Delilah Rae Noelle

Jason Koster rolled into town like he still owned it. He just might, considering he’s only been back one week and he’s the talk of the town.

Just like old times.

It’s not like the locals have anything better to gossip about, but I don’t like being thrown into the mix. I’ve managed to keep most of my drama at bay despite Cole’s best efforts. But here I am at the center of everyone’s chatter because I once dated the hometown hero.

And then he broke my heart.

When I first got wind he was back, I felt a surge of giddiness. That flew out the window as I started to worry how Cole would take the news. I’ve finally found a peaceful coexistence with him in this godforsaken town, but now this will stir everything right back up. Cole won’t be happy. Hopefully the gossip girls don’t mosey this way tonight.

From the time they were five and catching tadpoles out on the shores of the lake, Jason and Cole had been best friends.

They were best friends up until I came between them. Insecurity and immaturity sent me into the arms of someone who should have never been more than a friend.

Among other hard lessons, I’ve learned the word catastrophe is also spelled C-O-L-E C-U-T-L-E-R.

I’ve made amends with myself over my role in that relationship and marriage. Amends with lingering regrets. I made things as right as I could with the people I hurt—the people I always loved and who cared about me. Like Meredith Koster. She’d been like a second mother to me when my mother passed away. My sister, who’d endured snide comments about what a whore I was. Endured, minus the time she knocked Sabrina Smith right in the kisser for calling me a slut. Shelby Noelle had never been in a fight prior, much less clocked someone, but everyone had their limits, and Sabrina Smith pushed my sister’s that day. Sabrina still crosses the street when she sees the Noelle sisters. She was a mean girl all through school so it’s not a loss to us.

Billy Langston is one of my constants. If you would have asked me at fifteen if the geeky kid who had lanky legs and a really bad sense of humor would one day be the only man I relied on, I would have laughed all night. Now I know better. Sometimes it’s the underdogs who become the true heroes.

He’s been there more times than I can count and has stood by me. I’ve never asked him why. I often wonder what his answer will be, but I’m afraid to ask in case it changes things. Both he and Daryl were caught in the middle of this ugly triangle back in the day, but while Daryl firmly took Cole’s side against Jason, Billy is a trusted ally to me, and it seems Jason, even to this day. He’s a good guy.

I’ve dropped more than a few hints to my sister about possibly hooking them up. Billy’s outgrown those gangly legs, and his sense of humor is better than I remembered. He has made me laugh more than I imagined possible. But Jason’s back, so I’m curious how that might affect my relationship with Billy. He doesn’t come by all the time, but Billy’s not been hanging out as much as usual this week. I’ve noticed, but I don’t say anything. Jason is one of his best friends. I imagine they’ve picked up like no time has passed at all.

I set the prom pic back in the shoebox and put the lid on. Tucking it in the back of my closet, I shake my head at myself. That I’m nervous over Jason Koster being back is completely ridiculous. I don’t know why he is or why he wants to see me, but I intend to find out what he’s up to. I just wish it wasn’t over dinner.

While slipping on a pair of flats, I stop to check my outfit in the mirror and dab a bit more gloss on my lips. My makeup is light but pretty, my dress cotton and cool for the warm day, and my legs freshly shaven.

Wait, what?

I roll my eyes and walk away from the mirror. There’s no justifying how I spent the last hour getting ready for a man who is forcing me to have dinner with him when all I want to do is try to push away the heartbreak his presence has brought back.

Visions of his face that day all those years ago come back like a torpedo. If I’d really looked at him, I could’ve seen how broken he was too. He’d said it was for us. Promised me we’d be fine. But that was a lie. Jason had no way of keeping that promise, much less making it. I thought he loved me as much as I loved him. Clearly, I was wrong. Someone who loves you wouldn’t make a decision about your future without consulting his or her partner.

Partner.

That’s the problem. I wasn’t a partner in that relationship. I was only a girl holding him back. Taking a deep breath, I try to rid my mind of that memory and the pain I still feel to this day. I grab my phone, head out onto the front porch, and call my sister. Shelby answers right away, “Hey, sis.”

“Why do you have to live so far away?”

She laughs, but it’s light, both of us well aware of the reason why. “Are you nervous or excited?”

“My emotions are undecided how to feel about him. On the one hand—”

“Oh, here we go.”

“Hush. It’s true. He hurt me, and that pain is tangible even now four years later.”

“But?”

“I’m getting there. But he does look good, even better than I remember, and more charming if that’s even possible.” Smelled amazing too, just like he used to. I was tempted to touch that clean-shaven jaw of his, to run the tips of my fingers over the veins in his hands as he gripped my door like I’d escape if he didn’t. He was intense. Determined. On a mission. Powerful. I struggle to swallow, remembering how imposing his body was, how he leaned in, leaving me no room to say no. God, it was hot. I start fanning myself with—

“Jason Koster could charm a porcupine out of its needles. Your panties never stood a chance.”

“Stop teasing.” I’d like to argue her point, but she’s right on the money. I won’t tell her that though. She’ll hold it over me because Jason was everything—handsome, charismatic, talented, intelligent, and sexier than any man ever should be. But I thought I was his everything and I wasn’t, so what do I know? “Did you book your flight?”

“Yep. Now you have to clean the house and get that farm back in order.” She laughs. “Do you have a few minutes to go over invoices?”

The sound of tires grinding against the gravel of my dirt driveway alerts me to a visitor. “Actually, he’s here. I need to go. We can go over them tomorrow.”

“Don’t sleep with him.”

“What? There’s no way in hell I’m sleeping with Jason. If that’s what he thinks he’s getting for dinner, he’ll be sorely disappointed.”

“How much do you want to wager?”

“I am not sleeping with that man, Shelby.”

“All right,” she replies, her tone sounding like she doesn’t believe me. “So one of your homemade pies?”

“I’m not sleeping with him.” She’s ridiculous. “Fine. I’ll wager a pie.”

Giggling, she adds, “Good luck, little sis.”

“Whatever. Talk tomorrow.”

As soon as she says bye, I run to the bathroom, check my appearance, and smack my lips together to spread the gloss. While I make my way casually to the front door—like I don’t have a care in the world, despite my whole body and mind caring too much—I dispute her claim. I will not sleep with him. I’m not attracted to Jason Koster anymore. I swing the door open, my thoughts still buzzing. We are two different people than we were four years ag—HOLY hell. Lord, help me. I’m in trouble.

The color brown was never fitting for Jason’s eyes—vibrant, full of life, joy, love. Those words always seem to fit his shade better. All those things still light up that color I never could pinpoint with basic adjectives, but being this close to him now with the screen door open, there’s a new emotion hidden inside near the darkness of his pupils. I’m thinking it’s life. It gets to us all sometime or another, but his concerns me. What has stolen the light from his eyes?

“Hi,” he says with a smirky grin that reminds me of my sister’s warning that my panties never stood a chance. Poof. Yup, he’s still got it.

I walk out. “Hi there yourself.” Leaning against the railing, needing a few feet of distance between us, between me and those eyes and that smile, and from how amazing he smells. “So why did you want to have dinner together?”

The screen door flies from his hand, and he nods to his truck. “Because we have to eat. You hungry, Delilah?”

Honestly, I have nothing to prove, and my sister would never really make me pay up on any wager, fictional or real. But when I hear my name roll off his tongue like he just tasted the sweetest ice cream he ever had, my body and mind remember like it was yesterday when he used to say it prefaced by three little words I don’t say anymore. His deep tone jumpstarts my heart, and I swear my fingers tighten around that old white wood railing.

He asks, “You okay?”

“Good. Yeah.” I wave my hands in front of me, but when it looks like flailing, I pretend to swat. “Damn mosquitoes.”

Looking around confused, his brow furrows. “Oh wow, I didn’t notice. Do you want to go inside?”

“No,” I shout. “I mean,” I add, lowering my voice, “no. Outside is good.” He’s staring at me. I bite my lip, shake my head, and dash down the steps. “I’m starved. What’d you bring?”

I make it to the truck before turning back. Jason is still standing on the porch, his head tilted down, his eyes watching me while he scratches the back of his neck. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” I ask, leaning my hip against the bumper.

“I didn’t intend to make you so uncomfortable.”

“What are your intentions?”

He descends the steps with ease in his body and confidence in his stride. “To feed you.” Walking right up next to me, he reaches into the bed of the truck and holds up a picnic basket. “I was thinking we could eat at the lake on the pier.”

“Oh, that pier is long past safe these days, but I can grab a blanket or chairs for the grass.”

Holding up a blanket, he adds, “I came prepared.”

“Oh, I bet you did,” I mumble under my breath.

“What was that?”

“Nothing.”

He walks around to the passenger’s door and opens it for me. “Hop in, honeysuckle.”

Honeysuckle.

I wish I didn’t like that so much, but the memories of how I got the name warm my insides, the taste of his kiss still lingering on my tongue as if it happened yesterday. He offers me a hand and I take it without thinking. If I had been thinking, I would have prepared for the current flowing between us like a live wire. I would have remembered how my body always came alive under his touch, and I would have remembered to breathe as my body brushed against his. Hell, if I were thinking at all, I wouldn’t have accepted this date. But I wasn’t, and here I am sitting in the cab of his truck with so many good times flashing back.

“I didn’t realize your mom kept your truck.”

“She didn’t have to,” he says, starting the engine. He drives across the property as if he never left. “She even takes her out for monthly drives.”

“I once saw it driving through town, but figured I must have been seeing things.”

He smiles, but it slips away when his eyes find the lake ahead. Shifting the truck into park, he rests his arms on the top of the steering wheel. “Wow, it’s exactly the same.”

The lake doesn’t get the same attention from me since he’s stolen all of mine. He turns to me, catching my eyes on him. “Hi.”

Jason’s sweet enough to not embarrass me. “Hi.”

“You were staring.” Okay, maybe he’s not so sweet.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I like when you look at me.” My cheeks heat because he not only likes me looking at him, but he’s noticed me staring at him. I open the door, needing to get out of the close confines of the cab of his truck. “Hey,” he calls. When I look over my shoulder, he adds, “You’re making me look bad here. Stay there.” He hops out and runs around. Offering me a hand to get out, he stands, not leaving much room between us.

“You don’t have to worry about me. I can take care of myself.”

When my feet land on the ground, he continues to hold my hand. I’m about to walk away when our hands part, and he shoves his in his pockets. “You were always very independent, so I know you can take care of yourself. But no matter how independent you are or how many years passed between us from then to now, I will always worry about you, Delilah.”

My racing heart calms as if I was tucked into his arms like I used to be. It’s wrong, and my head is swimming in confusion, but it feels good to feel cared for again.