Six Years Later

 

Nate took a deep breath, the mountain air filling his lungs. The elevation was going to take some getting used to, but he couldn’t argue with the fact that Bliss, Colorado, was a beautiful place. He looked out at the little town nestled in the Sangre de Cristo Mountains. Every way he turned, there was a stunning view. Stefan hadn’t lied about that.

He slid out of his truck and straightened his tie. There was no more putting this off. It was his first day and he wasn’t going to be late. No matter how much he didn’t want this job, it was his and he would do it right. Like his name. Which was the only damn thing he had left now.

His boots crunched into the gravel that covered the parking lot of the Bliss County Sheriff’s Office. It was a building just off Main Street. Inauspicious and small. This was his workplace now.

Shit, why was he so nervous? This was a huge step down, and he was practically shaking at the thought of meeting his staff.

What staff? According to former sheriff Rye Harper, he had an administrative assistant and one deputy.

Rye Harper. He had been Bliss’s sheriff for years, but now he was quitting to train horses and spend time with his new wife. Callie had been in love with Rye Harper when she’d been young. But according to Stef, she wasn’t the new wife. Damn, when was he going to forget that girl? Now that he was here, he couldn’t stop the questions. Where was she? Had she come back to Bliss after that weekend they’d all shared? Would he be sitting in his office one day, look out the window and see her strolling by? What would he do?

It didn’t matter. She probably wouldn’t remember them anyway. Callie Sheppard was most likely married by now with a couple of kids. She would be thirty-one, and she would have gotten on with her life. She was probably still so pretty it would hurt to look at her.

If he did run into her, he would be respectful. God knew if he hadn’t been good for her back then, he would be poisonous now. He didn’t even know what to call Zane.

Toxic, maybe. He hoped the right word wasn’t unsalvageable. The thought of Zane back at the cabin sent a weary sigh through him. This plan had better work. If Zane didn’t start getting better, he wasn’t sure what he would try. This was his last shot as far as Nate could see.

He stopped outside of the station house, the enormity of the last few years hitting him fresh and hard.

It was all gone. His money, their careers, possibly Zane’s future. He had to make this work. There wasn’t another choice. Guilt gnawed at his gut, and he wondered if the restless nights were finally catching up with him. He was so tired he wanted to sleep and pretend none of this was happening to them.

The door to the station house opened, and he was greeted by a tall man with reddish-brown hair and a friendly smile. “Sheriff Wright?”

That was his name now. He was the sheriff of a Podunk town, and he needed to be grateful for the job. “Yes. You Harper?”

Rye Harper held out his hand, and Nate shook it quickly. He couldn’t help but assess the other man. This was the man Callie had loved. Tall, strong, with a laid-back cowboy vibe. He was sure Rye Harper had never had trouble attracting women. Still, what kind of idiot couldn’t love that girl back?

“Welcome to Bliss, Sheriff Wright. We’re really happy you were willing to take the job.” Harper grinned broadly. “Me, especially. If Stef hadn’t convinced you to work out the rest of my term, those bastards were going to hold me to my contract. Can you imagine that? I didn’t think the people here knew what a contract was. Anyway, I’m sure you’ll like it here. It’s pretty quiet. Come on inside, and I’ll introduce you.”

He wasn’t so sure he’d like it anywhere. He might have passed the point in his life where he could have been happy. Still, he followed. It had been like this for months, ever since the day Zane’s cover had been blown and their world had gone to hell. Since that day, he forced himself to shuffle through his days, a zombie moving more out of habit than any great desire.

Harper was talking as he walked through the door. “I’ll be around if you need anything, but Callie can run this place with one hand tied behind her back, so I don’t expect you’ll have any trouble.”

“What?” He heard the words come out of his mouth, but his attention was focused on one thing and one thing only. Her.

She wouldn’t be strolling by. He wouldn’t catch a glimpse of her some day. She was here. Right here.

He was stopped in his tracks, the world shifting and upending.

She was here.

“Nate?” Callie stood by the front desk. She was slightly older, but more beautiful than he remembered her. A prim skirt and a sweater hid her curves, but he knew they were there. He dreamed about them at night. No woman he’d slept with since could measure up. Just like that, he could feel her hips under his hands, tracing her skin while she moved over him. He could hear her laugh, see the way her skin seemed to glitter when the sunshine hit it in the right way. He could feel her arms around him.

The world seemed to narrow down to that one face. A bit of panic threatened to take over. She hadn’t changed, but he had. He wasn’t the same man who’d rolled in the sheets with her, who teased and played with her. He could feel his heart pounding in his chest.

“You two know each other?” Harper’s sharp gaze moved from him to Callie and back again.

“Stef introduced us a long time ago,” Callie said softly. She was wearing glasses. She hadn’t worn them before.

He wanted to strip them off, along with that shapeless sweater.

“A very long time ago.” Nate tried to recover. It would look bad to break down in front of his staff on his first day on the job. His mental breakdown could surely wait a week or two. He nodded briskly and put on a purely professional front. “Hello, Callie. It’s good to see you again. I hope you’re well.”

Her face flushed. He could plainly see that it wasn’t the greeting she expected. Her voice was strained when she replied. “I’m fine, Sheriff. Nice to see you.”

Rye Harper slapped his hands together. “Well, then, I leave you in good hands, Sheriff.” He was at the door in a shot, as though he couldn’t wait to get the hell out. “You call me if you need anything, Callie. And be sure to explain to him about the nudists. There’s a science fair the Farley twins are planning to enter. We’ll likely have trouble there. Some idiot relative bought them a chemistry set. We’ll be lucky if they don’t blow up their barn. Oh, and we’re coming up on Nell and Henry’s annual mega protest. I think they’re planning on chaining themselves to a tree or something.”

The former sheriff looked damn happy he wouldn’t be dealing with those problems. He grinned and was gone in a second.

And Nate was left alone with the only woman he’d ever loved.

He was going to kill Stefan Talbot.

“I didn’t know your last name.” She was quiet, but he heard every word. The station was empty other than the two of them. It was a far cry from the DEA office. And it was so far from the field.

So she was surprised, too. “Sorry. If I had known─”

Her eyes grew wide. “What? You would have warned me?”

The truth popped out of his mouth. He’d forgotten how to be polite. “I wouldn’t have taken the job.”

The blood left her face and the room went quiet. “Well, all right then. That’s good to know.”

He spoke quickly, taking a step toward her. Two seconds in and he was already fucking everything up. “Callie, it’s not like that. I wouldn’t want to hurt you again.”

She shrugged. “You didn’t hurt me in the first place, Sheriff. We had a fling a long time ago. That was all.”

Damn, she wasn’t any better at lying now than she was then. The hurt was written all over her face. He wanted to pull her into his arms and apologize. He kept his distance. “You’re right. It was a long time ago and it shouldn’t affect us today. I’m sorry to surprise you like this. Can we try to work together? I need this job. Harper said you can help me fit in around here.”

“You need this job? I seem to remember you had a rather large trust fund. You told me you worked because it gave you purpose. I don’t know that you’re going to find that here,” she said, her voice turning bland and unemotional.

“No more trust fund.” He’d admit that much to her. He hadn’t had any control over that. He hoped she never found out about the rest. “Bad investments. My father’s company is gone. I’m going to work out the former sheriff’s term, and we’ll take it from there. I promise to treat you as professionally as the last sheriff.”

She snorted, and a smile curved her lips. “That wouldn’t be hard. The last sheriff used to pull my pigtails when we were babies. It’s hard to keep it professional when you grew up together.”

He hated Rye Harper. “Well, I’ll be a good boss. Now what was he talking about? He said something about nudists and science experiments.”

Maybe if he acted in a professional manner, she would go along. He had no idea how he was supposed to work with her. The idea of seeing her every day and having to hear about her husband or boyfriend…he wasn’t sure he could do it.

Callie’s hands went to the buttons of her sweater. She fingered them as though she really wanted out of the garment. He remembered that Callie felt more comfortable naked. She’d spent the entire weekend with them without a stitch of clothes on. Nate felt his cock swell at the thought.

Well, at least it still worked.

“Don’t worry about it. He’s trying to scare you. I already talked to Nancy Farley. She’s keeping an eye on the boys. Nell and Henry are protesting logging practices by chaining themselves to a tree, but it’s not one that’s about to be cut down. This particular protest is meant to make us think about the trees. Also, I have an extra key in case I need to get them out quickly, though Henry is surprisingly good at escaping the things. As for the rest of it, well, it’s nudists’ retreat time. Sometimes they scare the tourists.”

He stared at her for a moment, trying to figure out if she was joking with him. Nope. She seemed extremely serious. What the hell kind of town was this? “Well, if I catch them, they can spend some time in an orange jumpsuit. It’s illegal to walk around like that. They need to keep to their place.”

Callie stood up straighter. Her eyes lit up, and her hands were suddenly on her hips. “I think you’ll find that a little tolerance will go a long way in Bliss, Sheriff Wright.”

His tolerance was long gone. He hadn’t been here fifteen minutes, but he could already tell the former sheriff had been very lax. “If I find someone breaking the law, I’m going to arrest them.”

Callie’s arms were crossed, and her lips pursed. “That should make for an interesting change then. Now, if you like, I’ll show you around.” She waved her hand. “That’s around. There’s your office. Your uniforms are hanging on the back door. Your deputy’s name is Logan Green. He’s on his lunch break. I’m going to lunch, too. I’ll be back at two.”

She was leaving? He just got here.

“Try to not arrest the whole town while I’m gone.”

She walked out, and he was alone again.

 

* * * *

 

Callie tried not to cry, but as she shuffled down the street, the world swam in front of her. Shock. This was what shock felt like. Not the physical kind. The heartbreakingly emotional kind.

Why hadn’t Stef warned her? Seeing Nathan Wright after all these years had just about floored her. When he’d walked in, her first impulse was to throw herself into his arms and plant a big kiss on those sensual lips of his. She’d been taken back to that weekend six years ago when he’d walked in and smiled at her and made her feel like she was a queen.

Then she caught sight of the coldness in his blue eyes. He hadn’t smiled once. What the hell had happened to the man she’d met?

If he’d known she was there, he wouldn’t have come. Knowing that made her feel smaller than she ever had. Her heart constricted. She wouldn’t go back. She would call in and quit over the phone.

There was no way she could work with him. He could find an admin he liked more and she could…she could move on to whatever happened next.

She felt someone fall into step beside her. As though she’d conjured him, Stefan Talbot glided alongside, measuring his step to match hers. He’d probably been waiting outside the station house, watching for her. Callie turned away and tried walking faster.

“Callie…” Stefan’s smooth voice practically begged her.

“Go away, Stef.” She knew he played deep games from time to time. She never expected he would play them with her. Betrayal burned through her. It hurt, maybe even worse than Nate’s total rejection. She had no illusions that Nate loved her.

“I can’t. You should stop and talk to me, or I’ll follow you around until you do.” There was no threat, merely a simple promise. Stefan was used to getting his way. When he didn’t, he tended to do whatever it took to force things to fall into place. Stefan liked a well-ordered house. “Let’s go to Stella’s. I’ll buy you lunch and explain why I didn’t tell you Nate and Zane were coming to town.”

She stopped in the middle of the street. “Zane’s here, too?”

“I suspect, though I haven’t seen him. I doubt Nate would have left him behind.”

“I don’t want lunch. I want to go home for a while. If you follow me, you better tell me what you know.” She gave Stefan her sternest look. Her best friend was a good foot taller than she was and every inch the elegant man. He had a face that made every woman who saw him sigh. Though she knew he was gorgeous, all she could see was the brother she should have had. Stefan Talbot was one year and two months older than she was. He had watched out for her almost all of her life. It would be good to know why he had stopped now.

“I didn’t tell you because I thought you would quit.” He had a habit of knowing what she was thinking.

“Why would I do that?”

“Because you were in love with Nate and Zane. Because you never got over those two.”

And he knew her better than anyone in the world. Tears welled up again. When would she get that hard outer shell so many people got? When would she be able to contain her feelings? She turned and started back down the street toward the small cabin she’d lived in all of her life.

Stef was right beside her. His hand found her back. “I think he needs you. I don’t know about Zane, Callie. I don’t know him the way I know Nate. Zane’s kind of a mystery to me, but I know Nate has been through a lot. He was involved in a deep cover operation for the DEA. From what I understand, it ended poorly. Zane was injured, and Nate blames himself. Couple that with the fact that Nate’s family and finances imploded and he’s not in a good place.”

“Is Zane all right?” The thought of big, gorgeous Zane being hurt made her ache. Did he have some woman holding his hand? She hoped so. She hoped he was being taken care of. She wished she was the woman but wouldn’t have him be alone for anything in the world.

“I think he’s back on his feet physically.” Stefan was silent for a moment. “The rest is a real question. Nate called me looking for a job. He wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t desperate, and I think part of that desperation has to do with Zane. Like I said, I’m not close to Zane but I know how I would feel if I felt like I was losing my best friend. I would do anything to save her. Please, Callie. I think they need this place. And in order for him to start to fit in here, he’s going to need you.”

Callie began to slow despite the fact that she wanted so badly to stay irritated with him. Mostly she wanted to follow through on her first impulse and go hide in her cabin until she could run away.

“You should have told me. If you had said those things to me, I would have agreed and I would have been ready to see him.” She might not agree with them, but he hadn’t meant to hurt her. He slipped his hand into hers and pulled it to his chest.

“I made a mistake. I honestly worried you would leave. I know you’ve thought about it since your mom died.”

She’d thought about it a lot. It wasn’t that she wanted to leave Bliss. It was simply she wasn’t sure there was anything more here for her.

He squeezed her hand. “I didn’t want to give you any reason to go. Please don’t be mad at me. I can’t stand it when you’re mad at me. You and Rye and Max are my whole world.”

Poor little rich boy. She couldn’t help but smile. Stef had given up a lot to keep his handpicked family together. “You’re a jerk.”

“I know.” His smile was slightly sad. “So you’ll stay?”

“For a while.” It was all she could promise.

 

* * * *

 

 The door to the small cabin came open, and Zane slammed down the book he had been reading. Was it really that late? He looked out the window, and sure enough, the sun was going down. He hadn’t noticed the shadows elongating. Damn, he’d gotten lost. It was the story of his life lately.

“Zane?” Nate’s voice rang through the cabin. It wasn’t hard. There were only three rooms and a single bathroom.

Zane got up from the small desk that dominated the bedroom he’d chosen for himself and walked into the main room. It was tiny but served as both living room and kitchen. Naturally he hadn’t done any of the stuff he’d promised he’d do. He’d been reading a lot since he got out of the hospital. It took his mind off…well, everything.

He rushed into the kitchen and opened the fridge. “Sorry. I’ll have dinner ready in a minute.”

Nate held up a bag. “You don’t have to. I got burgers. The burger joint is supposed to be first class. I figured you’d forget.”

Zane hated the feeling that rolled through his system. Useless. He was completely fucking useless. His legs worked again, but he was still half a fucking man. He couldn’t even remember to cook dinner.

“Don’t worry about it,” Nate said as though reading his mind.

But he would. He pulled two beers out of the fridge. If Nate could put on that pansy-ass uniform and play at being a small-town sheriff, he could at least open the beer.

Nate was already plowing through his burger when Zane sat down. “Bad day?”

Nate shrugged. He was shut down, but Zane expected that. They hadn’t talked, really talked, in months, not since long before he came out of the coma. He was okay with that. He didn’t really want to talk, either. Talking wouldn’t help anything. Talking wouldn’t fix the things he’d broken. It wouldn’t explain how they’d broken in the first place. That was what haunted him at night. The why was going to kill him because he was fairly certain there was no answer forthcoming.

Nate’s eyes slid off to the side when he started to look Zane in the face. “It was fine. It’s a shit-ass job. Nothing to it.”

“Did you…” How did he ask it? Damn, but he wanted to know. “Did you hear anything about her?”

Nate let the burger fall out of his hands. He reached for the beer. “Her?”

He said it like he didn’t know, but there was a hardness to his eyes that let Zane know he was lying with that question. It was a manipulation to see if he could get Zane to say her name.

“You know who I’m talking about,” he replied, trying to keep his tone as bland as possible. “I know it was your first day, but I thought at least you might ask if she’s still here. Don’t you want to know?”

“Maybe I do and maybe I don’t, but if I did I would find out myself. I wouldn’t sit in this cabin and pretend like I don’t exist. If you want to know if she’s still here, go into town and find out for yourself.” Nate stood and stalked off to his room, his dinner half-eaten and forgotten.

Zane didn’t touch his. Damn it. It was still there. Even after all these years, Callie Sheppard was still between them. How was he supposed to tell Nate that he wouldn’t go after her? The man should know. Fuck. Callie wouldn’t want him now. All it took was one look in the mirror to know no woman would want him now. His face was ruined, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever really had a heart to speak of.

He stood up and walked to the front door. He pushed through the screen door and moved out onto the small wooden porch. The previous owner had left behind a couple of crappy lawn chairs. He lowered himself into one, hoping it would hold his weight. He had a sudden vision of three Adirondack chairs, side by side by side. Three places for three people to watch the brilliant sunset. Three places for people to rest and be together at the end of a long day.

He took a swallow of beer.

Why wouldn’t Nate put him out of his misery and tell him whether or not Callie was still in this mountain town? Was she married? Did she have a couple of kids? Did she think of him fondly or wish she’d never met him?

He settled into the chair, which showed no signs of faltering. The night air was cooling off. The beer was cold as it flowed down his throat. Everything was still here and yet in constant motion. It was odd. The world moved, but he could be still and nothing forced him to run. All the time he’d been in the hospital a ragged restlessness had ruled him. He hadn’t wanted to be in bed and then he hadn’t wanted to stand. Anything they brought him wasn’t quite good enough. No food could fill his gut. No drug could quite make him sleep easy. He’d been on the knife’s edge, cutting himself because he’d been too afraid to fall off.

Not here. Here things slowed down and the air was sweeter. He’d woken early this morning and a deer had been on the lawn. They’d stood there for the longest time, deer and man existing in the same place, considering each other. It had been a peaceful moment.

He could finally fucking think in this place.

But he worried if he left the mountain, he would have to face the fact that he wasn’t the man he’d been.

What did he want? He sure as hell didn’t want to be a burden to Nate for the rest of his life. Nate blamed himself for what happened, but he shouldn’t. If Zane had been in the same situation, he would have made the same call and yet…

Nate wasn’t the one who had to look in the mirror every day and see a monster staring back at him. Nate wasn’t the one who knew how fucking mortal and helpless he could be. Nate wasn’t the one who had broken.

Zane’s eyes slid to the motorcycle that stood beside Nate’s beat up truck. He could get on it and ride off. He could go anywhere and never have to be responsible again. There would be no expectations of him being the man he’d been before the end of the mission. No one would know him or care about him, and there was a certain amount of temptation to the idea.

But he owed Nate. He needed to make sure Nate was going to get his life back on track. He would make sure Nate was settled down here in Colorado.

Then he could disappear.