AGREEING TO GO to lunch with Sadie during my break had been a bad idea.
Possibly the worst decision I’d ever made in my entire life.
Okay, so maybe I was being a bit—or a lot—melodramatic, but the girl was getting on my last nerve. I wished I had Mia here as a buffer, but since I was working today she was at her baby sitter’s house.
“So, you and Hayes?” She waggled her brows. “What’s going on there? It seemed like there was a little somethin’, somethin’ going on at his party.”
I rolled my eyes. “What you sensed was merely my irritation at being in the same room with him.”
She picked up her glass of water, glaring at me across the rim. “Arden, everybody could see your lady boner from a mile away.”
I choked on the bite of food in my mouth.
While I was hacking away and trying not to die Sadie sat there calmly.
I gulped greedily at my water and once I had myself composed I glared at my so-called friend. “Lady boner? Really?”
“Hey,” her hands rose innocently, “I call it like I see it. Lady. Boner.”
I narrowed my eyes further. “You know how mad you got when Emma kept asking you endless questions about you and Ezra?” I waited for her to nod. “Well that’s exactly what you’re doing to me. It’s annoying. Quit it.”
Her face fell. “You’re right. I’m so sorry. I’ll stop, I swear…but for the record, I’m totally one hundred percent rooting for you guys to be a couple.”
I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. “I agreed to go on a date with him,” I admitted.
Sadie lit up, clapping her hands together in glee.
“But I only agreed to one date.” I held up one finger, wiggling it around to drive home my point. “No more.”
“Oh there will be more!” She did a little dance in her seat. “You’ll see.”
“I don’t know what he sees in me anyway,” I mumbled. “Didn’t he go on a date with you this past summer? I mean, I’m nothing like you.”
“It was one time.” She stared me down as she ripped her straw wrapper into tiny pieces. “And yeah, we don’t have chemistry—and let’s face it I was madly in love with Ezra even then and I was too blind to see it—but that one date was enough to tell me that he’s a genuinely nice guy.” Worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, she admitted, “He told me that he was ready to settle down, and to be honest I didn’t quite believe him at first, but I can tell now that he wasn’t lying. He hasn’t been going out and partying, or bringing around random play things.”
“Really?” My brows rose in interest.
She nodded. “I know you think that he might grow bored with you, or that it would only be about sex, but need I remind you that you already slept with him and the boy’s still pursuing you relentlessly. Cut the guy some slack.”
“My life is complicated,” I mumbled.
Sadie snorted and shook her head like I was beyond silly. “Everyone’s life is complicated in different ways. That’s a pathetic excuse and you know it.”
My face crumbling, I admitted, “I’m scared. What if I let him in and he leaves? What if he hurts me? I’ve been through so much already and…I honestly don’t know if I’m strong enough to go through it again.”
Sadie softened, her shoulders slumping. “Oh, Arden.” She reached for my hand that rested on the table. “I know things were rough with your ex, but you can’t base every guy off of him.” I hastily looked away from the pity in her eyes. The last thing I ever wanted was for someone to feel sorry for me. “You can’t lock your heart away forever, that’s only letting the bastard win.”
I sighed and my eyes dropped to my plate of food. “You’re right,” I agreed.
And she was, but it felt like it would be impossible for me to let go of four years of hatred and fear. I had to try though, because like she said, I couldn’t let Todd win.
Braving the throngs of the grocery store with a tired three-year-old was not my idea of a good time. But I hadn’t had time to stop off before picking her up and we were out of a few things.
“Momma, I wanna go home,” she whined, crocodile tears streaking her cheeks.
“I know baby girl.” I pulled in a lungful of air, trying to stay calm.
I loved being a mom, don’t get me wrong, but it was moments like these that tested the limits of my sanity.
Wiping away her tears I stopped on the cereal aisle. “If you’re a good girl I’ll get you those popsicles you like.”
Instantly, the tears stopped.
Yes, I’d stooped to bribery, but what parent didn’t?
“Really?” She asked, her bottom lip jutting out.
I nodded. “But you have to stop whining, okay?”
“O’tay,” she said around some final sniffles.
I grabbed the cereal I needed and then consulted my list before heading to another aisle.
“Coffee, peanut butter, and macaroni.” I read the words softly to myself and steered the cart down the pasta aisle.
I grabbed the family pack of Kraft mac n’ cheese and dropped it into the shopping cart.
“Momma,” Mia hissed, grabbing my shirt.
“What?” I looked down at her, confused by her odd behavior.
With her other hand she waved me forward.
I lowered and her small hands grabbed my face, holding me close so that she could whisper in my ear. “Dat man keeps watching us.”
“What man?” I whispered back.
She pointed over my shoulder.
I pulled back a bit and kissed the top of her head. If someone was watching us the last thing I wanted to do was clue them into that I knew. Although, Mia pointing probably gave it away.
I turned slightly and peeked behind me but the aisle was empty.
“He left,” she announced softly.
I smoothed my fingers through her hair. “Tell me if you see him again.”
She nodded.
I grabbed the last of the items I needed, including Mia’s popsicles, and headed to the check out.
I was still on edge from Mia’s words, the little hairs on the back of my neck standing up straight. I wanted to pretend it was nothing, but Mia wasn’t the kind of child to make something like that up. If she said someone was watching us then they were.
I stepped into line and began unloading my groceries onto the conveyer belt.
“Fancy running into you here.”
“Ah!” I jumped and turned around, clasping a hand over my heart. “You scared me!” I scolded.
“Sorry.” Hayes smiled sheepishly and gave a small shrug.
“Why are you here?” I asked as I pushed the cart forward.
“Well…this is a grocery store. I needed food…you know, in order to keep living and all. As well as toilet paper.” He proudly held up the plastic wrapped rolls. “I remember, mentioning that to you last night. Oh, and we can’t forget that I had to reimburse poor Barbara for her delicious cake.”
“I forgot about Barbara,” I muttered.
He shook his head, his lips turned down in a frown. “How could you possibly forget Barbara? She gifted us with the most delicious cake to ever pass through our lips…although, calling it a gift is kind of a stretch since I stole it. Does it count as stealing if you didn’t intend to steal it?”
Uh…”
“Never mind,” he waved his hand in dismissal, “and in case you were wondering, I got Barbara a gift card to make up for eating her cake.”
“How generous of you,” I commented as the checker began to scan my items.
“I like to think of myself as a very giving guy.” Hayes mused. “Especially when it comes to the pleasure of a certain red head.” He stared at me with hooded eyes and my body heated all over.
“You don’t play fair,” I accused.
“I told you I wasn’t going to.”
“Ma’am?” The checker called to get my attention.
I looked and saw all my stuff bagged and waiting.
“Oh, sorry.” I jumped into action, swiping my credit card and loading the bags into the cart.
The cashier handed me my receipt and I started to push the cart towards the doors, wanting to get out of there as fast as I could.
“Hey, Arden?”
I was forced to turn around at the sound of Hayes’ voice.
“Yeah.” I paused, waiting for him to speak.
“I’ll see you later.”
“Oh, right…of course.”
Still scattered, thanks to his sudden appearance, I hurried to the doors.
I loaded the groceries into the car and buckled Mia into her car seat.
As I was backing out, it finally occurred to me to ask her if Hayes had been the man she saw.
“No, momma,” she giggled, “I know Hayes.”
“So, Hayes wasn’t the one watching us?” I confirmed.
“No, swilly.”
I swallowed past the lump in my throat as fear slid like a slimy serpent through my veins.
I prayed silently that it was nothing, but my gut told me otherwise.