The sound of the zipper on my suitcase is like a stab to the gut. I realize this is it; I’m leaving behind not only a kickass summer but also my girl. The love of my life. My future. She’s staying here, in California, while I start a new job, a new part of my life three thousand miles away. She’s been silent since the alarm sounded a few hours ago. I make love to her. Not a quick fuck. Not anything other than reminding her how much we matter and how much she means to me.

I remind her we’re more.

Her sniffles as she pulls on a pair of jeans are killing me. I know this is important to her, and now that the day is here, she’s wondering if she should turn the job down and leave California with Duncan, Kelsey, and me. I told her yesterday, again this morning when we woke up, and even twenty minutes ago that this is important. I remind her of all the wonderful things she’s going to do and all of the amazing opportunities that are coming her way. I even conceded that she won’t be alone; Jackson is here.

Her mom has laid enough guilt on her, I don’t need to add to it. Her mom called me yesterday and begged me to bring her with me. She doesn’t know that if I managed that coup, Phoebe would be moving with me to New York.

I pull my suitcase from the bed and place it against the wall then wrap my arms around Phoebe’s waist. I nuzzle into her neck and place featherlight kisses to her skin. She shivers and I smile.

“Stop crying, baby. It’s two months. Eight weeks. If you give me a minute I’ll figure out how many hours. We’ll talk every day like we already do. And nothing could be hotter than phone sex and pictures. I promise to send you a dick pic every morning before I leave for work.”

Phoebe laughs and sniffles again before turning in my arms and lacing her hands behind my neck. “Promise?”

“I promise, I will not leave my apartment without first sending you a picture of my amazing and magical cock.”

“Shut up. I meant that we’ll be okay? I know I’ve been difficult, Mads. I’ve been drowning in my own shit and have sucked as a gir—” Phoebe is about to do the one thing she always says she won’t do, doesn’t need to do. Label us.

But, I cut her off with a kiss. She makes my fucking day. Hell, my whole damn life with finally defining our relationship. Labeling us. In retrospect, I should’ve let her say it.

A knock at the door startles Phoebe and causes her to break our kiss. Duncan reminds us we have five minutes until we need to leave. I pull Phoebe in for another kiss. Five minutes . . . I could give her one more orgasm, but when she woke me up this morning with her mouth wrapped around my dick, I sufficiently repaid her three times over. I think she’s good for the rest of the day.

“I meant to do something before I left, I should do that. Do you have Jackson’s number?”

My question must confuse Phoebe because she pulls back from my face confused.

“Of course, why?”

“I want to talk to him before I leave. Remind him that you are, in fact, taken but also to make sure he knows he’s responsible for you. If Dunc and I can’t be here, I need to know someone is keeping you safe. And as much as it kills me to say it, because I know he wants to get you in his bed, he’s the one for the job.”

Phoebe begins laughing. I’m not sure what she finds so funny; it’s the truth.

“It’s not funny.”

“Oh, yeah it is. Jackson is harmless. Besides, give me some credit. You know I’m not a cheater.”

I shrug, and she grabs my phone from my back pocket before tapping the screen intently. Once she’s done, she hands it back to me. I glance at the screen and laugh when I see what she’s put Jackson’s name under: Phoebe’s Personal Security.

“That’ll do. I’ll text him when I get to the airport. We should probably get going.”

Subdued, she nods and walks out the door. I follow, equally subdued.

The drive to the airport is quiet. Duncan and Kelsey know this is a difficult day for us. Kelsey asks a few questions about Phoebe coming home for dress fittings and to make sure she has the number of the wedding planner. Light conversation fills the time as we make our way up the winding mountain toward the airport.

Neither Phoebe nor I say much other than the occasional “yeah” to something Dunc or Kelsey say. Something Kelsey says to Phoebe reminds me of a conversation I overheard them having on the deck yesterday.

“I’m really bummed you aren’t coming with us, Phoebs.”

“I know but you know how excited I am for this job. Plus, I’ll see you in a few weeks for wedding stuff.”

I shouldn’t eavesdrop. It’s wrong, I know. I had a bad habit of this exact thing as a kid, listening to my sister talking to her friends. I learned when they think nobody is listening, girls talk. They share their most intimate secrets with their best friends. Guilt is eating at me, but I want to know we’re going to be okay. Phoebe has refused to discuss anything except each day, as it comes. I need to know I’m not making a mistake by moving to New York.

“And Mads?” Thanks, Kels for asking the big question.

“What about him? He’ll be great in his new job.”

“That’s not what I mean, and you know it. You still refuse to call him your boyfriend. We both know you are head over heels in love with that boy and him with you. Why won’t you just admit it?”

Phoebe doesn’t respond right away, and I grab the handle to move the slider open all the way. I want to tell her we don’t need a label. I don’t need her to call me her boyfriend. I know. But, before I make my presence known, she responds.

“I do. God, Kels, he’s everything. Why am I such an asshole?”

“You aren’t an asshole. You’re confused. For years you’ve insisted you hated Madsen. Then, you realized how close hate is to love and you fell for the poor bastard. I don’t even think Madsen cares about a title or whatever. He just wants to know you’re committed. That you love him.”

“I’ve told him I love him, Kels. It isn’t about that. It’s . . . trust and patience. That shit he pulled with Jackson. That wasn’t cool.”

“Are you kidding? Jackson has wanted in your pants since the day you stepped out of the car. I’m surprised Madsen didn’t pee on your leg to mark his territory sooner.”

I never made my presence known. I didn’t say anything to Phoebe. Kelsey was right. I don’t need a title or a big proclamation to the world. I just need to know where Phoebe stands and that she’s committed. That she believes we’re worth fighting for.

I look out the window and see planes taking off and realize we’re close to the airport. The reality of what is happening settles in. After what feels like seconds but is closer to thirty minutes, Duncan signals for the exit from the highway.

“Phoebs, Dad said to remind you about calling the bank tomorrow to confirm everything is settled for your car.”

“I’ll remember.” Her voice is sullen, and my heart is beating a mile a minute.

I wrap my fingers around her cheek, turning her to me. Her eyes meet mine, glossy and full of love. I swallow a lump in my throat. I lean down and tenderly kiss Phoebe; tears escape her eyes and I wipe them away.

“Okay kids, we’re here. Hopefully returning this car will be painless.” Duncan pulls up to the car rental place and we exit the car. In just a few minutes, Duncan finalizes the paperwork and the worker does his walk around the car. I catch him eyeing Phoebe a few times and suddenly getting on this plane seems like a horrible idea. As usual, she’s oblivious to how beautiful she is and how often men stare at her.

The shuttle ride to the terminal is quiet as Duncan tells tall tales of his surfing skills to the man next to him and Kelsey chatters on about her engagement and upcoming wedding to the man’s wife. Phoebe looks off in the distance through the window, and I hold her hand while laying my head back against the window. As the bus pulls up next to the curb, Phoebe pulls out her phone and taps the Uber icon. The bus comes to stop, the brakes squeaking loudly, and she takes a deep breath before standing. She walks ahead of me off the bus and waits by the curb as Duncan, Kelsey, and I wait for our bags to be placed on the sidewalk. Each of us take our bag and begin walking to the terminal. Phoebe holds my hand tightly and still says nothing. We checked in yesterday so all we have to do is check our bags at the counter. Phoebe stands next to me, but when the woman at the counter inquires as to her bags, Phoebe breaks free of my hand and runs away.

“Sorry about that. She’s not coming with us. Thank you for your help.” I turn and catch Duncan’s look as he nods my way in understanding. I find Phoebe over a way, against a wall. I walk up to her and pull her to me as she begins sobbing.

“Hey, it’s okay. Look at me, Phoebe.”

She shakes her head no as she buries her face in my bicep. I take a small step back and look at her, urging her gaze to meet mine as she fights it.

“It’s okay. I promise. Maybe you’ll hate California. I mean, who can really stand the perfect weather and nice people? Surely you’ll go insane and miss winter and beg for me to pick you up at the airport.”

“Maybe.” Sniffles and a runny nose don’t stop me from kissing her.

“I love you, Phoebe. Always. This is just a pit stop on our road to forever. Keep the faith. I’ll talk to you in a few hours when we change planes. I have to go, that security line is growing, and I only have forty-five minutes to get to my plane.”

“Okay.”

I kiss her again and make my way to the security line. For some reason, luck is on my side and TSA opens another line, making the wait far less than I originally thought. I’m only a few people from handing my ID and phone to the agent when I hear Phoebe shouting. She’s standing on a bench only a few feet from me.

“I love you, Madsen. Tell those women in New York you have a girlfriend!”

I smile and nod my head. She does it. She puts a label on it. She declares her love—publicly. She proves she knows we’re more. That we’re forever. We’ll make it.

Just a pit stop on our road.