The fan had been on.

When I woke up during the night, I knew why his side of the bed was empty. It hadn’t made me mad, but it frustrated me. He only turned the fan on when he needed to sneak out for the crew. It wasn’t Bren. She was different. She was precious, but his crew… That was a different story.

Three days passed before he texted me.

Three days after I’d snuck out, while he slept. Both of us knew I was frustrated, but for three days neither had reached out to the other.

I was in my office at Manny’s, looking at my phone, when his text popped up.

Channing: How are you?

That’s what he asked, but we all knew what he wanted.

It was code for: are you still mad at me? I know why you’re mad. You know why you’re mad, but I miss you. And follow that up with: I miss you and I’m scared of emotional talks, so let’s have sex. I can feel close to you that way. So, is the coast clear?

If he had texted the very next day, I would’ve ignored with ease. But this was day three.

Day three and I was missing him too. He was my best friend. How could I not?

I should’ve deleted the text, but dammit.

Three stupid days, and I was surrendering.

I was spineless. That’s what I was.

Letting out a curse, I called Samantha. She’d been my other best friend since my Fallen Crest glory days. I needed strength not to text Channing back. I hoped she’d give it to me, but when she answered, the moment her face popped up on my phone’s screen I knew I was in trouble. Black hair, almond eyes, a stunningly beautiful face, and she was glowing. I’m sure it was the light behind her, but there was a damn halo around her head.

I sighed. “You’re actually glowing.”

She laughed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. “Don’t tell Mason. He thinks I’m miserable, and he’s going overboard with making sure I have all the food he can think of. We have one freezer full of cookie dough ice cream and a fridge drawer of just pickles.”

Samantha was pregnant, and while I loved her dearly, her happiness was like a fist being forced down my throat. It got all the way to my stomach, grabbed hold, and yanked.

I blinked back sudden tears.

I hated those things, but fuck it. She was happy. She was pregnant. She was loved.

My reason for calling didn’t seem so important now, “How are you?” I asked instead.

Everything had been swept away. It was like the bad shit moved aside and all the good shit replaced it inside of me.

Knowing how happy Sam was, I was filled with a sudden desperation to see Channing.

But before that, Sam and I would talk.

She was six months along. Happy. Eager. And in love. Despite all of Sam’s demons and haunts, I always knew she’d end up happy.

She asked how I was and I caught her up on everything except two things: the ache inside of me and my relationship with Channing. After we hung up, I texted him.

Me: Want to come over tonight?

Channing: Fuck yeah.

Channing: I have to stay for closing. I’ll be over after.

A pause. Then,

Channing: Missed you.

I grinned stupidly; I couldn’t help myself.

Then there was a knock at the door. Brandon poked his head around.

“Suki and the cook are fighting.”

Of course. It was a day that ended with y.

Time to get back to work. I stood up. “Over what?”

“She saw him with a dull knife.”

She was the manager. I shrugged. Made total sense.