“Put on your seatbelt, sweet Ava,” Mrs. Carlson said, slipping into the driver’s seat. Ava just sat there with a confused look on her face. “Hey, hasn’t Daddy taught you how to put on your seatbelt?”

“Nu-uh,” she said, shaking her head in protest. Mrs. Carlson let out a frustrated sigh. “He does it for me everytime, he says it’s safer that way.”

“Well, you’re a spoiled little girl, I’ll tell you that.”

Ava frowned and folded her arms across her chest. She pouted disapprovingly, as if to say, I want my daddy. Mrs. Carlson was a stubborn woman; she raised Kade to be independent, or at least she tried to. Ava wiggled around in her seat, threw a tantrum, kicked at the air as her grandma tried to put her seatbelt on for her. Mrs. Carlson clenched her jaw, just like her son did when he was frustrated, and then brushed her fingers through the little girl’s hair.

“Hey, it’s going to be okay,” she whispered gently. “Just a few more hours and Daddy will come pick you up.”

“Do I have to go back there tomorrow?” she asked, her eyes swelling up with a glassy layer of tears.

“Well, yes, but we don’t have to think about that now,” Mrs. Carlson said before driving off. She caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror, scoffing at her disheveled hair and heavy-hooded eyes. Her teeth were jagged and all of her happiness had manifested itself into laugh lines; deep down she had hoped for a more beautiful manifestation, but for now, she settled for this. Despite her hardships she was a happy woman, a strong woman, one that found peace in all her decisions. And she hoped her son would do the same.

At age sixty-three she still went drinking with her friends, took midnight drives, and danced at sports bars. But she also biked on cold mornings and drank coconut milk out of a carton. Kade thought she was irrational or even insane, but she begged to differ, claiming that her irrational nature made her happy.

As she drove down the winding road she admired Livingston just like she did everyday. The road stretched onward, hugging the land, taking each turn in easy stride. It was a grey that has welcomed many suns, become silvery as it soaked in the rays. Mrs. Carlson let her eyes run over each hue, seeing imperfections for the first time, yet feeling that as details created by an artistic hand, they rendered it all the more beautiful.

“Why, won’t you look at that!” she said, turning to Ava. The sun had risen over the horizon, hanging majestically over everything. For the first time since Ava came here, there was a glimmer in her eyes. She stared out the window, and when Mrs. Carlson rolled it down for her, she closed her eyes and let the breeze come over her face. She smiled at the mountains, and had probably forgotten all about her troubles, at least for now. It wasn’t long before Mrs. Carlson pulled over, parked her car, and turned to her granddaughter again.

“So, you ready?”

Ava raised her eyes to her, and then nodded solemnly.

“Alright then, great.” The two of them walked side by side, climbed up the stairs to the school and then headed for Ava’s classroom. “Well, would you look at that,” Mrs. Carlson said, eyeing the decorative halls. She went up the last flight of stairs slowly, stopping every once in a while to catch her breath while Ava skipped up the last few steps. “Is that your teacher?” she asked, smiling at Bria, who smiled back timidly. “Sorry we’re late, it’s been a busy morning.”

“Oh, that’s okay. It’s still the first day,” Bria said, her eyes fixated on Ava. “Well, what’s your name?”

Ava turned around and buried her face in her grandmother’s legs. “Her name is Ava,” Mrs. Carlson said. “Sorry, she’s a little shy around strangers.”

Bria froze, then her eyes went hovering around everywhere, jumping from wall to wall until she noticed that Mrs. Carlson had been staring at her. “It’s okay, we’ll make sure she’s comfortable,” she said, smiling weakly. “You’re such a pretty girl, Ava.”

“I know, she looks just like her father. I’m Carol, by the way.”

“Great meeting you, Carol,” Bria said, shaking hands with her and then looking down at Ava again. She had a tiny body and a pair of curious blue eyes that stopped at nothing; Bria couldn’t stop looking at her because she reminded her a bit too much of Kade. She wondered where he was, and even though she was a bit relieved, a part of her was disappointed she didn’t get to see him. She wondered about him a lot and the fact that he now had a daughter honestly blew her mind.

“You want to go play with the other kids?” she asked her, but she turned around again and latched onto her grandmother’s leg.

“Come on, you see those kids over there? They’re playing tic tac toe … you love tic tac toe!”

Ava blinked at them, her lips twitching to a smile. She then peered up at her grandma and tugged at her jeans. “Come on, go ahead!” she encouraged her. Without uttering another word, Ava scurried over, joining the other kids at one of the tables. “Oh, thank God,” Carol said, breathing a sigh of relief. “She hasn’t slept all night, the poor thing.”

“Oh, why is that?” Bria asked, her hand flying to her chest.

“Well, it’s a long story. Care to hear it?”

Bria nodded, eager to hear.

“Well, she’s been having these nightmares, so she’s having a hard time falling asleep. Actually, we all are.” Carol smiled to herself and shifted her weight to one leg. “She wakes up screaming in the middle of the night; it’s usually her dad that comforts her.”

“Oh, did her dad show up today, by any chance?” Bria asked, trying to be subtle but failing miserably.

“He had to work, today’s his first day at his new job. I don’t know why I’m telling you all of this.”

“That’s okay,” Bria said. Back in high school, she had always wanted to meet Kade’s mother, but he never let her because he thought it would have been weird. Now there she was, standing in front of her in flip flops and a sun dress in fifty-degree weather. “I like to listen.”

“That’s why you became a teacher?” Carol asked, rather sarcastically. Bria thought that Kade probably had her wit, but then again she thought she was overselling him. After all, she hadn’t seen or talked to him in almost ten years now, how could she have possibly known if he grew up to be a man, let alone a witty one?

“Yeah well, I talk a lot, too,” she said finally.

“Wow, I wish my son was more of a talker,” Carol said, her eyes fixated somewhere over Bria’s shoulder. “He’s a quiet one.”

Some things never change, Bri thought to herself. “Is Ava quiet, too?”

“Not really, I don’t think you can tell yet. But she’s a sad little girl, she needs a little bit of cheering up.”

“That’s too bad,” Bria said, turning to look at her. By now she had retreated to the far end of the classroom, watching the other kids play. Bri motioned towards the game tables, but she shook her head once again, pouted and looked the other way.

“She looks just like her dad,” Carol said, her voice permeating Bria’s consciousness. She had gotten lost in Ava’s features, which were basically a tinier, less sculpted version of her father’s. She wondered if she even remembered Kade all that well, or if her mind was playing tricks on her. “Anyway, I have to go now. You’ll take care of her, alright?”

“That’s sort of my job,” Bri said, forcing a smile. “You take care now.”

Carol held her hand out, spun on her heel and then headed down the stairs. For a while Bria just stood there, her head full of white noise. Alright, Bri, time to do your thing, she thought to herself before strolling back inside.

* * *

Bria really didn’t know what was coming for her when she went back into that classroom. Ava had managed to cling to her all day, asking her questions, giving her those puppy-dog eyes that reminded her of Kade so much.

“Let me ask you a tough question,” Bria said, getting up on one of the chairs. “Does anyone here like Math?”

Her eyes sailed across the room, until they landed on Ava’s wiggling fingers. Her hand was shot up into the air and her eyes were wide open with what looked to Bria like an unquenchable curiosity. “Me!”

“Really? Well, that makes two of us,” she lied. “What do you like about Math?”

Already, she was getting looks from the rest of her classmates, the kind of looks that foreshadowed a future of bullying. “I don’t know,” she shrugged. “It just makes sense.”

“That’s right!” Bria said. “Math makes sense, that’s why the world is full of it!”

The silver of her eyes lit up and her face came to a smile. She stomped her feet a bunch of times and then clasped her hands together in pure excitement; Bria couldn’t help but see Kade in her every move. It was almost freaky.

Which was why Ava latched onto her for the rest of the day. The other kids had apparently alienated her, which made Bria wonder what the hell she did wrong. All she did was recognize her. I was just being nice, okay? she thought to herself, already questioning her teaching methods. She had been doing this for years now; not once had she encounterd a toddler tribe, or so she called it. Everytime she would ask a question Ava’s hand would shoot up in the air and she would jump up and down enthusiastically, dying to take a shot at the right answer.

“Alright, you guys, it’s time for your lunch break,” she said, flicking her wrist and checking the time. The kids all got up in unison and moved like a flock towards the door, squeezing past one another and scurrying out into the hallway. Bria brushed her fingers through her hair, and then she saw Ava, sitting at her desk still. “Aren’t you gonna eat with the other kids?”

She picked up her bag, unzipped it, and stuffed her hand inside. “Daddy’s packed my lunch!” she said, gleaming. Bria felt a warmth radiate through to her chest. She could only picture Kade standing at the kitchen counter, making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. She imagined him doing it shirtless, too.

“You know, you remind me of myself when I was a little younger,” she said, crouching down next to Ava, who didn’t pay her much attention. She just opened up her lunchbox, unwrapped her sandwich and started nibbling at it. Even though Bria had other things to do, she sat down next to her, watching her eat her lunch and scribble things in her notebook.

“Do you like to draw?” Bri asked her.

“I do. I like to draw things,” Ava mumbled, her words barely audible. Bria watched her quietly; she was hunched over in a child’s seat, eyeing the little girl’s doodles, which included a man, a woman, and lots of flowers blooming at the sides. “Why is mommy laying down on her side?” she asked her, but she didn’t answer, she just doodled her way through the remainder of the hour, until the rest of the kids started pouring into the classroom again. “Um,” Ava uttered, tugging at Bria’s sleeve. “Bathroom.”

“What, you wanna go to the bathroom?” Bri asked, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“Come, let me show you where it is.” She took her hand and led her out to the hallway. “See, it’s right there, end of the hall,” she said before walking back into the classroom, but Ava just stood there like she was pinned to the floor.

“Can you come with me?” she asked her.

“Class is almost starting, Ava,” Bri said, to which the toddler nodded and went back to her seat. “Are you just gonna hold it?”

“Come with me!” she said again, holding her hand out to her. Bria found it to be quite amusing, albeit a little strange.

She had always thought about what it would be like to be a mother and, even though the mere idea of it made her stomach churn, she couldn’t help but soften towards the wide eyed three-year-old. She was careful not to give her special treatment, though. Even though deep down, she really felt like it.

Bria tended to get tired towards the middle of the day and that was when she would send the kids off to sleep. It wasn’t like they were able to focus, anyway; there was something about the scorching noon sun that made them rowdy and ridiculous. “Alright, class, it’s nap time!” she said, waving her hands around. Some kids jerked awake at the mentioning of nap time, which was basically a more legitimate form of sleeping through class. “Everyone line up!”

Bri watched the kids as they got up from seats and struggled to form a line. They stumbled around like bobble heads, and when she looked over at Ava, she was helping the other kids get into position. One by one, they lined up behind her, and then they moved towards the nap room like one giant snake. Sometimes Bria wished she could nap there herself, but as a teacher it was best that she just slept at home.

“This looks comfy, you guys are lucky!” she said, arranging the mattresses and scanning the room with her eyes one last time before stepping out. Suddenly she felt something pushing at her and when she turned around her eyes dropped a couple of inches to meet the top of Ava’s head. She was pushing at the door, trying to get out. “What, you’re gonna follow me during nap time, too?”

The little girl didn’t answer, but she just let her head drop like a deflated balloon. Bri rolled her eyes and picked her up. “Listen, Ava, you can’t follow me around the whole day, okay? You’re going to get tired especially if I’m doing boring adult stuff.”

She grabbed at Bri’s collar and rested her head over her shoulder, and then she had no choice but to carry her back into the teacher’s lounge. “You’re gonna get me in trouble, you know that?” she said, after having succumbed to Ava’s big glacier eyes and small hands. The teacher’s lounge was empty and the windows were wide open. The sunlight poured in like a tsunami and Bri grabbed her chair and situated it in the vast spot of sun, pulling a pile of papers towards her and shuffling through it. “I’m gonna do some work, okay? Can you just sit here until I get it done?”

Ava nodded.

Every once in a while Bria would catch her moving in her peripheral vision and she would shake her head, both in frustration and bewilderment, and then go back to grading papers. “What is that?” Ava asked, pointing in a vague direction.

“Oh, those? Those are papers, I’m grading them.”

“Ohh, red,” the toddler said, grabbing one of the pens off her desk and inspecting it with an alien curiosity. “Why red?”

“That’s a good question.” Bria paused for a moment, clearing her throat. “I don’t know, actually. I think it’s because red is striking.”

“What’s striking?” she asked with her head tilted to the side like a confused puppy.

“Yeah, red is a bold color, that’s why teachers use it to grade papers and point out mistakes.”

“Red is scary,” Ava said before looking down again. Bri passed her an empty sheet of paper to busy herself with.

“Here, draw something.”

“Okay,” Ava said, pinning it down with her fingers and scribbling with her other hand.

“Oh, you’re left-handed? I’m left-handed, too!”

“What?”

“Like, you draw with your left hand. Not many people can do that!”

“I can’t draw with my right hand,” Ava pouted.

“Me, neither,” Bria said, shrugging. “But did you know that left-handed people are said to be smarter than right-handed people?”

Ava’s eyes lit up again, somehow her happiness circulated back to Bria, and it was the purest thing in the world. The two of them sat there for what felt like hours, and even though Bri found her presence to be quite inappropriate because it was against the rules, eventually she got used to having her around and she sort of became a part of the office.

The day was dragging on. Bria went to wake the kids up and then dragged her feet back to class, where she half-baked a math lesson and prepared to leave. And like always, she had to wait until all the kids had been picked up by an adult.

Just push through, Bri. Just one more hour and you’ll be wrapped up in a ‘bed burrito’. Bria didn’t like small talk when she was tired. All those wide-eyed parents pouring in, concerned about their child’s first day. “Did he do well?” “Can you tell he’s a smart kid?” “Hope he didn’t cause you much trouble, you should see what he does at home!”

Bria pushed through an hour of questioning, dad jokes, and misplaced concerns, and then finally, she was ready to go. Until she noticed that Ava was still there.

“Where’s your grandma, Ava?” she asked, smoothing a hand over her hair. She shrugged, but then her eyes snapped to the door. Bria turned around, only to find Kade standing there, scanning around for his daughter. He hesitated for a moment, but when his eyes landed on her, he smiled and started in their direction. Bri felt her heart skip a beat. He was dressed in one hell of a sexy suit; his sleeves were rolled up, his jacket folded around his forearm, and his pants were fitted, showing off a pair of muscular thighs that probably did more than take a stroll around the neighborhood. His gaze swept the room and then their eyes met. And that was when Bria felt the adrenaline burst in her chest and spread out to all four of her limbs.

He recognized her instantly, and he met her gaze with raised eyebrows and a sexy smirk.