CHAPTER ELEVEN
SUBTLE NOTES OF her vanilla caramel coffee scent stir me awake. A small hope blooming in my chest that when I open my eyes, she will be there lying next to me. But when I open them her side of the bed is cold. With a reluctant sigh, I force myself to get up. I should try to eat at least something small this morning.
It’s been six months. We aren’t any closer to finding her. Even though Mark hasn’t said anything, he is starting to lose hope. I can see it in his eyes. He holds fast to his word and works tirelessly anyway.
I catch a glimpse of the city below layered in a fresh blanket of snow. A warm memory of the first time Autumn was here for the snow, tugs at the corners of my mind.
She had never looked more adorable as she bounced on her toes and begged me to go outside with her. Chuckling, I kissed her softly and obliged. As we walked out, the cold wind whipped through her hair. Her sparkling eyes and rosie cheeks fill my heart with joy. I love seeing her happy. She hooked her arm with mine as we walked through New York’s own winter wonderland, Central Park. I remember being on a business call for too long before she tirelessly attempted to get my attention. When I ignored everything, she hurled a giant snowball, smashing it right at the back of my head. Cutting my call off, I shot her a glare then pounced, landing us in a mound of snow banks. I can still remember her laughing and begging for me to stop tickling her. My heart tightens at the memory.
Shaking my mind free of the memory, I leave the guest room. I haven’t been able to sleep in our room. If it weren’t for Martha, the housekeeper, it would be collecting dust. I’ve been debating whether or not to move my things into the guest room. That way I can ignore the constant pain in my chest.
“Good morning, sir.” Mark says a little too brightly as I emerge an hour later, freshly showered and dressed. “I had Martha make you something to eat this morning.”
I resist rolling my eyes. I hate when he does that. “I hope it’s nothing big.”
“No, sir. Just some croissants, and eggs if you would like. You need to eat.”
Since when are my eating habits any of his concern? If he’s going to be this controlling, I’d better keep the midnight running to myself. It’s the only way to clear my head of the nightmares that plague me and I won’t have him interfering.
Not in the mood to argue, I feign a smile and say, “Thank you.”
Martha sets a small plate down on the counter containing a steaming croissant and a small pile of eggs. My stomach churns at the rich smell invading my nostrils. Ignoring the eggs, I grab the pastry and a napkin, turning to Mark.
“I’m not going into the office today.” I’m met with Mark’s infamous scowl and dark eyes. “There is something I have been meaning to do, and I think today is the perfect day to do it.” I need to get out of this blasted penthouse, away from the office, and out into the cold air. Perhaps walking around will stir up more memories. Help me feel closer to her.
Mark raises a brow, his expression slightly agitated. “What is that, sir?”
“I need to pick up my tux, and Autumn’s wedding dress.”
I’m waiting. The hint of a smile curving my lips as I watch Mark and Martha exchange worried looks. A few minutes go by before either one of them look back at me.
“Sir, I know you’re hurting.” Martha says a twinge of sadness in her voice. “But it’s been six months. Shouldn’t you start thinking about… moving on?”
“No.” Turning my gaze to Mark, I smile, “Let’s go.”
He exchanges one more glance with Martha then follows me out grabbing my peacoat on the way to the elevator.
“Sir—”
“I already know you are losing hope, Mark. I can see it in your eyes.” I interrupt, slipping on my coat. “You haven’t given up though, right?”
I know he won’t go back on his word. But I need to hear him say it. He studies me a long moment before he responds, “No, sir. I promised I wouldn’t.”
I nod, satisfied and finish off the croissant. I feel both elated and devastated simultaneously. The thought of warm memories surfacing today is exciting. Anything to drive the terrors away, but knowing that I may never see her in her dress. Never slip her wedding bands on, or feel her velvet skin against mine again, is almost unbearable.
Mark looks at me when the elevator comes to a stop in the garage and I don’t step out. “Let’s walk.”
“Walk? It’s freezing out! And there’s several inches of snow.”
Shooting him an icy glare, I press the button for the lobby. “You do not have to come Mark.”
He shakes his head, crossing his arms over his broad chest. “It would be unwise to leave you alone.”
“There hasn’t been a threat since the first day back at the office.” I say waving him off.
“That may be, but there is no telling when someone will strike. I will not take the risk.”
“Well, I want to walk.”
I quickly make my way across the lobby’s marble floor avoiding eye contact with the camped out reports. I manage to slip out without being noticed, and am grateful that there isn’t anyone waiting outside either. Cupping my hands I blow puffs of warm breath over my cold fingers, then rub my hands together.
As I walk toward the tux shop, I’m eerily aware that someone besides Mark is following me. I could just be paranoid, but a sinking feeling in my gut says otherwise. I glance to my right and catch Mark’s alert gaze. He knows too.
I try to ignore the fact that they're closing the gap slowly behind us and focus on the road. We come up along side a small cafe and Mark grabs my arm pulling me inside. The person following us must have looked away just before I was pulled in because he stops at the store front and looks around. Cursing, he pulls out his phone. Whoever he’s talking to is giving him an ear-full because his face falls, and fear fills his eyes.
Mark grabs us a table near the tinted windows. After a moment of arguing that I’m fine in this crowded cafe, he gets in line to order us a drink. Not a second later, a black sedan speeds up and skids to a stop next to the man still standing outside the cafe. A man’s face appears, but is hidden behind a scarf. All I see is a head of sandy blond hair, and light brown eyes. If looks could kill, the man on the sidewalk would be ash right about now. After a moment of muffled yelling, the man gets in the car, and I watch them skid and speed away.
“Did you see the boy following us?” Mark asks setting a latte on the table and takes a seat next to me.
“Not really. His face was hidden under his hood. I could just barely make out his expression, but no details.” I tell him before taking a sip from my cup. I hum in appreciation as the velvet vanilla foam coats my tongue, followed by the warming liquid sliding effortlessly down my throat.
A woman laughing draws my attention. She is sitting with her boyfriend in the corner of the cafe, talking, and enjoying each others company. It wasn’t long ago that she and I were in a cafe similar to this one. We had been out wedding shopping and stopped in for a bite to eat and to get out of the cold. It was a perfect afternoon. I remember how the amber shades of autumn made her green eyes so vivid.
“Where is he now?”
“Where is who?” I ask forcing my gaze away from the giggling couple.
“The boy who was following us!” Mark snaps quietly.
“Oh, I don’t know. A car showed up a moment after you left. He got in and they took off down the street.” I shrug, enjoying my coffee more than worrying about my safety.
A growl rumbles low in Mark’s throat jerking me fully into the present. “What did the car look like? Did you see anyone else?”
I describe the black sedan the best I can. I couldn’t get the license plate before it took off speeding down the road, and it irritates the shit out of Mark. I tell him of the man hiding behind the scarf, as well as the heated conversation they had before taking off. I didn’t have to hear what was being said to know he was getting his ass chewed for not paying closer attention to where we went. “I didn’t recognize either one from the little detail I saw.” Though the one in the car reminded me a little of Luke. Not having enough detail to give Mark, I leave out that little detail.
“Sir, I need you to be more careful. When you notice something out of the ordinary I need you to pay attention.” I nod but stay silent. He pinches the bridge of his nose then downs the rest of his coffee. “I’m having the car come get us. If you insist on going out then we are driving so I can keep you safer.”
“I want to walk.”
“I don’t care. It won’t bring you closer to her. It won’t bring her back.” He bites out. Each word like a swift kick in the chest knocking the wind from my lungs. He takes a long inhale. “I’m sorry, Kage. It’s just how it is. I know why you wanted to walk today. I don’t want to dampen your high spirits either. My sole purpose is to keep you safe.”
“Mark, this is the first incident in six months.”
“No, sir. It isn’t.” My eyes dart to his. “We didn’t want to worry you, but you have received several more letters.”
“Any of them a true concern? Do they know about Wolf?”
“Any letter you receive is a concern. However, so far none of these are a threat on your life. Even today, I believe they are just watching you. The boy messed up and got to close. As far as Wolf goes. He keeps a really low profile. No one in the department knows he’s even working on this. I’m not worried about him.”
“I’ll be more observant.”
“I know you have been distracted. May I suggest until we need anything you focus on work? Use this energy you have to push your business further. You would be surprised the connections and opportunities available as you grow.”
My head drops and I feel my eyes become too heavy to keep open. “I can’t stop thinking about that night. It plagues my dreams. I failed Mark. I should have never left her side.”
Mark places his hand on my shoulder. “No one expects you to forget. I don’t even want you to stop thinking of her. Wolf and I promised to find her regardless of what state she may be in. But you can’t blame yourself for what happened at the house or the hospital. I know she wouldn’t.”
His words of comfort should make me feel better. Should push back the darkness rising in my chest. But they don’t.
“The car will be here in a moment.” He continues. “Are we still going?”
“Yes.”
I stand and place our dishes on the counter near the barista, who stumbles before catching herself.
Mark and I step out of the café just as the car arrives. Dwayne, steps out and hands the keys to Mark before opening my door. Dwayne is a good guy. Fairly new to the team so I don’t know much about him. Mark assures me that he is an excellent asset to the team.
Mark drives us to the shop, primarily in silence. Every so often, he speaks in hushes words to Dwayne, he only responds with a nod, and more information if needed. It takes longer to get to the shop than normal due to the snow and heavy traffic. If we would have continued walking, we would have been there already. By the time he pulls up, I nearly bolt out of the car, ignoring the grumble he gives Dwayne to follow me.
“Awe! So nice to see you again.” A leggy, blue-eyed brunette says as I walk into the shop. “Did you decide on what you and your lovely fiancée wanted to do?”
I want to tell her no. That this will now be a surprise for when I find her, and hopefully she remembers me. But I flash her a smile, “Yes. The Armani black suit, and the fitted lace dress she loved the most.”
The woman, who’s name escapes me, claps her hands together grinning wide. “Perfect! I thought you might, so I went ahead and had them ordered the day you left, at no charge to you. We want our clients to have what they want and I figured she would want to try a dress on in her size. Is she here?” She starts peering around the store then toward the door.
“I’m afraid she isn’t. But I’m sure the size is fine. Can we get it altered if it’s either too small or too big?”
“Because it’s lace, we can’t alter it bigger, but we can do smaller if needed.” She says in an apologetic sweet tone.
“That’s fine.” I hand her my black Amex card paying no attention to the sudden heat covering her cheeks. I highly doubt Autumn will be gaining any weight. I pray that she doesn’t lose any due to her not being taken care of.
Dwayne appears just as the cashier hands me back my card, then walks around the counter to hand me my purchases. However, Dwayne takes them before I have a chance. A wide charming grin pulls the corner of his lips up. The brunette blushes and covers her mouth with a delicate hand.
“I’m Christina.”
“Dwayne, Miss.”
“Time to go.” I interject not wanting to stick around for their flirting. As I walk toward the door, I hear them exchange numbers followed by quickened steps in my direction. “Next time, refrain from flirting on the job.”
“Yes, sir. It won’t happen again.”
Thirty minutes later, we finally arrive back home. I head to the master the moment the elevator opens to the foyer. I hang up my suit and her dress in the back of the closet. A small sense of accomplishment glistens within the darkness taking over me. Stopping by my night stand, I pull a small black velvet box out of the top drawer. Popping it open I watch the diamonds from her engagement ring and wedding bands twinkle like her eyes in the glow of the city. Pocketing the box, I leave the room, and head to my office to continue my relentless research.