Haley stormed over to the bed and dropped onto it with enough force she bounced. “Fuck!”

She hadn’t meant for things to get so out of control. She certainly hadn’t planned on talking about her feelings, or yelling, but everything had kind of exploded out of her -- including actual flames. That had been the last straw. The end of her ability to cope with anything else.

It didn’t excuse what she’d done, though. She’d accused Torel of lying to her, and now that she’d said it aloud, it didn’t feel right. She’d let her emotions run rampant, and that was never a good idea. Hell, in the past hour she’d broken just about every rule of journalism. Don’t get emotionally involved. Don’t make assumptions. Double check all your facts, and always get both sides of a story.

Her emotions were still bubbling over in a messy froth that made it impossible for her to think straight. One of the things she’d learned during her grief counselling sessions was to never make important decisions when emotional. It was time she followed that advice.

“I really hope he doesn’t come back and see me tied up like a pretzel,” she muttered as she sat up, folded her legs into the half lotus position, and set her hands atop her thighs, palms up. Once she was comfortable, she closed her eyes and tried to remember the breathing technique Aria had taught her during their sessions.

It took time to recall the pattern, and much longer to actually start to feel centered. By the time she was clearheaded again, some of the tension had left her body, and she paused to flex her shoulders and roll her head from side to side. Once she was relatively calm, she started working through her feelings, untangling them bit by bit. Anger at the idea Torel might have tricked her. Guilt about how she felt about her sexy alien match. Then there was the issue of what the hell she actually felt for Torel. Was it lust, or something more? Was it even real? What was she going to do if it was real?

She started to tense up and ended up going through the whole breathing thing again. She still felt silly, but like Aria always told her, you have to go with what works. “I’d feel better if I could talk to Aria about all this,” she mused aloud.

“Are you referring to the same Aria Frasier you wished me to locate earlier?” The computer’s query startled her.

“Uh, yeah. I am.”

“Would you like me to enable communications with her?”

She started to nod vigorously, then realized the computer needed a verbal response. “Hell, yes I’d like you to do that.”

“Sending a communication request, now.”

Before she had time to ask any other questions, the request went through and Aria’s face appeared on a monitor a few feet away from the bed. “Hi, Haley. Everything ok—shit. Clearly not. Why are you crying? And where’s Torel? Wait, is he the reason you’re crying?”

“No, everything is not okay. I’m not crying. Well, I was, but I stopped. I threw Tor out of his room, I uh, have no idea where he went. And to answer your last question, yes, he’s part of the reason I’m upset. Also, I set some paper on fire. And my arm. Turns out, I got the full Pyrosian freak package. Think I can get a job as a superhero when I get home? Girl of Flame? Captain Firestarter?”

“Home?” Aria frowned. “You’re going home? And what’s this about setting things on fire? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” She held up her hand. “No burns, see? I have no idea how I’m going to explain the gold eyes and new party trick to my parents, though. They’re going to lose their minds.”

“Probably,” Aria agreed. “But why are you planning on going back to Earth? Is Torel staying, too?”

“Torel’s not staying. At least, he hasn’t said anything about it. I’m going back because I don’t think this is going to work, and well, I don’t think I can trust him.”

“Why not?” Aria asked in a tone Haley hadn’t heard in a long time. Aria was in counselor mode, asking probing questions without judgement or comment.

“Torel and I only went through with this mating thing because we didn’t really have a choice. He promised me that once it was over, I was free to go home if that’s what I wanted.” She paused, then mentally cursed herself for a fool. She really had let her emotions get in the way of following the facts. She should have remembered that. It threw a big wrench into her theory that Tor and the others were tricking women into going back to Pyros with them. He’d told her he didn’t want her to leave, but he never once said she couldn’t.

“Is that what you want?”

“I don’t know. Torel had to leave for a couple of hours today, and while he was gone, I got bored and started looking around for something to do.”

“What did you find?” Aria asked.

“Torel’s research. He left it in our—his room. I started flipping through it. I couldn’t read any of it, but I got the ship’s computer to translate it for me.” She took a breath, not sure how to tell Aria what she’d discovered. “Did you know that the Pyrosians are studying human fertility and genetics? They’re even trying to find ways to manipulate our genetics to match more of us to their unclaimed males. Having read all that, I don’t know if I can trust Torel anymore.”

Aria pursed her lips in thought, then asked, “What did Torel say when you asked him about all this?”

Trust Aria to go straight for the question Haley didn’t want to answer. She twisted a lock of hair around her finger and sighed. “I might have hit him with a full broadside when he came back.”

Aria’s lips twitched a little. “How so?”

“I kind of accused him of plotting against humanity, and uh, that was the moment I lit up like a torch,” she confessed.

“You must have been very upset. That’s what happened to Gwen, too. She got angry, and that’s when her ability manifested.”

“Gwen? Spokeswoman for the Star-Crossed Dating Agency, that Gwen?”

“Yes. Did you know she’s got a little girl almost the same age as Melody?”

“You’ve spoken to other women? Are they happy? Do they know about the breeding plan they’re part of?”

“I’ve met with Princess Maggie, Gwen, and their friend, Lisa, and yes, they’re happy. I had doubts of my own, and they helped me work through some of them. In fact, I had just left them when I ran into you.”

Well, that shot another hole in her theory. “I was so sure…”

Aria’s expression softened. “I know. But what you’re saying doesn’t match with what I was told, or what I’ve seen. Believe me, these ladies aren’t the kind who would just agree to something like that. They’re smart, independent women who are very much in love with their mates.”

Shit. She sighed heavily as logic finally won over her suspicions. “I think I might owe Torel an apology. Or at the very least, a chance to explain. He asked for that, but I wasn’t in any mood to hear him out.”

“Do you know why you were so ready to believe the worst?” Aria asked.

“Not really.”

Her friend just stared at her in silence.

“Okay, maybe I have some idea,” she finally admitted.

Aria just continued to look at her, waiting.

“It’s about Jeff.” She threw her hands up in frustration. “Everything always seems to come back to him in the end.”

“How long has he been gone?”

“Three years. You know that.”

“So, why do you think you haven’t let yourself move on? Why does everything ‘come back to him,’ to use your words?”

“Because he was my husband, and I swore to love him forever. He was my soulmate.”

“And now you’re being told you’re destined to be with someone else. That can’t be easy to reconcile.”

“It’s not! People don’t get two soulmates, that’s not how it works.”

“Who made that rule?” Aria asked.

“I, uh. I don’t know.”

“People lose the ones they love every day. It doesn’t mean they never get to be in love again.” She smiled gently and threw her words back at her. “That’s not how it works.”

“But Jeff and I were a team. We were going to change the world. Tackling injustice and holding the ones in power accountable for their decisions. We were an unstoppable team…and then the cancer came and we weren’t unstoppable anymore.”

“I know. But Jeff didn’t want you to stop trying, did he?”

“No, but I didn’t know how to do it alone. I…I gave up.” The confession hurt. She’d known what she was doing for a while, now, but knowing it and naming it weren’t the same thing.

“You didn’t give up, you just put everything on pause.”

Now she’d admitted the truth, she didn’t bother trying to dress it up. “Three years isn’t a pause, it’s a choice.” Especially since during that time, she’d reverted back to the person she’d been before meeting Jeff. Returning to the family business, trying to appease her parents, focusing on work instead of living any kind of life.

“Let’s call it a non-choice. A holding pattern,” Aria said.

“Okay.”

Aria leaned toward the screen. “Are you ready to step back into the fray again and restart your life?”

She thought about that for a few minutes, pushing aside her fears and doubts to get to the real answer buried beneath. “I think I am, yeah.”

“Then the question you need to ask yourself is this. What does that life look like?”

Haley started to answer, but Aria put up her hand and shook her head. “Take some time and be sure of what you want before you answer. We’re standing on the brink of some seriously big changes.”

“You got that right. None of us had any idea how much was going to change when Piper came bursting into your kitchen that night. Speaking of Piper, have you heard from her? Is she okay?”

Aria beamed. “They found them. I was just about to contact you to let you know when you messaged me. She’s fine. So’s the alien dragon-dude who flew off with her.” She frowned. “I still don’t know how I feel about him. The man did abscond with my sister…” she shook her head. “It’s going to take me some time to process.”

“Yeah, I bet. But he’s bringing her home, safe and sound. That has to count for something.”

“It does. They’re coming back to the ship later today. We’re going to meet the shuttle when it arrives. Want to join us?”

“I wish I could, but I suspect by then Torel and I will be either having angry, Scorch-driven break up sex, or happy, Scorch-enhanced makeup sex.”

“Scorch driven? Are you still feeling the effects of that? I thought it only lasted two days?”

“It does. I didn’t meet Torel until I woke up in the medical center yesterday.”

“Well, that explains why you’re feeling everything so deeply right now. The mating fever made me so crazy that on day two I stormed out of Tarjen’s room with Melody in my arms and no idea where I was going to go next.”

Aria was the most level-headed, centered person she knew. If the Scorching had made her act like that… “That actually makes me feel a little better. Thanks. And thank you for talking me through this. I think I can work the rest out on my own, now.”

“Good. I’ve been waiting for this day to come. I’m glad I could help.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re very smart. And a good friend.” She raised her hand to wave to Aria. “Talk later?”

“You bet.” Aria disconnected first, which was probably a good thing since Haley had no idea how to end the call without asking the computer for help.

Once she was alone, she went through her breathing exercises for a third time. She needed to be clearheaded before she made any more decisions. As she breathed, though, something else started to affect her. Emotions that weren’t her own slid around the periphery of her awareness, like shadows at the outer circle of a campfire.

As the minutes passed, the feelings got stronger. Frustration, confusion, and other emotions too complex to decipher. She focused on the feelings, then gasped as she finally understood what was happening. Torel. She was experiencing the bond he’d told her about, and it was more intense than she had imagined.

She closed her eyes and tried to take in everything she was experiencing. It was quickly evident that despite her earlier suspicions, this was no trick accomplished with hormones or alien technology. It wasn’t part of some ruse to convince her and the other human women to stay with their mates. She was connected to Torel. She could feel him.

“How did he think this was going to be nothing more than an intergalactic friends with benefits scenario? He’s in my head!” She rubbed her brow as if it would somehow quiet the emotional noise pouring into her brain. That was when she remembered what he told her when he’d come back from the medical center. He didn’t want her to leave, because it would be hard on them both. She had been too angry to listen to him then. She’d even accused him of making it up.

She huffed in frustration, then got off the bed and started pacing. Every time she passed the stack of printouts and reports, she felt a twinge of regret. Torel had done nothing to deserve her distrust. He’d been honest and attentive from almost the first moment they’d found themselves thrust together. He never pushed her into anything she didn’t want to do, and there was no denying the chemistry between them was off the damned charts. She started another lap of the room, but this time she paused at the window to look down at Earth. What’s left for me down there?

The truth hit her like a slap in the face. There was nothing for her back home. She hadn’t led much of a life since Jeff’s death. Aria, Melody, and Piper were leaving. She could walk away from her apartment and her job in a second. Her parents would take a little longer. Maybe two minutes to say goodbye, and at least one of those minutes would be taken up with disapproving stares and bitter sighs of disappointment. Jeff’s grave might be down there, but he wasn’t there anymore. He had moved on to the next adventure. It was time she did the same.

“If I do that, what adventure do I want to move on to?” She lifted her gaze from the planet to the myriad of stars that gleamed in the darkness of space. Even as she stared into the void, she could feel Torel’s presence in her mind. If she went with him, she’d have a partner again. Someone who challenged her and made her laugh. He wasn’t carefree and wild like Jeff, but he was passionate about the things that mattered to him. She could feel enough of his emotions to know she was one of the things he cared about. When she looked past her fears and guilt, she felt the same way about him. It wasn’t love. Not yet, anyway. But it was more than she ever imagined she’d feel for anyone ever again.

It didn’t take long to make up her mind. There were no guarantees in life. Love and happiness weren’t certainties, but she wasn’t going to find either one if she didn’t take this chance. Jeff had taught her life was all about taking risks. Wherever he was right now, she hoped he’d be proud of her for taking this one.

She turned from the window and headed for the door. She needed to find Torel, apologize, and tell him she’d made a decision.