Nine
Kade buried the body without me. I didn’t mind, I suppose. He deserves some alone time to say goodbye to his father. When he came back, he didn’t say a word. I was already in bed, showered and clean. I pretended to be asleep as he slipped in next to me. After my little revelation, I didn’t want to talk to him. In a way, I blame him for my feelings. He’s toyed with me from the second I arrived and I know this is what he wants…he wants me to love him so I never betray him. I’d never betray him and he didn’t have to make me fall for him to assure that. He’s my Fortunate, being faithful is the only thing I really need to do and I would’ve done it, love or not.
He keeps his distance tonight, sleeping with his back to me. He didn’t try to hug me like he does most nights and I’m not going to lie, it kind of hurts, but at the same time, it’s good for my head. I need to think clearly. I need to make sure my feelings are real and not a result of mind-blowing sex. Perhaps I need to be in my bed and away from the body heat exuding from a half-naked Kade. Hell, even his body heat has sex appeal. I roll my eyes and push back the blankets. My bed definitely sounds like a good idea.
I slip from the bed, holding my dress as tightly to my body as I can—as if it’ll protect me from the cold air. If I’m being honest, wearing these dresses is really starting to get old. I could go with some pants…or a jacket, something to really keep me warm.
I tip-toe across the room and out the door without a glance over my shoulder. In the morning when he wakes up, he might be mad, but an Unfortunate shouldn’t share a bed with their Fortunate, anyway. Not like one would if they were in a relationship. Vince already caught us snuggling once and I don’t want to risk it again. My feet pat against the wood, making soft sounds as I make my way down the hallway towards the stairs. As I reach out for the ball on the end of the banister and turn down the stairs, I see Thirteen.
“Thirteen?” I whisper, more out of shock than anything else.
She looks…different. Her face is gaunt and sullen—obvious even in this dim light. “Nine.”
“How are you?” I cringe at my stilted question, but let’s face it; this situation is anything but comfortable.
She tilts her chin and straightens her shoulders. “I’m all right…not as good as you, but I’m surviving.”
Not as good as me? What the hell is that supposed to mean? I let the comment roll off my shoulder. She’s right. I’ve had it easy.
“I heard about what happened at Vince’s birthday…I’m glad Kade came in time to help you.”
Instantly, I detect bitterness in her tone. Is she mad at me? “I’m sorry…did I do something wrong?”
“No,” she hisses under her breath, her voice cracking. “You never do. Now, excuse me while I go do my whore duties.”
I flinch. Was that a shot at me? She’s going to ‘please’ a Fortunate, which is all I’m supposed to do for Kade…so is she calling me a whore? Can you even be a whore if it’s forced? Well, with me, it’s not force. Kade would never force me to do anything, but it is all I’m supposed to do. She attempts to storm past me, but I grab her hand, forcing her to stay put. Her bones are brittle in my hand. I feel like it’ll shatter if I squeeze too hard.
“There’s a mine,” I tell her, unable to stop myself. “A Sario mine north of here—across the lake, over the fence, and on the other side of the mountain. It’s being used as a safe haven for Unfortunates.”
She snatches her hand away. “Why are you telling me this?”
“I want you to go. Don’t put yourself through torture, Thirteen. It’s not worth it.”
Thirteen snorts and leans in. There’s nothing friendly about her face…the girl I knew in the Unfortunate camp is gone. “If it’s such a good plan, why are you still here?”
I blow out air. It’s a question I’ve thought about for a while. I know I can get away. Kade leaves more than enough room for me to run, but I can’t. “I can’t leave, Thirteen. I need to be with Kade…”
Her face pinches together and I know she doesn’t understand. Who would? Choosing to stay with your Fortunate when someone is telling you about freedom—true freedom—sounds insane. Then, realisation lights up her features. Her brows arch and her lips part. “You love him?”
“No,” I state immediately, running the palms of my hands over my dress. “It’s not like that. I mean, it is like that, but—”
“You’ve spent all this time feeling sorry for me when it’s I who should feel sorry for you.”
I frown. “Why?”
“Because you’re clearly deluded. He has you wrapped around his little finger. He might protect you, Nine, but you’re still an Unfortunate. As disposable as a dirty cloth.”
With an uncharacteristic sneer, she turns away from me. I can’t be upset with her…it’s not her fault. This life has ruined her—Vince has ruined her.
“You can be free, Thirteen,” I whisper loudly. “Think about it. If we’re all disposable anyway, what’s the harm? If you decide to go, you have to warn them. Tell them that the Sarios will blow up the mine.”
She doesn’t look over her shoulder. She keeps her head down and her shoulders squared before disappearing into the dark hallway. I guess I can’t force her. If she knows what’s best for her, she’ll go. I got her into this mess. She was assigned as a kitchen hand and because of me, Vince uses her for other purposes entirely. Thirteen deserves better and I hope she listens. I really do.
∞
A thump against my door wakes me, bright and early. After speaking to Thirteen last night, I crashed out. It was easier to fall asleep without Kade next to me. I had nothing here to send my body, or brain, buzzing. I sit up quickly, so quick my thin blanket slips off and lands on the floor. I rake my fingers through my hair as the distinct sound of busy feet slapping the floor just outside my door shakes my room. I guess the Unfortunates are busy this morning. I can only imagine what kind of ridiculous breakfast they have planned today. I force myself out of bed and over to my wardrobe. I think I’ll opt for the traditional, white Unfortunate tunic today. I’m sure Kade won’t mind, otherwise why would he put it in my wardrobe?
When I’ve pulled my hair back into a ponytail, tied up tightly with a band that pulls at my hair, I open my door and come nose to chest with my Fortunate.
Shit.
His crisp black suit smells fresh and warm, like spring mornings, and slowly, I drag my eyes up his chest, over his beautifully thick throat and onto his face. I don’t dare take a step back as I take in his dark, coal irises.
“Good morning,” he states. I think…I think I can hear an accusatory tone. Surely, he can’t be mad that I slept in my own bed? It’s not really that big of a deal. “Sleep well?”
“Uh, I gues—”
His hands fly to my chest and he pushes me back into my room. I stumble backwards, but manage to find my balance before I fall on my ass.
“Kade,” I hiss. “What the hell—”
My words catch as he snaps forward and grabs me by the throat. He squeezes, not enough to hurt me, but enough to shut me up. “You said I could trust you!”
“Y-you can.” I manage to squeeze out at great pain to my throat. “Kaden…”
He tightens his grip. “You were on my computer.”
Oh. I literally feel blood drain from my face and the hurt that flickers over Kade’s features tells me he can see it. “Let me explain.” A sharp spike of fear shoots into the thickest arteries of my heart and I blink out a rogue tear that blurs the vision in my left eye. Thankfully, he slightly releases his grip. “The night we had sex—the first time—I was trying to sleep, but I couldn’t. Your computer was glowing so brightly so I got up to turn it off. I saw a message from your father.” Kade’s jaw contracts rhythmically, but his features don’t soften. What does it matter? There’s no way I can spin this story to help me. I invaded his privacy. “I clicked it and I read it. When I was finished, I closed it and it disappeared. I thought you wouldn’t notice.”
“I almost didn’t,” he says. “Until moderators kick my door down screaming they saw an Unfortunate escape from this house and head for the lake.”
My brows pull together. An Unfortunate escaped? “Thirteen…” Oh my god. She did it! She got away! Absolute joy fills my insides, warming me like a kitchen during dinner.
“I thought it was you,” he mutters, looking me dead in the eyes. “You were gone and there was an attempted Unfortunate escape…and I thought it was you.”
Attempted? The welcomed warmth begins to cool. “Attempted? What does that mean?”
“They caught her.”
At his words, my entire body slumps and his hand falls away. “They caught—” I swallow hard. “What are they going to do to her?”
Kade doesn’t answer me. Instead, he grips me by the elbow and pulls me out of my room. I don’t dare fight him, not with so many Moderators lurking about. One by one, they all wait against various walls, watching the uneasy Unfortunates do their jobs. On my way past the kitchen, I catch Portia’s eye and she gives me a sympathetic smile. I don’t smile back. I keep my eyes on the floor as numbness takes over.
Kade opens a door on the bottom floor, almost adjacent to his father’s room. No one is in a panic about Michael’s disappearance. They mustn’t know yet. He pushes me in and I stumble yet again. I glare at him over my shoulder before turning to the rest of the room—and what a room it was. It’s the perfect sitting room, filled with plush, royal red couches and matching drapes. It’s then I become hyper aware of my feet as the soft, mahogany carpet kisses the soles. It radiates cosiness and warmth. I’m completely lost in the room until someone clears their throat. I bring my attention to the people who occupy the gorgeous room—Albert Knowle and his wife Melissa, Kathryn and John Milano, Will and Rita Miller, Vince Sario…and Kade Sario. All four household surnames in the one room…I drop to my knees and keep my hands behind my back. This is clearly a formal meeting. An Unfortunate should never be standing during a formal meeting unless ordered to. In their presence, I’m suddenly a mass of quaking nerves. Not even the brush of Kade’s leg against my arms as he stands beside me is enough to still them.
“I’ve brought her here, just like you asked,” he states. “A waste of time, but you’ll come to see that.”
“I’m sure this has nothing to do with the poor girl,” Kathryn objects, watching me with such sympathy. She’s always been kind to me…for no reason. I like her. I like her a lot.
“We’ll see,” Vince rebuts, adjusting his navy blue sweater. “Thirteen was talking to someone last night and I’m willing to bet everything I own it was her.”
“Impossible,” Kade interrupted. “She was with me. I sent her to her room in the early hours of the morning, during the alleged attempted escape, not before.”
I resist the urge to peer up at him. Why is he defending me? I invaded his privacy. He has every right to push me under the rushing stampede.
“Why are you two here?” Albert demands. “Where is Michael?”
“I haven’t seen him since our last meeting,” Kade answers, seemingly bored.
“He’d never miss the chance to punish an Unfortunate for escaping,” Vince adds. “He has his watch on the door which means he doesn’t want us to bother him—for anything. Maybe he’s feeling under the weather. So we’re here in his place. Deal with it.”
“Can we get started? I have other engagements, you know.” Rita, the blonde who looks almost identical to Elizabeth (except older), flicks her hair over her shoulder and scowls at me. I guess she isn’t a big fan, either. Then again, why would she be?
“Unfortunate.” Albert sighs and reaches into his chest pocket. “Have you ever seen this map?” He unfolds the paper and holds it out for me to see. It’s identical to the one I saw on Kade’s computer, but I’m not about to tell him that.
“No, sir.”
“There’s nowhere you could have seen it? Even by accident?”
I shake my head, feeling more and more worthless. “No, sir.”
“Enough with this. If she knows anything, she’s not going to tell us. We have to force it out of her. Bring in the other girl,” Rita orders and my entire body tightens.
“Let Nine go, she doesn’t know anything,” Kathryn protests.
I want to smile at her, to thank her for supporting me, but I don’t dare. I sit and watch, keeping my lips shut unless I’m asked a direct question. I’m not scared of Kade, but I’m absolutely terrified of what they can make him do to me. If I mess up, they’ll make him punish me and he’ll have no choice.
“I agree,” Kade states.
“She’s your Unfortunate, your vote doesn’t count,” Will chimes in.
Vince also takes his turn. “I vote she stays. I’m not finished with her yet.”
“I’m with Vince,” says Rita.
Besides Kathryn and Kade, they all agree to keep me in the room and not a second later, Moderators drag in a beaten and bloodied Thirteen. I surge forward, but Kade’s strong hand grips my shoulder, holding me in place.
“Not a favourable reaction, Unfortunate,” Rita says to me.
“They grew up in the same camp. Nine may be an Unfortunate, but she’s still human,” Kade snaps, subtly caressing me with his thumb.
They talk, but I’m unable to keep my eyes off Thirteen. Her face…I don’t even recognise it anymore. She’s bleeding from her nose, her head—her mouth! How could they? Are their stomachs lined with steel? How can they tolerate such brutality?
The moderators leave and Thirteen lies still on the floor, her chest barely rising and falling. A war of emotions rage within me and clench my heart…they’re going to kill her.
Tears blur my vision as I take in her dirt-covered form. Do I exist only to ruin this poor girl’s life? This…all of it…it’s my fault.
With a pained grunt, she angles her head to face me and offers the faintest smirk. The smirk sends my mind in confusing circles. Why doesn’t she hate me?
Thirteen’s face becomes my entire universe, until the black leather of Vince’s shoe pressing against my knee pulls me back down to Earth. I peer up as Vince extends a nine tailed whip to Kade, but he doesn’t take it.
“Go on, brother,” he insists. “Dad’s not here and you’re the eldest Sario, why don’t you try your hand at whipping? You might enjoy it.”
Kade forces a smile with a light shake of his head. “She’s your problem, not mine. You deal with it.”
Vince sneers, exposing his perfect white teeth. “It’ll be my pleasure.”
He saunters closer to the broken Thirteen, tapping the hard end of the whip in the palm of his hand.
“Don’t!” I scream, heaving forward. “Don’t you touch her!”
Screw sadness. Screw being weak. I’ll defend my own even if it brings death. She deserves someone to care about her, to stand up for her. The Fortunates sitting on the couches gasp as Kade wraps his arms around me and pulls me back. I struggle against him, but he’s too strong for me. I grit my teeth as Vince beams widely at me, excited by my outburst.
“I don’t know who this is going to hurt more.”
Rita gasps. “You’re going to let her talk to us like that?”
“I’ll deal with her later,” Kade growls, squeezing me until my lungs ache.
Vince cocks his arm back, until his sweater tightens around his biceps, and then he lets his arm fly. The whip comes down hard and makes a loud ‘crack’ as it lashes her thighs.
I flinch as she screams out.
“Stop!” Bile rises in my throat and my entire body feels as if it’s floating away from me. This can’t be real…Vince whips her again and she screams. There are sobs sounding loudly in my ears and I glance around the room for a few long seconds before I realise it’s coming from me.
“We don’t do this in our house!” Kathryn protests, as mascara tears stain her cheeks.
“No, you have the moderators take care of it,” Rita announces over whips and sobs. “That’s why you have the highest Unfortunate misbehaviour rates out of any of us. They’re not scared of you. Your Unfortunates don’t respect you.”
Kathryn swipes at her face and pushes off of the couch. Her orange floral patterned dress swirls around her feet as she storms towards the door. She offers no farewells. She just leaves with her partner in tow, completely offended and emotional.
“Do you want to re-think your answers, Nine? You’ve never seen this map before?”
Whip. Scream. My bottom lip trembles and I bite it.
“You didn’t help this Unfortunate escape?”
Whip. Scream. I flinch. “I—”
“She didn’t!” Thirteen cries, pulling her knees to her chest. “She didn’t.”
“Stop it!” I yell at her. I’ve never felt so helpless than I do in this moment. If they want a confession, fine, I’ll give them one. I refuse to have Thirteen’s death on my conscience.
Kade hauls me up and I thrash against him, begging him to put me down. I don’t care how feral I look.
“Nine clearly knows nothing. Now, if you don’t mind, I’m going to take her back to my room and sort this out.” Kade wraps his arms around my face, stifling my confession with the fabric of his jacket. “You deal with Thirteen, and stop torturing the damn girl, will you?”
“No!” I scream, but it sounds more like a muffled sob than anything else.
I move my legs as Kade carries me from the room. My eyes are blurred and puffy. My face is soaked by tears and my chest hurts worse than anything I’ve ever felt. Then, BANG. A shot rings out and the manor falls quiet. My heart stills and Kade holds me tighter. That’s it. Thirteen is gone…put out of her misery with a bullet to the head. I stare off into the distance, numb and hurt. Everything we pass by is a blur and I can’t hear anything through the ring in my ears.
“Nine?” Kade whispers, wiping my face with a damp wash cloth.
I come to…I’m in his room, sitting on his bed. “It’s all my fault.”
He grips my face, letting his fingers dig into my undoubtedly gaunt features. “Hey, listen to me. It’s not your fault. She ran. She got caught.”
I sniffle. “But I told her to. I told her where the mine was and I told her to run.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
I close my eyes as he pulls my forehead to his. “What happened in that room was fucked up, but it wasn’t your fault. You gave that girl a way out and she took it. The look on her face…she was happy to go, Nine. She didn’t want to be stuck with Vince another minute.”
The mention of his name forces a deadly, black snake of hatred into my stomach. “I want him dead,” I state through gritted teeth. “I want to squeeze his throat in my bare hands until he stops breathing.”
Kade’s lips twitch. “You’ll have to get in line.” His slight curve falls, thinning out into an impassive line. “I have to do something about the mine…you know that, right?”
“But you won’t,” I tell him. “Because it’s not the right thing to do.”
“What do you think is the right thing to do?”
I swipe at my face. “Let them be. They got away, they’ve won.”
“No, they haven’t. The mine is Sario property. I’m going to be head of the house and everyone will be watching. I have to set an example.”
He doesn’t feel comfortable with hurting Unfortunates that he owns, but he’ll gladly blow a bunch up? How does that make any sense? I inch away from him. “Do it and you’re no better than your father—or your brother.”
He releases my face and stands up. I don’t look up at him as he towers above me, but I can feel his penetrative gaze piercing me. “I’ve never claimed to be better than them.”
I cross my arms tightly over my chest.
“You’re mad at me and yet you have no right to be.” I feel his fingers snake through my hair before he closes his fist and bunches up the strands. I wince as he pulls my head back and brings his face an inch from mine. “You betrayed me and I saved your ass again.”
“You saved my ass?” I spit, the sceptical tone thick in my voice.
He tightens his grip on my hair, pulling until it burns my scalp. “You think they weren’t going to kill you? One wrong answer and you’d be dead.”
“You should have let them kill me.” Tears well in my eyes again, as well as feeling thick and warm in my throat. “This society is sick and twisted and I don’t want any part of it.”
Kade crushes his mouth to mine, not caring it’s moist with tears. His lips move roughly against mine, but I don’t kiss him back. I’m not in the mood for my Fortunate. I don’t care how I feel about him, so he claims his stolen kiss, taking pieces of my soul away with his perfect lips.
“Get used to it, Sweetheart,” he speaks against my mouth. “Because I’m not about to let you go.”
With a tug on my hair, he releases it and turns away from me. I drop my head into my hands as he leaves and shuts the door behind him. I’m not sure if I hear it lock or not. There’s too much in my brain to really hear the finer details of my surroundings. I fall back against the mattress and pull my knees into my chest. My heart is deflated…my blood running so thinly through my veins. I watched her die and I didn’t do a damn thing about it. Not the first time I’ve failed her, of course.
Beside me, Thirteen stumbles over a rogue floorboard and falls forward. I reach out, curling my fingers around the band of fabric that flows freely from the back of her dress and her weight tugs my arms. I fall forward too and we both crumple to the dusty floor.
That was the first time I ever tried to help her and even then, I was too scared to stick it out and help her up. She was rammed with the tail end of Soyer’s gun…and I didn’t do anything.
I take a deep inhale and release it slowly, then I hear a slap on the wood. I whip my head to Thirteen, but she’s no longer on her pedestal. She’s a tangle of limbs and fabric on the floor. The spectators chuckle and the sound twists my stomach. Instinctively, I step forward to help her, but Kade’s large hand snatches my wrist and he holds me in place. My pulse thrums hard against the veins in my wrist and I know he can feel it.
“Leave her,” he growls under his breath, squeezing me to the point of physical pain.
“I can’t just leave—”
He grabs a fistful of my hair and subtly squeezes until my scalp burns. I wince, inhaling sharply. Thankfully, nobody is looking at us. They eagerly watch Thirteen as the Fortunate that stood behind her slaps her hard across the face. The sound reverberates around my skull and makes my chest ache.
Again. I did nothing. For the second time.
Hot tears spill out and burn down my face. I inhale and it’s all over the place as my body rocks with sobs. Thirteen is dead…I killed her.