Chapter One

 

Gianna stared out at the water from the deck of her new home. Vista Falls was everything she hoped it would be. Quiet. Serene. Her teenage daughters disdainfully referred to it as “Mayberry” from a long-ago TV series they were too young to remember. But for her it represented the life she’d left behind for him. A sweet life, pure and filled with promise.

“Hey,” her fifteen-year-old daughter said, flopping on the lounge chair, facing the water. “I called for you when I came in. Didn’t you hear me?”

“No, sorry.” She smiled as she turned to face her daughter, who shared so many of her father’s features it sometimes pained Gianna to look at her. “How was school?”

“Okay, I guess,” she said, wrinkling her nose. “It sure ain’t L.A. though. The kids here are lame. Their idea of a good time is watching their football team get wrecked on a Friday night, then going for a burger.”

“There are worse things,” Gianna murmured, knowing full well her daughter wouldn’t agree.

It was the kind of innocent fun Gianna hoped her daughter would appreciate in a few months. Their life in L.A. was a whirlwind of parties, shopping, and boys. And Gianna was determined to haul them off the roller coaster and teach them something about the small-town values she’d learned growing up. Her ex used to scoff at her for trying to teach the girls to value people above possessions, claiming they’d figure it out the hard way. The way he had.

“Where’s your sister? Didn’t she come home with you?”

“She’s trying out for the volleyball team.” Keegan laughed. “Can you believe that? The volleyball team? Since when does she do sports? She’s just about the most uncoordinated person I know.”

Ramsey was a year younger than her sister and trying desperately to step out of her famous father and popular big sister’s shadow.

“Good for her,” Gianna said, sitting on the end of the lounge chair next to her daughter’s. “She’s stepping out of her comfort zone. You should think about doing the same.”

“What do you call this?” Keegan asked, throwing her arms up in the air. “This is so far out of my comfort zone I may as well be living on another planet. I still don’t get why we couldn’t stay with Dad at least until the school year ended.”

Gianna took a deep breath, repeating her manta about staying calm and being patient. “You couldn’t stay with your father because he’s never home. He’s always on the road.”

At twenty, Gunnar and his band had set the world on fire with their music. In their thirties, they cemented their place as rock legends. Now, at forty, they still showed no signs of slowing down. And Gianna had grown weary of being the other woman in his life, second to his love of music.

“He wants to come out and see us,” Keegan said, looking at her mom out of the corner of her eye, as though she were preparing for a fight. “It’s our birthday next month and he doesn’t want to miss it.”

Gianna wanted to remind her it wouldn’t be the first time he hadn’t been around to wish his daughters a happy birthday. More often than not, his greeting came by way of a big fat check and a phone call, like that would make up for never being there.

“You know I’d never try to stop you from seeing him,” Gianna said, faking a smile. “But where would he stay? It’s not like there are any swanky hotels in Vista Falls. As far as I know, there’s just that inn—”

“Why couldn’t he stay here? With us?” Keegan asked, leaning forward. “We have an extra bedroom.”

“Your grandmother said something about visiting around the same time.” Not that she’d ever consent to letting her ex sleep under her roof. He wasn’t even her ex-husband. They’d never married. They just lived together… because he didn’t do marriage. “So we wouldn’t have the room.”

Keegan narrowed her eyes. “You know what I think? I think you’re afraid to be alone with him.”

“Pardon me?” Gianna asked, certain her blue eyes were bugging out her head.

“You heard me. I think that’s the reason you moved too, to get away from him. I think it was making you crazy, having to see him all the time. You said you wanted to move on with your life, start dating again, but couldn’t you have done that there? God knows there’s more men to choose from in L.A. than there are here.”

“Not the kind of men I want to date,” she argued, wishing she could deny her daughter’s claim. Keegan was right. She’d always have a thing for Gunnar Williams, but she was tired of letting that damnable attraction stand in the way of her happiness.

“I think he misses us,” Keegan said quietly. “All of us. He’s been calling me and Ramsey a lot more lately. And he’s been asking about you too.”

Even though they hadn’t lived under the same roof for almost a year, her daughters still believed they were a family and who was she to quash that myth? They’d never been a family. Because Gunnar didn’t want them to be. He wanted to be single. Free.

He didn’t mind having Gianna to come home to and he loved his daughters, but not enough to make a real, life-long commitment to their mother. Eventually, Gianna got tired of waiting and moved out while he was on tour. She left him a note letting him know she needed more than he could give her… and that was the end of their story.

He’d showed up on her parents’ doorstep when he got back to town, begging her to change her mind, claiming he didn’t want to live without her, but talk was cheap and Gianna was tired of listening to his lies.

“I know you love him,” Gianna said, reaching for her daughter’s hand. “But I don’t. Not anymore. Truth be told, I haven’t for some time. And we’re not getting back together. Ever.” Her tone softened at her daughter’s petulant expression. She had her father’s hazel eyes, caramel skin, and raging temper, making her impossible to deal with when she made up her mind about something.

“But he still loves you. I know he does, Mom. He hasn’t been the same since you left him.”

“He hasn’t been the same?” She chuckled. “According to the tabloids, he’s been exactly the same. Still partying like a teenager—”

“You can’t believe everything you read,” Keegan said, rolling her eyes. “Isn’t that what you’re always telling us?”

“I don’t want to talk about your father anymore, honey.” She’d be happy if she never had to utter his name again. “Let’s go in and start dinner. I was thinking of chicken stir-fry. You can chop the veggies.”

 

***

 

Gunnar stared at a photo of his girls, the same one that had resided on top of his baby grand piano since the day they walked out on him.

Gianna still took his breath away. The teenager who’d won backstage passes to his concert twenty years ago had grown into a stunning woman… who still owned him.

“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be working, boss?” his bass player, Rich, asked, plopping down on the distressed leather sofa in Gunnar’s home studio.

“I was just thinking.”

Rich’s gaze strayed to the photo. “Still missin’ them, huh?”

It had been three months since Gianna moved the girls clear across the country and he still couldn’t get used to the idea of having to board a plane instead of hop in his car whenever he wanted to see them.

“I can’t believe she took them so far away. What the hell was she thinking?”

“Maybe that you’re never around, so it wouldn’t matter where they lived?” Rich smirked when Gunnar glared at him. “Come on, man. You know this was never Gi’s scene. She was a sweet, small-town girl when you met her. You tried to corrupt her, get her to take a walk on the wild side with you, but it didn’t work.”

He cringed when he thought of some of the things she’d tolerated over the years. He’d once been so high at a concert that he’d allowed some dude on his security team to feel her up backstage while she tried to push him away. Just a quickie, the dude suggested, prompting Gi to slap him across the face before she stormed out.

She wanted to be his. All his. And he’d blown it.

“I was an idiot for trying to sell her on this shit,” he said, looking around at the gold and platinum records lining his walls. “She had the right idea all along. She knew what was important. I didn’t have a clue.”

“What’re you talking about?” Rich asked, looking concerned. “You knew what was important. The music. It’s always been about the music.”

“The music,” Gunnar repeated, swallowing the lump in his throat. “I loved the music. I loved that life, touring the world, making people happy. I loved the fame, the money, everything about it. But I hate what its cost me.”

“Hey, come on. Your girls are going to college in a few years anyhow. By then it won’t matter to them where you are.” He laughed. “Hell, you could be living on some island in the middle of nowhere for all they’d care.”

His friend was right. Soon his girls wouldn’t need him. They wouldn’t care about him. They’d have lives of their own. Work. Husbands. Kids. He’d be lucky to get a birthday or Christmas card from them.

For years, he’d been the one too busy to be a part of their lives. Soon the tables would turn on him and that would leave him alone. With his music. It suddenly hit him like an avalanche. That wouldn’t be enough.

“Where the hell are you going?” Rich asked when Gunnar jumped up. “I thought we were going to hammer out this song?”

“I’m getting them to gas up the jet.”

“What the hell for?”

“I need to see my girls. Now. Tonight.”

 

***

 

Gianna answered the door wearing a long coral sundress and a cropped jean jacket. Her long, dark hair was curled around her face and her makeup was flawlessly applied, which could only mean one thing: she was on her way out.

“Gunnar,” she whispered, stepping out on to the porch and closing the door. “What the hell are you doing here?” She looked down the road when she spotted headlights. “You can’t be here.”

“Why not?” Though she suspected he knew. She had a date. And if that didn’t get him right between the eyes. They’d been apart for a long time, but Gi had never stopped being his. Not in his mind.

“Because I have a life,” she seethed, wrapping her arms around her mid-section as she looked up at him. She was wearing flat sandals, which gave him a full head on her. “Or at least I’m trying to build one and I don’t want the whole town talking about my ex tomorrow.”

“Then no one knows I’m Ramsey and Keegan’s dad?” That pissed him off even more. He wanted every one of those teenage boys to know the power their father wielded, should they even think about stepping out of line.

“Williams is a common name,” Gianna said, sounding defensive. “I just encouraged the girls to keep it under wraps until we got settled here. I want people to get to know us and like us for who we are, not because of our connection to you.”

He took a step closer, backing her into the oversized post at her back. There was still an inferno raging between them and she could pretend she wasn’t ready to combust, but he knew better.

“And we do still have a connection, don’t we, Gi?” He brushed her hair over her shoulder. “Always have. Always will.”

She slapped his hand away. “Our daughters have a connection with you. I don’t.”

“You see my eyes every time you look into theirs,” he said, determined to make her admit she still felt something for him. “And it kills you.”

“You’re wrong. They’re beautiful and smart and strong. When I look at them, I see them. Not you.”

“Then you never think about me?” His gaze dipped to her cleavage while he considered the lucky bastard who’d be admiring it all night. “You never think about the father of your daughters? Your first love—”

“Stop it!” She pressed her hands into his chest, trying to push him away. “I don’t know what the hell you’re doing here or why you’re trying to mess with my head, but it’s not going to work. I have a date and I’m not going to give you a second thought tonight.”

He chuckled as he let her push past him. “You’re such a liar.” His gaze drifted to her left hand. She no longer wore the sapphire and diamond band he’d had made for her when Keegan was born. He told her it symbolized his commitment to her and their family.

“What did you do with it?”

“What?”

“The ring.”

“Which one?” she asked. “You gave me several over the years.”

“Yeah, but not the one you needed.”

She closed her eyes briefly before turning her back on him and crossing the porch.

He followed her, letting his hand graze her hip through the thin dress as he stood behind her. “Would that ring, that goddamn piece of paper, have been enough to keep you with me?”

“None of that matters now,” she said, sounding breathless. “It’s ancient history.”

A car caused Gianna to turn with a start, fixing a smile on her face as she stepped away from him. “Hey, Billy. It’s so good to see you,” she said when he opened the car door.

The man stepped out of the car, slowly walking up the path. He lowered the bouquet of flowers he held out to Gianna as his eyes landed on Gunnar. “Oh, wow. You’re… No, you can’t be…”

“This is um…” Gianna glanced at Gunnar, obviously expecting him to save her.

“Gunnar,” he supplied, extending his hand. He gripped the other man’s hand a little harder than necessary. “Gi’s ex. The father of her children.”

She gaped at Gunnar before snapping her mouth shut and glaring at him. “I’m sorry, Billy. I wasn’t expecting company tonight. If I’d known Gunnar was going to show up like this, uninvited and unannounced, I would have suggested we go out another time.”

“How do you two know each other?” Gunnar asked, ignoring the barb as he crossed his arms and legs and leaned against the wraparound porch railing.

“I own the store next to the flower shop where Gianna works,” he explained. “I’m a photographer. I do photo shoots in the back and sell cameras in the front.”

“You work now?” Gunnar asked, raising an eyebrow. She got five figures a month from him, so he knew she didn’t have to work. When they’d been together, she’d been content to be a full-time mom and active volunteer for several charitable organizations.

“Just part-time,” she explained, blushing. “I love flowers,” she said, admiring the ones Billy had given her. “And I thought this would be a good way for me to meet people.”

“Looks like it’s working,” he said, eyeing her date. “You meet a lot of people that way?”

“Daddy!” The front door opened and Ramsey hurled herself at him.

He laughed as he swept her off her feet and swung her around. “How’s my baby girl?” he asked, kissing her forehead as he set her down. “How’d volleyball tryouts go? You think you made the team?”

Gianna narrowed her eyes at them and he knew she must be wondering how he suddenly knew the minute details of his daughter’s life.

“I’m pretty sure I did,” she said, looking proud of herself. “I can’t believe you’re here! Why didn’t you tell us you were coming?”

“I wanted it to be a surprise.”

“How long can you stay?”

“I guess that’s up to your mom,” he said, glancing at Gianna. “You wouldn’t mind putting me up for a bit, would you, sweetheart?”

She opened and closed her mouth. “There’s an inn in town. Why don’t I call and see if they have any rooms available?”

“Come on, now,” he said, taking his backwards ball cap off to smooth back his dark hair. “You know I hate hotels. Besides, I came here to relax. How can I do that if people are mobbing me for autographs?”

Gianna rolled her eyes. “You’re so full of yourself. What makes you think anyone would care that you’re here?”

“Well, I care,” Ramsey said, slipping her arm through his. “And Keegan will too. So can he stay, Mom? Please. Pretty please?”

“Yeah, come on, Mom,” Gunnar teased. “Let me stay and spend some quality time with my favorite girls.” His eyes travelled up and down her petite frame, letting both Gianna and her date know he still considered her one of his favorite girls.

“Ramsey,” Gianna said, with a tight smile. “Will you please take these flowers inside and put them in water for me? I’d like to have a word with your dad.”

“I’ll wait for you in the car,” Billy said, backing down the steps. “Nice meeting you, Gunnar. Hope you enjoy your stay here.”

Gunnar ignored him, waiting until they were alone for Gi to unleash on him. He raised his hands, wiggling his fingers. “Okay, baby. Come on. Let me have it. I’m a son of a bitch, right? A dirt bag who’s trying to ruin your life?”

“You’re my past,” she said, solemnly, slaying him with those three little words. “Why can’t you just accept that? Why did you have to come here when I’m on the verge of building a new life for myself?”

“With that loser?” he sneered, gesturing to the late model Ford parked in her driveway. “You can’t be serious.”

“Maybe he’s more my type than you ever were. Ever think of that?”

He hated hearing that, mainly because it echoed with a ring of truth. “Keep telling yourself that if it helps you sleep at night.”

“You can’t believe you and I were right for each other.”

She looked him over, taking in the torn jeans and T-shirt, with the colourful ink decorating his arms. He didn’t stand out in a crowd, nor did he want to. He wanted to blend in. Hell, more often than not now, he wanted to be invisible.

“I’m small town. You’re big city. I’m country. You’re rock and roll. I’m a wife material. Mom material. You’re—”

“A good dad,” he said, daring her dispute his claim. “I may not have been there as often as I should have been, but I’d lay down my life for either of those girls and you know it.”

“I know you would,” she said, softly. “It’s not about them, Gunnar. This is about us.”

“Why’d you leave me?”

She shook her head, looking over her shoulder at Billy, who sat in the car waiting for her. “You know why.”

“Because I couldn’t marry you? That’s a stupid reason and you know it. Plenty of people choose to live together.”

“But that’s just it. They choose it. That wasn’t my choice. I made it clear from the start that I wanted a husband and a family.”

“And I made it clear I couldn’t be that guy.”

“Yet you cried when I told you I was pregnant with Keegan. I’d never seen you so happy.”

He grew up a ward of the state. He’d never had a family and didn’t think he wanted or needed one until Gi and his girls came into his life and shook the foundation of his world, making him question everything he’d ever believed about himself.

“Being a dad made me happier than anything ever has. Including my music. You knew that. Yet you took them away from me anyway.” He muttered a curse. “Why? To punish me for not marrying you?”

She shook her head, looking so sad it broke his heart. “I didn’t do it to punish you. Or them. I would never do that. I always put them first. But I got tired of being alone. And lonely.”

“I know I wasn’t home a lot, but—”

“It wasn’t just that and you know it.” She looked at the car parked in her drive. “I can’t talk about this now. I have to go.”

“So I can stay?”

She looked through the living room window. The lights were on and the blinds were up, giving her a clear view inside. Their daughters were curled up on the sofa, but they cast anxious glances at them, obviously trying to gauge the situation.

“I guess I don’t have a choice.”