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Ruckus (SEAL Team Alpha Book 1) by Zoe Dawson (5)

5

In a jumble of fear and regret, the dream nothing but dark shadows and even frightening meanings, she came suddenly awake. There was a hand over her mouth. Her instincts kicked in, and she tried to fight, but whoever had her only tightened the hold, a big body straddling hers. She gulped down panic and blind terror, striking the person was like hitting granite. Trapped in the remnants of the nightmare, the air heaved in and out of her lungs in tremendous hot, ragged gasps.

Then he spoke into her ear, his voice husky and soft. “It’s me, cupcake. Hang on. We have company.”

She stilled immediately, her heart pounding, the tentacles of fear leaving her cold and shaking. They were currently well concealed in the jungle, forgoing the comfort of the tent. Ruckus was a master at hiding himself and her. What had he called it? SERE? This would be the evading part just as he’d done with boosting her up into that tree. Boldly sitting there while the enemy moved right beneath them. It made her heart pound thinking about it.

His attention shifted from her to the direction of the water. Foliage was above her, the canopy thick and blocking out most of the moonlight, but the water illuminated the pale, now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t moon reflecting off the shimmering surface.

She could just make out his devastating features, his whole body on alert and ready for action. She had to wonder if he was always like this, even when he was home. The training of an elite operative ingrained into him.

She didn’t relax until he did. Removing his hand from her mouth. “Armed men. Not sure if it was FARC or CLP,” he whispered. “They looked like they were searching.”

“Great, we have more people after us.”

“If we’d stolen the boat…” He trailed off, and she suddenly realized that Ruckus was still straddling her.

“Right, and we didn’t kill CLP drug runners and throw their coke in the dirt. But, nothing stopping them from coming after their stolen boat, too.”

“I’ll concede that, babe,” he said softly.

“Oh, my God. Did you just agree with me? This must be a first.”

“I’m not sure that trend will continue,” he said wryly. Then he smiled and her world tilted. Dana had been in the company of many men, through many situations, but this one with Ruckus was the strangest. They were together by circumstance and necessity. Strangers really. Except, he’d put his life on the line many times in the past two days. She wasn’t sure he even liked her. But with each passing minute, she was getting a handle on him. He might act all tough and pushy, but there was something there, below the surface, like a shiny object beckoning to her. Along with that, there was pain, enough to shadow his eyes.

But what the hell did she know about warriors?

Not much. But this warrior. She wanted to know more.

“You okay?” he asked, the smile fading as he searched her eyes.

Her insides jumped. Keep everything inside, keep everything neutral was her mantra. Reporters were objective, even about their own feelings and hang-ups.

“Yes. I’m fine,” she responded, meeting his gaze.

“You were having a nightmare. I didn’t mean to scare you even more.”

“I eat panic for breakfast,” she said flippantly, but Ruckus’s eyes only sharpened.

“That’s a nice canned response, but processing everything that happened yesterday takes time.”

She blew out a breath. “I suspect you know something about that.”

His mouth skewed wryly again. “Yeah, a bit.” He supported himself on his elbows. “We should be quiet and not move until we’re sure they don’t come back this way.” She nodded and his eyes riveted to hers. “For the record, you are one tough little wildcat.”

“A wildcat cupcake, huh?”

He chuckled. “Yeah. Not so light and airy. Those sprinkles can be used as lethal weapons.”

“You saved me. I was just giving Escobar a piece of my mind with my fists.” She caressed his face, settling inexplicably on his mouth, that tantalizing mouth. She should really stop looking at it and him. Now. Right now.

She should feel uncomfortable, especially after yesterday and what had happened with Escobar, but she didn’t. All the danger wrapped around fleeing for her life seemed to settle in her gut only upping the tension. She just couldn’t get past the fact that he was so willing to be there for her, through anything. Risking his life to save hers, even with the odds so stacked against her.

His big body was intimately joined with hers, his chest pressed against her breasts. She looked up at him, the air between them tightened and heated. He was so close, and he smelled so warm and male. Suddenly Dana felt very fragile and very shaky inside. She closed her eyes, clenching her jaw against her own emotions.

Everything tingled in her from her skin to her mind to her fingertips. Her numbness had been safe without letting in emotions and now with Ruckus, nothing seemed safe.

And she knew that she could never go back to Jeff. That it was over between them. Had been over for some time. He had been part of her life that she’d numbed, and Ruckus made her feel much too alive to lie to herself anymore.

For so long she’d been getting by after her mom’s death, trying with all her might to live up to her mother’s expectations, fulfill her last wish. Keeping her objectivity in place had gotten her through each waking moment. Her life had been so full of movement and harsh environments. Condemnation and guilt. But now her world was filled with this man for the long haul. Because with the danger came her determination to beat the odds, get to Salazar and kick that bully’s ass. She was getting her memory cards back.

“What just happened there?” he asked, his voice dropping an octave, his blue eyes glittering in the eerie silvery light that broke through the canopy, casting his features in stark relief and making her melt inside like warm chocolate. His concern for her was evident.

“I’m not giving up. No matter what happens. I can’t.”

“Why?”

Suddenly she was close to tears, her throat tightened. She blinked several times to push back the sudden, overwhelming grief, the ache spreading until she ruthlessly pulled it back. “Because, I promised my mom I would do this for her. It’s the only thing that’s kept me going since she…died.”

His blue eyes softened even more. “You were close?” His voice was tentative as if he didn’t understand that closeness, or understood it too well. She wondered which it was.

“Very.” She felt as if every nerve in her body was stretched to the limit, the knot in her stomach sitting like a rock. “Dr. Meredith Sorenson. My dad called her Merry and she was full of life and so happy most of the time. She was strong, capable, and loved both of us with all that she had. She worked with Doctors Without Borders most of her career, with a brief break here and there to have and raise me. She was this amazing person, selfless, giving, inexhaustible. She cared so much. I miss her so much.” Her mother’s work had affected her deeply. Dana saw how it had twisted her up and made her even more desperate to ease that suffering. Dana’s objectivity was her armor. Without it she was just as exposed to the turmoil her mother endured up until the end.

“I’m sorry.” His response was genuine, in his voice and features. She trembled slightly as the heat from his body drifted over her skin. She caught a breath in her throat as he lifted a hand to push a lock of hair out of her right eye.

It wasn’t that he was being sweet and his response full of his condolences, it was that this hard-edged man could bend enough to give her some comfort. If she melted anymore, she would be nothing but liquid.

“I think we’re going to have to hoof it. With the river full of the CLP, it’s not going to be safe to travel by water.”

She sighed. “This is my fault.”

“It was a goat fuck and sometimes those can’t be helped. Best laid plans and all.”

“Goat fuck?”

“It’s military slang for something that has gone completely wrong and is unlikely to end positively. Others I will probably use are FUBAR: Fucked up Beyond All Recognition. Then there’s cluster fuck which is something along the lines of goat fuck, but including many more screwed up things. Also SNAFU—Situation Normal, All Fucked up.”

“You sure do have a lot of sayings when something goes wrong. Should I still have faith in the military?”

He chuckled. “We don’t complain when it happens. We adapt, but as SEALs we’re well aware that a plan only means, in theory, we know what we want to have happen. In reality? When the bullets start flying, that tends to distract us from any type of preconceived notion. It happens to any battle-hardened team. We have to address the immediate threat, then quickly, as much as possible, get back to the plan. There is only one guarantee. Someone will be shooting at us.”

“Oh, like you did when you found me, half naked in Salazar’s house. What did you think? I was his whore?”

“It crossed my mind once I could get it back on track.”

“So, even with the mess behind us, we are now back on the plan?”

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, but his voice was softer, and it sent shivers over her skin.

“Thank you by the way. I’m so grateful you were there.”

“I did what needed to be done. I told you, they didn’t worry me, and there was no way I was going to let that bastard put his hands on you ever again. He got what he deserved. He wasn’t taking you back as a hostage. No freaking way.” The anger in his voice made her heart turn over. Without thinking, she lifted her head and pressed a kiss to his scratchy cheek. The tension climbed a notch, radiating like a force field around them. His expression altered as if he’d just found something infinitely precious. Dana’s heart started stammering, and suddenly it was impossible to breathe. He stared at her for a moment, this hot, sexy man, then he brought his mouth into full contact with hers.

The kiss was slow, soft and so unbelievably gentle that it left her absolutely breathless, and her whole body so in tune with his. A sudden urgency sizzled through her, and she locked her arms around him.

* * *

Too many miles away, sitting on a rise, surveying the forest in a back and forth vigil, Kid Chaos listened unabashedly to everything Ruckus said to the beautiful Dana. His LT was putting the moves on her and that was turning him on.

Back at the stronghold, of course he hadn’t wanted to go downstairs and help Scarecrow. He’d wanted to stay upstairs and save the babe. Not that he would ever cheat. It was his one hard and fast rule. No cheating. It hurt like hell. He should know.

He rubbed at his breastbone at a place where a stick was poking him. That wasn’t emotion, he assured himself. He was long over it. No, that feeling was just a stick stuck in his craw.

He had been all about rescue, Boy Scout stuff and, well, he wasn’t fucking blind. She was a beautiful woman wrapped up in terry cloth and he was a red-blooded male. So, hell yes, he was going to look.

Looked like LT was taking orders from his dick. And that was one powerful admiral.

He heard a soft groan, a woman’s groan, and his imagination started filling in all sorts of pieces whether he wanted it to or not.

This was torture.

A long-distance voyeuristic, ménage à trois—except, fuck it, he was getting hard.

There was nothing but rapid breaths, hot breathing over the mic and he saw Cowboy lift his head and their eyes met. Kid grinned and Cowboy returned it. He mouthed. What the fuck? Kid blew him a kiss, and Cowboy gave him the finger. He shook his head and got up, probably to relieve himself.

The other guys were stirring and with the looks between them and their wide grins, they were aware of what was happening.

He hadn’t listened on purpose. Ruckus must have keyed his mic by accident. But in the dark before the dawn, Kid missed his current girlfriend Mia. She was all soft and sweet, the total opposite of his lean, badass self.

His appetites were just as powerful as his predilection to demand a healthy dose of adrenaline every day. There was nothing more intensifying than having a woman all over him, submitting to his control as he made sure she was screaming and begging for more with that breathless quality in her voice he couldn’t get enough of, especially sliding his aching dick into her, slick and ready for him.

Damn he missed Mia.

He knew he was a lot to take, but that was too damn bad if it was too much. He wasn’t apologetic about who he was. He played hard and fought even harder. Adrenaline junkie about covered it. He was most in his element when he was in a firefight, HALO free-falling, or hang-gliding off a cliff in Peru. It was all about challenging the elements, gravity, physics, death. Sniping was his specialty and, although he valued human life, taking an enemy’s was his job and he never hesitated when he had someone in his scope. The critical talent was his willingness to look a man in the eyes and headshot him without flinching. He was not just chaos personified, but a cold perfect zero as well, a term that meant, one shot, one kill. He’d been trained well by Uncle Sam and he used every damn thing he’d learned while in “his” service. It just happened he got the bonus of defending the United States. That and the honor of serving on the teams made him a dangerous SEAL. Just what the red, white and blue ordered.

Since LT keyed his mic all the guys could hear him, but it was clear they took it in stride and went back to sleep, snores all the way around. Well, except for him. He was the one on guard duty.

“Ruckus?” she said, her voice breathless and Kid wanted to groan out loud.

“Yeah?” LT wasn’t in any better shape. Kid had never heard that tone come over the radio.

“Is the danger past?”

“I think so.”

Not by a long-shot, Kid thought. He had Scarecrow’s satellite computer, and they were monitoring the area around Ruckus. When he spied all the red dots moving steadily toward them, he had to break radio silence. Damn, the boss was going to have his ass when he realized he’d been putting on a show for seven guys and Kid hadn’t said a word.

* * *

“Uh, LT?”

With his lips still on the cupcake’s soft and delectable mouth, the sound buzzing in his ears didn’t register. She brushed her lips over his, and he lost focus again, opening his mouth over hers, plunging deeply, taking her into him. Holy hell, she was eating him alive, her tongue thrusting between his lips and unhinging him in seconds. He was trapped, his dick going stone hard, his shoulders pulling tight as he tasted her. Savored her. The woman was one tasty morsel.

“Earth to LT.” Ruckus froze as Kid’s urgent tone broke through his sensual haze. He was furious with himself for his lack of control. But when he looked down into those dazed, stirred up honey brown eyes and the connection that had been sizzling between them coalesced into something more. That’s when it hit him, the loneliness that had been with him for as long as he could remember, even through the train wreck of his marriage. He had a bond with the men he fought with, socialized with them even when they weren’t on duty, but even those friendships weren’t a substitute for female companionship.

The more he looked into those eyes, the more alone he felt, her vibrancy, the life in her, he wanted that, craved it, a huge hollowness in the middle of his chest. She could fill it. But he dismissed that thought. His track record with women was so abysmal, he’d be a fool to even take the risk of getting hurt again.

“LT,” Kid’s voice intensified.

“What?” He went to key his mic and swore a blue streak in his head. It had been open. All this time. Damn.

“Yeah.”

He pushed his aroused, protesting body off hers and stood, her sultry eyes tracked him as he moved away from her. Lowering his voice, pinching the bridge of his nose between his fingers, he ground out, “Were you listening this whole time?”

“Yeah, you must have keyed your mic by mistake. I was getting bored as hell, and with all due respect, that was hot…sir.” He made kissing noises.

“Kid?” Ruckus growled.

“Yeah?” Kid said as if he didn’t have a care in the world.

“Remind me to kick your ass the next time I see you.” Ruckus said gruffly, his voice full of threat.

“Copy that, LT,” Kid said cheerily.

He waited impatiently, fuming. “I’m assuming you contacted me for a reason?” he barked.

“Yes, sir. If you’re quite done with the kissy face, I thought you’d want to know there’s a large group of tangos moving your way.”

Ruckus sighed, gritting his teeth. “Let me guess. From the North.”

“Yeah, you get the Cracker Jack prize. I’m afraid so and from the South on the river. If you stay at your present location, you’re going to get boxed in. They’re cutting off egress. You’re going to have to cross the river to avoid them. It’s clear on the other side.”

“Copy that,” he growled.

“Oh, and LT?”

“Yes, Kid,” he said it like he wanted to grind up the little bastard into hamburger.

“Next time, make sure your mic volume is turned up. I loved the entertainment.”

“Kid…”

“Hey? Is that asking too much?”

He was going to open some chaos on that kid’s ass. He didn’t even bother to answer, just closed communications. He walked over to Dana, his face grim. “We’ve got a whole lot of company, and you’re not going to like my plan, babe. Grab your pack, and let’s go.”

She groaned. “What is it?”

“We’re going swimming with the gators.”

“I don’t want to be on the menu,” she protested. But he grabbed her arm and led her down to the water’s edge. “That’s not the worst of it.” He looked at her.

Her brows rose and she rubbed at her forehead. “There’s more good news?”

“Yeah, we’re going to have to cross back.”

“You’re just full of glad tidings. I so love camping with you.”

He flashed her a grin. “Grab on to my vest and don’t let go for anything. Take a breath.”

She took her breath and he took his.

Before he dragged her under with him, she gave him a sidelong glance. “Is this what you call a cluster?”

“The fuckiest of all clusters.”