Declan sat in his bed, steadily looking up at the ceiling. Maria had not returned which he took as a good sign, but still, the loneliness was getting to him more than usual these days. He wanted nothing more than to have Noelle laying in his arms, her body pressed against his, just to remind him that although he may not be a wolf, he was still very much alive.

He looked out the window and the blackness of the night sky still stretched its tired arms, shadowing the entire city. He needed to sleep, but he couldn’t find peace enough to rest. He closed his eyes and tried to count sheep, just as his mother had taught him when he was boy. And when he was having nightmares about his father.

He was at twenty-six when he heard a soft knock coming from the other side of his door. He opened his eyes, and there (standing in the doorway of his room) was Noelle. He sat up quickly and rubbed at his eyes to be certain he wasn’t imagining her, but she was still standing there, looking at him when his vision focused again.

“Noelle?” Declan called out quietly.

She started walking toward him without responding, and Declan started to get nervous. Why wasn’t she saying anything?

When she got closer to him, he was finally able to make out her features, and in her eyes, Declan saw tears sitting on the brim, waiting patiently for her lids to send them traveling down her face. She held out a small bottle to him and Declan reached for it slowly. His fingers brushed over hers and he felt a familiar rush of heat course through his body.

“This is for Maria,” Noelle said finally. And as though those three words sucked out all the energy she had left, she collapsed onto the bed and broke down in tears.

“Noelle?” Declan placed the bottle carefully on his nightstand and then turned his attention to her. “What happened? Why are you so upset?”

“Nothing is easy anymore, Declan,” she said between sobs. “No matter what decision you make, you hurt someone you love, or you lose them. Is this what life is supposed to be all about? Just always dealing with grief and loss, and shitty, fucked up dilemmas?”

“No, Noelle, no.” Declan stroked her hair softly, hoping that she would be able to calm down enough to tell him where she had been and how she was able to get the cure. “Life isn’t about that, it’s about learning to recognize the good moments, those times of joy and peace —those are the moments that we cling to during shitty, fucked up dilemmas. It’s the only way we make it through.”

Noelle looked up at Declan and rubbed her eyes, wiping away the tears. She was still struggling, trying to catch her breath when Declan leaned in toward her, kissing her softly. She pulled back briefly and looked at him —this beautiful man who had helped her with so much and who loved her, despite everything she’d done to prove that she didn’t deserve his love. She leaned toward him and pressed her lips against his, firmly. Her tongue teased his lips open and they explored each other’s mouths without hesitation.

Declan reached for his own shirt and pulled it off, over his head. The way that Noelle was kissing him told him that she was in no mood to take things slow today, and to be honest, neither was he. He reached under her shirt and unclasped her bra deftly, with one hand. She removed the straps without taking off her shirt and slid the bra out from underneath —her nipples rubbed against the soft fabric of her shirt. Declan cupped a breast and put his mouth around it, flicking tenderly at her nipple until it stood out from her skin.

Noelle moaned in pleasure as she ran her fingers down his bare skin. Declan trailed kisses down her stomach to the waistband of her pants and unbuttoned them quickly, pulling down the zipper simultaneously. He stood up from the bed and pushed her to lie down. In one swift pull, he removed her pants and threw them to the ground.

There was a knocking sound and Declan looked around the room and then at Noelle. “Did you hear that?” he asked.

Noelle nodded and propped herself up on her elbows. Declan walked to the window of his bedroom and peered outside, but he didn’t notice anyone there. He went to the front door of his apartment and looked through the peep hole, but saw nothing.

As he walked back into the bedroom, he found Noelle lying there, completely naked. He quickly forgot about what he was looking for in the first place.

Declan climbed onto the bed on all fours and he pushed Noelle’s legs apart with his nose. He leaned down further and brought his face to her sweet place between her thighs. His hot breath against her skin sent shivers all over her body and she had to try not to push his face against her.

Declan didn’t let the anticipation drag on a moment longer —he licked her skin softly and let his tongue travel all over the folds of her skin until it landed on her sweet spot. There, he flicked his tongue voraciously as his fingers went inside of her, pushing in and out. Noelle arched her back and moaned loudly, gripping the back of his head and pressing it closer to her body.

Declan could feel her building up and the muscles tightened around his fingers. He closed his eyes and focused on his rhythm, willing her to finish for him. As though she heard his secret desires, Noelle exploded all over his fingers and Declan moved his tongue expertly around her.

Declan quickly removed his own pants, and without any hesitation, he plunged inside of her. But Noelle had another idea —she moved her body so that she was on her knees with her chest to the bed and her head to the side. Declan smiled at her and moved behind her, caressing her skin softly before reinserting himself inside. He grabbed her hips and pushed himself in and out of her wetness. He could hear her moans and it only made him harder.

Declan leaned forward and grabbed each of her breasts with his hands, fondling them. He continued to rock his hips against hers. He could feel everything building up inside of him and he knew that he was about to finish. He leaned back and grabbed hold of her hips once more, thrusting himself inside of her, until finally, all the pressure was released.

Declan slowly removed himself and laid back on the bed while Noelle quickly stood and walked over to the bathroom. Declan welcomed the familiar sensation of euphoria wafting over him, but when he looked over at the nightstand, he was quickly reminded of the conversation which he needed to have with Noelle.

She emerged from the bathroom moments later and sat down on the bed next to Declan, resting her head against his chest. “You are the only thing that makes sense to me anymore,” Noelle whispered.

Declan clenched his eyes shut —he wanted to give in to her and to this moment. He did not want reality to come invading in as it always did. Instinctively, he knew that they were running out of time and he needed the truth from her. He pulled away from her slightly, and looked down at her peaceful face.

“Noelle, we really need to talk.”

Noelle picked up her head and opened her eyes to look at Declan. She took in his worried expression and sighed as though she knew this conversation would not go anywhere good.

“I know we do,” she said, pulling herself up so that she sat crisscross in front of Declan. Suddenly aware of her nudity, she pulled the covers from the bed and folded them over herself to offer some sort of shield.

Declan picked up the bottle from the nightstand and looked at the clear liquid sloshing around inside. “Let’s start with this,” he said quietly. “How did you get it?”

“When I left your apartment the day that Maria came here, I went to see my parents as we had discussed. Only when I got there, I found them packing their things, and they told me that the council rebels had offered them the cure to be human again. They decided to take it.” Noelle looked down at her hands as she told the rest of the story. “I went with them because I knew that Edmund would be the only chance to get this cure for Maria.”

“So, you saw him then?” Declan asked, a hint of jealousy creeping into his voice.

“Yes,” Noelle said quietly. “And I met the rest of the council rebels as well. They —they found Megan’s family, Declan.” Declan raised his eyebrows at this, but he made no comment. “They found her family and the reason no one else could track them down was because werewolves…”

Noelle trailed off as she remembered the picture of the young girl laying the ground. It was at this moment, that she remembered the photo she saw next —Declan’s father laying on the street, his head ripped off clean, detached from the rest of his body.

“What is it, Noelle?” Declan asked as he took in Noelle’s change.

“Declan, your —your father was killed by werewolves, too.”

Declan studied Noelle’s expression carefully. He had never told her much about his father at all, and he certainly never told her about Dustin’s method of ridding their family of such a cruel man. Which meant that these “rebels,” as Noelle referred to them, had a frightening way of being able to get their information.

“I know that’s what happened,” Declan admitted. Noelle’s head shot up and she stared at him with wide eyes, her mouth agape. “Noelle, my father —he was a very bad man. He hurt my mother and I, and…” Declan trailed off as he remembered finding his mother on the bathroom floor, bleeding through her hands. “It was Dustin who did it, Noelle. He saved my mother. He saved me.”

Noelle’s head swirled with this new information. What had been such a shock to her, Declan had already known about. And, he seemed fine with it, more than that, he seemed genuinely at peace with what had happened.

“Declan, I don’t know what to say.”

Noelle pulled the covers up tightly around her, as though she was trying to create a barrier. If anything else happened, or was said, she was certain that she would fall apart.

“They gave me these files —I mean boxes, huge boxes. All with envelopes inside, and with pictures of innocent people who had been murdered by wolves. I mean, Megan’s sisters —her parents, I don’t even know what to think about all of this.”

“Noelle, not all werewolves choose that life. Dustin’s pack did not feed on humans. He killed my father and that was the only human he ever hurt, and believe me when I say it was for good reason.” Declan reached out his hand toward Noelle, but she pulled back reflexively. He let his hand fall between them. “Let’s go back to your time with the council rebels then,” Declan said. He coughed nervously as he approached the question that he needed to ask, but that, he wanted to leave unasked altogether. “Maria thinks that you were the one who led them to her pack. They need your blood to make the cure, and you just happened to become a female alpha. And then the day after we leave their camp, and they tell us their plans of escaping, they are attacked and massacred.”

Noelle studied Declan as he spoke —this was it… her breaking point. She could feel her brain clicking off. “And you agree with that theory?” Noelle said emotionlessly.

“I don’t know what to believe anymore,” Declan said as he ran his hands through his hair. “I asked you for your help and then I turn around and you’ve gone MIA, not answering my calls or texts.”

Noelle nodded as she pursed her lips together. “And the cure that I brought? Is that not an indication to you of what I was doing during my time away from you?”

Declan looked at the bottle on the bed which sat between them and then back at Noelle. “How can I know for certain that this is the right cure for her?”

Noelle slowly pushed the covers from her body and stood up from the bed. She walked to the side of the bed where her clothes laid crumpled up on the floor. She got dressed slowly while Declan watched, saying nothing.

Once her clothes were on, she pulled back her hair and tied it into a messy bun on the top of her head. She looked at Declan; her eyes dead. She made her way to the door and pulled it open, the light came spiraling in and landed on Declan like a spotlight. She left the room and crossed the apartment.

Declan still sat on the bed, motionless, as he listened to the front door of his apartment slamming shut.

* * *

Edmund waited patiently in the chair in the main room for the door to open. He had wanted to go with Noelle, but since she refused, he had one of the others follow her to make sure she was unharmed. It was taking much longer than he expected, and he was beginning to worry.

The door to the room creaked slightly as it was pushed open. Edmund stood from his seat and walked forward to greet the man. “How did it go, Thomas?” Edmund asked eagerly. “Was she able to go unnoticed?”

“I wouldn’t say that exactly,” the man said, a peculiar expression on his face.

“What do you mean?”

“She went to the apartments, as you said, and I followed her from a distance as she went to the basement. She came back moments later carrying something in her hands. Then, I watched as she went upstairs and went inside of an apartment. I expected her to leave quickly as per your explanation, correct? She was supposed to leave it inside the room and then leave. But, she stayed inside for a while, so I began to think something bad had happened.”

Edmund started pacing back and forth, his mind already coming up with a plethora of scenarios, which all resulted in this man telling Edmund that Noelle had been caught, or worse… killed.

“I went around to the side of the apartment and I was able to climb up a tree and look into the window of the apartment she went into.”

“And?” Edmund asked, losing his patience. “What did you see? Was she hurt?”

“Sir,” the man said, and then coughed uncomfortably. “She was engaged in some —what I mean to say is…”

“Spit it out!”

“She was having sex! And, it didn’t seem forced at all, if you know what I mean.”

Thomas covered his mouth as though he was trying to catch the words in midair, and trap them again before Edmund could register them. But the thing with words was, once they were said, they could never be unsaid.

Edmund stared at the man as if he was frozen in time. His eyes blinking, were the only indication he was still mobile. “What did you just say?” Edmund whispered.

“Sir, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said…”

“Did you see the man?” Edmund asked, his face getting hot with anger.

“Yes, I did. He looked outside because the branch had tapped against his window, but he did not see me.”

“What did he look like?” Edmund asked. But it wasn’t a question that he needed answered, because he already knew the truth.

Thomas continued to provide Edmund a detailed profile of the man, but Edmund had stopped listening. All he could hear was Noelle’s voice in his head promising him that her relationship with Declan was done. All he could hear were Noelle’s lies.

He held up his hand to stop Thomas from speaking, and with one flick of his palm, the young man was dismissed from the room.

So, she had gone back to get the cure for a werewolf friend, and then she had gone back to make love to her werewolf lover. Edmund realized that Noelle would never be able to choose to be on their side. And if she wasn’t on their side, then she was a threat.

“And he knew that all threats must be neutralized.”