing to go back again. He scrolls through the screen before setting it down on the table and clearing his throat. “I found nothing unusual on Ms. Madden’s background check.” I feel a sense of something like disappointment. “But then I enhanced the search to include her family and things got a little interesting.”

When he pauses as if to gauge our reaction, Lucian waves an insistent hand and asks impatiently, “Are you going to continue, or are we supposed to guess?”

Instead of being offended at Lucian’s bluntness, Don smirks, which should have told me something big was coming. “There’s no record of Celia Madden having given birth—ever.”

I process his words before rubbing my neck to ease the tension building there. “So you’re saying that Rose was adopted?”

Don leans back in his chair and crosses his legs before shaking his head. “No. See, that’s the interesting part. I can’t find any record of that either, and believe me, I’ve been through every database there is—twice.”

“But isn’t that type of information sealed?” Lucian asks.

Don raises a brow as if to say, Come on. “I have ways around that. There is nothing sealed or otherwise to show that Rose Madden was adopted. Essentially, she has a birth certificate with nothing at all to back it up. That in itself is more common than you would think, but generally, there’s something criminal involved. Everyone has an origin, and if it’s being hidden, there’s a reason. I vaguely recall a case that we studied while I was in school at Stanford Law. It’s been a while since I’ve delved into family law, but I do recall very strict punishment.”

I’m grasping at straws, but I toss it out there anyway. “That’s probably not something that most people ever have checked. Maybe it’s a clerical error somewhere.”

“It’s not,” Don says flatly. “Her birth certificate is worth the paper it’s written on and that’s it. It looks completely normal until you research it and find that there are no actual records to support her birth occurring.”

Lucian tosses the pen he’s been holding on the table in frustration. “I knew there was something there. Maybe it’s time we confronted her parents. They’re a bunch of pretentious assholes, but I didn’t actually think they were criminals.”

Don holds a hand out hastily. “Don’t do that yet. If you tip them off, they’ll muddy the trail as much as they can. Right now, it’s been years since Rose’s birth, and I would imagine they’ve relaxed their guard. It’ll be easier to dig without them being suspicious.”

“Do you have any clues as to what we’re looking for?” I ask, still reeling from his news.

“I’ve been running checks into their household staff, going all the way back to when Celia would have supposedly been pregnant. I wanted to see if I could find anyone who might be willing to talk to me. In doing so, I’ve come across Carl and Patricia Wheeten, a husband and wife who worked for the Maddens for ten years. They both left right after Rose’s birth. They had a daughter who would have been fifteen at the time, Daisy Wheeten.”

Lucian shrugs his shoulder. “Okay. Do they still live locally?”

“Carl passed away a few years ago, and Patricia lives with her sister in Alabama. But Daisy’s the person I’d really like to speak with.” If he doesn’t provide more information, and soon, then I will snap. Having known Lucian for many years, I can sense his tension too. “She had a baby two days before Rose was born. And I haven’t found any record of that child from the time Daisy and her daughter left the hospital.”

“Fuck,” Lucian spits out.

The lawyer in me doesn’t believe in coincidences. “Did she name the baby Poppy?” I ask, and then hold my breath awaiting his reply.

He gives me a rueful smile. “That I don’t know. The birth certificate says Baby Wheeten. And it was never updated. There is also no father listed. Before you ask, I’ve checked the death records as well. If the baby died, it wasn’t recorded through official channels.”

“So my girlfriend’s a ghost,” I murmur uneasily. In a way, I’m relieved that she doesn’t appear to be the biological daughter of such assholes as the Maddens. But the question remains … who is she? Could there be a link to the Wheetens?

“She’s certainly a mystery,” Don agrees before getting to his feet. “I have a few leads to follow up on. I’ll be in touch as soon as I know more.”

Lucian walks him out, then returns to flop down in his chair. “We certainly don’t pick boring women to love, do we?”

“No, we don’t,” I agree wryly. “Which way are you leaning with all of this?”

He looks thoughtful for a moment. “I’d assume she was adopted if not for the fact that there’s nothing to support that. And I know my father-in-law well enough to guarantee that Don knows what he’s talking about. If he says he looked in all places, then he did. You and I both never believed that her recurring dream was random, and after what he said, I’m positive there’s more.”

“Are the Wheetens the key?” I ask, curious as to his take.

“I’ll be shocked as hell if they aren’t,” he replies instantly. “I’d just like to know where they’ve been for the last twenty-three years. I think we can rule out Rose being abducted because the Maddens are too high profile and have made no attempt to limit her exposure to the public. Exactly the opposite. They’ve lived in the same house since Rose was born. The Wheetens would know exactly where to find them. The daughter was fifteen when Rose was born, so certainly old enough to know where her baby went.”

I knock my fist against the table in frustration. “Then what in the hell are we missing?”

“I don’t know,” Lucian sighs. “But I’d love to rattle the cage of her pompous ass of a father and see what shakes out.” When I open my mouth to remind him of what Don said, he adds, “I know, and I won’t do anything—yet. But when and if we get the information that we need, all bets are off.”

“I’ll drive,” I deadpan, thinking I’d love nothing better than to have a few words with Hoyt Madden about the way he’s treated his daughter. He doesn’t deserve to have a woman like her in his life. Wherever this road leads, I’ll be there for her. She’s getting stronger every day. After years of having it shredded, I can see her self-confidence slowly building. I pray she’s strong enough for what lies ahead because I’m afraid her strength is going to be tested sooner than I would have liked. I’ll do everything in my power to ensure that she’s ready, but ultimately this is her life and she’ll be the one to suffer for the sins of her parents. But this time, she won’t suffer alone.

---

Lia is waiting for me in my office when I return. She looks nervous, and I’m instantly concerned. “What’s wrong?” I ask as I drop my purse onto my desk. “Is everything okay with Lucian and Lara?”

“Yeah, of course.” She waves away my question. Then she squeezes her eyes closed for a moment before opening them again. “Please don’t be mad at me. It just happened. I was getting a sandwich for lunch, and he was right there when I turned around. Then he asked about you, and, shit, I lost it, Rose. I went off on him, and now, you’re going to be pissed off.” She twists her hands together in agitation. “I didn’t mean to tell him anything. And now, he’s here wanting to see you. I tried to get him to leave. But it’s not working and—”

“Whoa.” She’s rambling as she always does when she’s upset, and I know this can go all day if I don’t stop her. Besides, I’m completely lost here. “What in the world are you talking about, chick? Let’s start with who you saw at lunch?”

She hesitates for a few seconds before saying, “Jake.”

I don’t know why, but I wasn’t expecting it to be him. Since that night at Leo’s, whenever he’s crossed my mind, I’ve instantly tried to redirect my thoughts. He does not deserve any more of my energy, thought, or time. “What happened?” I ask quietly, motioning Lia over to the small seating area in the corner. I close the door before sitting on the sofa next to her.

She takes my hand, although I think the support is more for her than me at this point. “I picked up my food and was turning to leave Greta’s and there he was. He asked how you were and where you were living now. He said he’s been by your apartment but found out you’d moved.” She cringes before adding, “I have no idea what came over me, but I was in his face before I could stop myself. Crap, Rose, I told him about what happened with his girlfriend and how much it upset you.”

“Lia!” I groan in horror. “Please say you didn’t tell him about my hospital trip after that?” The last thing I needed was Jake having more information to give to bitch Barbie and her friend. I was a laughing stock with them already.

“No, I didn’t tell him about that,” she hurriedly assures me. I let the breath out I’d been holding. “But I think he knew anyway, or maybe he was worried that something could have happened,” she adds, and my sense of relief flies right out the window.

Air. I need air. Space. I stand and begin pacing the distance of the small room. I can feel the sweat gathering at my temple. My hands are beginning to shake. No, Rose. You don’t have to submit to this attack. Listen to Joanna’s voice here, not your own. If you panic but stay in the situation until you calm down, your panic response will learn that it’s not the situation causing the panic. Okay, I can do this. Jake cannot hurt me. He will not cause a panicked response. Breathe in and breathe out. Yes, Rose, you can do this. I stop the pacing, ready to know more. I can’t imagine why Jake would care. It sounded from Barbie that he was happy to have me off his hands. “Why would he think that? Are you sure you didn’t accidentally let it slip?”

“Of course, not,” she snaps. “I believe I’d remember that.” Then, as if catching herself, she lowers her voice once again and gives me an apologetic smile. “You guys were together for a long time, Rose, and you said he knows about your—cutting. So wouldn’t it be reasonable to assume that he might be concerned?” When I don’t answer, she rushes on. “Anyway, I walked off and left him standing there after I gave him a piece of my mind. The next thing I know, the receptionist is ringing to let me know that he’s here. During my rant, I told him that you were doing great and we were working together. So he followed me here in hopes of seeing you. He insists that he only wants to apologize.”

I drop my head in my hands and moan, “Oh God. Why me? The man cheats on me, then makes fun of me to his girlfriend, and now, he wants what, forgiveness?” I laugh hysterically for a moment, prompting Lia to begin biting her nails. The poor thing, I’ve been back for two days and she’s on the edge of a nervous breakdown. I wonder if our relationship was like this in the past? Has my behavior caused Lia stress or have I hidden it so well that Lia had always seen me as the strong one? Flawless?

She stands and straightens her spine. I bite back a smile as I literally see her put on her game face. “I’ll get rid of him. If I have to, I’ll call the police and have them drag him out kicking and screaming.”

A giggle escapes as that mental picture presents itself. It would almost be worth it. But maybe I need to put the big-girl panties on and fight my own battles. Joanna and I haven’t tackled the AWARE technique yet, but she has explained it to me, and I can recall the first letter. A – Accept the anxiety. Don’t try to fight it. Avoiding Jake is just another way of running from my problems. He should be the one hiding, not me. I’ve done nothing wrong. “You know what? I will talk to him. I have a few things to say, and since he’s here, I’ll take advantage of it and unload.”

“Are you sure?” Lia asks looking uneasy. “Do you want me to stay with you?”

I have no idea why, but I hitch my pants up, then wince because now, I’ve got a wedgie. Shit, that always looks so much cooler in the movies. I discreetly pull them back down again and breathe a sigh of relief when things return to their rightful place. I throw my arm around her shoulders and give her a side hug. “I’ve got this, sweetie. And please don’t worry about any of it. I love you for wanting to kick his ass for me. You’re the best friend that anyone could have, and I’ve gotta say, I can see why Lucian can’t keep his hands off you. I was kind of turned on myself when you started all that raging about Jake.”

Lia blinks rapidly and then falls against the wall as laughter shakes her small frame. “You’re such a weirdo,” she gasps out. “For a minute there, you had me.”

I wiggle my brows as I push her aside and open the door. “Who says I was kidding?” I do my best to keep a straight face as I walk toward the reception area. She is so easy to shock. How could she still be so innocent after growing up in such an ugly environment? I am grateful that she has Lucian. He’ll forever keep the wolves at bay and no evil will darken her door again.

Any amusement I feel dies as I see my ex-boyfriend and the man I once thought I’d spend my life with perched on the edge of a leather chair in the waiting area. His foot is drumming nervously on the floor as he stares off into space. As if sensing my presence, he suddenly looks right at me, and I see his eyes widen before he gets to his feet. He stops a few inches away and puts his hands in his pockets. His voice is husky and deep as he says, “Rose, It’s … um, good to see you again.” Then he waves a hand to indicate my clothing. “You look different—beautiful—but not like yourself. Shit, that didn’t come out right. You always look good. It’s just, you’ve changed.” His usual confident manner is nowhere to be seen as he shifts on his feet before glancing over at the receptionist who’s watching us with rapt attention.

Not wanting to air my dirty laundry in public, I point down the hall. “Would you like to use one of the conference rooms?” My office would have been more private, but it’s also smaller and more intimate, and I’m not comfortable with that. Even though I realize it’s impossible, I still want to keep things as impersonal as I can. Plus, I don’t want him in my space. He doesn’t belong there.

“Yeah, that’d be great.” He sighs, sounding relieved.

I flip the lights on in one of the empty rooms and motion him in ahead of me. I take a seat at the head of the table, thinking that maybe it will give me a sense of being in charge. Silly to need that, but I’m happy to take any advantage I can. He settles in the chair next to mine and clasps his hands together on top of the table. “So what can I do for you, Jake?” I ask, focusing on some point beyond his shoulder. I may not love him anymore, but it’s still hard to look into the eyes of someone who hurt me so badly. A man I trusted with my secrets. A man I trusted to keep his damn dick in his pants. Shit, now I’m pissed again, and it feels good—no great.

He clears his throat loudly, and I wait for him to ask for water, but he doesn’t. He gets right to the point. “Lia told me what happened with Mercedes, and I wanted to say that I’m—”

“Mercedes? That’s your girlfriend’s name?” I begin laughing and can’t seem to stop. I fall against the back of the chair, fanning myself as I attempt to get it together. “Was Volkswagen already taken? How about Volvo? Too tame? Not classy enough for a girl like her?” Instead of being angry, Jake seems to be slinking lower into his seat as if embarrassed. Amazing; he cheated on me with a girl named after a fucking car. He doesn’t say a word as I have my slightly manic moment before wiping away the tears of amusement that had fallen down my cheeks. “Okay, um, sorry about that.” I flex my aching jaw and say, “Go ahead with what you were saying.”

“I’m sorry,” he blurts out, probably afraid I’ll interrupt him again before he can get it out. “It wasn’t like I could hide the fact that you trashed my car,” he adds almost defensively, and then he seems to crumble. He actually looks as if he may cry. This is not the Jake Ryan that I knew. A contrite man he was not. “I should never have told her about the—other thing.” He puts a hand over mine, squeezing it tightly. “I promise you, Rose. I never made fun of you to her. Regardless of what happened between us, I’d never do that. I loved you too much—hell, I still love you. I just couldn’t be what you needed.”

“What’s that?” I mock him. “Faithful? Yeah, that was evident with the whole screwing around thing. Us woman are so unrealistic in our expectations, aren’t we?” All right, that may have been a tad bitchy, even for me. But what does he expect? A pat on the head and a fucking cookie?

“Dammit, Rose, can you just stop for a minute and let me talk?” he bites out. “I know you think I’m a dickhead and you’re not wrong. But I’m trying here, okay?”

I want to slap him and stomp out of the room. My hand is itching to connect with his smoothly shaven cheek, but the pleading look in his eyes stops me. Jake’s always been an open book. That’s how I knew he was cheating on me. I see nothing but sincerity and regret as he stares at me. Maybe I need this as much as he does. We have a lot of history between us, and it’s always bothered me that he threw our relationship away and hurt me so badly. Rubbing the bridge of my nose, I say quietly, “I’m listening.”

“This is hard for me to admit,” he says while studying the table. “But I couldn’t handle the pressure of you cutting yourself. I was scared shitless that my actions would drive you to it. Then I moved on to being paranoid that you’d kill yourself over something I did or didn’t do. I didn’t know how to be what you needed.” He looks shamefaced. “When Mercedes pursued me, I was flattered but not interested. I wasn’t lying when I said that I love you. I always have, almost to the point of obsession. But it was so complicated—and she wasn’t. I didn’t have to worry about what I said or did around her because her balls are probably bigger than mine,” he jokes weakly.

The urge to feel sorry for him is there again. Then I remember how it felt when his girlfriend made fun of me in the bathroom, and the anger is back, surging through me until I’m ready to explode. “You had options, Jake,” I hiss. “Why not just be a man and break up with me? And you certainly could have made the choice NOT to tell Mercedes about my scars.” I sneer at him. “How could you do that? You damn well knew that I’d never told anyone about that. But you and your girlfriend laughed at me like I was some kind of hideous joke.” My voice echoes through the room, and probably down the hallway as well, but I’m too far gone to care.

“I never laughed at you!” He pounds a fist on the table. “I was literally crying in my fucking beer over you one night and I said more than I should have. She was acting the part of the concerned friend, and I told her how much I missed you. Then she asked why I slept with her if I still wanted you … and it just came out. Swear to God, though, we never joked about it. Actually, it wasn’t brought up again. She was lying about that.” He sounds almost hopeful when he says, “I’m breaking up with her today. I can’t be with someone like that. She isn’t who I thought she was—she’s not you.”

I need to defuse this situation now. Unless I’m wrong, Jake wants more than to apologize. I get to my feet and he does the same. I step back to keep distance between us. I don’t need his proclamation of love now. I needed it a long time ago. But not now. I need nothing from him now. “Thank you for coming to talk to me. I know it couldn’t have been easy.” I can give him that much. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to forgive him for everything that’s happened, but I do feel better knowing that he wasn’t tearing me down to others. That hurt me as bad or worse than the infidelity. I try not to think about how many people Mercedes has likely told about my situation. I’m slowly trying to accept that I can’t be responsible for the actions of others—only my own.

He bridges the distance and puts a hand on my arm. “Could I take you to dinner—to let you know how sorry I am? If you’ll let me know where you’re staying now, I can pick you up tonight. Did you move back in with your parents? I called there but kept getting their machine.”

“Jake, that’s not happening. I appreciate you taking the time to see me today, but I’m involved with someone else. Actually, I’m living with him.” As I’m not looking directly at Jake when I tell him, I can’t see his expression. But by the quick intake of air and lowering of the head, followed by his telltale stroke of the back of his neck, I can sense he wasn’t expecting that answer.

Taking me by surprise, he says, “You always deserved better than me. I hope you’ve found it now.” I’m still speechless as he drops a kiss on my cheek and leaves the room.

I feel as if a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. My past is slowly making way for my future, and the fear I’ve lived with for so long is losing its grip on me. I’m still in control. Accept the anxiety. Don’t try to fight it. I’m still in control. Joanna will be proud. Bring on the next bombshell. I’ve got this.

How I’ll regret even thinking that in the days to come because fate took it a little too literally.