Chapter 33

Gabe

I sat in my living room, swigging from a bottle of beer and staring at the brown water mark beneath the line of the ceiling against the wall. Piece of shit condo. I could tap into my trust fund and get something better. But I wouldn’t. I didn’t want anything I hadn’t earned myself. Anything purchased with his dirty money.

No, I’d chosen this apartment because it was far away from my father and close to work and the guys at the fire station. Real down-to-earth people. People who actually cared about me.

Allegra had called and texted multiple times. I was avoiding her. I didn’t know what the hell to say to ease her pain. The rash of tears had reduced me to a quivering puddle, terrified to tell her the whole sordid truth. Even though I knew I was close to losing what I’d never actually had, I couldn’t reach out. The pain of the finality of her telling me to ‘fuck off’ felt worse than the pain of ignoring her.

Faith had introduced me to a world of mistrust and looking over my shoulder. A world where I didn’t like how I behaved. Even the man that I was. What with all the randoms floating around her, leeching off her, I’d started to become wary of everyone. But in the past … the desire to win my dad’s approval and love had outweighed the suffering of simply being with Faith. No more.

“Damn,” I felt like I’d been punched in the gut again so I leaned back and sank deeper into the leather sofa cushions.

A loud rap at the door jolted me from my self-recriminations. Who the hell was knocking at the door and hadn’t called first? I rose from the sofa, set my beer on a coaster and looked through the peephole.

Shit.

Another knock rattled the door and whoever it was on the other side tried the door handle. Stalk much? She must have heard noise on the inside so she wasn’t going away without the face-to-face confrontation she’d came for. Well, she’d get what she was after.

“What do you want?” I asked as I swung the front door wide and allowed her to step inside the foyer. Jesus. Didn’t this woman have any maternity clothes that fit her? Club wear didn’t look attractive on someone at the end of pregnancy. I was surprised George let her run around in public with her tits hanging out and her pregnant belly exposed.

“You aren’t happy to see me,” she smirked as she waltzed into the living room uninvited and sank down on my couch. Right next to my open beer bottle. “Can you get me a bottle of water, Gabe?”

“What do you want?” I repeated, making no move to go to the kitchen and do her bidding.

“Are you seriously going to let a heavily pregnant woman go without water?” She crinkled her eyes and glared at me. Let her stare herself into oblivion. I’m not her lackey.

“Yes.”

“Come on, sweetheart, we need to talk,” she ignored my slight, then patted the cushion beside her. She glanced around the condo and then turned up her nose at the lack of professionally done décor. I’d been to her place once to pick her up and George had spared no expense in setting up his daughter to live a spoiled life of leisure and ennui.

“What are you doing here, Faith? I’m not in the mood.” I gritted my teeth, picked up my beer and chose the recliner. Alone.

“We need to talk about the paternity test.”

“It wasn’t a request,” I said, “I have every right to ask for a paternity test and I will get one.”

She lifted an eyebrow. “I beg to differ and so does your father. He knows what’s good for you and that’s me,” she patted her chest, splaying her fingers which sparkled with a massive Cartier ring. A leopard with green emeralds for eyes and spots of glittering diamonds. That damn thing cost four times my annual salary.

“My father can get fucked,” I announced as I took another long sip, needing the alcoholic fortification simply to deal with her bullshit. Then the ring caught my eye again. “Who did you have to spread your legs for to get that ring, Faith?”

Faith’s mouth twitched at the corners. “As sexy as you are when you’re deliberately rude, I know that’s not the real Gabe. The sweet nerdy, math whiz that I fell in love with back in high school. Remember, before you became the star of the football team? You would have been rimming the toilet with an epic swirly if it wasn’t for me. I saved you, Gabe.”

What did she want, a damn medal? Maybe a spotlight and streamers?

I finished the last sip and then slammed the bottle down. “I’m not going to marry you because my father told me to.”

“Why not?” Faith pouted. “We’ve been together for years. You’re not the same man without me. Just look at how negative, emotional and surly you’ve become since you started sleeping with that white trash whore.”

You’re right, Faith. I’m not the same man because of you. You make me worse. A shell of the confident, proud and loyal man I was before I made the mistake of fucking you. Fucking my friend.

“Don’t say another word about Allegra. Don’t even speak her name or I’ll throw you out into the hallway, pregnant or not.”

She cleared her throat and scooted forward on the cushion, gripping the bottom of her belly. “This baby, your baby, needs a father.”

“If that’s my baby, he’ll have a father.”

Faith gave a triumphant grin.

“But, you will not have a husband. At least, I won’t be your husband.”

Faith’s face fell, her mouth went slack for a moment, then tightened up again. She leaned towards me and reached over to grasp my forearm. I couldn’t sink back any further into my recliner without tipping it backward and ending up in a heap on my area rug. She ran the pads of her fingers over the light hairs on my arm. Her touch made me want to blow chunks. “Gabe, be serious for a second. Think of the money we could make out of this. Your father —”

“You’re a shameless bitch. How can you think for one second I would prostitute myself for my father’s money? That I would put my own son in the same position that I’ve been in for years? Nothing that’s mine will ever be beholden to that bastard,” I used my calm but deadly serious tone as I rose from the chair and went to stand at the floor to ceiling windows. This condo and the amazing view, one of the only luxuries I still allowed myself on my fireman’s salary. I couldn’t hear any sounds behind me and hoped she’d decided to take that as her cue to leave. But when I glanced over my shoulder, Faith still sat there. Immobile.

Tense seconds passed before she spoke again with a soft and imploring voice. “Gabe, you’re not thinking straight, so I’ll leave you alone for tonight. Just think of the amazing family we could have together. With our son,” she murmured.

No we couldn’t. Because my heart is closed where you’re concerned.

I felt like that same heart was being ripped from my chest. I didn’t even know who she was anymore. If I’d ever even known her at all. “And all the money you’d make out of the deal when my father pays you off,” I replied. My voice lowered. “Get out of my apartment, Faith. I’ve had enough for today.”

She rose slowly and lifted her palms into the air. “All right, I know when I’m not wanted.” Now she was going to play the guilt card? Too damn bad for her because she’d already played it so many times it had lost all of its value. “But I’ll be back tomorrow and the next day, until you see sense about this. So prepare yourself.”

“I won’t be here.” I’d go check into a damn hotel if that’s what it took to avoid her and her drama. The results of the paternity test couldn’t come fast enough.

She paused in the doorway and looked at me, eyes brimming with crocodile tears. “I won’t let you give up on us, Gabe.”

I turned and looked out my windows again. Silent.

She opened the door, and the soft click of the latch let me know I was again alone with my thoughts. And emotions. The ones I didn’t want to feel but always came rising to the surface like a hurricane of distasteful feelings whenever Faith was present.

I walked to the kitchen counter and leaned on it for a second, staring at the half-empty fridge. My iPhone buzzed in my front pocket. Damn it. She wasn’t even in her town car yet and she was already trying to feed me another dose of her toxic bullshit?

Allegra’s gorgeous face flashed on the screen. I’d snapped the photo of her in the bakery making cupcakes. She’d looked so happy; her face glowing and passionate. I hadn’t been able to resist making it my notification for any incoming call or message from her. She’d tried calling me quite a few times since I’d held her while she cried about Matthew. I felt so impotent because I hadn’t been able to protect her. Hadn’t been able to exact revenge against that despicable prick.

I hit the green button to talk.

Allegra, I’m falling in love with you, but I’m afraid you’ll reject me if you find out the truth about me.

“Hello.”