He pushed the speedometer to seventy and kept his dark gaze trained straight ahead.
I could partially see Simon in the rearview mirror trying to keep his head up, being brutalized by the asphalt.
“Who is he?” he asked me, speaking just loud enough I could hear him over Simon’s screams.
“I don’t know, but you’re going to make a mess,” I replied flippantly, twirling a strand of hair around my finger.
“You fuck him?”
“What?” I started to laugh. “Are you for real?”
“You think this is funny?”
“You’re jealous because I may or may not have fucked that guy, but I’ve fucked lots of guys. I’ve fucked my dad, my uncles, and I was kinda-sorta fucked by my baby brother. I’m a real bonafide whore.”
“Cali,” Arlen choked from behind me.
“Don’t feel pity for me. I’ve had as many cocks between my legs as I’ve had in my mouth. Oh, and a few women got the VIP treatment too, so no one was left out.” I forced another laugh and looked down at my lap, clasping my hands together.
Romero sharply swerved after a minute, sending Simon’s body to the far right. The chain around his ankles snagged as his head hit a culvert and detached from his body.
Quietness settled over the jeep.
I had no desire to see what was left of Simon’s body. As soon as we were back at the warehouse, I was out of the Jeep and darting inside.
“Don’t ever fuckin call yourself a whore again.”
I paused on my way to the kitchenette.
“And here I was, thinking I was your special whore now.” With a sigh, I resumed walking, adding a little skip.
He came up behind me and spun me around. “What the fuck did I just say?”
“I think I forgot already. Will you repeat it?”
Slipping out from between him and the counter, I put space between us by circling to the opposite end of the table.
He looked at me for a minute before scrubbing a hand over his face.
“I’m waiting.” He crossed his arms and gave me a leveled stare.
“Why did you kill that little boy? He was just a kid, Rome.”
“So she does have some morality left in there.” He sneered at me. “That wasn’t a kid; that was an animal. He would’ve eaten your fuckin face off in your sleep. I’ve seen dozens of kids just like em.”
“You’re an animal, too! You’re a…”
“Savage. I know. I make no excuses, and I have no regrets. This is who I choose to be and I don’t care if you don’t like it. You’re either with me or against me.”
“And what if I’m against?” I asked quietly.
I wasn’t, of course. I was with him through and through, but I could already picture Tito in my rearview mirror.
If I knew with complete certainty that there would be no issue between them, I would put it all out in the open. My gut told me that wasn’t the case, though.
“If you’re not with me, then I guess you would be a whore.” He spat the word at me like it tasted vile in his mouth. “Get your ass upstairs, the fuck out of my sight.” He walked away, back towards the front of the warehouse.
“Shit,” Cobra muttered, taking off after him, leaving the clueless blonde beside Arlen.
Sucking in a breath, I stared after him, looking down when I felt a tug on my wrist. “Come on,” Grimm coaxed.
I let him lead me up the stairs, surprised when he followed me into Romero’s room.
“I’m not looking for a pity fuck,” I clarified right off the bat.
“I don’t want to…I would never.” He looked mortified at the very idea of it, the most emotion I’d ever seen from him written all over his face. He shook his head, stroking his beard.
“I would never fuck you because you belong to my best friend, and he would do things to me not even I could imagine—and I’m real imaginative, just for some clarification. I would never fuck you because nothing you said in that car was true.
“You’re not a whore, Cali. You were just a little girl and no one was there to protect you. I promise you there are a lot of people in this world who regret that.”
The sincerity laced in his words knocked against my stone exterior. Dropping my gaze to the floor, I sat on the edge of the bed and let out a dry laugh.
“That’s real sweet of you, Grimmy, but no one in this world has ever apologized for what happened to me, and I no longer expect them to. I just want to find a place where I fit in.”
“You already did. I don’t have any issues with you staying, as long as you’re in it for the long haul. We haven’t got to the good parts yet.”
Toying with my hair, I gave him a small smile. “Thank you.”
His regular inexpressive face was back but I could swear by it the man almost smiled. He nodded and headed for the door, pausing after he pulled it open.
“You’re crazy and a pain in the ass. He’s insane and always fuckin moody but the connection is undeniable. Everyone sees it. You fit—you’re a fucked up pair of star-crossed lovers.”
With that, he walked out of the room and shut the door, leaving me to wallow in my thoughts.
Falling back onto the bed, I looked up at the ceiling, blowing out my cheeks.
Me and Rome.
Rome and I.
We were unhealthy, dysfunctional, toxic.
I could flip through both an encyclopedia and a dictionary and still wouldn’t find words to describe us.
Beyond the excitement, beyond the lust, he gave my aching heart a place of comfort that I’d never known. This thing between us was certain death, all smoke and darkened skies with no sign of a sunrise, but I wanted what I wanted, and that was him.
Her moans grew louder and louder, and the headboard hit the wall in a steady rhythm, echoing down the darkened hall.
I glanced over at Arlen and snickered.
“It ain’t funny.”
“Either the sound of fucking makes you irritated, or who’s doing the fucking has you irritated. I’ll take a wild guess and say it’s the latter.”
“I don’t need you to play couch therapist, and Cobra fucked her too so that trumps your theory.”
She tossed the blanket off and sat up, crossing her inked arms over her chest.
“What’s your story?” I already knew it. I just wanted to hear her answer.
“Don’t got one. I was tryna find my sister and got taken by them cannibals.”
Huh, that was almost true.
“Shouldn’t you be kissin ass right now?”
“I could be bending you over––”
“You got bout three seconds to fix that sentence. Don’t give me any reasons to take Cali your balls in the form of a necklace.”
I laughed for what felt like the first time all day.
“I was fucking with you, baby girl. I don’t juggle women.”
I was actually making sure her loyalty was in the right place. If it wasn’t, I was going to kill her quick and tell Cali she ran off.
Fucking Cali.
I needed a drink, and I didn’t drink.
This was the part about giving shit that bit me in the ass. I had a track replaying in my goddamn head of every person she named, and I was gunning for their asses.
My beautiful girl thought she was a whore. Those motherfuckers created thorns on a flower that never had any.
I could see the real her, feel her trapped inside a dark fucking sinkhole that they shoved her in.
Cali knew exactly who she was. She was ashamed of it. She lashed out the only way she knew how because of it. Her head was irreparable because of it. Why had no one told her she was fucking perfect?
I’d never seen damaged look so good. Never seen bruised knees look so pretty. She was so perfect I didn’t deserve her. A better man would’ve let her go but that wasn’t me.
Arlen’s drowsy voice pulled me out of my head.
“Can I ask you something?”
“You just did.”
She gave me a flat look.
“Shoot your shot.”
She got so damn quiet I thought she’d fallen back asleep. Her back was to me and the blanket was almost over her head. Her question almost through me off guard—almost.
I wondered if she asked because she wanted to know or asked because she wanted a man nicknamed after the personification of death.
“What kind of evil are you?”
“The kind no one can save you from. If there’s a god, not even he could help you.”
“Okay, you can go fix your screw up now.” She adjusted her head on the arm of the couch and sighed. “You two, you’re like fire and gasoline. You’re perfect for one another so quit being a dumbass and go strike the match.”
I smirked at her back. If my sister were still alive, I could see her being a lot like Arlen. Standing up, I gave her the only advice I could offer.
“If you’re going to run, run now, because after tomorrow, everything’s going to change.”