Freddie
The next week was a blur.
But in a good way, not that 'I am too busy and can't even enjoy a moment of my day' kind of blur.
I went from adept enough at handling the often overwhelming input of orders at work to an old hand at it, the pride something pure and unmistakable.
Abby praised me - in her characteristic, offhand sort of way - and then had teased me endlessly about blushing in response to it.
Then I would get home, shower, spend a little time with Thaddeus.
Then Ty would be at my door.
I wasn't sure what I had been expecting after the first night. I guess a part of me had actually figured I would wake up alone.
Not to the sound of voices in the living room.
Thad.
Colson.
Ty.
Then, I figured, maybe all the family squabbling might also be a turn off for him, might send him running. Especially since it wasn't something he was used to. I fought with my brothers practically since the cradle. It was as common as a casual conversation for us. But Ty had never really had a chance for a traditional family. And his arguments with biker brothers likely led to blows, not heartfelt conversations like most of my family fights ended.
Case and point, me and Colson after Ty left.
Thad had handed me a coffee, then walked us both over to the dining table, forcing us each down into seats across from each other, then declared, "Sort your fucking shit out. I need to go do a full-body shave and lotion."
With that mental image, he left us alone, full of raw feelings, uncertainty, offense, and more than a pinch of anger on both our sides.
Then, well, we had the hard talk.
Spanning ten years of uncertainty and misunderstandings.
By the end, we had both gotten it all out, all the resentments, hurts, disappointments.
It was all fine.
Until we got to the subject of Ty.
"He's an arms dealer, Winnie."
"I'm aware of that. I'm an ex-con."
"No you're not," he insisted.
"But I am. On paper. According to society. I am."
"But you're not really a criminal, Win. He is."
"You don't even know him and you think we're better than him. That's close-minded."
"It's not close-minded to call a criminal a criminal," he insisted. "We all make choices in life. And we do that knowing people will judge us based on them. Whether you like that, or agree with that, or not. That's how it is. And people who work for a living view people who choose to make a living illegally as less. That's how it is."
"Why is what he does any worse than the gun stores?" I shot back. "And don't bother talking about background checks we both know are a joke. No one blames the gun store when someone takes one of those guns and shoots up a school or does a drive-by or shoots their wife dead in a drunken rage."
"Buying them illegally makes it harder for the cops to do their job," he insisted, losing steam and he knew it.
"Yes. They do a real bang-up job around here," I said with a snort. "There's a street gang in town selling Easy Lay and they aren't doing anything about it. But you know who plans to? The Henchmen. Because maybe they sell guns to people who would find them regardless, but they also have morals. They stand up for women. They don't let things get too crazy around here."
"You can't call a vigilante a hero."
"Why the hell not? I don't know what world you are living in, Colson, but the one I have been in has been a lot uglier, I guess. Do you know how many women I was housed with who were molested as kids, raped as young women, beaten by their husbands? And even if they reported it, nothing was done. Do I think it would be wrong for someone to deal with those men in a less than legal way? No. No, I don't. Vigilantes exist because the law stumbles and falls flat on its face sometimes. And no one should get away with it just because of a technicality. So, yeah, anyone who sees a wrong and rights it is a hero in my book. Whether they wear a badge or not."
Colson looked away for a long minute, putting his thoughts together, before coming back with, "I can't fucking lose you again, okay? You get that? I know you were inside and that was its own kind of hell. But it wasn't great being out here, knowing you were stuck there, knowing I couldn't protect you, couldn't help you. And it sucked that you couldn't be here. Couldn't come out with Thad and me when he finally came out, have something called a Strictly Dickly Cocktail at a gay club a couple towns over. Couldn't celebrate Christmas with us. New Years. Your birthday. That you didn't get to see Jelly as a baby, watch her turn into the sweet little hellion she is now. It sucked for you, but it sucked for us too. And I can't deal with that again. You getting involved with a criminal means there is a chance that you could get wrapped up in something and go away again."
"Fool, did you not hear that fine ass man say that he would never let her go down for his shit?" Thad asked, coming out of the bathroom with a burst of steam, rubbing oil over the top of his head and down his cheeks. It was his anti-aging miracle solution he mixed from four different oils. "My heart went pitter-patter at that shit."
"What he says and what he does are different things. I'm sure Tanner never told you he was going to let you go away for his crimes."
Tanner, I felt, was a sore spot not just because of what he had done to me. But because Colson had met him. Had been charmed by him just like everyone else. Had approved of me dating him.
The betrayal had to have hurt him as well. Filled him with guilt. He didn't want to feel that way again. He didn't want to think that his approval of a guy was a factor in why I dated them, why I may end up in prison because of them.
"I'm not asking you to approve of Ty..."
"Oh, he has a real name. Ty. I like that," Thad butted in, shameless in his eavesdropping as ever.
"But I am asking that you trust me to make my own decisions. I have no intentions of going to prison again for a guy I'm dating. Trust me."
"So... you think this is something?" Colson asked, carefully. "Not just a..."
"Fuck-buddy situation," Thad supplied for him, knowing Colson was not quite as easy talking about his little sister's sex life as he was.
"Yeah, more or less," Colson agreed.
"Honestly? I don't know. In case you forgot, I am new at all of this. And he isn't exactly..."
"A serial dater," Thad supplied.
"Exactly. So this is new for both of us. We don't know what this is or where it is heading yet. But... there's... I feel like there is something here worth exploring."
"You sure that isn't just the orgasms talking, sweet pea?" Thad asked.
"Who invited you into this conversation?" I asked, shooting him small eyes, but smiling. "I felt it before things... escalated," I supplied, feeling more uncomfortable than I ever recalled feeling around them before. "I'm not saying I am going to marry the man and have a dozen future arms-dealing bikers. I'm just... I like him. And it's been a long time since I got a chance to like anything or anyone."
"And she deserves a little happy," Thad added, jabbing Colson in the shoulder with his elbow as he passed.
"Yeah, you do deserve some happy," Colson agreed, giving me a small smile. "I won't keep snapping at him when I see him."
"That is the best he can do," Thad said, sitting down. "Accept it. Now both of you have a hug. Then you gotta go pick up my cute niece from her play date, so we can go to the park."
So we hugged.
And we moved forward.
The next time he saw Ty, he wasn't exactly all warm and fuzzy - but, really, no one would ever call Colson warm and fuzzy unless they saw him with Jelena - but he kept his opinions to himself, didn't grill him, even shared a meal with us.
Which brought me to Ty.
Every time I thought of him, my brain did that cheesy thing that early two-thousands romance movies did, showing him in slow motion, doing basic things like buttoning his shirt or sitting down at his desk, making seemingly banal tasks look incredibly sexy.
I slow-motion thought of his hands sinking into my hips, his lips pressing into my neck, the look of complete satisfaction when he finally got me naked a second time after a long stalling game from Thaddeus who clearly enjoyed the daggers I shot at him as he kept insisting we had to watch just one more episode of some show he liked that I could barely pay attention to because Ty's hands were absentmindedly stroking over my neck and shoulder.
I expected some belated awkwardness as Thad finally went off to sleep and we were alone, but Ty's lips pressed into the spot right under my ear, and he casually asked if I wanted to go to bed too.
As if there was any chance I didn't as my body was pure liquid beside his.
There was no slow teasing. There were no tentative touches, feeling each other out.
The door barely closed before our hands started ripping at clothing, greedy for skin to touch, taste, feel pressed against our own.
I managed to get off his shirt before he reached for mine, pulling it up over my head, but not my arms, yanking it back down, pinning them to my sides as he dragged off my yoga pants, sinking down to his knees before me, yanking up my leg, pushing it over his back, and burying his face between my thighs, driving me up... up... up.
Then stopping, nipping into my inner thigh when I whimpered in disappointment.
Then back he went to my clit, circling, sucking, flicking with his tongue.
Up, up, up.
Then pulling away again, a low chuckle moving through him when my leg sank into his back, trying to pull him closer, make him finish, give me the fireworks he kept denying me.
By the third denial, my poor, confused body was trembling with the need for release.
Then and only then did he slowly get back onto his feet, freeing me of my shirt before discarding the rest of his clothes, lips sealing over mine as he scooted me backward toward my bed.
It wasn't until the backs of my legs touched the side that he ripped his mouth from mine, grabbing me, turning me, folding me forward onto the bed on my hands and knees, ass up in the air toward him.
"Great fucking view," he growled, one of his hands slapping down on my ass, massaging the smart away for a long moment. His other hand slipped forward then down my belly, moving between my thighs, gliding two fingers inside of me, thrusting lazily until my muscles started to tighten again, threaten oblivion.
I had prepared myself for his refusal.
But the denial was no less torturous to my overly sensitive system.
My hands curled into the sheets, my forearms moving down onto the mattress, pressing my ass further out toward him.
A low, rolling growl moved through him, his body half-turning, snagging one of the condoms off the nightstand, protecting us just a second before his hand sank into my hip, holding me still as he shoved inside me with one hard, thick, demanding thrust.
The angle allowed him so deep that there was a foreign, delicious little pinch that I felt myself pushing back against, my hips wiggling in a small circle as his body stilled, taking a deep, steadying breath.
His one hand stayed planted, the other landed another loud whack to my ass, the pain making my body jerk, jolt backward, forcing him even deeper, something that I was sure wasn't possible.
"Work your clit for me," he demanded, voice rough, needy, a sound that made my belly swirl around deliciously, taking away any sense of hesitation, embarrassment as my weight shifted onto one arm, the other slipping down my body, fingers touching his cock where our bodies met before gliding upward, stroking over my clit as he started to thrust.
Hard. Fast.
The bed slamming back against the wall, something that would surely wake up Thad if he had even gotten to sleep yet already.
But I couldn't seem to work up a care as Ty fucked me harder, faster, as my body tensed for another orgasm I wasn't sure it would be allowed to have.
But even as the thought formed, Ty's hand pressed down on top of mine, pushing it harder against my clit - the unexpected contact making the orgasm slam through my system, making my breath catch, my muscles tense, my voice get strangled in my throat, something like a choking noise only managing to come out as the waves crashed and crashed, as Ty kept fucking me through it, dragging it out, before he planted deep, hissing out my name as he came.
His body folded forward with the impact of his climax, his head resting between my shoulder blades as he fought to get his breathing back to normal.
"Didn't think it was possible, but that might have been better than last night," he declared as he slid out of me, my boneless body falling over onto my side, watching as he moved away to the trash bin he knew was on the other side of my nightstand now, then coming back to the bed. "Move over," he demanded with a slow, lazy smile, smacking my ass until I complied, scooting over to leave just enough space for him to climb in behind me on his side, knees under mine, chest to my back, arm over my belly.
Spooning.
It was a silly word.
And one he would probably hate if I murmured about it aloud.
But I let the smile spread, a private little joy, as he sputtered some of my hair out of his mouth before finally settling still, his chin on top of my head.
"Hey Ty?" I called a while later, long enough that I was sure he was asleep, which would have let my long-contemplated question fall on deaf ears.
"Yeah?"
Damnit.
Now I had to ask him.
"What are we supposed to do now?"
There was a short pause. "I was planning on getting some sleep, waking up, fucking you again, then going back to sleep," he declared lazily, completely oblivious to the sparks his words set off through a system that should have been satiated. At least for the night.
"That's not what I meant," I admitted, voice small.
"What'd you mean?"
"Just... in general. What are we supposed to do now?"
"Fuck if I know," he admitted. And, well, his admission of cluelessness somehow managed to comfort me. "But I think we'll be doing a lot of fucking. Maybe getting out of this apartment a bit. Doing shit in the world. Maybe you can come and re-meet some of my brothers eventually. And their women who will be banging down your door in about a week, I am told, if you do not show up and meet them for yourself. And I mean that literally. They will run a check, find out your address, and fucking show up here."
So, it seemed, we just... fell into a swing of things. Into a, dare I even think it, relationship.
My heart, the silly, unpracticed, hopeful little thing it was, swelled at the idea of getting more of this man. Of getting everything.
"We could go to the clubhouse tomorrow instead of here," I suggested, not wanting him to know about my heart and its premature yearnings. "I'm off actually. So... we can go whenever."
"Sounds like a plan. So can I sleep now? I need a good three or four hours if you want me on top. Less if you're willing to ride," he added, giving my belly a squeeze.
I felt it in my chest too.
It was there.
In my bed.
With Ty behind me, falling easily asleep, that I realized I was in too deep. Deeper than I should have been.
"Bitch, you would lose a single minute of being close to that fine ass naked man?" Thad asked an hour later as I sat on the kitchen counter in my panties and Ty's shirt, cradling a cup of tea in my hands. "Is that peppermint?" he asked, sniffing my cup. "Your stomach bothering you?"
"I have feelings for him," I admitted.
"And that is making you sick to your stomach?" he asked, brow raising.
"It's too soon to have feelings."
"It's maybe too soon to want to marry him and give him a litter of babies. But it's never too soon for feelings, boo. I got feelings for that fine ass man at the post office. He could handle my package any-fucking-time."
I snorted at that, taking a sip of peppermint that I hated, but drank whenever my belly felt wobbly. And wobbly was what it felt right about then.
"I meant real feelings, Thad. Like heart fluttery feelings."
"Fred, if your heart ain't fluttering, he wouldn't be worth spending time with at all, right? The heart flutter is what you want at this stage. Down the road is when you can admire his ability to piss in the bowl or scrape your windshield in the winter. Right now, it's about the flutter. Down the road is when you start to see a note about being out of TP as a sign of love since he doesn't want you wiping your ass with a coffee filter. That is down-the-road love. Flutters, flutters is fine right now."
"I've known him less than two weeks."
"Did you declare your undying love to him when he rang the bell?"
"What? No."
"Then cut the shit, boo. This is not a big deal. Feel what you feel. No one can tell you it is too soon to feel how you feel if it is how you feel. But don't be talking about how you feel for a bit. That's my advice to you. And, honey child, I have a lot more experience with the menfolk than you. So you can trust me. Pour that shit down the drain. You need a glass of wine to make you sleepy," he decided, reaching for the glasses.
So I had wine, got sleepy, and went back to bed only to be woken up two hours later.
But I sure wasn't complaining.
Nor was I complaining when he woke me up early with a cup of coffee made the right way and yet another orgasm.
"You can't still be come-drunk, baby girl. Get up. You got nothing in the house."
"There is plenty in the house," I objected. "The veggie drawers are full. There's fruit on the counter."
"Babe, you're making my point. There's nothing in the house. Let's get lunch. Then head over to the clubhouse. You want me to pack some shit for you?"
"If I let you pack for me, there would be no bra or panties," I objected, begrudgingly sliding my legs off the side of the bed.
"Yeah, well, it's stupid to pack shit you won't need," he agreed, eyes dancing.
"You want me walking around the clubhouse around your buddies without a bra on?" I shot back, watching as the dancing stopped.
"Alright. Bra. But there is no need for panties," he insisted. "Just more layers to peel off."
"I don't mind the peeling," I told him, getting to my feet, grabbing the oversized hobo bag Thad had picked up for me, tossing some clothes inside of it, then going into the bathroom to shower, throw necessary toiletries in it as well, then coming back out to find Ty dressed and ready to go.
We went to lunch, talking about the new menu items Abby was considering. About the changes in the town in general. He gave me a rundown on the organizations and how they interconnected. He told me about the women in the girls club. Which, admittedly, filled me with a feeling of inadequacy. They all sounded like certified badasses who had all sorts of skills or training. And here I was. A short order cook. Ex-con. And... that was about it.
"Got nothing to worry about," he told me, seeming to read my thoughts. "They didn't all start off as what they are now. And there are some who don't really have any skills or shit. Rey and Penny and Kennedy come to mind. Bethany. I mean, they all train now. But it's more of a bonding thing with them now. They don't go out and get their hair and nails done, sip mimosas at brunch. They head up to Hailstorm and try to beat the shit out of each other. Figure it might be why there is almost no in-fighting with them. Any hard feelings get worked out in a physical way. Keeps 'em all happy."
"I wouldn't hate learning some self-defense," I admitted.
It seemed smart, now that I really knew what kind of town I was living in. What threats were around every corner. It would be nice to know I had more than a puny pocketknife to protect myself with.
"They'll be happy to teach you the ropes. You ready?"
To meet a clubhouse full of stone cold sober bikers who all had to be curious about me?
"Not at all," I admitted, sliding out of my booth. "But let's go."
As I expected, Ty must have gotten word back to his friends - likely through Sugar - that he was bringing me over for the night. Because the place was packed whereas he told me it was generally just the single guys who hung around all the time now.
And that list was short.
Roan.
Cam.
And, I guess, West.
I wasn't really sure if they counted him in anything yet until he was out of the prospecting phase.
But he was there. So was Cam, sitting in the living room. West offered me a simple Hey pretty lady. Cam opened the lid of a box of donuts, silently - of course - offering me one.
"No thanks. We just had breakfast. It's nice seeing you again, though.
"Alright, who's ready to see the woman who made good old Don't-Give-A-Fuck Virgin give a fuc... shit," another voice trailed off, looking at me guiltily. I knew him from sight.
Roderick.
"I'd apologize, but it's the truth," he admitted, shrugging it off. "You came in here knowing you'd be facing all of us? Brave woman," he decided, reaching for a donut for himself.
"Alright, so you know Roderick, Cam, West. This is..." Ty started, motioning to a man who really needed no introduction.
"Sugar," I cut him off, sending the man a genuine smile. "Ty told me a lot about the trouble you guys got into when you were younger."
"Ty did, did Ty?" Sugar asked, shooting his friend a raised brow.
I wasn't sure, but I figured maybe Ty giving me his real name, his government name, meant something.
"Your name is Ty?" West asked, almost seeming amused by that fact.
"What's your real name?" I shot back, defensive.
"Apparently, we only give real names to the women we shack up with so they call us it when they come," he told me with a smirk. "So by you asking, I can only assume that Ty here hasn't been performing like you..."
"Easy," Sugar called, making my head snap in his direction, finding him with a palm slammed into Ty's chest, holding him back.
Yes, holding him back.
The most calm, laid-back, didn't-give-a-fuck person I had met had his fists balled, chest puffed, jaw set to stone. Like he was planning on beating the hell out of West for just a comment.
"Who isn't behaving?" yet another voice asked, coming out of the hallway. He was tall, thin, red-haired, tattooed. Attractive. With almost unsettlingly sharp eyes, like he could see right in under your skin. "Dad is here, we need to behave," he added, drawing my attention to the man following him out. Tall, dark, handsome, and a bit, well, terrifying. I didn't have to know to know that was the president. Reign. He carried himself like he owned the place. Because, well, he did.
"The fuck you say now, West?" Reign asked in a sort of resigned father way, the tone he used on a particularly trying, rule-breaking child. "You didn't get enough from Lou earlier?"
Lou.
I rolled through the list of names I had been trying to remember.
Lou wasn't a guy. It was Adler's woman. A bounty hunter.
"I just asked her an innocent question," West insisted, but his lips were twitching.
"You asked her if she liked it when someone used her own cuffs on her in bed," Renny corrected.
"What did he do?" Reign asked, looking at me, then Ty. I was never so thankful for someone to look away from me before. I felt like a little girl facing up the principal. Even though I hadn't done anything wrong.
"Ran his mouth," Ty told his boss.
"Clearly. The fuck never had a mother wash it out with soap as a kid, and it shows. Look, I don't really give a fuck what happened, but you need to remember that you're a prospect, not a brother. You show respect. You bite your fuckin' tongue if what you are about to say insults the patched members. Or their women. Not only do they have a say in your future here, but I'm not protecting your ass from a beating if they get pissed off at you." With that, he turned his attention back to Ty. "Kinda interesting to see you riled up though," he said, shrugging it off. "I'm assuming if you got your girl here, you want off the patrol tonight?"
"I'll cover for him," Sugar offered. "Peyton is going to a - and I quote - Pussy Pleasure Party. Whatever the fuck that is, I don't think I want to be involved. I'll hang back tonight."
"Alright, sounds good. West, doesn't the bathroom need to be re-grouted?" Reign asked.
"Which bathroom?" West asked, dread already in his tone, knowing the answer.
And Reign, yeah, there was pure joy at hearing it.
"You're gonna need a lot of fuckin' grout," he added, moving past him and out into the yard, chuckling a little to himself.
"Don't think he likes me very much," West decided, but sounded completely unbothered by the fact.
"Think he just likes taking you down a peg or two," Roderick supplied. "And, not for nothing, but you kind of need it."
"What? Me? I'm pleasant as fuck. Right, Freddie?"
"Sure. A real delight," I said, only half teasing. He actually did seem nice enough. He ran off at the mouth, didn't think things through, was a shameless flirt, but it all seemed in good humor. Even if maybe Lou and Ty didn't take it that way.
"Yo, West," Sugar called when he went to walk away.
"Yeah?"
"What did Lou do to you?" he asked.
"He got acquainted with those cuffs of hers," Renny supplied. "As she locked him to her wing mirror and made his ass run as she drove across town. He looked ready to drop by the time she got to the yard to unlock him."
I was pretty sure Lou was going to be someone interesting to know.
"Lost five pounds in sweat," West agreed, shaking his head.
"He's a dick," Renny declared, but without malice.
"So are you. Yet here you are," Roderick told him, smiling.
"That's fair enough," Renny agreed. "So, what's your story?"
"None of your business," Ty chimed in immediately.
"It's not like they aren't going to find out if what you said about them running background checks is right."
"It's right," Renny confirmed. "And we always like when someone has the balls to tell us up front."
"I just got out of prison," I supplied, finding the words easier than they would have been just days before.
"No shit?" Sugar asked, making it clear that Ty hadn't been talking about me, about us. I couldn't help but wonder if that was a good or bad thing. "How long?"
"Ten years."
"You were a baby," Roderick said, shaking his head.
"Just turned eighteen."
"What'd you go away for?" Renny probed. That was how it felt, too. Probing. Like an invasion.
"None of your business," Ty declared. "That is for Reign to know if he wants to."
"Alright," Renny agreed, holding up a hand, letting it drop.
"So... we hear you cook," Roderick said.
"She's not here to cook for us," Ty objected.
"I don't mind. If I'm going to be here, the least I can do is cook dinner," I said, tone light, countering Ty's unusual severity.
"See, she doesn't mind," Roderick said with a victorious smile.
"Come on, let's go put your bag down," Ty said suddenly, reaching down to grab my hand, pulling me with him down the hall.
"What's the matter?" I asked once we were out of earshot.
"They're grilling you," he grumbled, pushing open a door, pulling me inside.
"So? I kind of knew that was how it was going to be. They're curious."
"You don't owe them answers about your past."
Why?
Because this was temporary?
If he planned to keep me around in the long term, his friends would all know about my past, right?
"What's this?" Ty asked, moving closer, pressing a finger between my brows where two lines had to have been formed.
"Not..."
"Nope. We're not doing that. Straight answers. That's what we've done so far. Think it's a good system."
"If I am going to be... sticking around for a while, wouldn't they all figure it out eventually?"
"Yeah," he agreed, nodding. "But on your terms. And after you've talked to Reign. The guys - especially Renny who likes to dig too deep into everything - will take that information and twist it before it got to Reign."
And Reign was hard about drugs.
I guess that made sense.
Jumping to conclusions was only going to create undue stress.
"Still didn't explain the frowning," he told me, head ducking low, forcing me to keep eye contact.
"It's nothing. I just... wondered if you didn't want me to tell them because you didn't plan on me being around long enough to."
He was silent for a minute, considering. "Tell you what. If you start wondering about something, ask. Seen too many people get into stupid ass fights over something that could have easily been worked out if they talked about it. I'd prefer not to be those assholes."
I liked that.
He was right.
Fights because people refused to have an adult conversation were ridiculous, unnecessary.
"Speaking of fights," I said, smiling a little. "Were you really planning on getting into one with West?"
"No." My heart sank a little at that, realizing some primitive, cavewoman part of me had thrilled at the idea of him fighting for me. As base as that might have been. "I was going to knock his ass out. There wouldn't have been any fighting," he added with a smirk, like he knew I would like that.
"You don't need to get into fights over my honor. I can handle myself."
"Sure. But I don't mind handling shit too. These are my people. They need to show you respect. I will make sure of that. Well, except the women. Can't make them do shit. You're on your own with them," he added with a head shake.
"I'm kind of excited to meet them," I admitted. "Especially after the handcuff story."
"Just... don't say I didn't warn you," he said ominously, leaving me to wonder what he meant.
About a week to the day later, I would find out.
And he did, indeed, warn me.
But nothing could have prepared me.
Nothing.
For a woman with mermaid hair and tattoos.
Named Peyton.