My name is Leden, the pantera told me. Her voice was softer than the others, almost a whisper, and her coat was a glistening, snowy white. She was beautiful.

I climbed onto her cautiously, hesitant to put dirt all over her lovely white fur, but she only made a small, snorting sound and reared up a little, forcing me to fall forward and cling.

Hold on, her soft voice cautioned me, sounding amused.

She launched up from the ground, and four other pantera followed, two spanning out either side of her as she took to the sky.

“Where are we going?” I shouted, pressing my face into her soft neck.

She was fast. Faster than any other pantera I had ridden—and she knew it, too, because there was a small hum of appreciation that vibrated through her body as soon as the thought flitted through my head.

We are taking you to the mortal glass. The eyes of the world.

“The what?” I shouted back. “Did you say eyes? You’re taking me to see some eyes?”

Leden didn’t answer, which wasn’t a good sign. I groaned, shaking my head and cursing internally. That was the gamble you made with magical objects: sometimes they were pretty and they tasted good, like the stream; and sometimes they were … eyes.

They didn’t fly far before they began to dip toward the mountains, swooping into a cave and landing in a spray of pebbles and dust. Leden wobbled a little before she managed to straighten herself, and I quickly jumped off her back and took a few steps away before I turned and grinned at her.

“The speed is excellent, but you need to work on the landing.”

She made a grunting sound in the back of her throat that was more animalistic than the graceful noises I had become used to from the pantera, and then she flicked her hoof into the gravel and kicked it up, sending a cloud of dirt and rocks right at me. I quickly covered my face with my arms and laughed. I liked her.

It seems the girl is forming a bond, one of the other panteras noted, causing my head to peek out from between my arms.

“A what?” I asked the cave in general, since I wasn’t sure which of the four, massive, black-furred pantera had spoken.

A bond, this time from Leden, it happens on occasion, between the gods and the pantera. They are children of the same magic, children of the same land.

“I thought you were here long before the gods?” I asked, turning to peer into the cave. It was dark—almost too dark to see anything, though I could still distinguish a faint, black glimmer.

And the land was here long before us, Leden replied, pushing her snout between my shoulder blades and urging me forward, further into the cave. It is not uncommon for the gods to bond to the animals of Topia.

“But I’m not a god,” I whispered, trying to resist the insistent pushes I was receiving, “and I also can’t see in the dark!”

We will bring light, one of the other panteras announced, and then only a moment later, tiny little balls of light began to flicker on, beating against the wings of miniscule creatures that flittered sleepily about the cave.

I stopped moving altogether, my mouth falling open and my eyes going wide. The walls of the cave were lined with a glittery black rock, so smooth in some places and so jagged in others—it almost appeared like glass. The little lights moved around, illuminating further into the cave, and I followed them without the nudging of Leden this time. I could see my own reflection in the rock, walking alongside me with so much awe painted over her face … but then the reflection began to change. Suddenly, I could see five broad backs, their owners all facing the edge of a marble platform.

“What’s happening?” I whispered, as one of the reflections spoke.

“We could just jump. I mean we can’t die or anything.” It was Siret’s voice.

“You know Staviti would have stationed people below,” Yael replied, sounding downright depressed. “Maybe even Crowe himself. Staviti is serious this time—if D.O.D hadn’t insisted that we should be used to test the sols in the arena fights, he might have attempted a way to strip us of our gifts by now.”

“This is bullshit,” Rome growled. “Staviti loves it when sols die—that’s the whole point of the arena fights isn’t it? He doesn’t want them to prove themselves. He just wants them to die.”

“It isn’t about sols dying.” Aros seemed to be offering the voice of reason, judging by his tone. “Staviti doesn’t like us not obeying his commands because it shows the other gods that he can be disobeyed.”

They are not like the other gods, Leden told me, her breath warm against the back of my neck. They are the only beings born of a union between the gods.

“How is that possible?” I asked, reaching out to touch the broad back of Coen against the rock. “So many hundreds and thousands of life-cycles and no children born?”

The voices of the Abcurses were fading away, barely audible to me anymore as the reflection gradually shifted back into my own face.

There were other children. Leden’s soft voice grew even softer, her tone only a gentle hum inside my mind. The sorrow emanating from her was suddenly so acute that I had to wrap my arms around myself.

“What happened to them?” I asked, my voice a rasp.

Staviti did not allow them to live. The reply was short—simple—and yet it dripped with the kind of loss that made my heart ache. The panteras had been born in Topia, just like the Abcurses. It would make sense that they felt connected to the other children born in Topia.

“Why did I see the Abcurses?” I turned from my own reflection, finding the four black panteras lit up by hundreds of little illuminated bugs, while Leden waited directly behind me.

You see who you want to see, Leden answered. Every shard of glass in this cave is a part of Topia. It is how the world is seen. How every being on this world is seen. It is as sacred as the water, and just as protected—

And just like the water, one of the black panteras cut in, it has not escaped the urge of the people to steal and defile.

Suddenly, all of the little light-bugs converged into one small section of the cave, illuminating a part of the rock wall that had been hacked at in several places. Silvery liquid had spilled out and over the cuts like blood, drying and congealing only halfway down the wall.

I flinched, but Leden only nudged me around to face the same part of the wall that I had been facing before, and the bugs dispersed around the cave again.

Let’s begin, she whispered inside my head.

“Begin what?” I replied aloud, probably killing her dramatic vibe a little bit, but I really wasn’t great with riddles and secret caves and magical rock-glass and water that was apparently alive. Those things weren’t inside of my comfort zone.

Leden didn’t answer me, but she didn’t need to, because the glassy surface before me had begun to shift again, my reflection dissolving away. The shape of a woman began to form, almost as if through a screen of smoke; small wisps of colour licked over skirts and limbs, swirling around an upturned face. Suddenly she was clear, and it felt as though I could see her more distinctly here—in the rock—than I might have been able to if I had been there in person. She had ice-blue eyes, melding to green around the pupil; her hair a dusky, golden blonde. She was beautiful—but there was something else about her that drew me in. I couldn’t figure out what it was until she reached out, her hand on the rock that separated us—as though she wanted to reach right through and comfort me in some way.

Pica. Leden’s soft voice sounded inside my head. The goddess of Love. And then I watched, in a series of rapid images, as Pica touched the lives of people who couldn’t see her. Some, she gifted, and some, she cursed. There was a kind of irrational beauty to what she did, as sols courted each other and dweller children ran around each other in the dirt, flirting playfully. All the while, there were two men standing behind her, watching the things she did. I recognised them as Rau, the Asshole of Chaos, and Staviti. Both of them reached out to her, but she only ever turned to Rau. There didn’t seem to be a reason behind her love. It was chaotic.

As soon as that realisation hit me, her image dissolved away, to be replaced by another. The stream from the pantera camp was suddenly flowing along the wall before me: a glittering thing full of life. It seemed so calm and peaceful, little currents visible through the transparent depths. I watched as silver-skinned swimmers wriggled their way through the water—although I realised after a click that they were swimming the wrong way. They were going against the current—upstream. I frowned, watching them wriggle and wriggle and wriggle, until suddenly I could see the entire course of their lives. They struggled to the top of the river, and laid their eggs, before dying. That was the course of their existence. I then watched as their eggs hatched, as the swimmers matured and travelled downstream, and then as the whole process repeated itself.

“It makes no sense,” I found myself saying to the wall.

The things that we are driven to do that go against all sense—those are the things you will find Chaos in, Leden replied. It is not a force of evil, simply a force of nature.

“I think I understand now.” I turned away from the wall, to face the panteras.

Mostly, I was lying. I did understand what they wanted me to see, but I had no idea how to apply it. More than anything—I just wanted to see the Abcurses again.

Without thought, I turned back to the wall. “Will you show me again?” I asked the rock, touching it lightly with my fingers.

The panteras didn’t seem to be controlling it anymore, because it was only showing me my own reflection again. I watched in relief as the image rippled, and the five faces came into view. I was seeing them almost from above this time, as they sat around a circle of benches. There was a familiar glint of midnight black stone set on a table directly in the center of their circle, and I gasped when I saw it. It had been melted down into a gilded frame, almost like a mirror, and I remembered Rome saying something about Siret having stolen D.O.D’s mortal glass before they were banished to their platform.

“Is she in another cave?” Coen grumbled.

“Are those fire-bugs?” Siret added.

“And panteras?” Yael, this time.

“Hey guys!” I replied.

I watched as they all froze, glancing at each other, and then back to the mirror.

“Who’s she talking to?” Siret jumped up from his seat and leaned over the mirror.

“Hey, Five!” I said this time, just to clear up any confusion.

“Me?” Siret sounded dumbfounded, and then the others were all jumping up from their seats, too.

You do not have time for this. Leden broke into my reunion moment, her voice carrying a hint of urgency. Your escort will be arriving soon.

“I can’t be here for long,” I told the guys, keeping the ‘escort’ thing to myself, since I had no idea what that was supposed to mean. “But I’m coming. Stay there. I’ll be there soon.”

“You’re in Topia?” Coen’s question was stuck between surprise and anger. “You snuck into Topia? Do you have a death-wish, Willa-damned-Knight?”

A truly excellent, loaded question. My simple answer was no, I really didn’t. I had always been about living as fully as I could, mostly because death was always one step away. Now, though, death meant something a little different. Would I end up out with the guardians? Or would I become a god, like the Abcurses?

The thought of what might happen when I died stirred up a deep and painful emotion within my chest, cracking little fissures across the protective layer that had been in place for as long as I could remember. A layer that shielded me from the constant rejection and loneliness of my life. Emmy had slipped through: her persistence in loving me had broken the shielding long enough for her to become family. But there had been no one else, until now.

Of course, all of that information remained in my head as I said simply, “Where you guys go, I go.”

Five sets of eyes were locked on the framed stone, and each of their expressions were so different from the other. But each reflected a single quality. Need. In differing ways, the six of us needed each other, and being apart like this had taken a toll. It was deeper and more cutting than I had expected, as though our separation should have been a graze. A little irritating, but easy enough to live with. Instead it felt almost like a fatal wound. Or a poison, where the longer it remained in my system, the more damage it began to cause.

“You need to come back to us now, Willa.” Those solemn words, almost gruffly spoken, came from Aros.

My golden Abcurse didn’t look his usual ethereal, shining beam of light. There was a heaviness in his broad, tense shoulders; a darkness shadowing his furrowed brow and rigid jawline. He was unhappy in a way I had never seen before.

I reached out and brushed my fingers across his image, and his eyes began to glow.

“Come home to us,” was the last demand I heard before their images flickered and disappeared.

A small whimper escaped before I could stop it, my body slumping into the rocks. The pain was almost too much, but I knew I could deal with it. They weren’t dead, even though it felt like all the worlds were working to keep us apart now.

Straightening, I smoothed my expression as best as I could, tucking the pain away as I turned to the panteras. Except only Leden remained now, the others had disappeared.

You are stronger than we expected, for one so young. As hard as it is to believe, your sufferings were gifts, in a way. They formed a being far more exceptional than simple genetics ever could.

“Can you tell me more about how I have tasted the water before this sun-cycle?” Couldn’t hurt to ask, on the off-chance that my mother had fried the brain cells that remembered my childhood.

All I can tell you is that you did not absorb the water in the same way as Staviti. You are unique.

Like the Abcurses. For some reason that made me happy, and I didn’t feel a need to push for more information.

“Can’t leave you anywhere, doll. You really should just stick by my side.”

The deep, rich voice echoed through the cave, and I immediately dropped into a semblance of a fighting position, a curse falling from my lips. He was my escort?

Cyrus was propped against the wall nearby, looking smug and amused. “Are you going to hit me?” His grin grew even broader as he straightened and strode gracefully toward me. “After everything I’ve done for you.”

A red haze started to edge across my side vision, and I was fighting hard to keep myself from charging him. “What you’ve done for me? You mean besides the part where you broke my soul-link to the Abcurses? Twice! Then you pretended this necklace could take the curse.” I reached down and yanked it up, just in case he had forgotten. “Or when you started controlling me and causing Chaos and fires and squished bodies!”

The last part left me in a shriek and I couldn’t stop myself any longer. I let out a war-like cry and sprinted as fast as my clumsy little legs could take me, somehow avoiding two large rocks, which would have tripped me up before I started.

Cyrus didn’t even move, he just threw his head back and laughed so loudly the entire cave seemed to shake around us. He wasn’t even remotely taking me seriously. Focussing on his chin, hoping I could reach it, my fists were already lifting when my right foot hit a particularly loose patch of rocks and I started to slide out. I tried to straighten, my arms going out to the sides in a steadying motion. My right foot tangled in my left then and I was plunging forward. And since my arms had been way up above me, there was no chance I was going to get them down in time to stop my face breaking the fall.

Cyrus was a beat too slow to catch me, since he’d had his head back laughing when I tripped, but he noticed just in time to step into me. Which meant that instead of my head slamming into the hard rocks, it crashed right into his crotch. He let out a bit of a yelping groan, before both of us went down in a heap.

I was stunned for a click, darkness dancing across my vision. What the hell was in his pants? Steel ballbags?

Another chuckling groan from above, and I realised I’d said that out loud when he replied. “If you don’t get your face off my dick, Willa, you’re going to find out.”

I gasped when I realised I was still fully face down, on an area that seemed to be enjoying the attention. With another gasp, I rolled over, and lay on my back, breathing in and out quickly. I knew that my face would be bright red. Or whatever colour was even redder than red because holy shit.

Why did these things keep happening to me? A shadow washed over my face, but my hand was firmly over my eyes, hiding me from the world. After a click, knowing there was no way to delay any longer, I removed my palm from my burning face, and looked up at Cyrus. He was still wearing that stupid grin.

“Stop looking at me like that!” I hissed at him, trying to bring some normalcy back to the situation.

Before I could say another thing, a second shadow appeared and Cyrus went flying through the air. I jumped to my feet far quicker than I should have been able to from flat on my back, my head swivelling left and right rapidly as I tried to figure out who was attacking us.

The only being standing close by was Leden. And even though it was very difficult to tell on the pantera’s face, she sort of looked like she was grinning.

Whoops, she said. Slipped.

Cyrus let out a snort as he peeled himself off the wall and crossed back to us. I noticed that he had two distinct-looking hoof marks on his chest, just visible above the line of his shirt.

Leden had kicked him for me? I let out an internal cheer, before reaching out and giving her a one-armed hug around the neck. “I owe you one,” I whispered into her throat.

He’s not a bad god. But all of the gods, at varying times, need to be taught a lesson in respect.

Cyrus’s expression was back to a more neutral style as he stopped near me, looking almost unharmed except for the fading marks. I knew they’d be completely gone in a click.

“Maybe we should start again,” he tried, sounding just a tad less arrogant. “I think you might have the wrong idea about my involvement in your life dramas.”

I crossed my arms over my chest, finally realising how little I was wearing. Sure, underwear was actually better than my usual bouts of nudity, but I was still pretty skimpily dressed. Alone. With the Neutral God whose Neutral Dick had been briefly having non-neutral feelings.

Lucky I had my new friend.

“You already know why I helped Rau initially. I didn’t know you then. I cared nothing for the problems of a dweller, and Rau had something I needed.”

I nodded, telling him to continue. I definitely remembered all of that clearly.

“I called you doll because you were so weak, fragile … nothing of substance.”

My eyes were narrowing, fists clenching beneath my crossed arms. “You better be getting to the point where I don’t want to punch you again.”

A half-smirk. “Well, if you remember correctly, you didn’t punch me, you dropped your face into my di—”

“Not the point!” I interrupted quickly, feeling the heat climbing into my cheeks again.

He gave me a break then, continuing with his story. “I was wrong. You’re not exactly the doll I expected,” he finally admitted. “You have substance, Willa Knight. I see now why the Abcurses have threatened more gods in the past few moon-cycles, than they have in their many life-cycles before that.”

Oh, was I actually going to find out how old they were?

Before I could push, he changed direction. “They are feared by many. Loved by very few,” he added, probably noticing the interest in my gaze. “The fact that you made it to their inner circle. You’re no ordinary being.”

Leden nudged against me, as if to say I told you so.

“But you do need a lot of looking after.” Cyrus was back to being an asshole, though for some reason it didn’t seem as mean as usual. “Which is why I have been trying to help you through the soul-link.”

It’s true, Leden said. When we gave him the stone, we made him promise that you were the only being to have it, and that he would protect you.

Cyrus nodded, which told me he had heard her words also. “I’m not great at Chaos either.” I could tell that not being good at something was unusual, and he looked mighty pissed about it, his ethereally beautiful face going hard. “But you were alive, so I didn’t complain too much.”

I shook my head, much of my fury at him fading away. “You just used a little too much anger and oomph, I think.”

He was very close to me now, and despite the lighting being only provided from the tiny bugs, I could still see every facet of blue in his very pale eyes. “That sol, Dru … he needed to die. I tried to ensure that he would not have a chance to follow up on whatever he was planning.”

I gasped, having forgotten about Dru and his side-bitch. “You knew? How did you know? I mean it was weird how he was always around, always showing up, flirting. Never even caring that the Abcurses could break him like a twig. Despite his mountainous size.” My words tumbled over each other, punctuated by the rage I was still holding onto.

Cyrus just shook his head. “You’re trying to tell me something, I just know it.”

I smacked him in the shoulder, before shaking my head. “You understood me.”

His expression turned lethal, iciness pouring from him as he looked at his shoulder. I quickly withdrew my hand. Scary Cyrus was back.

His next words were clipped. “Whoever you’ve been soul-linked to will always have a connection with you. An eternal bond.”

I wasn’t sure exactly what he was saying, but his closeness was confusing me. Along with his hot and cold behaviour. When I just continued staring unblinkingly at him, he shook his head and took a step back. I finally felt like I could breathe again.

It’s time for you to return to your gods. Leden’s distraction was a welcome relief. As her words registered, I couldn’t stop from throwing my arms around her.

“Will I see you again?” I felt a little bereft at leaving.

She nodded, large dark eyes blinking a few times. We will meet again very soon. When the water calls, you listen.

Then with that, she turned and walked out of the cave. The lights were fading around us now, so with a ragged breath I turned to Cyrus. “I believe you weren’t trying to use me to cause Chaos.” Another deep breath as I struggled with the next words. “Thank you.” It sounded a little grudging, but I got there in the end.

He just shook his head before reaching out to me, he paused before touching me, his gaze seemed to be asking for permission. I waited a few beats, before finally nodding.

I was scooped up against his chest, my legs dangling from the ground as though I was a child. “Do you ever wear clothes, doll?”

I shrugged. “Siret always makes them so tight that it’s much more comfortable this way.”

“Clever Siret.” I heard him murmur, but before I could say anything else, he did his flashing thing and everything went dark.