Chapter EIGHT

 

 

David

 

THE BLOOD was rushing in my ears so loud that I felt Raymond’s presence more than I heard the door open. I didn’t even try to hide what I was doing. It hadn’t occurred to me that he might reject me or make a joke, or that he was only playing the game I’d initiated. It usually took several drinks to get me to this point, but a handful of words from Raymond, and I’d been a goner. He shredded every strand of my self-control, any sense of shame, with no effort at all.

And I wanted him to see me like this—pants shoved down with my hand running along my swollen cock. Insanely turned on because of him.

I met his eyes and swallowed heavily. He had no shirt on, his belt and fly hung open, and his hair was escaping the knot he had taken to wearing it in.

“This is your fault.” I stopped stroking myself and pressed my thumb against the sticky head of my dick. “For getting on Grindr at the same time as me.”

“It’s your fault for letting me test out my bi shit with you.” Raymond’s jeans slid down lower with each step, drooping down his thighs when he knelt at the edge of my bed. “And for being hot.”

I was close to shooting all over my stomach in front of him, but an explosion of butterflies tickled my stomach instead of the sharp ache of arousal. A breathless, nervous laugh tumbled out of me.

Raymond reached down to cup the bulge in his tight boxers. He wet his lips, eyes flicking between my face and my crotch, and scooted closer. “Don’t stop.”

“I have to or I’m going to come.”

“Fuck.” Raymond rubbed himself through his underwear. “What are we doing?”

“You’re the one experimenting. What do you want to do?”

My voice came out steady, almost calm, as though I didn’t want to beg him to touch me. Like I hadn’t been fantasizing about him coming into my room and putting his hands on me for the past month. Longer. Since the first time I saw him in person after spending over an hour on Facebook talking him into the meeting. I’d expected the dark eyes, strong jawline, and golden skin. I hadn’t expected all of the details that had made Raymond irresistible to me. His long, lean body, his messy hair, his smile.

Raymond tugged the band of my cotton pants, pulling them down lower. Inch after inch of my thighs were exposed to the warm air. He feasted on the sight, and I could tell he liked it. When they were nearly to the tops of my knees, his fingers dragged up to slide along my skin. I shuddered.

“What do you want, Raymond?”

“I want to watch you come.”

Make me come.

The words were almost out of my mouth, but I didn’t say them. Even with him caressing me and fucking me with his eyes, there was still a chance….

“C’mon….” Raymond rubbed his thumb against my hipbone. “I want to see your face when you bust.”

“Shit.”

It took no time. Thirty seconds of pumping my dick with our eyes locked, and I was shooting all over my torso, gasping and moaning with no regard for the volume of my voice. And he never looked away. He didn’t even jerk himself off. Just watched, seeming fascinated by the way my stomach sank and my chest heaved while I made a mess.

“Nice.”

I laughed again and dropped my hand to my side. It nudged my phone, sending it skittering over the side of the bed. Raymond’s fingers glided up higher, dragging through the spatter of semen. When he popped his fingers into his mouth, I couldn’t contain my gasp. “Oh God. You’re going to kill me.”

“This was your idea,” he pointed out. “And I like the taste.”

I wanted to know how he tasted. Every inch of him. But even with him doing what he wanted, I couldn’t find the courage to do the same. Not yet. So I just panted and gazed helplessly as he dipped his head down, hair curtaining his face, and licked me clean. I almost urged him to keep going, to kiss upward, press his lips to mine, but I didn’t. And as nice as it was to have the rough flat of his tongue mapping my stomach and chest, it just… wasn’t enough.

“Okay,” I said, voice wobbling. “My turn.”

Raymond licked his lips like a cat and hovered just over my face. The tease was more than I could take. I sat up and shoved him before flipping him over so he was on his back. He made no move to stop me when I yanked his jeans and boxers off. There wasn’t an ounce of modesty or shyness in his frame. Raymond knew how beautiful his body was—how impressive his thick, long cock was as it rested against his tight belly.

“Your turn to do what?” Raymond didn’t touch himself. “Watch me nut?”

“Yes.” I zeroed in on the damp, rounded tip of his dick. “Or… we can do something else.”

“Like what?”

“Anything. I’ll do anything you want.”

Raymond swallowed heavy enough for his Adam’s apple to bob, throat clicking. “I don’t know….”

“I could suck your dick, eat your ass—”

“Jesus, David!”

“—or play with it. Massage your p-spot.” Another trickle of liquid spilled from Raymond’s slit. I almost leaned in to lick it but stopped myself. He had to choose. I wouldn’t force anything on him. Who knew what would happen if you startled a semistraight boy? He was already looking skittish with his fingers plucking the sheet, his breathing becoming erratic. “You said you wanted to try that, didn’t you?”

“Yeah….”

“It will be fun.” I rubbed his knee, his thigh, pressed my thumb along his scrotum. He jumped, and I cupped the sac. “Shh,” I soothed. “Don’t get scared.”

“I’m not scared of shit.”

“You’re all tense,” I said, tone light, airy, nonchalant. Like we could stop and it would be all the same to me. “We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to. This is for you. If you don’t want to try….”

“I do.” Raymond curled his hand around his shaft. “I’m horny, man. I need something.”

“Okay. Just don’t get weird on me if you don’t like it….”

“Stop talking and do it.”

I grinned at his impatience and pulled up my own pants so they weren’t constricting my movement. I knelt between his thighs the way he had just done with me and hooked my hands under his knees to push them back and up. “Put your hands here.”

Raymond arched his back, following my instructions and bringing his knees up toward his chest. His head dropped to my pillows as he held his thighs open with his knees in the air; dick, balls, and ass presented to me in a way that made me want to take a picture for later. He may have picked jock as one of his Grindr tribes, but Raymond’s body was so smooth and hairless that he looked more like a twink. A twink who would knock your teeth out if you called him one.

“You’re such a pretty boy.”

Raymond snorted and pushed my shoulder with one of his dangling feet. “Shut up and get me off.”

“Yes, sir.”

I leaned over him, our faces inches apart, and jerked open my bedside table. My hands were shaking, but I forced them still and tried hard not to look so eager and nervous with us so close. I concentrated on finding my tube of Wet, ignored the case holding my dildo, and nearly had a heart attack when his lips grazed my throat.

I froze, eyes jerking over to meet his. “Don’t,” I blurted.

Confusion flashed in his expression, but he only said, “Hurry up.”

Sitting back on my haunches, I uncapped the tube and dribbled lube over his dick and the seam of his ass. He hissed but didn’t alter his position. Ray’s obedience gave me a little thrill. Despite having just spurted everywhere, my dick twitched. It was like I was seventeen again. Even more so because I was salivating over giving a guy a hand job. That’s how I started—rubbing the thick gel over his dick, gripping it hard to relax him. He moaned softly and I answered the sound with one of my own. I couldn’t help it. He was glorious.

Inching closer, I slid my other hand over the back of his thigh and down. I massaged his crack and then his hole with the pads of my fingers. The lube smeared everywhere, coating my entire hand. I hesitated for a moment before I slid my index finger into his ass up to the knuckle. It clenched up around me, immediately trying to reject the probing digit.

“Relax,” I whispered. “It’s fine.”

“It feels weird.” Raymond’s breath came out in harsh bursts. “J-just keep touching my dick while you do it.”

“Are you sure?” I slid my finger in deeper, pulled it out, and repeated the motion. All the while, I pumped his dick, the lube helping my hand glide over it with ease. “I can stop.”

“No, don’t,” he gritted out. “Just shut the hell up.”

I smirked and fingered him faster, still twisting my hand around his shaft. He made a muffled sound, and I realized he was biting his lip. This could be my once-in-a-lifetime chance to touch him, and it wasn’t going to be spent with him silent and pretending he wasn’t going nuts. If he got to watch my expression when I came, I wanted to hear his dirty mouth. After those messages, I knew he had one.

I added another finger and curved them up, thrusting them inside with savage force until a cry tore out of him. I didn’t stop, even when his toes curled and he arched his back. Even when I felt his dick throbbing in my hand, the blood surging as his sac tightened up to press against my hand.

“Oh shit,” Raymond gasped.

“Good?” I could barely hear my own voice. It was buried beneath the wet, sloppy side of my lube-covered fingers plunging in and out of his ass, and my other hand blurring over his dick. “You want more?”

“Yes!” Raymond gripped the underside of his knees so hard that the skin whitened around his fingers. “Like that—oh fuck, right there,” he said raggedly.

I added a finger, half of my hand in his ass, and tormented his prostate without mercy. The illusion of being able to keep quiet shattered, and the sounds Raymond made had me feeling on the very precipice of control. My mouth hung open, my throat dry.

“Fuck me.” The words burst from Raymond’s lips. “Make me come.”

If he came, it was over. He’d collapse against the bed, laugh, and marvel at how fun it had been. Go try it with someone else.

Both of my hands slowed despite the frustrated growl he emitted, and when I felt his body snapping up to meet my ministrations as though he were on the edge of peaking, I pulled away.

“Wha—” Raymond’s voice was lost, ruined, and the effect was emphasized by the way his toes curled again. He released his knees and stared at me, incredulous. “What—why?”

“Not yet.”

“Wha—”

“Shh….” I rubbed his balls, squeezing gently, and watched his eyes roll back in his head. Every muscle in his body was coiled tight, and I memorized each line and vein, the V shape of his torso, and the way his dick was dribbling. My mouth watered. “You’ll get off… eventually.”

“Event—” Raymond broke off with a faint whimper when I ran my finger along the underside of his dick. I did it again, massaging the veins there and then teasing the crown. “God, David, why are you doing this to me?”

“Because it’s entertaining.”

Raymond’s head snapped up. His eyes flashed. “Don’t f—”

I cut him off by replacing my finger with my tongue, and a strangled sound slipped from him. His fists balled up again. Driving him insane was fun, but I felt close to losing it myself. The taste of him and the heady smell of his musk washed over me until the tremor returned to my hands. I engulfed the head of his cock with my mouth, and the shaking worsened. I refound my calm center by shoving my fingers back into his ass. Raymond spread his legs eagerly, riding my hand while I sucked his dick.

It was a mess. I couldn’t focus—couldn’t look up and tease and smile around the girth of him. The calm was a facade that cracked with spiderwebbing slivers every time he made one of those vulnerable, broken sounds. They got louder as his urgency heightened. He began to hump my face as I plowed his ass with my fingers, but I evaded just as he started to snatch a handful of my hair.

“No.” The word came out in a pained whine the second time I pulled away. “You can’t—I can’t….”

The words were stammered out and tangled, nonsensical and desperate. By now, Raymond was shaking. He clawed at the bed, arching up into the air, and he was practically sobbing with the need for release. But he didn’t touch himself. He wanted me to do it. The reality was a little stunning, and I was having trouble thinking straight. I sighed and rubbed my face against his dick, mouthing at it, but not giving him the pressure he needed to burst.

“You’re gonna make me insane,” he choked out.

I kissed the base of his dick, his scrotum and then tongued his taint. I wanted to slide my tongue into his ass and taste every part of him, but freaking him out and ruining the perfection of him sweaty and undulating on the bed was not worth the risk. Instead, I wrapped my lips around the tip of his cock and redoubled my efforts with his ass. I fucked him as deep as I could go, ripped higher-pitched cries out of him, and I could taste the salty tang of his precome.

My goal was to make him burst from the pressure of my fingers against his prostate, or just to explode from all of the teasing, but I couldn’t keep away from his dick. I took it in my mouth again and sank low until my lips skimmed his groin and the head of his cock hit the back of my throat. Raymond’s fingers immediately tangled in my hair.

“Suck it.” He thrust deeper, gagging me. I responded by punching into his ass harder. “Fuck yeah, baby. Just like that….”

My world narrowed to the feel of him filling my mouth, the drool pooling off the sides of my lips as he choked me with each flex of his hips, and the muscles in his ass clamping down around my fingers. I grew lightheaded from the brutal fucking my mouth was taking, but I didn’t pull away until he stiffened. I wanted to see his face as he gushed.

And Jesus, did he gush.

Raymond’s mouth gaped, his eyes squeezing shut, his body shaking with the force of his release. I only let him go once the last stream of semen had drained from his dick. He shivered, peering up at me from beneath damp eyelashes. He was wrecked, and I couldn’t hide my triumphant grin.

“You’re a horrible person,” he croaked. “Goddamn.”

“You loved it.”

“You’re a tease.”

I wiped my sticky hand on the sheet and didn’t deny it. It was difficult to think of something witty to say with him naked and spent on my bed. He looked comfortable, like he belonged there. And I was convinced that he did. It felt right for him to be so at ease while sprawled beneath me with his elegant limbs slack and boneless. It felt right for him to be with me in general.

“Was it good, though?”

“Mmm.” Raymond propped himself up on his elbows, looking down at his chest. “Can’t you tell? I haven’t blown a load that large since I got my first blowjob.”

“You’re just hard up for it.” I grabbed a crumpled T-shirt from the floor and used it to mop up his chest and stomach. Even his hair was slightly damp. “When’s the last time you had sex?”

“I don’t know. A month or two?”

Raymond collapsed onto the bed again and closed his eyes. With one hand, he felt around for his underwear, but he was nowhere close. I swiped them from the floor, but regretted it when he shimmied into them and covered his still-swollen dick. It would have been nice to twine with him naked beneath the ceiling fan with the room humid from our sweat.

My first instinct was to stretch out beside him and cuddle, but I hesitated. Would it be too much like I was getting mushy? Would it give him the wrong idea and scare him off experimenting in the future? I would do anything to avoid that. Next time, I wanted him to experiment with how deep he could shove his dick into my ass.

“Wake up!”

Snapping out of my daze, I met his eyes. “Sorry.”

Raymond frowned slightly before jerking me down to sprawl beside him. I smiled. Maybe a little cuddle session wouldn’t freak him out after all. I wound my arm around his waist and laid my cheek against his chest. His hand found its way into my hair, and when he started to run his fingers through it, I tried not to read too much into it. We always did this. He knew I was a clinger, and he’d adapted accordingly. Or it was postorgasmic affection—a natural response after coming so hard his eyes had teared.

I repeated these things even as my eyelids grew heavy from the combination of the hot room, his warmth, and the syrupy contentment seeping into my body. I couldn’t start thinking this meant anything more than what it had started as. But I knew myself, and I knew it was possible that thoughts encouraged by wishful thinking and overanalyzing would trick me into believing this was more.

“Want me to go to my room?”

“No.” I hugged him tighter. “Not yet. I’ve missed you.”

Raymond scoffed softly. “You act like I was in a different country. We were in the same apartment the whole time.”

“I know, but we weren’t talking. I was afraid that—” I chanced a look up at him. His eyes were closed. “I thought maybe you regretted moving in with me.”

“You’re so extra.”

“I am not! You acted like you didn’t want to be around me.”

“I like being around you, or I wouldn’t have moved in. I was just angry because of what you said to your little friends.”

“You sure seemed to like at least one of my little friends.”

If Raymond picked up on the thread of resentment in my voice, he didn’t comment on it. He kept stroking my hair, and the slow, methodical way his fingers moved through the strands was putting me to sleep. I struggled to keep my eyes open.

“If it wasn’t for Oli or Oliver or whatever he calls himself, I’d have never found your ass on Grindr. And what the hell were you doing on there anyway? Were you seriously going to find some random dude to come over and bang you?”

“Maybe.”

“Have you done it before?”

“Yeah. Or I meet them somewhere.”

“Like behind a bush in the park?”

I snickered at the disapproving tone in his voice. For someone who thrived on being as brash as possible, Raymond was surprisingly conservative about certain things. From drinking to partying to casual sex. But then again, he’d always made fuck buddies out of people he’d known for years. The world of Grindr and Craigslist hookups was foreign to him. I wondered if he thought it was creepy, or if I was fulfilling some kind of stereotype about gay men that straight people still perpetuated. I doubted it. Me finding a piece of ass on Grindr was no different than a straight guy picking up a woman at a club. Grindr users just didn’t waste time with niceties and buying drinks first.

“I don’t have public sex, thank you. And you’re making it sound like I live my life on Grindr! I can count the number of guys I’ve met on one hand.”

Raymond grunted, seemingly mollified. Maybe he truly thought I was in danger of being abducted by some guy I met on the app. I had never shared the concern, because I’d mostly used it for sexting or phone sex when I had no outlet for my sexual frustration.

“Isn’t that why your ex dumped you?”

Startled, I hazarded another look at him. Sometimes it was like he could read my damned mind.

“Um, yeah. The third and last time we split ways. I was chatting with some guy, and we moved it to Skype. I went to the bathroom to jerk off, and Caleb walked in.”

“He dumped you over masturbating on Skype?” Raymond seemed to find it amusing. “I’m not the big expert on relationships, but I can’t image Michael moving out of Nunzio’s apartment over some Skype sex. I mean he’d be pissed but… leave? Nah. Some people just get off on that type of shit.”

“Me and Caleb didn’t have the type of relationship that Michael and Nunzio do.”

“Why not?”

“Because….” I had tried to have this conversation with so many of my friends that by now, it felt rehearsed. Both Karen and Oli had never understood my dissatisfaction with Caleb, and every time I had tried to give examples of the flaws in our struggling relationship, I came off looking like an ass. An idealistic ass with a head full of romance novel plotlines and happily-ever-afters. It didn’t help that I’d behaved like a complete douche bag by the end. “When you see them together, there is no denying that what they have is real. You can’t fake or force that kind of passion. They’re just… in love. Made for each other. That type of thing.”

Raymond nodded.

“But me and Caleb just fell together because of circumstances, you know? We met, we’re both attractive and successful, it made sense to start dating. And when we dated for a while, it made sense to move in together. We were a perfect gay power couple living in a gayborhood. It was very Neil Patrick Harris and David Burtka.”

“I dunno who those people are.”

I smirked and brushed my lips to his chest. Raymond’s fingers clenched in my hair before relaxing again.

“The guy from How I Met Your Mo—doesn’t matter. The point is, we made sense together, so we stayed together even though our relationship was as passionate and exciting as a piece of dry toast. And I got bored. But that sounds superficial and childish so….”

“No, it doesn’t. What’s the point of being together if you don’t want to bang him? You could just be friends and still be all powerful gays in the city or whatever.”

Of course Raymond would be the only one to get it. Of course. As if my infatuation needed any further bolstering.

“Yes, well, tell that to my friends. And my brain. We always end up getting back together because I think I made a mistake by ruining a relationship with so much potential.”

“Potential for what?”

“To be… good in the long term? For the future? He’s completely set up. He’s also reliable and smart. Handsome. Etcetera. It just doesn’t feel the way I thought love would feel, so I ended up straying. I’m horrible.”

“Yeah.” Raymond laughed when I elbowed him in the side. “Just don’t get back with him, and you won’t be left feeling like a cheating piece of shit. Simple.”

It should have been simple, but it wasn’t.

I thudded my head against his chest and stared down the length of his body. Giving in to my temptation, I traced the line of his abs. For as little as he tended to himself, and for as hard as his body was, his skin was silky smooth.

“So… are you going to start using Grindr? It seems like you’re judging it, so I’m going to assume not.”

“I haven’t decided yet.”

There was a little twist in my gut. Warning signs popped up in my head screaming Danger! Danger! My jealous streak ran long and wide and was strong enough to decimate small villages.

“Don’t rush into anything if you don’t want to.”

“I won’t.” Raymond stretched and said through a yawn, “But at least now I have some practice.”

“Yeah….”

And I was just ecstatic about having contributed to him potentially hooking up with other men.

Not.