A live band played in the background of the fancy restaurant, The Seg. Plush velvet couches outlined the restaurant while tables were set in the center of the room, complete with full place settings.

The heat had died down, and Hawke and I were already old news. But it had been a week since our lip-locked picture was made public. A week since he had said he’d fix everything. A week since I’d heard his voice. I’d like to believe that he was keeping his distance to protect me, but it still hurt that he hadn’t once checked on me since then.

The hot summer sun of Paris seemed like eons before. Now, the leaves had begun to fall off the trees as we approached the middle of September.

It seemed to Hawke like we never existed, and to me, it was as if my world revolved around him. I googled Hawke constantly and watched every entertainment show to get a glimpse of him. I was irritated, but I couldn’t get mad. He’d never treated me badly. He had never promised me anything. It was my own fault for wishing for something that could not be.

I wanted more. I wasn’t this girl—a one-night random hook-up whenever he was in town. I was a relationship kind of girl. I needed stability. That was who I was in my core.

I stuffed the phone back to the bottom of my purse and promised myself I wouldn’t look at it again. I was here with Josh for Andy’s birthday party, and besides the two men, I didn’t know anyone.

The posh restaurant was packed with people who reeked of wealth. I took in all the women in their makeup, fitted cocktail dresses, and four-inch designer heels along with the thousand-dollar handbags slung over each of their shoulders. Most of them were standing next to guys who were as equally good-looking. All the men exuded power in their semiformal wear—some in pinstriped button-down shirts and crisp pressed pants while others were in a full-on suit and tie.

My hands flattened against my mid-length black skirt that hit right above the knees. I’d borrowed it from Chloe’s closet. She was a marketing exec and wore suits daily, so I had known I’d be able to find something appropriate to wear. The Seg was fancier than any floral summer dress in my closet, so I had outsourced for the occasion.

I glanced around, looking for Josh, but a tall blonde caught my eye. She was stunning with her Pantene-sleek hair that rested in the middle of her back and her scooped-neck cocktail dress that hugged her model frame.

Two men were vying for her attention, and I could understand why. She was beautiful.

Where my hair was a dull sandy-blonde, hers was a shiny platinum, almost white blonde, tucked behind her ears. She stood out from the rest, like the star actress on a movie set. Her black dress was accented with white pearls around her neck. Simple but elegant was how I’d describe her.

I straightened in my seat when Josh strolled back from the restroom.

He pulled out his chair and sat down. “Hey, thanks for coming. Did you see Andy’s face when you came in? He totally thought you wouldn’t show.”

I shrugged. “No problem. Maybe I should have dressed up a little more. I feel so…I don’t know.”

He ducked his head and angled in closer. “Pfft. These women have nothing on you. Trust me.” His intimate stare did not waver, holding a sensuous flame. He’d been staring at me like this since he picked me up from my apartment.

Where I didn’t fit in, Josh totally did. Hair slicked back, skinny tie and suit on. Whatever he did, you couldn’t take the wealth out of his appearance.

“So, this is your crowd?” I asked.

He rested back in his chair. “Nope. My crowd is Andy and Will. Will was the other guy that was with me on my birthday. These guys are just their friends.”

He pointed his beer bottle in my direction, and I clinked my wine glass against it.

“So, did Will come from Manhattan, too?”

“Nope. Andy and I went to prep school together. We met Willy while playing ball in Chicago.” He glanced back at his friends, who were laughing against the bar.

Seeing the three of them reminded me of Chloe and me back in high school.

“They’re good guys,” Josh said. “They know the crap I go through with my family. They were there for me when I didn’t know anyone here. When you met them on my birthday, they’d just had too much to drink, but at heart, they’d do anything for me.”

“Good friends are irreplaceable,” I said softly, fingering the thin white-gold necklace at my throat.

“That, they are.” He tipped back his beer and took another swig.

“Josh?”

I heard an elegant voice from behind me.

I peered up and blinked at the beautiful blonde from earlier, standing right by our table. Her eyes flickered from me to Josh, almost hesitant to look back at me again.

“I haven’t seen you in ages,” she said. Even her smile was perfect with her Crest White teeth. Her eyes were almost angelic—the deepest blue I’d ever seen.

Josh openly blinked. “Jenny…” His voice visibly shook in a lowered whisper.

I recognized her name. Most definitely his ex.

There was no doubt that he hadn’t expected her to be here. He stood and jammed his hands into his pockets. Josh was always affectionate with his friends, so this closed-off version was a huge contrast.

“It’s been a while.” His eyes scanned the area, looking anywhere but at her. “How have you been?”

“Good. Really good.” She wrung her hands together and shifted her weight on her four-inch black heels.

He glanced back at Andy, who raised his palms up, as if to say, I had no idea.

Josh’s jaw tightened. Andy approached, but Josh turned, forcing his attention on the immaculate blonde.

“What’re you doing in Chicago?”

“I was in town, visiting Jeanine, and she invited me. She didn’t think it would be a problem since we all know each other. I’m sorry…” Her voice trailed off.

That was when Josh placed a hand on her shoulder.

“It’s fine,” he said, his tone turning apologetic. “I’m just surprised to see you; that’s all. I’m sure the birthday boy is happy about our little high school reunion.” He attempted a smile, but it still seemed forced.

She placed her hand over his, and her face relaxed into a huge smile, as though his touch were all she craved. And then I knew. I knew that she still loved him.

She released a lighthearted laugh and focused back on me. “Hi,” she said, leaning over, “I’m Jenny.”

The beautiful girl exuded kindness. It was in her sweet voice and in her delicate features and her kind demeanor. For the first time, I was kind of jealous that I didn’t have the same appeal.

Josh hit the top of his forehead. “Sorry, my bad. Sam, this is Jenny.”

When I stood, he crossed to my side and slung an arm around my shoulders, pulling me closer.

I cocked an eyebrow, gave him a side glance. “It’s very nice to meet you. I’m Josh’s friend.”

When she extended her hand, I shook it.

As soon as the words left my mouth, Jenny’s face brightened. “It’s so great to meet you.”

Jenny sidestepped when the waitress arrived with our plates. Josh sat down first, and I followed his lead. Jenny blew out a soft breath and gazed at Josh with longing, as though he were all that she ever wanted in the world.

“It was great seeing you, Jenny.” Josh picked up his fork to speed up their interaction, and my chest ached for a girl I didn’t even know.

“Yeah, it was great seeing you, too.” She swallowed, false bravado in her tone. “And you, too, Sam. I hope you have a great time tonight. The band sounds amazing. And free drinks, right?”

“That’s right.” I raised my glass in her direction.

Her eyes dropped to the ground. “I guess…I guess I’ll let you guys get to your meals.”

Josh had already stuffed food in his mouth, and it seemed a little rude, so unlike his normal gentlemanly behavior. He was out of his element, and it shocked me.

Jenny turned and walked away, and then she straightened and walked back toward us. “Josh…uh…”

He jammed his mouth full of pasta. I was afraid he was going to choke.

Jenny sucked in her bottom lip and placed a hand on his arm. “Can I please talk to you for a second?”

Josh’s eyes darted around the room, looking anywhere but into Jenny’s sweet face. I shifted with unease at the awkward silence that was building between them as she waited for his response.

Finally, he reached for his water and gulped it down. I swore, I saw the sweat forming on his brow.

Jenny’s hand dropped from his arm to his wrist. “Please. I just want to talk.” All her vulnerability was displayed in her clear blue eyes that were begging him to listen.

He blew out a breath and then closed his eyes. When he opened them, they were conflicted.

Finally, he nodded.

“This will take just a couple of minutes. I really hope it’s okay if I steal him for a second,” she said, her voice hesitant, her eyes hopeful.

I nonchalantly waved one hand. “Yeah, sure.”

Josh stood, reached over, and squeezed my hand. “I’ll be right back.”

When he winked in plain view for Jenny to see, her smile faltered.

I wanted to ignore the stark difference in his reaction to her versus his playfulness with me. I also wanted to ignore the way her eyes flashed with hurt because she had noticed, too.

When they walked to the bar, I ducked my head into my soup, pretending to eat. I placed my phone on the table and focused on the screen, trying to look inconspicuous. I was not being a snoop. I was not studying their reactions. I was so not trying to strain my ears to hear their conversation.

It was as if I were watching a movie play out. No words needed to be heard to understand what was going on. At first, the conversation seemed light, and she said something to make the corners of his mouth lift. When she angled closer and touched his arm he flinched and jammed his hands in his pockets again, as if the last thing he wanted was for her to touch him.

He nodded while she spoke, but he dropped his focus to the ground, unable to look her in the eye.

Things heated up quickly. When she placed both hands on her chest, my heart hurt for her. I could tell she was speaking with certainty and conviction. I could see it all over her face and in the way she leaned toward him, wanting to be heard.

When she reached for him, he backed away and placed both palms up.

I made out two words.

I can’t.

That was when Jenny crumbled and cowered inwardly. She dropped her face into her hands and sobbed openly. Chaos erupted, and two girls rushed toward her side.

Josh looked visibly distraught.

He stormed my way and tilted his head toward the door. “Sorry, Sam, but we have to go.” He was unable to look me in the eye. “I’ll get you dinner somewhere else. I’ll say bye to Andy and Will, but then we…”

Andy rushed toward Josh’s side. “Yo, man, I’m sorry.” He looked deflated. “I had no idea she would be here or that she was in town.”

When I peered up, Jenny was gone, and the party had returned to partying. Who knew where she had disappeared to?

“I believe you, but…we just have to go,” he said, voice rushed. His eyes darted around himself. “Happy Birthday, bud.”

Andy slapped Josh’s back and brought him into a half-hug.

In the next second, Josh intertwined our fingers and pulled us out of the restaurant and down the street. He seemed helpless for a second, not sure of where to go or what to do or what to say, so I took the lead and stepped on the curb.

“Hey, can we get tacos?” I asked, trying to smile. “I know a place.”

“Yeah. Yeah, sure,” he spoke. Yet he was not present; he was distant and upset.

As we waited for a cab, he tipped back his head, staring into the evening sky at the stars above us. He was quiet, his eyes lost in thought.

I placed one hand on his shoulder to try to get him back to the present. “Hey, you okay?”

When his eyes met mine, he let out an audible breath. “Yeah.”

A cab pulled to the curb, and he opened the door to let me slide in. “I’ll be better when we get out of here. Where’s that taco place?”

“Oh, you’re in for a treat, mister.” I recited the address to the cab driver as Josh scooted in next to me.

I was rewarded with those two dimples I adored. The old Josh was back.

The cab driver drove us through the city, and Josh pulled me closer to his side. He rested his chin on the top of my head, and I relaxed in his hold as we watched the flicker of the car lights in front of us.

The small hole-in-the-wall taco place was packed, and the scent of grease and cumin permeated the air. I breathed in deeply, the smell only increasing the rumble in my stomach.

Josh reached for my hand and ushered us through the crowd.

I chuckled. “We totally fit in here, don’t you think? You, in your designer shirt, and me, in my fancy dress.”

He laughed. “Yeah.”

My goal of the evening was to make Josh laugh every single minute. I didn’t want a repeat of the unfamiliar Josh from earlier.

“What do you want?” he asked.

“The King Burrito with extra hot sauce.”

“You like it hot, huh?” He winked. “I’ll remember that.”

He turned to the cashier and said, “Make that two.”

“Hey, wait for the food. I’m going to seat-stalk those two over there.” I motioned to two girls sitting in the corner. They looked like they were about ready to leave, so I needed to move quickly before someone else stole our seat.

“Okay.” He held my eyes. So many emotions passed between us, some of them I didn’t even understand. In the next beat, he pulled me into an embrace. “Thanks,” he breathed.

My face was smooshed against his chest, and I wrapped both arms around his waist and squeezed. “You’re the one who’s paying for my dinner.”

Against my cheek, his chest rumbled with his laughter, laughter that I’d missed.

I pulled away, and as I stared into his eyes, I knew, more than anything, that things between us were changing. We were getting closer with the intimacy of what we’d shared with each other. As I held his stare, I knew he felt it, too—the shift in our relationship. But, with my chaotic life, I wasn’t ready to even think about being anything more than friends.

“I’d better get us those seats, or we’ll be standing and eating.”

Right as I turned away, I saw the girls get up and gather their belongings.

When they stood, I shoved myself into the small space in the corner of the restaurant. “Thanks,” I said as they cleared out their belongings.

Josh plopped down on the bench opposite me, dropping the bulging brown paper bag. The bottom of the bag was darkened with oil, and my stomach cheered, pom-poms and all.

I rubbed my hands together and tore the brown paper bag open. “Ready?” My eyebrows danced.

“I was born ready.” He loosened his tie, unbuttoned the top button of his shirt, and rolled up his sleeves.

As he relaxed in the chair, my curiosity about Jenny crept up to the surface. I wanted to know their deal. She was gorgeous and seemed sweet to boot. They were like a real-life Ken and Barbie couple.

“I didn’t know you were such a heartbreaker.”

When he shot me a look, I immediately regretted the words that slipped from my mouth.

He dropped his burrito midair, and he rubbed an aggravated palm against his forehead. “Sometimes, I feel like it would be better, being on the other side and having your heart broken instead.”

“You’re only saying that because you’ve probably never had your heart broken.”

“I haven’t,” he admitted with a grimace.

It was visibly noticeable that it upset him to hurt her, and I didn’t know what to do to help him. “I’m sorry. You don’t have to talk about it.”

“No, I need to. I want someone to tell me I’m not a monster because I totally feel like I’m the biggest douche in the world.”

Trying to lighten the mood, I said, “And what if you are? What if you’re the king douche bag of douche-bag central?”

“Sam…” His face contorted.

I gently shook his arm. “I’m totally kidding. Anyone who knows you knows that’s far from the truth.”

He stared blankly at the uneaten burrito in front of him. “I’m sure Jenny doesn’t think so.”

“So, what happened between you two?” I nodded toward his meal. “Eat and talk. You don’t want to be a hungry douche. That’s worse than being king douche, trust me.”

His voice became distant. “It’s fine, seeing her, but I didn’t expect her to beg for me to come back when it’s been months.”

I pushed his food closer to his mouth. “Talk with your mouth full. I’ll allow it for today.” I pointed to his food. “Eat!”

He gave me a devastatingly sad smile and took a bite.

“Did she cheat on you?” That was the first thing that had crossed my mind, especially since she had been begging him to come back.

“I wish. Honestly, that would’ve been easier.”

I pointed to his burrito, and he chomped down again.

“So, what happened? She has an extra toe or what?” I prompted.

He swallowed down the food and laughed. “No, but that would’ve been an interesting story.” His stare became distant. “She’s beautiful and sweet and everything any guy could ever wish for.” He met my eyes, unwavering. “But she just wasn’t for me. I wasn’t the guy for her.”

I needed to know the reason she wasn’t enough. “What do you mean?”

“We were together for most of high school. Did I love her? Yeah. But I wasn’t in love with her.” He shook his head. “I tried. I really did.” He leaned back in his chair, his burrito totally abandoned now. “Imagine this beautiful girl begging you not to leave her and saying that she’d do anything…anything to make it work.”

My facial features dropped, recalling my own memories. I’d been brokenhearted one too many times, and I could empathize.

“I don’t get it.” Because I didn’t. She was sweet and drop-dead model beautiful.

“No one did.” He rubbed the back of his neck with one hand and let out an exaggerated sigh. “I thought something was wrong with me. She could have any guy, and she picked me, but…she wasn’t the one.” He shrugged, as if in apology.

A soft exhale escaped me. Unrequited love stunk majorly. “That sucks balls.”

“Pretty much.” He averted his gaze, staring anywhere but into my face. “Did you know I cheated on her?”

Okay, wow. I reeled back, my response automatic.

He winced at my reaction. “Not my proudest moment, let me tell you.” He narrowed his eyes, absently playing with his napkin on the table. “Not full-on cheating. But going on a date with someone else is still cheating even though nothing physical went on. It happened a while ago, in high school, with this cheerleader named Chrissy.” He scrubbed one hand over his face. “I don’t know if I did it, so Jenny would leave me for good or because I wanted to see if something better was out there.”

“So, which one was it?” I angled closer, waiting for his answer and needing to know.

“Both,” he said. “And, after all of that…Jenny still wanted me back. She cried for days and blamed it on Chrissy. True, Chrissy was aggressive, but it takes two. I’d like to believe, if I was truly happy in our relationship, I never would’ve strayed. It’s like I voodooed her or planted some sort of love potion.”

“Or maybe you’ve just got the charm, Josh Stanton. Among other things,” I said, trying to lighten the mood. I motioned to his body and scrunched my nose.

He let out a carefree laugh. “Sam, you’re a genius. That has to be it. Now, if you’re curious”—his eyebrows danced—“I can totally tame that curiosity.”

“No”—I laughed, reaching for my burrito and bringing it up to my lips—“I think I’m good.”

“I don’t think you really are.” He grinned, two dimples now.

When he ran his hands down his chest and suggestively touched himself, I busted out in full-blown laughter, some of the lettuce falling out of my mouth mid bite.

“Really? I don’t know why that Jenny girl is so hung up on you.”

“I don’t either.” He rested both hands on the table and leaned in, his face thoughtful. “You know that saying, When you know, you know?” The intimate look in his eyes warmed me from the inside out. “Well, I just knew Jenny wasn’t the one. I knew she was out there somewhere, and I’d just know.”

He took a savoring deep breath, his gaze riveted on my face. Something intense flared through his stare that made my heart jolt and pulse pound against the insides of my wrists.

I tore my eyes from him and took a bite of my burrito, a tingling sensation sweeping up the back of my neck and across my face. “So, you believe in fate and stuff?”

He shrugged. “I never thought of it that way, but yeah…I guess I do. Or maybe not even that. I’d say I believe in soul mates.” He sucked in his bottom lip, his face thoughtful. “If you had seen my mom and dad together, you’d know. They were meant for each other.” His voice choked with emotion. “When I tell my dad to date because I truly want him to be happy, he asks me, ‘What’s the point?’ He says his better half is gone, that person isn’t walking the earth anymore.” He picked at the napkin on the table. “He says anybody else would just be a stand-in.”

I placed my hand on his, lightly brushing my thumb over his fist.

Death sucked because it was the people who the dead had left behind that were the most affected.

“When she and my father met, he knew.” His eyebrows knit together, and he focused on my hand on top of his. “For Mom, it was slow-moving. She didn’t know it was him at first. She told me she wasn’t into the rich-and-stuffy type.” A chuckle left his lips. “But she’d tell you that fate was fate and that she stood no chance. He was meant for her. And I knew that Jenny wasn’t meant for me and that’s why I had to leave her.”

He surprised me by placing his other hand on top of mine, sandwiching my hand in the middle. “It feels good to talk about my mom.” Such sadness filled his eyes that I had to swallow back the lump in my throat. “I can’t do this with many people. I always feel like I’m depressing them.”

I exhaled a shaky breath. “It’s because I know how you feel.”

“I know you do. And Jenny’s a great girl. I want her to be happy. Someday, some guy is going to swoop her up and treat her right.” A whoosh of breath released from his mouth, and then he glanced in my direction, his eyes boring into mine. “Funny thing is…the day I finally cleaned out my old room and got rid of a box of stuff Jenny gave me from high school, is the same day I met you.”

My heart beat loudly in my ears from his intensely unwavering stare. “Josh…” I tore my gaze away from his and clasped my hands together. “Your life is what you make it. It has nothing to do with me.”

He smiled and touched the tip of my nose, forcing me to meet his eyes. “But what if you’re wrong? What if things are destined?”

“I don’t think so.”

Drive and determination had brought me to Chicago. Yes, it was to escape the tragedy of my mother’s death, but I was going to make a life for myself—by myself.

“I’m going to go to a top-notch culinary school, specialize in pastries and serve as head chef one day at a restaurant of my choice. That isn’t fate, Josh. That’s pure will.”

“I don’t doubt for one second that you’ll head up a restaurant one day. But I believe in fate, Sam. I do. Especially when it comes to finding that one person.”

“Josh, just like how you choose your profession, you choose the person you want to be with.”

I’d watched my father choose a new woman and my mother choose her fate.

Fate didn’t choose you; you chose it. Maybe I’d been tainted by my childhood, but that was all I’d ever known.

He stared at me for a second longer than was comfortable, and then he blinked. He seemed so sure of himself. “How about we see which theory wins?”