CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
SCOTT
Of all the days she could do this, she had to do it this week?
It was NASCAR week—the week I was going to be competing for first place in Daytona 500, and one of the most important weeks of my life. I was supposed to be relaxed and prepared, practicing every day and resting on the day before the race, as was my routine for the last few years.
But here I was, arguing with Julie and getting more baffled by the second.
It had started simple enough, with the brown and white rice argument all over again and me trying to humor her. But before I knew it, she was walking out of the living room and had locked herself in her room, and I’d dismissed it as yet another one of her mood swings. But she came out an hour later with her eyes red from her tears.
And she was already dragging something out of the bedroom with her.
I stared at the luggage she had beside her once again, trying to comprehend what she was trying to say.
“You need some time alone?” I echoed her words from earlier, unable to believe what I was hearing.
Julie nodded her head. She was wearing a yellow dress that looked so damn lovely on her that the sight pretty much made me ache in places that shouldn’t ache. But her actions had me frozen in place. There was no twinkle in her eye to indicate that she was humoring me, nor was there a smile on her lips. I took a step forward, and she seemed to brace herself for it.
“I need to get away from this life. From you,” she said. “I just…I’m tired. I want some time alone.” Her voice was perfectly calm, like what she was saying was normal and she wasn’t affected by the words at all. But I was affected—more affected than I would have liked to admit.
And her calmness triggered something in me.
Immediately, my bafflement disappeared as her resolute expression didn’t change. I felt anger trickling in.
“What the hell did I do wrong?”
She flinched at my words, despite my tone not rising. I immediately regretted it and took one step forward, intending to apologize.
But Julie was shaking her head. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I just think this has run its course,” she said quietly. “And we’re better off without any distractions during your competition. Don’t you think so?”
No. I want you there.
But pride had taken hold and choked me until my anger increased. I ended up nodding my head, the words coming out of my mouth sounding harsh even to me.
“Fine. We’ll do it your way. While we’re at it, I also don’t want you in my crew for now. We’re better off without the distraction. Don’t you think so?”
It was bait more than anything and I expected her to bite. But again, Julie was as calm as ever as she nodded her head and wholeheartedly agreed.
And I decided to just not give a damn.
*****
I spent that night drinking with Jay, who was trying to keep me from drinking too much as the race was the day after tomorrow. We bitched about whatever we could bitch about, though I could tell his heart was not in it. He looked preoccupied, though he was doing his best to act as normal as possible.
I tilted my head and downed my nth glass, studying him.
“Did you break it off with that chick you were dating or something?”
Jay downed his own glass. “Or something.”
“What happened?”
“That woman I’m dating…was dating. Turns out she’s married.”
I winced. Jay and I might have been single and willing to sleep with whoever struck our fancy, but he was against the married ones as much as I was.
“They certainly know how to cuckold, don’t they?” I said before I could stop myself.
Jay eyed me quietly. “What did Julie do to you?”
“Jules,” I immediately corrected. Then I cursed at my own correction and downed another glass. “Nothing. She just doesn’t want to live together anymore.”
“What did you do to her?”
“Nothing,” I scowled. “What do you take me for?”
Jay shrugged. “You’re my friend, but you can be a jerk sometimes.”
“I’ve been a perfect gentleman to her.” Well, except when we were screwing each other’s brains out, and I was making her scream for more incoherently. I found myself getting hard at the thought, and it warred with the anger and hurt still swirling inside me. “It was her who left.”
“Did she tell you why?”
I nodded. “Something about needing to get away from me.”
My mind went over the conversation we had, just like it did every day as I tried to analyze and re-analyze the words we said to each other. It cemented the fact that I didn’t do anything wrong, which made me come to one conclusion on why she really left.
Julie had had enough. She no longer wanted anything to do with me, and this was her only way of saying it—by cutting off the connection, just like that. Maybe divorce papers would follow.
Maybe I should stop damn caring.
I took another swig of my drink. Then I stood up and took another bottle out of Jay’s liquor collection, ignoring his raised brow.
I was going to drink the night into oblivion and forget about her completely. Then I was going to compete in that goddamn race like there was no tomorrow.
*****
“Think we’ll win today?”
Henry’s calm voice soothed me enough to check out the weather and contemplate over it. The race was in fifteen minutes, and everything was prepared. I was at my best, too, having already worked off the hangover I’d had.
In short, I was in the best physical condition to win this thing.
“Scott?”
I looked Henry in the eye and tried to smile. It didn’t come off the way I wanted it to, so I tried once more. “We’re going to win this thing, Indy.”
Then I sauntered off to where my car was, my heart not as in it as my brain.