Chapter 8
Well after midnight, Keva tiptoed downstairs, her heart in her throat. When she stepped into the kitchen, however, she forgot to breathe for a second. “What are you doing?”
“Just grabbing some water.” Dagen quietly shut the refrigerator door behind him, a jug of water in hand. The man was completely shirtless and holy crap, that chest.
She knew she was staring but couldn’t seem to stop herself as her mouth dropped open. He could not be real. Maybe she was dreaming? Ripped lines and striations of a defined eight-pack had her mouth watering. Realizing she needed to stop gawking at him like a horny teenager, she cleared her throat and managed to force her gaze upward. When she met his, instead of amusement, she found him watching her with clear hunger in those gorgeous eyes.
Noooo, they were not going there.
Too bad her body didn’t agree. Her nipples beaded tightly against her soft top, the friction against the material driving her crazy.
“I hope I didn’t wake you up?” he asked softly, pulling down a glass from the cabinet.
She shook her head and stepped farther into the room. He hadn’t turned any lights on, but there was enough outside light from the near full moon spilling in that she didn’t bother either. “No. Will you pour me a glass too?” Because her mouth was dry as sand now that he was standing there shirtless in front of her.
When he turned she had a perfect view of his back and butt—which was unfortunately covered. Damn it, she had to stop looking at him like that. He was here for one reason and one reason only. To keep her safe. Not as some piece of eye candy for her to stare at…and lust after.
“Thanks,” she said, taking the glass from him and trying her best to ignore the little zap of energy she felt when their fingers brushed. “So what exactly do you do for the clan? Apart from real estate deals.” She jumped up on the nearest countertop and took a sip of water. There was no way she could sleep now and she genuinely liked his company. And okay, she was super curious about him.
He leaned against the countertop, way too close for comfort. Maybe a foot separated them and it seemed too far yet too near at the same time. She had the crazy urge to pull him to her even as she knew she should keep him at a nice distance. Stupid hormones.
“Honestly, what I do is make money. I handle a lot of business for the clan. I’m very loosely related to Conall through a distant bloodline, and about six months ago he officially accepted me as a member of his clan.”
“Oh, so you were part of another clan before?” She wasn’t really sure how any of this shifter family stuff worked. Her ex had told her some things but he hadn’t been a fountain of information. Or truth.
“Sort of… Yes. I was.”
“And?” she prodded.
“And what?”
“Come on. I told you about pretty much the worst time of my life. You’ve gotta give me something about yourself.”
He was silent for a long moment as he watched her. Then he said, “I was part of another clan for many years, but I never fully integrated. Something happened to me a couple centuries ago, and…” He cleared his throat. “Anyway, my clan never felt like home to me. Not truly.”
She really wanted to ask what had happened, but it was clear that it must have been painful for him. So she didn’t push. If anything she was surprised he’d even told her that much. “Why Conall’s clan?”
“A few reasons. I knew that his brother and he himself had recently mated with wolves. And his clan is much more integrated with other shifter species. And humans, for that matter. I like that they’re not so segregated.”
She lifted her eyebrows slightly. “Was your clan dragons only?”
He nodded once. “Don’t get me wrong, they’re decent dragons, but many of them were set in their ways. They didn’t like outsiders, especially humans. And it never sat well with me. Probably another reason why I never fully integrated into my clan. It’s stupid not to integrate, for social and economic reasons.” He lifted a shoulder.
“What about your parents?”
“They’re in Hibernation.”
She frowned, not completely understanding. Bears hibernated. Dragons did too?
“I’ll explain it to you one day,” he said, clearly reading her confusion.
She nodded once. “So…any news on Richard?”
His expression darkened, his eyes seeming to flicker in the moonlight. “No. And he hasn’t been sniffing around your property either. I would’ve heard or smelled him. You do have a bold family of raccoons that likes to forage around your yard.”
She grinned. “I know. I actually feed them.”
That pulled a smile out of him and it changed his entire countenance. He was so serious and rough-looking sometimes and she found she really loved making him smile. And she felt that smile way down deep in her abdomen—and other parts.
Dagen simply watched her right back, not bothering to hide his hunger for her.
No. No, no, no. Damn it. Something told her that if she leaned forward just a bit, or gave the slightest inclination that she wanted to kiss him, he’d be on her. And that she would love every second of it.
But…no. “I should probably go upstairs,” Keva whispered into the thick, growing silence. Yeah, she really should go upstairs. Otherwise she was going to do something incredibly stupid any second now. Like kiss Dagen. A lot.
He shifted slightly down the countertop until he was caging her in, both his hands planted on either side of her body. But for some reason, she didn’t feel caged in. Instead she felt protected.
Something he’d made her feel from the moment they’d met. Well, almost. He was kind of a jackass at that first meeting. But his apology had been real, and ever since then he’d been kind of perfect. All awkward at first, then sexy warrior.
“You make it hard to breathe,” he whispered. His gaze had gone bright. She knew the man was still looking at her, but she swore his dragon was just beneath the surface. And she wasn’t even sure how she knew that, but she did. Without a doubt.
She swallowed. “You can’t just say stuff like that. We’re…friends.”
His gaze dipped to her mouth, his eyes going molten. “I think we both know that’s not true. We’re more than friends. Or I hope we will be.”
Though she wanted to reach out and touch him, to trail her fingers over all that bare skin, she resisted the urge. Somehow. Instead she curled her fingers into her palms, the little bite of pain reminding her she needed to stop whatever was going on right now. “Look, I’m attracted to you. There’s no use in denying it. But the power dynamic between us is simply too vast.”
“You wouldn’t say that if you knew what kind of power you held over me.”
“You say that now, but things could change.”
“Not for my kind. What do you know about dragons—” He abruptly stopped talking.
“What?”
He shoved out a breath and looked away but didn’t move from his position. “Nothing.”
“It’s probably impossible for you to understand where I’m coming from. You’re a freaking dragon shifter. You’ve never felt alone and vulnerable. Unable to defend yourself. I don’t think you would hurt me. I also never thought Randall would either. It’s just… You can’t know what it is to be at the bottom of the food chain, to be so very aware of your mortality. Of your weakness.”
He looked back at her and there were far too many emotions in his eyes. Then he stepped back, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. His forearms flexed with the movement. He remained silent for a long moment, the moonlight streaming in from two of the kitchen windows illuminating him and all his beautiful glory.
When he spoke again, his voice was lower, raspier. “A couple centuries ago I was captured by a shape-shifting witch. Shape-shifters alone are rare. So are witches. True witches, anyway. She was both, a rare anomaly with a lot of power. And she wanted more. She caught me mid-shift, literally, and…I won’t go into all the details, but she imprisoned me. She took my blood, took…other things.” He closed his eyes for a moment, his jaw tightening once before he opened them. “She raped me, made me enjoy it. At least…physically. I hated it even if I…” He cleared his throat. “It was a long time after I escaped before I was able to actually have sex again, let alone enjoy it in a healthy way.”
In that moment, Keva felt very small for what she’d said to him, the assumptions she’d made. God, she was an asshole, assuming he didn’t understand what it was to know pain or be vulnerable because of who he was. She slid off the counter and stepped toward him as he spoke, ready to pull him into a hug.
To her surprise, he didn’t step back, instead just wrapped his arms around her as he continued talking. “I eventually escaped. Obviously. But I’ve never forgotten that feeling of being so helpless. It’s why I had a hard time in the elevator when we first met. Intellectually I knew I could break out of that contraption, but sometimes I’m still that young dragon trapped in the enchanted prison cell with no way out, no way to stop her from hurting me. And small spaces trigger those memories. It doesn’t seem to matter how many years have passed. I’ve never forgotten that feeling.”
“I’m so sorry,” she murmured against his chest. “So, so sorry.” It was horrific to think of anyone defiling him that way. She hoped the witch had suffered when she died.
“The power level between us is different, yes. But there are things about dragons you don’t know yet. Things I’m not able to tell you. But…when dragons mate, it’s for life. And mates are equal in a way I don’t think you understand.”
He was right, she had no clue what he meant. She had more questions but right now she just held him tight. Everything about him was rock-hard against her body, his scent earthy and masculine, wrapping around her. She couldn’t believe he’d opened up to her so much and hated that he’d ever been in prison and hurt, abused. “Is the shape-shifter dead?”
He let out a dark growl. “Yes.”
All right, then. She didn’t know what else to say so she simply held him and let him hold her in return. It could’ve been an hour or a minute; she had no concept of time, and when he pulled back, his dragon was in his eyes.
“I need to shift, and I’m going to keep watch outside. I’ll be camouflaged so you won’t see me, but know that I’ll be there. Protecting you.”
“You don’t have to sleep outside.” She hated the thought of him doing so. Especially now.
Those delicious lips pulled up in a half-smile. “Trust me, I don’t mind. I need to stretch my wings and I need space for myself.”
She wasn’t sure how to take that but she nodded. “I’m here if you need me.” It felt stupid to say that but he’d been there for her, and was protecting her from a threat when he didn’t have to. She wanted to give something back to him.
She also wanted… Gah. She didn’t know what she wanted at this point. But she was seriously rethinking her whole “just friends” idea.