With my bass guitar strapped to me, my fingers worked to produce the notes that flowed alongside the melodies of Runaway Train’s music. Today’s rehearsal with the guys found us working on some of the new material we were planning on integrating into the show. Usually we only rehearsed the day of the show, but even though we had tonight off, we were making the most of our time.
While I might have been on stage, my mind could barely focus on anything but Allison. Things had been flowing along so easily between us after our talk on Jake’s bus. That was until yesterday. Fuck, being that close to her for the measurements and then reacting the way I did. I’d wanted nothing more than to bury myself deep inside her or have her luscious lips wrapped around my dick.
But it wasn’t just the thoughts of screwing that had invaded my mind. No, it had to do with my heart as well, and how Allison had called me out on not being honest about the feelings I had for her. She’d always been a smart girl, and she was smart enough to see I had been lying to her.
“Okay, I think that’s good for today. Let’s get the hell out of here,” Jake said.
After I handed off my guitar to a roadie, I started out of the arena to the car that was waiting to take us back to the hotel. “Rhys!” Jake called behind me.
Pausing, I waited for him to catch up. “Hey man, I need to ask you a favor,” Jake said.
“Sure. What is it?”
Jake glanced behind us before he spoke. “You got plans tonight?”
I grinned. “Besides ordering in room service and crashing? Hell no.”
“Trust me, that sounds like pure heaven to me too, but I’m taking Abby and the twins out to visit my mom’s brother.”
“That sounds cool. But where does this favor come in? Don’t tell me you have some cousin you want to fix me up with.”
With a grimace, Jake replied, “Actually, I need you to go out with Allison tonight.”
I skidded on the pavement and almost pitched face first into the limo waiting to take us to the hotel. “Excuse me?”
“She’s going out to some club with Gabe and Eli. Normally, I would be stoked to have her chaperoned with two guys, but the way Eli has been looking at her and treating her lately has me fucking wigged out.”
My mind instantly went to Eli’s serenading Allison yesterday morning. Ugh, the douchebag. Maybe his actions weren’t just teasing, and he was really going to pursue something with Allison. When I really thought about it, it did seem he had been spending a lot of time with her after the rehearsals and shows. Fucking hell. I knew I had to drive her away, but the thoughts of driving her straight into Eli’s open arms pissed me off. Not that he wasn’t a decent guy—she could’ve sure as hell done worse for herself. While he was known for partying pretty hard and enjoying the company of ladies, Eli wasn’t such a bastard that he would pull that shit with Allison. While he might have to fear Jake’s wrath if he mistreated Allison, Eli wasn’t a total asshole to play on Allison’s emotions. Deep down, I knew his intentions were decent and honest, and he would be good to Allison.
In the end, it was just the principle of it all that pissed me off so much. Although Eli didn’t know, Allison was my girl, and I didn’t want to think of her with anyone else. The irony that I was having these feelings wasn’t lost on me.
“So what’s it gonna be, man?” Jake asked, bringing me out of my thoughts.
“Oh, uh, yeah, I can go with them.”
He grinned. “Good. I know he won’t try any bullshit if you’re there.”
Inwardly, I groaned. So far, Eli had been an absolute gentleman, while I’d been the vile motherfucker who had defiled his sister. Not to mention the fact that I had been lying to him about my feelings for Allison for the last month, if not longer.
As I slid inside the limo, I had the feeling that tonight was going to be a living hell of epic proportions.
At just before nine, Allison came out of her suite and into Jake and Abby’s where I was waiting to meet her. My low whistle interrupted her stuffing her room key in her purse. She jerked her head up and gasped. I’m sure she had been hoping for Eli or Gabe, but instead she had found me. Her pained expression illustrated the fact that I was the last person on the face of the earth that she wanted to see at the moment. “W-What are y-you doing here?” she stammered.
I motioned down to my dress pants and button-down shirt. “Joining you for a night out on the town.”
Her brows shot up in surprise. “I thought it was just me and the twins.”
Running a hand through my hair, I replied, “Yeah, well, Jake asked me to tag along. I don’t think he liked the thought of you out alone with Gabe and Eli. Well, I guess more precisely being alone with Eli.” I couldn’t help letting my gaze dip down to hungrily take in her appearance. Her long, dark hair fell in loose waves over her shoulders and back. But that wasn’t what had me practically stupefied with lust.
It was the fact she was wearing one hell of a red dress. Unlike the one she’d had on at Saffie’s, this one molded against her body like a second skin, showing every curve in delicious detail. With its one strap and tight bodice, her cleavage was cinched up again, causing my dick to jerk in my pants. “Of course, I don’t think he would have let you out of the suite in that dress.”
“This is utter bullshit!”
“Tell me how you really feel about me going,” I teased.
Throwing one of her hands up in frustration, Allison challenged, “I’m an adult. It’s none of Jake’s business what I do.” She closed the distance between us in two angry strides. “And I sure as hell don’t need you tagging along.”
“Is that right?”
“Yeah it is. I desperately need to have some fun tonight. Not be constantly reminded of the past.”
Her words had a greater effect on me than she could have imagined. While I had to get her to fall out of love with me, I didn’t want to hurt her now or ever. The thoughts that what she had experienced with me in Savannah caused her pain caused an ache in my chest. I drew in a deep breath. “Look, Allison, I can never express how truly sorry I am about what happened between us. More than anything, I just want you to be happy.”
Narrowing her eyes at me, Allison drew her shoulders back. “Yeah, well, fuck you and your bullshit apologies!” She then proceeded to stomp past me. I stared open-mouthed at her retreating form. When she flung open the door, she turned back to me. “Ready, Mr. McGowan?”
“What the hell is this ‘Mr. McGowan’ business?” I demanded, as I joined her at the door.
She shrugged. “I figured since you were my chaperone, I should address you formerly. And since you’ve made it very clear that you want nothing to do with me on a romantic level, I figured calling you that kept the distance you so desired.”
I blinked at her several times. This was a side of Allison I was not used to. Immediately, the expression “Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned” flashed in my mind. “Um, okay,” I finally managed.
When we got out into the hallway, Gabe and Eli were waiting for us down by the elevators. The sight of Allison in her dress caused both of their eyes to bulge, but Eli stepped forward to draw Allison against him. “Damn, you look mighty fine tonight,” he said.
Allison gave him a girlish giggle. “Thank you. It’s one of Abby’s old dresses. I just made some alterations to it.”
Eli pulled away to grimace at Allison. “Ugh, you just totally killed all the naughty fantasies I had running through my head about you by telling me that dress was my sister’s!”
As Allison smacked Eli playfully on the arm, I rolled my eyes. At the rate it was going, it was going to be a long, fucking night, and Jake was going to seriously owe me. That was if I managed not to get arrested for throttling Eli.
After taking the elevator downstairs, we hopped into the limo waiting for us. Eli was a quick bastard. After he allowed Allison to get in first, he then slid in behind her. I was left to sit across from them, giving me a fucking eyeful of Allison’s legs. I wasn’t sure just how happening a nightlife Boise had, but I sure as hell hoped I could get a few good beers in me to numb my mind.
It wasn’t too long before the limo pulled up outside a club. Once we got out, we bypassed the others in line and headed straight inside. Not that there was a massive line like it was the old Studio 54 or something, but it was enough to show we were VIPs.
As we made our way through the crowd, multicolored strobe lights lit up the darkened dance floor. Couples, of different sexes and different arrays of dress, gyrated to the beat. “This place is amazing!” Allison called over the thumping bass of the music.
When Eli’s hand came to rest on the small of her back, I momentarily saw red. Quickly I tried getting a hold of my raging testosterone-fueled emotions before I went into full-on Hulk mode and ripped Eli’s arm from its socket. “Come on. We’ve got a table reserved in the VIP section,” Eli said.
I snorted. “You mean this place actually has a VIP section?”
Ignoring my comment, Allison tilted her head up at Eli. “Oh, so am I a VIP tonight since I’m hanging out with you?”
He flashed her a cocky grin that made me want to punch him. “Maybe.”
After we took the stairs to the second floor, the hostess motioned to our table. From our seats, we could see all the action on the dance floor, but at the same time, we were hidden from view. Considering how dark and foggy it was from the smoke machine, I hoped we wouldn’t be recognized.
“What can I get you all to drink?” a waitress in tight, black spandex shorts, and a halter top asked.
Rubbing his hands together, Eli said, “Mmm, I’m in the mood for shots tonight. Who else is in for a bottle of 1800 Silver?”
“Me,” Allison replied, which caused Eli to grin. He then glanced from her over to me.
“What about you, man?”
With my eyes fixed on Allison’s, I replied, “No thanks. Tequila really isn’t my thing.”
She sucked in a harsh breath as she took in my words. I knew it was a real fucking asshole thing to say considering our history with tequila. But I had to keep pushing her away and get her to forget about me. Once Allison had recovered, she gave me a sickeningly sweet smile. “I’ll take Rhys’s shot then. I adore tequila.”
Eli chuckled. “Ooh, I like your way of thinking tonight.”
“So a bottle of 1800 and what else?” the waitress asked.
“A Bud on tap,” Gabe replied, while giving the waitress his best sexy grin.
“Bud in a bottle,” I replied.
The waitress bobbed her head. “Be right back.” As she walked away, she gave Gabe a lingering look over her shoulder to which he winked at her.
“Dude, out of all the chicks here, you’re macking on the waitress?” Eli questioned.
Gabe shrugged. “She’s hot.”
It was then that a drunken brunette, with cinched-up cleavage and her ass hanging out of her skirt, staggered up to our table. Her gaze honed straight on me. “Hey baby, wanna dance?”
Ordinarily, I might’ve been tempted, but there was no way in hell that I was going to hook-up with a chick tonight. I’d promised Jake to keep an eye on Allison, and it would be pretty hard to do if I was banging some chick in the bathroom. Besides, regardless of how I was trying to push Allison away, I refused to be a douchebag and dance with the chick to get at her. The tequila line had been shitty enough. “No thanks.”
Her glassy-eyed stare fixed on Gabe next. “What about you?”
He shrugged. “Sure, why not.”
“What about the waitress?” Eli asked.
Gabe winked. “The night is still young.”
“Ugh, you’re disgusting,” Allison said, wrinkling her nose.
I got up so Gabe could slide out of the booth. With one hand on the chick’s ass, Gabe led her off to the dance floor.
When I sat back down, Eli was eyeing me with a curious expression. “Why did you pass that one up, man? She looked like a sure thing.”
“Brunettes aren’t my type,” I lied.
Allison’s eyes bulged at my low dig. Cocking her head at me, she demanded, “And just what is your type?”
“I like petite blondes with big tits.” The moment the words left my lips, I felt like a total bastard.
Eli chuckled. “Whatever floats your boat, man. I would think after you hadn’t been getting any action for a while, you’d jump on the chick, regardless of her positives or negatives.”
Once again, I wanted to punch Eli. The last thing I wanted Allison to know was that since Savannah, I hadn’t been able to seal the deal with another girl. Desire for anyone else had been completely obliterated by her. Since we’d been on tour, I hadn’t once taken one of the girls on Jacob’s Ladder’s bus to bed. Now it had been so obvious that Eli had noticed.
When I dared to look at Allison, she was staring at me with wide eyes. It was almost as if she was daring herself to believe that I hadn’t been with any other girls because of her. With the wheels turning in her head, I could tell I was screwed on many levels.
With a shrug, I replied, “Call me picky in my old age.”
Eli laughed. “Whatever, man. We’re the same age, and I don’t think I could have gone as long as you have without getting any.” At Allison’s little squeak, Eli’s face reddened. “Sorry, I keep forgetting that I’m not just out with the guys, and I need to be more of a gentleman.”
Allison gave him a shy smile. “It’s okay.”
The waitress then returned with our drinks. An ache reverberated through my chest as she sat down the bottle of tequila along with the salt and limes. Instantly, I was transported back to that night in Savannah—the night everything had gone so wrong…or in some ways so right.
Eli poured two shot glasses full for him and Allison. After handing a glass to Allison, he held his up. “To us,” he said, with a grin. At Allison’s hesitation, Eli quickly added, “To all of us Runaway Train and Jacob’s Ladder family.”
At his correction, Allison lifted her glass. “To us,” she replied, before clinking it against Eli’s. She then took the glass and tipped it back, sucking down the contents in one gulp. As she grabbed the lime and hastily brought it to her lips, I remembered almost too painfully what her lips had tasted like after she did her shots in Savannah. The way the salt from my neck had clung to them—the way she tasted. Quickly, I looked away and tried to erase the memories from my mind, but they continued to flash in front of my eyes just like the changing strobe lights.
“Another?” Eli asked.
When Allison nodded, I snorted. “What?” she demanded.
“I was just thinking that maybe multiple tequila shots aren’t such a good idea for you.” My gaze left hers and went to Eli’s. “She’s not one for holding her liquor well.”
Allison seethed at me from across the table. I’m pretty sure if given the chance, she would have thrown herself across the table to beat the shit out of me for my smart-ass comment. Tossing her hair over her shoulder, she got her composure back. Her eyes narrowed in on mine. “As much as I hate to admit it, Rhys is right. Although I love tequila, I usually make stupid as hell decisions that fuck up my life when I drink it.”
Once again, this was a side of Allison I wasn’t used to seeing—the bitch with claws. But at the same time, I knew I deserved it. I’d pushed her into making the comments.
After glancing between us, Eli slid the bottle of tequila away from Allison, which caused her to giggle. “Does that mean I don’t get another shot?” she asked, batting her eyelashes at him.
“Um, I think it’s a pretty good idea for you not to do something that fucks up your life when you’re out with me. I have a feeling it would be like a domino effect where Jake would then fuck up my life,” Eli replied, with a grin.
“Just one more,” Allison pleaded.
Eli rolled his eyes. “Fine, fine. I can never tell beautiful girls no.”
“And here I thought it was beautiful girls who couldn’t tell you no,” I countered, as he poured Allison’s shot glass to the brim.
He wagged his eyebrows. “Oh yeah, man, that too.”
Allison shot me a disgusted look before she took her shot glass and downed it. Once again, a shudder went over her fabulous body from the alcohol. She then slammed the glass down onto the table. “Let’s dance,” she suggested to Eli.
“Sounds good to me.”
Watching Allison head off to the dance floor with Eli was like a punch in the gut. It took a few seconds to catch my breath. I reached over and grabbed the tequila bottle. Taking Allison’s glass, I poured it full before downing it in one fiery gulp. I repeated the process twice to try to numb myself better.
Gabe arrived back at the table sans the girl he had been dancing with earlier. “What happened to your sure thing?”
He chuckled. “My sure thing ended up passing out on the dance floor. I got her to a table and then came back here.”
I laughed. “That’s classy.”
“Tell me about it.”
We sat in silence for a few minutes, just drinking our beers. It was a good thing Gabe wasn’t feeling talkative because I don’t think I could have focused on a fucking thing he was saying. My gaze remained firmly on Eli and Allison dancing. Each time his hands started to wander on her body, I tensed. It took everything within me not to get up and go drag her back to the booth.
After ordering another round of beers, Gabe nudged me. “Why don’t you go cut in on the happy couple?”
“Why the hell would I want to do that?” I questioned lamely. I refused to meet Gabe’s eyes for fear that they would betray the emotions I was feeling. There was nothing in the world I wanted to do more than go break up Allison and Eli.
Rolling his eyes, Gabe countered, “Come on, man. You’ve been shooting fucking daggers at my brother the entire time he’s been out there with Allison, not to mention the rest of the night. It’s pretty obvious how you feel about her.”
I shook my head while I played with the label on my beer bottle. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
Gabe rested his arms on the back of the booth and eyed me with a shit-eating grin. “Don’t try to act like you’re not totally hot for her. It’s written all over your face when you look at her. I can’t say I blame you.” He closed his eyes in exaggerated bliss. “If Jake wouldn’t have my dick, mmm, I’d love to fuck her brains out.”
Slamming my beer bottle down on the table, I thrust my finger in his face. “Watch your fucking mouth!”
Instead of fear, Gabe chuckled. “Oh yeah, you’ve got it bad.”
I ran a hand nervously through my hair. “It doesn’t matter what I may or may not feel about Allison. I’m here tonight because Jake wanted me to keep an eye on Allison with Eli.”
With a wink, Gabe said, “And all the while, the wolf was guarding the chicken coop.”
“Whatever,” I mumbled.
“She’s hot for you, too, you know.”
“Is that right?” I snapped, after taking another long swig of beer.
“Oh yeah, it is. Allison’s too sweet a woman to be using Eli just to get at you. If I had to put money on it, I’d imagine that she’s trying to transfer what she’s feeling for you onto him. Most likely, you were a fucking dick who broke her heart by not being emotionally available to her, so she’s ready to move on.”
Cocking my head at Gabe, I said, “Well, thank you for that lovely psychoanalysis, Dr. Fucking Phil!”
Gabe laughed heartily. “It doesn’t have to end badly, man. Just go out there, ask her to dance, and tell her how you really feel about her.” When I opened my mouth to protest, he shook his head. “Yeah, Jake is going to be pissed. But so fucking what? This is your life and happiness we’re talking about, not to mention hers. Do you think we were all really happy that some man-whore douchebag like Jake was putting the moves on our virginal baby sister?” Gabe snorted contemptuously. “Hell no, we weren’t. But it wasn’t up to us—it was up to Jake and Abby.”
With a ragged sigh, I weighed Gabe’s words. Deep down, I knew he was right. All the reasons I tried to tell myself why Allison and I couldn’t be together were really just bullshit and bogus. I was just too much of a fucking pussy to want to risk getting hurt or having Allison realize that I wasn’t the man she thought I was.
“Oh fuck,” Gabe muttered beside me. I didn’t have to wonder what he was talking about when I glanced back out onto the dance floor. Immediately, red flashed before my eyes, and I gripped the booth until my knuckles turned while. I was precariously close to hulking out.
Not only did Eli have his lips on Allison’s, but his hands were practically on her ass. “Oh, hell fucking no!” I shouted, as I flung myself out of the booth for battle.
“Rhys, don’t!” Gabe shouted behind me, but I ignored him. Instead, I barreled on ahead, straight for Allison and Eli.