The Darkness
The moonlight filtered through the pine trees lining the fields, leaving shadows on the pavement. The crisp air that had been missing for months caressed my skin. Cranking up the radio, I sang along to the lyrics from Justin Timberlake’s ”Rock Your Body”. It was just the cool breeze, JT, and me. I couldn’t wait to crawl in my bed, close my eyes, getting lost in a dream world that had nothing to do with my current reality.
The night had been perfect. I had dinner and drinks with my best friend, Sophia, and although I was exhausted from a long workday I felt a sense of serenity. Spending time with Sophia always made me happy. She was like a sister to me, especially when she lived with me for over a year. I felt like part of me had been missing since the day she moved out, leaving me behind.
Dancing in the seat, screaming out the lyrics, I thought about how I wanted someone that would do everything the song described. No one had ever made me feel the way that JT sang about women. The steering wheel shook in my hands and a screeching sound pulled me out of my JT trance.
“Damn it,” I said, hitting the steering wheel with my palm.
The orange flash from my hazards blinked against the dark pavement as I pulled off the road and my car sputtered to a stop. Bad luck seemed to follow me. I squeezed the steering wheel, trying to calm my frazzled nerves. I knew the day would come, the day my car would die, but I prayed it would happen after my next paycheck… no such luck.
Resting my head on the wheel, I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. “Great, just fucking great.” I rocked back and forth, feeling sorry for myself, hitting my head on the cool plastic. I thought about who to call or where to walk. I hadn’t passed a gas station or even a damn streetlight in miles. Without picking up my head I reached for my phone, bringing it to my eyes.
“Shit.” The screen wouldn’t power on after I hit every button I could think to press, but it was useless. It was dead and now I’m totally stranded. What else could possibly go wrong? Sighing, I sat up and glanced in the rearview mirror but only the shadows from the trees filled my view. No cars, neon signs, or streetlights. Fuck.
I placed my hand on my chest to feel the beat of my heart, which was so hard I swear it was audible. Visions from slasher movies flooded my mind. Girl’s deserted on the side of the road until she’s found by a handsome stranger that ends up being a serial killer.
Should I start walking to God knows where? Do I just sit here and wait for a stranger to offer me help? I never liked feeling helpless, I was too smart to be helpless, but it was the only thing I felt in this moment. It could be hours before someone found me in my car.
I grabbed my purse, dead phone, and keys and climbed out of the car. My feet ached in the extra high heels I wore. Leaning against the car, I gave my feet a moment to adjust, as I looked in both directions. Neither of my options close and I was exhausted. My feet fucking screamed from standing still. Thank God I could sleep in tomorrow after the way this evening was ending. There was a gas station a couple miles back – better to go with what I know than to walk into an uncertain future. I tapped the lock button on my key chain one more time, helping relieve my OCD need to double check everything, before I starting walking away.
Barely clearing the trunk, a single light came over a small hill in the distance, hurting my eyes from the brightness. The roar of the engine grew louder as the distance closed. I waved my arms as a figure came into view, but the asshole biker drove right passed me as I screamed, “Hey! Hey!” The wind from his bike caused the dust on the road to kick up and fill my mouth.
I turned around, coughing, and screamed toward the bike. I knew it was pointless. There was no way in hell he’d heard me yelling above the roar of his bike, but he had to see me. The red taillight lit up the road as he turned the bike in my direction. I swallowed hard, unsure if this was my best idea of the night – I’d already made too many mistakes to dwell. He was my only hope of getting home.
I stood there like a deer in headlights, unable to move as I gaped at him. My hands tremble as the figure on the bike came to a stop. The engine was almost deafening, as I took in the sight of him on the machine. The bike was a Harley, a Fat Boy, with no windshield, chrome handlebars, and a dark body. He wore black boots, dark jeans, and a dark t-shirt. He was large, muscular, and I sucked in a breath as my eyes reached his handsome and rugged face. A playful grin danced on his lips as he watched me ogle him. Fucking hell.
“Need some help, lady?” he asked, removing his helmet, running his fingers through his disheveled hair. The dark peaks stood up on the top, the sides were short and clipped, and the color matched the sky - dark. I couldn’t see his eyes; a pair of tinted glasses hid them. Could serial killers be so sexy?
“Um, do you have a cell phone I could use to call for a ride?” I asked without taking a step in his direction. Don’t get too close – leave room to run. Who the fuck was I kidding? I couldn’t make it five feet in these damn shoes.
“Sure.” As he leaned back on his bike, I studied his body as he dug in his pocket. The skin-tight jeans showed his muscles through the denim fabric. Everything clung to him. I wanted to poke him to see if he felt as hard as he looked. What the fuck is wrong with me?
I was too busy staring to notice that he was holding out for me. “Lady, you wanted my phone?”
Snapping back to reality with the sound of his deep voice, I took a step toward him, reaching for the phone. “Oh, sorry.”
My fingertips grazed his palm, a tiny shock passed between us. His fingers closed on my hand as I pulled away. My heartbeat that calmed, now began to pound feverishly in my chest. It had to be my hormones. I hadn’t had sex in God knows how long – I stopped counting after three months. The man in front of me wasn’t my type, but that didn’t stop his sex appeal from being lost on me. He looked like a whole lot of trouble that I didn’t need that in my life.
I stepped back, keeping my eyes trained on him, as I dialed the only person close enough to help - Sophia. The phone rang and his eyes traveled up and down the length of my body – with each ring, my stomach began to turn. I didn’t have anyone else to call.
Tapping the end button I sighed. “There’s no answer. Thanks.” I gave him a sheepish smile as I handed him the phone.
“Let me take a look and see if there’s anything I can do. Okay?” he asked, as he began angling the bike to shine the headlights on the hood.
“Sure.” I hit the unlock button on my car key before climbing in. I put the key in the ignition, but stayed aware of his proximity. No one will hear me scream if he tries to kill me. I couldn’t let my guard down.
He put the kickstand down, climbed off the bike, and placed the helmet on the seat. Pulling the hood latch next to my seat I watched him from the relative darkness of my car, my face hidden by shadows. He was large, larger than he looked sitting on the Harley. He had to be more than a foot taller than me and looked more solid with the bike illuminating his body. I stared at him, mouth open slightly, my breathing shallow as I looked at him like a piece of meat through the gap between the hood. He oozed masculinity and ruggedness and I tried to picture him without all the skintight clothes. The muscles in his arm rippled as he touched the parts under the hood.
What would it be like to be with a man like him? Every man I’d dated just didn’t work out. They were nice guys, but the spark I wanted was always missing. People think I’m a good girl, and I am, but my mind is filled with dirty thoughts that I could never share with a mate. I’ve shared them with Sophia, but she doesn’t count. No one had ever done anything fantasy-worthy with me. I can barely speak the words that are needed to describe the things I want done to me, or that I’d want to do to another person in this world.
“Ma’am,” he said, snapping me out of the evaluation of my sex life, or lack thereof.
“Sorry, yes?”
“Can you try and start it for me, please?” he said, leaning over the hood, his hands placed on either side of the opening. “Now,” he said. The car churned and churned. “Stop.” I heard him yell over the screeching noise. He moved methodically throughout the engine of the car. “Try it again.” I turned the key causing the engine to rattle, but not start.
He stood, rubbing the back of his neck as curses spilled from his lips. The only thing I could see was his crotch. I stared motionless. His t-shirt covered the belt loops and stopped just above his groin. Damn. He fills out those jeans. He has to be big. Everything about him is big – he couldn’t, just couldn’t, have a small cock, could he?
The last guy that I’d slept with was more the size of a party pickle. It was the most unsatisfying sexual experience of my life. He was a teacher and I wanted someone who was educated and self-sufficient, but he was boring in and out of the bedroom. I thought I’d found that with Derek, Mr. Pickle, but I was wrong. He was a wreck and filled with more mental issues than anyone I’d ever know. He was germ-a-phobic, which was problematic when having sex. He’d jump right out of bed immediately after sex to shower and wash the dirty off. I sighed to myself remembering his need to be clean, never mind that he was an asshole too.
The hood of my car made a loud thump as he slammed it. “Your car is a little tricky. Foreign cars can be complicated. I can’t seem to get it to start,” he said walking toward the driver side door.
“It’s okay. Thanks for trying.” I climbed out not wanting to be trapped inside. What the hell am I going to do now?
“I was heading to the bar up the road. Want to join me?” He smiled and tilted his head as he studied me. “You can call a tow truck from there. It may take them a while for them to get out here.”
I couldn’t think of any other option. He was my only hope, my saving grace from the dark roadside and a means to an end. There are worse things than climbing on the back of his motorcycle and wrapping my arms around him. “Okay, but I’ve never been on a bike.”
“Never? How is that even possible?” he asked, shaking his head, a small laugh escaping his lips. His teeth sparkled in the light, straight and white. His jaw was strong, his cheekbones jutted out more when he smiled, and a small dimple formed on the left side of his face.
I looked down at the ground, my cheeks heated. “I don’t know. I just never knew anyone that had one and I find them totally scary.”
“It’s not far from here and there isn’t much traffic. I’ll keep you safe,” he said, holding out his helmet.
My stomach fluttered as I closed the car door and thought about my first motorcycle ride. The black round helmet felt cool against my fingers as I took it from him. I scrunched my eyebrows together as I studied it. I didn’t know if there was a front or a back, or how to put it on.
“Here, let me help you,” he said as he reached for the helmet, removing it from my grip. His hand touched mine and I felt the spark again. Not a real spark, but electricity that I felt with every fiber of my being from the slightest touch. My body wanted his touch but my mind was throwing up the caution flag.
Placing it gently on my head, he ran his rough fingers down the straps, almost caressing my skin, to adjust it to fit my face. I inhaled deeply trying to fill all my senses with him, he smelled different than any other man I’d smelled. He didn’t smell of cheap cologne but there was a spicy woodsy scent that reminded me of home. I closed my eyes, and relished the feel of his warm skin against mine.
“All done. Are you ready?” he asked.
I opened my eyes, heat creeping up my neck as I had been lost in his touch. “Yes.” I prayed my voice didn’t betray me.
He climbed on the bike, sliding forward, making room for me. “Lift your leg and climb on.”
Placing my hand on his shoulder to help balance myself, I followed his instructions, my body slid forward, smashing against him. Rock solid. He turned his head, looking me in the eyes. “Put your feet on the pegs and wrap your arms around me. I don’t bite, well, unless you want me to.” He smirked and my heart felt like it was doing the tango in my chest as I pressed against his back. He didn’t just say that to me, did he? I lifted my feet off the ground, turning over complete control to the stranger I was entrusting with my life. I locked my hands together completely wrapped around him.
“Ready?”
“Wait! I don’t even know your name. I mean I’m putting my life in your hands and I don’t even know who you are.” I gripped his body tighter, clinging to him.
I couldn’t hear his laughter, but I felt the rumble of it from deep in his chest. “My friends call me City, sugar.” He throttled the engine and my heart skipped a beat. Fear gripped me – there’s no turning back now.
My grip became vice-like, fear overcoming any need to be cool or seem calm in front of him. He patted my hands before the bike began to move and I couldn’t bear to look. I buried my face in his back, avoiding any chance of seeing the road. The wind caressed my skin, causing it to feel like ice compared to the warmth my palms experienced. Does this man have any soft spots? I flexed my fingers against his chest wanting to feel his hardness, praying like hell I made it seem natural and not like I was molesting him.
The bike picked up speed and my heart thundered against his back. Gripping him harder, holding on for dear life, the sound of the engine drowned out everything else around me, except the two of us. He leaned into the bike, his ass moving snuggly between my legs. I didn’t dare move. He was warm, comfortable, and I enjoyed every minute my body touched his. I closed my eyes, trying to not think about the movement of the bike underneath us – the slight shift and unevenness of the road made me feel off balance.
The noise of the engine changed and I finally peaked over his shoulder. The parking lot of The Neon Cowboy was packed with bikes and was the brightest thing for miles. I’d driven by it dozens of times, but never thought about stopping. This wasn’t the type of bar for kids on speedy foreign-made bikes, but a place that tough bikers hang out, drink beer, and pick up chicks.
City backed the bike into an empty spot and I could feel my body begin to tremble from the fear that finally began to seep through my veins. I did it. I rode on a motorcycle and with a stranger, no less. My breath was harsh and as I blinked slowly and tried to calm myself down.
“You can climb off now, sugar.” His legs were straddling the bike and he held the handlebars, securing the bike for me. “Enjoy your first ride?”
I released my hands from the security of his body and hoisted myself off on trembling legs. “It was the single most terrifying thing I’ve ever experienced,” I said, thankful when my feet were firmly on the ground. I stood, trying to get my body to stop shaking and my heart to slow down before walking inside the bar with him at my side.
“If that’s the scariest thing you’ve ever experienced, you need to get out more, sugar. I took it slow with you.” He grinned and my stomach plummeted from his sinful smile. I wanted to see him above me naked and moving in and out of my body slowly almost at a torturous pace. Everything about him made my body convulse and scream for attention. He wasn’t my type. I preferred a book worm and a man that liked to spend an evening inside watching a movie or playing Scrabble, not riding like a bat out of hell on a Fat Boy to hang out at a bar. I wasn’t a bar fly and never would be.
The outdoor lights gave me a full view of the man that called himself City. His hair was darker than I originally thought, almost jet-black, and an inch long on the top, brushing against his forehead as he shook it out. It was a mess from the wind with the front hanging over his forehead. I couldn’t tell the color of his eyes, they were still hidden behind the tinted lenses of his glasses.
“Yeah, lucky me,” I chuckled and tried to play it cool even though my body shook. If that was slow I didn’t think I wanted to know what his idea of fast and hard were, or did I? Fuck me. He had my brain all jumbled.
Removing the helmet, I ran my fingers through my hair trying to straighten it after the wild ride. He laughed as he crawled off the bike, taking the helmet from my hands, and placed it on the seat. I watched mesmerized as he removed his glasses and put them inside a small bag hanging from the side of the bike. I wanted to see his eyes and the entire man without a mask or veil.
“Ready, babe?” he motioned toward the door.
I wanted to scream no, but I didn’t have a choice. I could never walk into this sort of place on my own.
“Yeah, ready as I’ll ever be.” I started walking toward the door and felt a hand on my arm, stopping me in my tracks. I looked at his fingers wrapped around my arm and turned toward him. “What are you doing?”
“You can’t just walk into a place like this. You’re an outsider. They’ll eat you alive in there. I don’t want anyone giving you shit. We have to make them believe you’re with me so they leave you the fuck alone. Unless you want the attention?” he asked with a crooked eyebrow.
“I don’t.” I didn’t mind the idea of making everyone in the bar think we’re together. City was hot and seemed like a nice guy; he did stop to help me when he could’ve driven right by me.
“Just stay by my side and follow my lead. I know these people and I don’t want them sniffing around you. They look for easy prey,” he said, giving me a smile that made my body tingle and my sex convulse.
“Okay, I’ll stick to you like glue and follow your lead.” Jesus, I sounded like a dork. I’ve always been a bookworm. I was national honor society member, and when all my friends were partying, I stayed in my dorm to study.
City nestled me against his side, tucking me between his body and arm. I moved with him, trying to keep up with his fluid movements, but my legs were so short I felt like I almost had to jog to keep time with him. He opened the door and I was immediately hit with a smoky smell, loud twangy music, and a dozen set of eyes looking directly at us.
Randomly people yelled out “City” throughout the bar, giving me a clue that he was a regular. I felt like I entered a seedy version of Cheers and City was Norm, only sexy and muscular. He leaned down placing his mouth next to my ear I felt his hot breath before I could hear his words.
“Stick close and show no fear,” he whispered, causing goose bumps to break out across my skin. “Let’s say hello then we’ll call a tow for you.”
City looked big enough to handle any man in this place, but I didn’t want to take that chance. I concentrated on breathing, keeping my chin up, and watching where I walked. The floor was filled with peanut shells and dust and it made the walk in the stilettos even more treacherous than normal. I could barely walk when I bought them, but they looked too sexy to pass up.
We walked to a table filled with men all wearing their leather vests covered in patches. They were unshaven, as dangerously sexy as City with mischievous smiles on their faces. “Who’s this lovely lady, City?” one man asked. His eyes raked up my body, stopping at my breasts before he looked at my face.
“This is Sunshine. Don’t even fucking think about it, Tank, she’s with me,” City said with a smile on his face as he pulled me closer.
Sunshine? I never told him my name and he never asked. I didn’t like the way Tank looked at me. Thank God he wasn’t the one driving by while I was stranded. He looked at me like I was a piece of meat; a meal for his enjoyment.
Tank put his hands up in surrender. “Dude, I’d never. Chill the fuck out. I’m just enjoying the view,” he said, his eyes moving from City to me, and not being coy about his visual molestation.
City squeezed my waist, “Sunshine, this is Tank, the asshole,” he said pointing to each of the men. “This is Hog, Frisco, Sam, and Bear.” He pointed at each of the men as he rattled off the silly nicknames.
The nicknames didn’t seem to fit any of the men except Bear. His arms were hairy and he was big, huge in fact with dark hair and a fuzzy face. He looked huggable and kind with soft hazel eyes.
“Hi,” I said, looking at each of them quickly, but I didn’t try to memorize their names.
“I didn’t know you were bringing a woman tonight, City,” Bear said.
“Wilder shit has happened, Bear,” he said pulling me closer, leaving no space between us.
“She doesn’t look like your usual taste, my friend.” Bear smirked. “I don’t mean that shitty, girl, I just mean you’re one fine piece of ass and too good for that low life motherfucker. You should be sitting on my lap.” He patted his leg and I wanted to find an exit. I looked down and studied my clothes. I didn’t wear the trashy clothes some of the women in here wore, but I looked classy, sexy even, and not a hint of nerd to be found.
City moved toward Bear and my heart sank as he began to speak. “Show some respect, you asshole. That’s not how you talk to a lady.” City stood inches from Bear’s face. “Apologize to the lady. Now.” City towered over him as Bear stayed rooted in his chair.
Bear looked at me and I could see him swallow hard before he spoke. “I’m sorry, Sunshine. I was just kidding around. I really am an asshole, forgive me please.”
“No harm done, Bear,” I said with a fake smile, hoping to calm the situation.
“We’re going to sit at the bar.” City looked at Bear, not moving his eyes.
“Come on dude, sit with us. Don’t mind Bear. He’s a total dick. Make his ass go sit at the bar,” Sam begged.
“Sunshine and I want to be alone. I’ll catch you guys another night,” City said, pressing his hand against my back, guiding me away from the table and the large bar area.
“I’m sorry. They can be childish dicks. Bear doesn’t have a filter,” he said as he pulled out a chair for me. City had manners. Not many of the men I dated did something as simple as pull out a chair for a lady – it was a lost art. “He’s a good guy, but sometimes his mouth runs and he doesn’t think before he speaks.”
“It’s okay, really… it is. Thanks for sticking up for me,” I said to him as I sat down, pulling my stool closer to the bar top. “Why did you call me Sunshine?”
“Well, I don’t know your name and you remind me of sunshine – your hair is golden and your smile glows. Just sounded right. I had to come up with something on the fly,” he said. “I hope you didn’t mind.” He shrugged and grabbed the menu laying nearby.
“I didn’t mind, but my name is Suzy.”
“What would you like, Suzy?”
I wanted to say ‘you’ because somehow this man made me lose my grip on reality. “Virgin daiquiri, please.”
“Virgin? Really?” His brows shot up and corner of his mouth twitched.
“I already had a drink tonight. I just want something sweet, no liquor.”
“Do you want something to eat?” he asked. “You a vegetarian too?” he laughed.
“Shut up.” I smacked him on the arm. “I’m good. I just want to call a tow truck.”
“Gotcha.” He pulled out his phone and placed it on the bar. “Hey darlin’, can you put in an order for a cheeseburger, a beer, and a virgin daiquiri?” he asked the bartender.
“Sure thing, handsome,” she said, walking away, slowly swaying her hips to grab attention. I turned to City to see if he was watching her, but he was staring at me instead and my mouth felt dry and scratchy.
“You want to call Triple A or someone else?” he asked without taking his eyes off me. They were an amazing shade of blue and I couldn’t look away. I’d always loved my blue eyes, but his were almost turquoise. I felt like he was staring through me, into me, seeing everything I hid under the surface. I wanted him, but I didn’t want to admit my attraction. I couldn’t admit it.
“Triple A is good,” I said reaching for my purse to find my membership card. I fumbled with my wallet, finding the card behind everything else inside. I could feel his eyes on me, he studied me and it made me nervous. What was he thinking? I dialed the number as I swiveled away from him needing to avert his stare.
“Hello, Triple A, how can I help you?” I could barely hear the tiny female voice above the loud classic rock the pulsed throughout the smoky bar. City chatted with the bartender as I tried to drown them out and give my location and details about my car. They wouldn’t be able to make it out to my car until morning. Fuck. I thanked her for helping me before hitting the end button.
“What’d they say?” City asked with a sincere look as the bartender sashayed away from us.
“They won’t make it out here until morning because they’re busy and we’re in the middle of nowhere. I’m to leave it unlocked so they can get in and put it in neutral or something. I don’t know how it works. I’ve never had my car towed before.” Now what the hell was I going to do? I was stranded at The Neon Cowboy with Mr. Sexalicious and my dirty thoughts.
“I’ll bring you back to your car when I’m done eating. I guess you’ll need a lift home too?” he asked, sipping his drink as he eyed me.
I smiled at him, though I hated the thought of him going out of his way and I wasn’t that comfortable with a stranger knowing where I lived, I couldn’t say no. “I’d appreciate it, if you don’t mind.”
“Not at all, Suzy. I can’t just leave you here and walk out the door. I got ya, babe.” He turned his stool toward me and leaned into my space. “Where do you want me to take you after we leave? Home?” He quirked an eyebrow, waiting for my response and held me in place with his hard stare.
Home? Whose home was he referring to? City looked to be the type that had different women falling out of his bed every morning… or maybe he kicked them out before he fell asleep. His fingers brushed against the top of my hand and my internal dialogue evaporated.
“Where. Do. You. Live?” The laughter he tried to hide behind his hand made it clear that I sat there longer in thought than I had realized.
I cleared my throat. “I need to unlock my car then I need a lift home. I live about fifteen minutes north. Is that okay? I mean, I don’t want to—” He put his finger over my lips and stopped me mid-sentence.
“Doesn’t matter, I’ll take you anywhere,” he said with a sly grin that made my pulse race and my body heat. He licked his lips and I stared like an idiot. My sex convulsed at the thought of his lips on my skin. What the fuck was wrong with me? Every movement he made and word he spoke turned sexual, as if permeating my brain. I needed to get laid; this man was not hitting on me, was he?
“You want some? I can’t eat it all,” he said as the plate was placed in front of him.
I shook my head and picked up my drink trying to cool my body off from the internal fire caused by City. The cool, sweet strawberry slush danced across my tongue and slid down my throat.
I swirled the red straw in my mouth, trying to occupy my mind. His arms flexed as he lifted the burger to his mouth, forearms covered with tattoos. The left arm had various designs woven together— a koi fish, a tiger, and a couple other nature themed pieces that seemed to move across his skin and his right arm had a city skyline. I wanted to touch his arms and run my fingers across his ink. He looked big everywhere and my gaze drifted down his body and lingered at his crotch. I wondered if his motorcycle and tattoos made up for short-coming elsewhere, but I couldn’t believe a man like him was tiny. There’s no way in hell he has a party…
“Pickle?” I blinked and moved my eyes away from his crotch to his eyes. Pickle? He held it and motioned for me to take it.
“No. Thanks, though. You eat it,” I said feeling like he was reading my mind. God, I hope he didn’t see me staring at his crotch. I sucked down the rest of my drink, wishing now that it did have alcohol in it. Maybe then I wouldn’t feel so embarrassed. “I noticed your tattoos. What’s the one on your right arm?”
“That’s the Chicago Skyline,” he said, as he took another bite.
“You from there?”
“Born and bred, baby.” He grunted and continued to chew. I couldn’t take my eyes off his mouth. Watching him eat was erotic to me, his lips moved as he chewed and sucked each finger in his mouth to clean off the juices that flowed from the sandwich. Damn. It had been too long since I had sex – when eating becomes sexual. Houston, we have a problem.