Chapter Five
Fuck a duck, what was he doing?
Striding away from the pub, Baz ground his teeth. Balled his fists.
Fuck.
“Fuck fuck fuck,” he muttered, scrunching up his face and shaking his head.
“So, is this how you do things in Australia?” Hayley asked at his side. “Or is it just a Baz Kerrigan thing?”
Heart banging against his chest, he turned.
She cocked an eyebrow at him, expression the very definition of sardonic. “Well?”
He buried his hands in her hair and kissed her. Made love to her mouth, worshipped it with his tongue and lips and teeth.
More than one passing pedestrian grumbled and protested. More than one told them to get a room.
He kissed her deeper. Branded the sweetness of her taste, the soft warmth of her lips, and the fierce hunger of her tongue on his mind. On his soul.
She moaned, her palms smoothing up his back, his neck.
Head spinning, he pulled away, extracting himself from her arms. “See you later, gorgeous.”
She didn’t move when he turned and continued walking.
If she had, if she’d stilled him with a gentle hand…
Gutless wonder. That’s what you are, Kerrigan. A chicken-shit, gutless bloody wonder.
He waved down a passing taxi, climbed into it, gave the driver the hostel’s address and slammed the door shut.
And opened it again, climbing out.
Fuck. He wasn’t walking away from this. It was too perfect. Too—
Hayley was gone. No sign of her.
He’d either burned the bridge, or she’d had a gutful of him.
Clearly Life is telling you to get your arse going.
He sucked in a shaky breath. “Alright. Done. Get back home. Now.”
He climbed back into the taxi. “Let’s go.”
He didn’t look back at the spot Hayley had been standing. He wanted to. Fair dinkum, did he want to. But he didn’t.
Instead, he pulled his phone from his pocket, checked what time it was in the Outback and ran his uncle.
“G’day, Uncle Lack,” he said when Lacky answered. “Howya goin’?”
“What the bloody hell you doing ringin’? It’ll cost you a bloody fortune.”
Baz chuckled. “Yeah yeah. Consider yourself lucky I even remember you exist, you old bastard.”
Lacky laughed. “Who are you again? Barry? Brian?”
A wave of warmth washed over Baz. Lacky was a typical Outback bloke: he didn’t do open displays of affection, he didn’t do sloppy sentiment, he didn’t do compliments.
“How are you going, Lack?” he asked, a band tightening around his chest.
“Alright. Still got all my hair.”
Lacky had, as long as Baz could remember, been as bald as a cue ball.
“I’ve just delivered the last of your items. The camera belonging to Ansel Adams is now with Natalie Miller.”
“Bewdy.” Happiness threaded through the single word. “What’s your movements next? Where you headed?”
“Thought I might come home.”
Silence greeted his answer.
“Lack? Uncle Lacky?”
“Think you should hang around over there for a while. Enjoy the sights, the people.”
“The sights have got nothing on the Outback. Too many people. And there’s no Vegemite over here. Should’ve brought me own.”
“I’ll send you some.”
Baz laughed, even as the band wrapped tighter around his chest. Something was up with his uncle. “Nah, I’m good,” he said. “I’ll jump on the first flight I can find heading to Australia and—”
“Don’t be a bloody dickhead, son.”
Baz blinked. “A what?”
“Charlie tells me you’re having a great time over there.”
“How the hell does Charlie Baynard know what I’m doing in the US? He’s still in the Outback, isn’t he?”
Lacky chuckled. “He is. Having a beer with the rest of the Fly-boys back home as we speak, in fact. But Baynard hasn’t always been just a cop in the Outback, son. To quote one of your favorite movies, he has a particular set of skills.”
Baz’s eyebrows shot up. “I don’t know what that means, and I’m almost too scared to ask.”
“Scared?” Lacky grunted. “The only bloody thing you’re scared of is being abandoned by the people you love, and seeing as you don’t let yourself love anyone—with the exception of yours truly—you’ve lived a pretty safe life.”
“Bloody hell, mate. Don’t worry about hurting my feelings there, eh?”
Lacky laughed—his typical dry bark that spoke volumes. “Baz, I worry about your feelings every bloody day. Have done since you were born and my bastard brother and his wife took off and left you. How your heart’s doin’ has been my focus for longer than you could know. Why do you think I sent you on this adventure? I saw you emotionally shut down when we found out I had cancer. I saw the life leave you.”
A hot ball rolled in Baz’s gut. “So you sent me away?”
“Bloody oath I did. And I’m glad. I saw more life in your face, heard it in your voice, when you were with Natalie Miller’s cousin than there’s been for a long bloody time.”
“Hayley?” The hot ball rolled again. “What…what do you know about Hayley? How do you know about Hayley?”
Lacky snorted. “I love you, son. Y’think I’m sending you off into the world without keeping track of you?”
“Wait wait wait.” Baz shook his head, frowning. “Define were with.”
“Talking, doing shots at the bar—I’m gonna give you an ear-bashing over that when you get home, by the way—kissing on the footpath outside Pat’s Pub.”
“How do you know this?”
“Told you; Baynard hasn’t always just been a cop. I like Hayley. And she likes you. Now stop being a gutless bloody wonder and tell that taxi you’re in to turn around and take you back to the pub.”
Scrubbing at the back of his neck, Baz closed his eyes. “While I appreciate the…unnerving gesture, Lack, I’m coming home. I’m not leaving you while you’re fighting cancer. I can’t do that to you, mate. Hayley and I had…had an amazing night. And if I had time, I think we could have more…an amazing relationship. But I don’t have time. You don’t have time. So I’m coming—”
“I got the all-clear from the specialist the other day, Baz.”
“What?” Baz straightened in the cab’s seat. The gentle happiness in Lacky’s voice stirred something deep inside him. “What do you mean, the all-clear?”
“The doc in Sydney—the oncologist—cleared me. I’m in remission. No cancer. It’s gone.”
“No cancer?”
Lacky chuckled. “No cancer.”
“Fuck a bloody duck, Lacky.” Baz fisted his hand in his hair. “You didn’t think to lead with this?”
Lacky laughed. “And miss this convo? No bloody way.”
Baz shook his head, a ragged chuckle scraping at his throat. “You bloody bastard.”
“Yep. Talk to you later.”
And with that, Lacky ended the call.
“Bastard,” Baz muttered.
“Everything okay?”
He looked up, finding the taxi driver’s frowning reflection in the rearview mirror. “All good.” Hell, could the bloke hear his heart thumping? “Listen, could you chuck a yewie and take me back to where you picked me up?”
A roaring pressure filled his head. A thrumming urgency.
He jiggled his legs, watching the world outside as the driver headed back in the direction they’d come from.
Would Hayley still be at Pat’s Pub? Would she still want to talk to him—fuck, have anything to do with him after his chicken-shit act?
His gut clenched. Guess he was about to find out?
The cab had barely pulled to a halt outside the pub when Baz gave the driver some notes—more than the fare required, judging by the happy grin on the man’s face—and hurried from the backseat. He ran for the door, yanked it opened and damn near threw himself over the threshold.
Where was she?
He scanned the muted interior, the smells and sounds of the place stirring a familiar sense of home in him. Pubs the world over smelled the same; sounded the same. It was only the program playing on the television, or the music on the jukebox that really differed.
No sign of her.
Food. Natalie… What had she said? Something about Sunday…
Searching for the entry into the restaurant side of the pub, he swiped at his mouth with his hand.
Bloody hell, when had he ever felt so nervous?
“Ah.” Pulse quickening, he strode across the pub’s floor and into Sunday’s Side.
His eyes adjusted to the change in lighting. His chest tightened at the sight of Natalie and Ewan sitting at a table together.
Just Natalie and Ewan. No Hayley.
“Fuck.”
Balling his fists, he walked over to them.
“G’day, Nat.” He smiled at Natalie and then at her husband. “Ewan. Any chance you could tell me where Hayley is?”
“She went back to her apartment to do some work,” Natalie answered with her own smile. At the exact same time Ewan said, “Why do you want to know?” with a frown.
Her apartment. Bewdy. He knew where that was.
“Ta, love.” Grinning, he cupped Natalie’s face in his hands and smacked a kiss on the top of her head. “Onya.”
“Hey,” Ewan burst out, even as Natalie started to laugh.
Skipping backward, Baz grinned wider and pointed at Ewan. “I’m a nice bloke. You’ll grow to like me. Promise.”
“What the—” Ewan began to straighten to his feet.
Baz didn’t wait to see if he finished the motion. Heart hammering in his chest, he turned and damn near bolted from the restaurant. Through the pub. Out onto the footpath.
He ran. Ignoring the curious looks from the people around him, he ran. Towards Hayley’s apartment.
Time to stop being scared.
Time to live.
Lifting her stare from the tub of butter pecan Häagen-Dazs in her hand, Hayley frowned at her door buzzer.
Whoever was pressing it downstairs could just take a hike. She wasn’t in the mood to be social. Or cordial. Or human.
Or, to be honest, an adult.
“Nope.” She stabbed her spoon into the melting ice cream. “I’m done with being an adult today. Being an adult sucks. I’m going to be a sulky child for the rest of the—”
Her buzzer cut the thought short.
Letting out a shaky sigh, she unfurled from her armchair and stomped across to her door. It was probably Natalie. Her cousin had wanted her to stay for lunch. Had frowned with confusion when she’d mumbled out a lame apology for not staying.
Her buzzer sounded again.
“Yeah yeah,” she muttered. “Give me a chance.”
She pressed the intercom button. “What?”
“Hey, gorgeous.”
An inferno crashed over her at Baz Kerrigan’s voice.
She swallowed, releasing the com to press her free hand to her lips.
Here. He was here.
Just after she’d spent the last few minutes telling herself it was good that he’d left. An intelligent girl never fell for her rebound. Especially a rebound she’d only just met, who lived on the other side of the world. That was lunacy. And she didn’t do lunacy.
So press the button and tell him to go away.
Lips tingling, throat tight, she pressed her finger to the intercom button. “What do you want?”
No, that’s not what you were meant to—
“You.”
A soft groan fell from her, and she closed her eyes. No no no.
“And to say I’m sorry for being a wanker.”
She shook her head, her finger aching.
If she didn’t ease off on the button, her knuckle would snap.
“Come up,” she croaked, mouth dry.
“Okay,” he answered.
Head spinning, she released the button. God, what was she doing? What did she do?
She dropped her stare to the ice cream in her hand.
Put it away.
Yeah. That was a good idea. Put it away. That was a start.
She hurried to the kitchen, yanked open the freezer, shoved the ice cream container in, and slammed the door shut. Then yanked the freezer back open, pulled out the ice cream, searched for its lid, ran into the living room, snatched up the lid and—after shoving the ice cream-coated spoon into her mouth—put the lid on the container and ran back to the kitchen.
What are you doing?
“Losing it,” she chuckled around the spoon as she returned the ice cream to the freezer again.
A knock sounded on her door.
Her heart crashed up into her throat. She swallowed, stare locked on the closed door.
Oh god.
Cool. Be cool. Be calm and indifferent and dismissive and—
She ran for the door and flung it open.
“Hi.” The spoon fell from her mouth and struck her bare foot, right on her big toe. Grimacing, she grabbed at her toe, wobbling on one foot. “Goddamn it.”
Baz regarded her, eyes dancing. “I love the way you move.”
“Shut up,” she grumbled. “This was not how this was meant to go.”
He lifted an eyebrow. “How was it meant to go?”
Releasing her foot, she scowled at him. “I was going to tell you it’s too late. You were being a moron, and I don’t have room in my life for morons. In fact, I’m still going to tell you it’s—”
He crossed the threshold in one step and, hands tangling in her hair, silenced her with a kiss.
Her bones melted. She moaned into his mouth, opening to him, meeting his hungry tongue with equal craving. Snagging the front of his shirt, she tore it open. Buttons popped, cotton ripped. She didn’t care. She wanted his chest, his heat under her palms.
He growled his approval, deepening their kiss as he dragged his hands down her back to squeeze her ass.
With another growl, he yanked her harder to him, the long, rigid pole of his erection trapped in his jeans grinding against the curve of her belly. She strained up onto tiptoe, needing to feel his arousal closer to her sex.
He chuckled, tearing his lips from hers. “How ’bout we move this elsewhere?”
Stop stop stop. He’s left you. Twice. Three times. Think about that!
Dragging in a deep breath, she disengaged herself from his arms and shook her head. “Not so quick, kangaroo boy. You broke my heart.”
Okay, that was a bit more dramatic than she’d intended.
His jaw bunched. “I didn’t mean to. But you were right. Back at the pub. The guy who did that, who broke your heart? He’s a dick. And not me.” He grimaced, self-contempt flickering across his face. “Not the me I like being.”
She folded her arms over her breasts and studied him. “So…you think you can make it up to me with more amazing sex?”
His lips twitched. “It’s a start.”
Her stomach fluttered. She shook her head. “Not good enough. Why the sudden turnaround?”
A wobbly sigh burst from him and he ducked his head, rubbing at the back of his neck. “I had a phone convo with Uncle Lacky. An ear-bashing, to be honest.”
“Ear-bashing?” Damn, she loved the way he spoke, even when she was pissed at him.
His chuckle was wry. “A lecture. Turns out, this whole trip he sent me on wasn’t so much for him, but for me.”
She frowned. “How so?”
He swiped at his mouth and raked his hands through his hair. “You’re right. I was running from my issues. Getting dumped by your parents, knowing they are out there, living their lives without you, simply because they don’t want you in theirs, that you were an inconvenience to them, kinda screws a bloke up. So I’ve spent my life making sure I’ll never be anyone’s inconvenience again. And in the process kinda forgot what it means to be alive.”
“And what does it mean? To be alive?”
“Connection. And while I’ve fought against it my whole bloody life, getting a taste of it…” He chuckled. “You bloody well shook everything up, Hayley Miller.”
She couldn’t help but grin. “Good. I’m glad.”
“Thought you might be.” His lips curled, a small smile tugging at their corners, before his eyes grew distant. “I don’t like being a coward. And I’ve come to realize life is very much what we put into it. So…” He held his arms out from his sides and met her stare. “Here I am. Back here. In your apartment. Saying g’day. Again. And hoping to bloody god I haven’t fucked up whatever this thing is we have by being a gutless wonder. Have I?”
She narrowed her eyes. “Depends.”
He frowned, his Adam’s apple jerking up and down his throat. “On what?”
“Talk Aussie to me.”
“Whoop whoop ‘Stral? Or bogan ‘Strain?”
She smiled. “Surprise me.”
He studied her, his expression unreadable. And then cleared his throat. “G’day, Hayley. I know I come a gutsa and made you madder than a cut snake, but I’m just wonderin’ if there’s any chance a bonza city sheila like you would like to give it a burl with a bloke from the bush for a bit?”
A soft laugh fell from her. “I have no idea what you just said, but yes.”
He took a step towards her, and then stopped. “Sure?”
She nodded. “Let’s start with the amazing sex and see where it goes from there.”
He grinned and closed the distance between them, sliding his arms around her waist. “Grouse.”
“Grouse?”
Mischief danced in his eyes. “An Aussie word I’ve never used in my life. Roughly translated, it means great. Or in this situation, fair suck of the sav, this woman is amazing.”
She laughed. And then tangled her fingers in his hair and kissed him.
They both came up for air a few seconds later and gazed into each other’s eyes.
“I want to make love to you, gorgeous,” he murmured, brushing his thumb over her bottom lip. “Make up for being a dick.”
Her heart fluttered. “Fine by me.”
He scooped her up, carried her to the sofa and lowered himself onto it.
She straddled his lap, exploring his chest with her hands, tweaking his small, puckered nipples with her fingers.
His pupils dilated, a choppy breath catching in his throat.
“You like that?”
He nodded, and then groaned as she did it again.
“Remember when you made me come just by sucking on mine?” She traced his nipples with the tips of her index fingers, her heart wild as she watched him react to her touch.
“Fuck, yeah.” He squeezed her hips and rolled his own, grinding his imprisoned cock against her pussy. “Will never forget it.”
She smiled, wriggling on his lap a little. “Do you think I could do the same to you?”
Before he could answer, she bent down and captured his right nipple with her lips.
“Holy shit!” he groaned, fisting a hand in her hair. “That feels…”
She moved her mouth to his left nipple, flicking her tongue over its tip before sucking its pebbled form harder into her mouth.
He groaned again, hand in her hair tighter, hand on her hip the same.
At her folds, his cock twitched, an undeniable response to what she was doing to him.
One nipple and then the other, teasing over and over.
With each bite and suck, his moans grew louder, rawer. His hands grew fiercer. “S-so…so good…” The words tore from him in a strangled breath. “So…too…”
He drove his erection harder to her sex, his words dissolving, his hips bucking.
And then, without warning, he pressed her onto her back on the sofa’s cushions, covering her body with his, and took savage possession of her mouth.
Liquid heat flooded her core. Charged pleasure sheared through her. She arched beneath him, clawing at his back. It was as incredible as yesterday. No, more so.
She should be stopping him. She should be laying down some ground rules. So much for being calmly indifferent.
She should—
His lips traveled up to her temple as he cupped the side of her face with one hand. “Will you forgive me?”
“For?” she whispered.
“Wanting you so much I behaved like a wanker?”
A soft chuckle slipped from her. “That is the weirdest compliment I’ve ever had. And the best explanation for crappy behavior.”
He lifted his head and looked down at her. “It was crappy. I’m sorry.”
She licked her lips, heart thumping fast in her throat. “Can I ask a question?”
He nodded.
“How long you planning on staying?”
His jaw bunched as he swallowed. “How long do you want me to stay?”
She searched his eyes, her throat thick. “Can I tell you tomorrow?”
“Alright.”
“Or maybe the next day?”
“Alright.”
She raised her legs and wrapped them around his hips, locking her ankles at the small of his back. “Or the day after that?”
“Day after that is doable.”
Gazing up into his eyes, she pressed her pussy to the hard ridge of his cock. “Day after that might be more likely.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
Her heart beat faster. She licked her lips. “See? Now that’s the kind of answer I like to hear.”
He chuckled. “Did I ever tell you that you have the sexiest fucking eyes on the planet?”
“No. But then, we’ve only known each other for less than twenty-four hours.”
“True.” He lowered his head and brushed his lips over hers. “Remind me to tell you in twenty years or so, okay?”
“Planning to still be here then?”
“Yep.”
She squeezed her legs, drawing his groin closer to hers. “Can you promise me mind-blowing orgasms daily?”
“I’ll do my best. So, at least twenty more years of this? Give or take a few days?”
Grinning, she tangled a fist in his hair and drew his head closer to her. “Crikey, mate,” she murmured. “Hell yeah.”
He laughed. “That is the worst Australian accent I’ve ever heard.”
“Bite me,” she laughed.
“With pleasure.”
And he stripped her naked and proceeded to do just that.
Twenty more years of this?
Best rebound of her life.
The End