Chapter Thirty-five
“You can do this,” she whispered. “I’ve got faith in you. You’re brave and strong. You can do this…I know you can.”
She had been repeating those words for the last ten minutes, but the woman in the mirror still didn’t look convinced. Her dark eyes were filled with anxiety and more than a hint of fear. Gabby had all the confidence in the world when it came to bringing a man down with a right uppercut or a solid left hook. Bringing him to his knees with desire was something altogether different. Did she really have it in her?
She knew what she wanted in life and had worked hard to accomplish her goals. Things might have moved slower than she had wished, but that didn’t diminish her accomplishments. She was far from perfect, and her mistakes were her own. She took responsibility for each one.
This was not a mistake. Okay, yes, she normally liked going into something already knowing the outcome. But she hadn’t really known what the outcome would be when she’d partnered with Kathleen to bring her brother to justice. So far, that had worked out enormously well. This would, too.
Not that this was the same thing. Risking life and limb was so much easier than risking her heart. If Jonah rejected her, her heart would be scarred forever, without a doubt. Yes, she would go on, but she would hurt for the rest of her life.
The way she looked at it, she had two choices. Take this chance and have Jonah for a short while. Or not take the chance and never know how wonderful it could have been. When she looked at things from that perspective, how could she not take this chance?
She was stalling. Jonah was in charge of the meal tonight. He was downstairs doing his thing, and she was up here willing herself to be brave.
She was wearing a dress, the first she’d worn in months. It was simplistic but feminine. Whoever had purchased her clothes probably hadn’t considered that she would need anything particularly dressy. It wasn’t as if she’d be going out clubbing, not while she was being hunted. The fact that a dress had been included at all was a miracle. So her choice had been easy. This or a pair of jeans or sweats.
With short sleeves, a rounded neckline, and fitted bodice, the multicolored print dress in a cotton-polyester blend made her think of spring. The hem landed a few inches above her knees. She wore a pair of tan wedge sandals and was glad she’d given herself a pedicure this afternoon.
Her makeup supply was limited to mascara and lipstick, but she didn’t want to go overboard anyway.
All in all, she thought she looked rather pretty. Now if she could just do something about the terror in her eyes. What if he said no?
***
Jonah lifted the Crock-Pot lid and sniffed appreciatively. Why hadn’t he tried using this contraption before? His sister, Lacey, had sent the thing as a housewarming present. Figuring the gift was a joke, he’d stored the unopened box in the pantry. Yesterday, Gabby had discovered it, along with an enclosed recipe book. They’d sat on the sofa together and studied each page. If someone had told him a few months back that he’d someday read a recipe book and enjoy himself, he would’ve laughed his ass off.
Gabby made even boring stuff fun.
They’d decided on a roast recipe that looked simple enough. Five ingredients? Even a simpleton cook like him could do that. And judging by the fragrance, his first crock-potted meal was going to be a rousing success.
Gabby had already set the table, and he noted she had opened a bottle of wine. She was now upstairs getting dressed, which worried Jonah. She had told him she was going to wear something special tonight.
Most days, she wore jeans or sweats, which were hard enough to deal with. Gabby had a beautiful body, slender but curvy, with perfectly sized breasts and the most delectable ass he had ever seen. Their lifestyle in the cabin called for casual dress, and the loose-hanging sweats hid most of her charms. He knew what lay beneath but had worked hard to pretend he didn’t. The jeans were harder to handle, since they molded to her body like a second skin, but he’d had a lot of practice forcing his eyes away from the more-tantalizing areas.
And now she was going to dress up for him in something that he was pretty damn sure was going to look spectacular. How the hell was he going to resist her?
Except for the pretense she put on to deal with her public persona, Gabby had lived her life without artifice. This was no different. She had made her attraction clear. Having been isolated for so long, it only made sense that she would want to explore the attraction. She might be twenty-seven years old, but when it came to experience, she was a neophyte. Pushing her away was better for both of them, but that didn’t mean he had to like it.
Unlike Gabby, Jonah was not inexperienced. He knew without a doubt that they would burn up the sheets if he allowed himself to give in to temptation. He couldn’t. It wouldn’t be fair to either of them.
Jonah had done everything under the sun to avoid a confrontation. Hell yeah, he wanted her. Her sunny smile, soft giggle, delicate hands, long, slender feet, and everything in between turned him on like nothing ever had before.
But if they gave in to those needs, what then? It couldn’t last. She would soon have a new life, a new name, a new everything. He couldn’t be part of that life. How smart was it to start something that had no future?
He’d brought her here to protect her, not seduce her.
Turning at a sound behind him, Jonah felt his mouth go dry. All thought of seducing Gabby disappeared, because if he wasn’t mistaken, she was going to take care of that all on her own.
She looked like springtime. Her long hair, gleaming almost blue-black beneath the lighting, curled around her creamy shoulders. The dress was simple and sweet and in no way could be considered provocative. So why the hell did he suddenly want to rip it off and devour the sweetness beneath?
Her smile was Helen of Troy, Cleopatra, and every other femme fatale he’d ever heard of rolled into one. He felt a vague amusement at his earlier arrogance. Experience be damned. Gabriella Mendoza could make the most experienced man in the world feel like an innocent.
“You look nice.”
“Thank you.” The compliment had been lame-assed and weak, not his best effort.
She smiled at him like he’d quoted poetry. “This is the first dress I’ve worn in months. I’d forgotten how much I enjoyed wearing them.”
Jonah kept his eyes focused on her face, doing everything within his power not to let his gaze roam. When she’d walked in, he’d gotten a brief glimpse of her beautiful legs and had almost gasped. There were legs, there were world-class legs, and then there were Gabby Mendoza’s legs. Without a doubt, he had never seen any lovelier.
Her eyes flicked to the counter behind him. “Dinner smells delicious.”
Glad for the reprieve, Jonah turned back to the Crock-Pot and lifted the lid. “Yeah. I think we’ll definitely need to use this thing more often.”
He knew she was still standing behind him, likely waiting for him to turn back around. He could almost feel her disappointment in his response. He was torn between grabbing her for a long, passionate kiss or running out the door.
Dammit, he’d never run from anything in his life. He sure as hell wasn’t going to run from this woman. She deserved better.
Manning up had never been so hard. He turned back to her, and she wasn’t there. Hell, had he hurt her feelings? He started toward the living room and then jerked to a stop. Soft, bluesy, sensual music filled the air, calling to mind slow, hot kisses and bodies pressed together, moving in a rhythm as old as time.
He was in so much trouble.
Undaunted by Jonah’s less-than-enthusiastic response to her first seduction attempt, Gabby selected classic love songs from the satellite music station on the television and headed back to the kitchen. So what if he had seemed more interested in the roast than in her? She refused to give up. She was nervous. Perhaps he was, too.
Surprising her, he was standing in the middle of the kitchen as if waiting for her to come back. “You look beautiful, Gabby. I should have told you that before. Like springtime.”
“Thank you.” She glanced down at her dress. “I don’t know who supplied my clothes, but they did a remarkable job on such short notice. They all fit perfectly.”
His eyes traveled down her body, and Gabby felt the heat all the way to her toes. That was the look she had hoped for. She held out her hand. “Dance with me.”
She watched his throat move as he swallowed hard, and then he gave her the sweetest smile she could ever imagine. Pulling her into his arms, they began a slow dance.
Being held in Jonah’s arms like this was a dream come true. He was about six inches taller than her five-seven height, and her head fit perfectly against his shoulder. She closed her eyes, breathed in his fresh, clean, masculine scent, and drifted, letting her body slide against his as they glided around the small kitchen. This was everything she had ever wanted, right here.
Jonah kept his eyes open and his mind clear. He would give her this, but he had to keep his thoughts on the future and what lay ahead. Getting romantically involved with Gabby was a sure disaster. She would leave soon for her new life, and he’d be off to another job. They’d likely never see each other again. He could not lead her on.
He looked down at her. Her head was on his shoulder, her eyes were closed, and a small smile played around her full lips. In that moment, he knew that if he didn’t stop this now, there was no going back. He would kiss her, and that would lead to every fantasy he’d had coming true.
Dropping his arms, he gave her an impersonal nod. “I’ll get the meal on the table if you’ll pour the wine.”
“Sounds good. I’m starving.”
If she was disappointed in cutting the dance short, she didn’t let on. Like so many times before, they worked together to get the meal on the table. When everything was set, the wine poured, they sat down.
Gabby held up her wine glass. “A toast.” Looking him directly in the eye, she added solemnly, “To the here and now.”
He heard her message loud and clear. She knew there was no future beyond what they would share here. She was wise beyond her years, and he hadn’t given her credit for knowing what lay ahead.
Lifting his glass, he tapped hers. “To the here and now.”
Their eyes locked, they each took a drink. Jonah felt as if he’d just made a pact, and he had no idea if it was a good one or a bad one. He knew only that this evening was not turning out the way he had planned. Gabriella Mendoza was a menace, not only to his peace of mind, but also his self-control.
The meal was delicious. After the toast, Gabby noticed a lessening of tension in Jonah’s face. Poor guy probably thought she was going to jump his bones any minute. She knew he was trying to do the right thing. That was Jonah Slater, noble to a fault.
“I can’t believe I made this.” He scooped another helping from the platter.
“It’s wonderful.” Gabby laughed softly. “And you’re definitely impressed with yourself.”
“Damn right I am. This is what real food is supposed to taste like. Those frozen dinners are a thing of the past.”
She took another bite of her meal and then put her fork down. The food had been wonderful, but she had enjoyed watching Jonah even more. Years from now, she would look back on their time together and smile. The memories would be poignant, sweet, and precious. In the short time she had left here, she wanted to make as many as she could.
Seeing that his plate was almost empty, she straightened her spine and took a giant leap, this time with her heart. “Jonah, are you attracted to me?” She knew the answer, but she needed to know where he stood. His reaction would help.
His mouth tensed, his fingers went stiff, his shoulders straightened. It seemed every part of him had a reaction to her words. She already knew the answer he would give, too.
“Gabby, you’re leaving soon, and we can’t—”
His hand was wrapped around his wine glass, his fingers so tense, she knew he would soon break the stem. Removing his hand from the glass, she held it gently in hers. “Years from now, I’m going to look back on tonight and I’ll either smile and remember the beauty we shared, or I’ll cry a little because we could have had something incredible and we didn’t. That’s your choice.”
“Tell me what happens when you leave here, Gabby. Because you know that outside this canyon, we have no future.”
“I’m not asking for a future with you, Jonah. I’m asking for tonight. And all the nights to come until I leave.”
Jonah’s chair screeched across the floor as he shoved it back. He threw his napkin over his plate and stood. Holding out his hand, he growled, “No going back. If this is what you want, then put your hand in mine. I’ve pushed you away as much as I can. But no more. While you’re here, you’re mine. Can you handle that?”
Placing her hand in his, she allowed him to draw her into his arms. Her hands cupping his face, she pulled him closer.
He resisted. “You didn’t answer my question. Can you handle that?”
Her face within inches of his, she whispered, “I can handle anything you give me, Jonah. Question is, can you handle me?”
She never knew who kissed whom. Their mouths came together, and her world exploded. Everything Jonah had been holding back from her he put into his kiss. All the passion, the need, the wonderful heat that only he could give.
Jonah shut down every warning, every ounce of conscience. He had denied himself for as long as he could. This was what she wanted, and he had wanted her for what seemed like years. Regrets could not be part of the equation.
Without another word, he scooped her into his arms and carried her out of the room.
“Where are we going?”
“My bedroom.”
He was surprised he was able to speak, even more surprised he could walk. His arousal was throbbing so hard, he ground his teeth to not give in to his baser desires. He wanted to lay her on the floor, any flat surface would do, and take her hard and deep. But Gabby deserved better.
He took the stairs two at a time. He had a moment of thankfulness that the door was open. Carrying her inside, he dropped her on the bed, and following her down, set his mouth on hers again. She gave as good as she got. Her mouth opening for him, she took his tongue, sucking and pulling him deeper inside.
He didn’t remember tugging at her clothes. He was concentrating too hard on the silkiness of her skin, the scent of her arousal, the moans she released from her throat. His mouth traveled from that lovely throat down to her breasts. Coherency came in a flash, and he stopped.
“What’s wrong?”
“I need to see you.”
“What?”
He couldn’t answer her if he tried. This moment was too special to rush. Ripping her clothes off and devouring her would satisfy a craving. But he wanted to savor every single second.
Sitting up, he feasted his eyes on the beautiful mounds before him. Luscious globes, creamy and perfect, just as he had imagined. His hands lifted them both, testing their weight, squeezing lightly. His thumbs brushed over her nipples, and he watched in delight as they tightened,
“Your breasts are sensitive.”
“Yes,” she breathed.
“Good.” He leaned over and licked one nipple gently. Her body arched, and she gasped.
“Very good,” he whispered. His lips latched on, and he suckled hard, pulling her deep into his mouth. The strangled moan she released urged him on, and his tongue flattened as he drew harder.
She couldn’t catch her breath. Had never felt anything more wonderful in her life. Every part of her body felt alive. She wanted him everywhere. His lips, his tongue, his hands, those beautiful, long fingers dancing across her skin. Glorying in the beauty she had only imagined, she caressed his body, touching him everywhere she had dreamed. The shirt he’d been wearing was off one shoulder. His pants were unzipped but still buttoned. And one of his shoes was gone. She wanted him naked. She wanted to see him, too.
When he lifted his head, she pushed him slightly away from her and looked down at herself. He had been much more successful at getting her clothes off. Her dress was bunched around her waist, her bra was gone, and though she couldn’t see that far down, she was fairly certain her panties were gone, too.
She giggled.
“What’s so funny?”
“You’ve got way more clothes on than I do.”
“Let me fix that.” Standing, he dropped his pants, his underwear, and then his shirt. In less than two seconds, he was completely nude. She wanted to say something amusing but had no words. She had once thought Jonah’s body was a work of art. She hadn’t been wrong. He was muscle and sinew, hard planes and intriguing indentations. Her artist’s eye immediately began to imagine painting him in the nude.
His penis was long and jutted past his naval. That was an appendage she had never carefully examined, had never wanted to exam. But with Jonah, there was nothing she didn’t want to touch, to kiss, to taste. She leaned forward and put her tongue on the very tip. His taste was salty and masculine. Moaning her approval, she went for another taste but never got the chance.
With a growl, Jonah pushed her back on the bed and leaned over her. “Look at me, Gabby.”
“That’s what I was doing.”
“That’s not what I mean.”
“Then what?”
“I need you to tell me if anything scares you. If I do something you don’t want or doesn’t feel right, you need to let me know. I promise I will stop.”
The sincerity in his face, the earnestness in his eyes, moved her to tears. She knew he was aroused, that he was holding on to his control by a thin thread. She also knew he meant what he said. He would stop, now or at any time. This man had given her so much, but one of the most wonderful things he had gifted her with was the ability to trust. After all she had been exposed to, all that she had seen, she’d never thought she would have that.
She had no fear, no trepidation. She could give him those words but wasn’t sure he would believe them. So she gave him her most confident smile instead and spoke softly, “Give me everything you have, Jonah. I want it all.”
He gave her another hard, long stare, and then apparently believing her, he proceeded to do what she asked. And oh mercy, he had so much to give.
Jonah knew he would never get enough of her. His mouth devoured every inch, his tongue adoring every sweet hollow and secretive dip. He licked, nibbled, and when he heard her gasping, he repeated the process. When he knew he could no longer hold back, he opened the drawer of his bedside table and grabbed a condom, ripping it open with his teeth.
Surprising him once again, she took the rubber from his hand and slid it over his length. Then, with her seductress smile, she pulled him down to her.
Jonah slid in slowly, working himself in increments. She was wet, aroused, and so tight he almost lost all control. Every particle of his body was telling him to thrust and ride them both to oblivion. Gabby might be on board with everything so far, but she was too delicate and untried for him to take her fast and hard like he wanted. He allowed her to adjust, watching her face for any sign of discomfort or pain. She showed him nothing but acceptance and a need that matched his own.
When he was at last buried to the hilt, he gritted his teeth and held himself still. He didn’t know what he was expecting from her. Maybe a little fear, perhaps a bit of uneasiness. Nothing could have prepared him for what she did.
“Why are you smiling?”
“Because you’re inside me, and it feels even more wonderful than I imagined.”
The only response he had to that was to kiss that smile and give her everything she asked for, all that he had.
Wrapping her arms around Jonah’s back, Gabby opened herself and gave in to the burning desire. She had never felt so wonderful, so free, so incredibly alive. The need was building to a crescendo inside her, like a blaze was taking over, consuming her. Having Jonah inside her, thrusting, plunging, giving her incredible pleasure, was the stuff of fantasies and dreams. And just like always, he was making them come true.
The blaze became an inferno, coalescing into an incredible, devastating climax. Her world exploded, and Gabby shouted as she was flung to the stars.
She returned to earth to hear Jonah saying her name over and over again. His big body stiffened, and she felt the pulsing inside her.
With the knowledge that she was unbelievably blessed, Gabby wrapped her arms and legs around him, holding tight. She had been right. Years from now, she would look upon this night and she would smile. Jonah had given her that, too.