I’ve made a decision. I obviously can’t please Ken. I can’t be what he wants me to be. The trust he had in me was shattered when the Germans walked in, and it won’t ever come back. I think we both know that. He just doesn’t want to admit it, because he’s a fighter and he’s honorable. So I’m going to relieve him of the burden. I’m going to get out of here. Tonight.

The security in this place is pretty good, but it’s not really intended to hold people. It’s intended to train them. And once Ken goes home every night, the staff switch out. The ones who replace him are much more relaxed. Nicer, really. They feel a bit sorry for me for being locked down all the time and sometimes they give me treats, like access to the rec room. I’ve never been so thrilled to be able to watch shitty tv than I have been here.

I’m going to be taking advantage of their kindness, which is shitty, but it’s for the greater good. Everybody will be better off without me.

My previous handlers, the ones I didn’t really even know were handlers, the men and women who were always around me in my teenage years, did teach me a trick or two. Like how to fool the kinds of scanners they use here. Fingerprints are unique to people, true, but people also leave them fucking everywhere they go. If you know what you’re doing, you can make an impression of almost anybody’s prints. I’ve taken the liberty of doing that for a few people, even Ken. Anyone who touches anything inside my room is a candidate for the technique.

I leave my room around midnight. It wasn’t locked because I slipped a piece of plastic into the mechanism which allows the bolt to slide a little ways, but not all the way. If someone isn’t paying attention, it looks like the cell is locked.

There aren’t any patrols on, because nobody is supposed to be out until morning. I walk out what is basically the front door and into the parking lot. There’s a car there. It’s always there, some silver thing. It opens with a thin strip of metal pushed down the inside of the window, and the engine starts when I pull and strip the wires under the steering wheel. This is almost too easy.

The last obstacle is the main gate. But that’s actually the simplest obstacle of all, because this car never gets stopped. I don’t know who it belongs to, but this car has special privileges here. Whoever is monitoring the gate doesn’t even look at me. The gates just open.

I’m free.

A grin spreads over my face. It really was too fucking easy, but then again, that has been my experience of life a lot of the time. Sometimes, the biggest obstacle to a thing is just daring to do it. I dared do this. And now I’m out. On the road.

I press my foot down on the accelerator and feel the thrill of freedom. Pure joy courses through my veins. I know I’m not necessarily going to get away with this, but right now it doesn’t matter. The walls are gone. The world is wide open.

The smart move would be to head inland. Find a rural state. Hang out there long enough to get hold of a passport and then jet off to a foreign country where the quality of life is good. Australia, maybe. New Zealand. Somewhere nice and far.

I could head to Hawaii, or Indonesia. I could go on perpetual Safari in deep Africa.

I could go anywhere. But there’s really only one place I want to go: home.

It’s past two in the morning when I slip open my daddy’s window. Tom never locks it. He likes it to be open just a little to let the fresh air in.

He stirs as I slip through the gap, but before he can panic and yell, I flick the bedside light on and whisper to him.

“Don’t worry. It’s just me!”

The sleep falls from his handsome face instantly. It’s been weeks since I saw him and I almost forgot how fucking handsome he is. His hair is messy from sleep. He has a five o’clock shadow which is graying just a little. He looks perfect. Shocked, but perfect.

Tom’s eyes widen as he gets up and drags me into a big bear hug. I breathe his scent deep and snuggle into his arms as he holds me so damn tight. I have needed a hug for a long time. I missed him so much. I wish he could come with me, but I know he can’t. I’ve got maybe a few minutes with him, and I just want to be held.

“What are you doing here, little girl?”

“Shhh,” I put my finger to his lips. “I just wanted to say goodbye.”

“Goodbye?”

“I’m leaving.”

“Leaving where?”

“The state, the country, I don’t know,” I shrug. “I’m just leaving. But I wanted to say bye first.”

Tom’s arms tighten around me.

“You know Ken is in the next room, right?”

“Yeah. And I know that in about two minutes, he’s going to get a call saying I’ve escaped. He’s going to leave here and rush to the facility. When he does, I want to take your car. There’s another one parked around the corner. I don’t want to steal it. I want you to give it back to them when I’m gone.”

Tom shakes his head.

“Little girl, I am not helping you run away.”

I expected this. I need to appeal to his softer side. “Do you know what they’re doing to me there? They keep me in a cell. And then Ken comes and makes me do the most ridiculous physical activities that aren’t even for any reason. He just wants to hurt me.”

“That is not true,” Tom says. “That is absolutely not true.”

“He wouldn’t let me see you. He kept me locked up in a cell and he humiliated me. He made me run naked.”

“And?”

I look up at Tom, shocked. “And that’s horrible!”

“It sounds pretty standard for special forces. Actually, it sounds mild,” Tom says. “When Ken went through, they made him dip his balls in a freezing lake for as long as he could take it. And then they did a whole lot of other stuff that made that seem like a joke.”

My jaw drops. “You want them to freeze my balls?”

“You don’t have balls, little girl,” he says gently. “But I know what you’re going through. And I know it’s tough. But he’s doing what he needs to. And you…” Tom lets out a small chuckle as the enormity of the situation hits him. “Oh my god did you just get yourself into trouble.”

“I’m leaving,” I repeat. “I’m going away.”

“You absolutely are not,” Tom says firmly. “You’re going to stay right here and we’re going to wake Ken up and tell him. He might still be able to fix this.”

“No!” I hiss in a whisper. “He’s not the same man he was before. He’s mean. He doesn’t love me. He doesn’t even like me.”

Tom runs his hand over my hair, stroking it back from my forehead gently. “He’s trying to get you where you need to be, baby. He can’t be your lover right now.”

“So I don’t get love until I do what they want?” My lower lip trembles as Tom snugs me tight against his body. I need this so badly. I need him. I have craved this, and I have been denied it. Right now, I don’t even care that half the reason he’s holding me so tight is so I don’t escape again. I close my eyes and I try to hold on to this moment. I will time to stop so that I can just stay here forever, held by a man who has never shown me anything other than complete and total care.

“You’re loved, Mary,” Tom murmurs. “By both of us. But you have to be a good girl.”

“I have to be a good little prisoner, you mean,” I snort. “I won’t be. I can’t be.”

“What the hell!?”

The exclamation bursts out from behind us. I turn to see Ken standing in the doorway.

The look on his face is priceless. He’s so shocked. This moment is utterly absurd in so many ways. I escaped clean and fucked it up by coming here. And now Ken’s woken up from a deep sleep to find me in his brother’s room. This is ridiculous. We are three utterly fucked people. All we want is to be together, but we can’t because of a past none of us had any control over, but now they have to punish me for it. And themselves. How fucking stupid.

I can’t help but laugh.

That might be the single biggest mistake of my life.

Ken crosses the room, grabs me by the wrist, and yanks me out of Tom’s arms.

“What the hell are you doing here?” He thunders the question down at me. He’s wearing nothing but boxer shorts. It’s been a while since I saw his body like this, the muscular planes, the breadth of his shoulders. He’s so fucking hot. Especially when he’s angry. And right now, he’s furious.

“I came to see Tom.”

“She’s running away,” Tom says, dropping me right in it.

“Mary!” Ken says my name like a curse. “Mary what the hell? How did you…”

I am not telling him how I did what I did. That’s for me to know and him to review on the security footage.

“Do you have any idea what would have happened if you’d actually gotten away? You could have been declared an enemy of the state!” He snarls the words at me, his fists curled in my shirt.

“Who cares?” I damn near yell back at him.

“I care, Mary. I fucking goddamn well fucking care,” he swears. “Goddamn, girl.”

I’ve never seen him this close to losing control. Ever. Anger is coming off him in waves to the point I am actually frightened. He has never harmed me before, but he might really hurt me this time.

The ground starts to slide away beneath my feet as Ken drags me out of the house and puts me into his car, picking me up and more or less tossing me inside it. “Don’t fucking move,” he snarls in at me, his eyes narrowed, his nostrils flared.

The car door slams shut, and I am left alone.