CHAPTER SIX

DANE

It’s official. I’m in the fucking Twilight Zone. If you had of told me this morning I’d be standing here with a one-year-old skirting around my feet I would not have believed you.

“Oh, really?” says Haley, speaking into the phone receiver, twirling the loopy phone line around her finger. Who even has a phone on the wall anymore? “Are you sure?” she asks. “It would only be for a night or two.” A pause. “Of course, I understand, Mr. Poperitz. Okay. Yes.”

She hangs up in a huff, turning a page in the phone book—yes, an actual phone book—to dial the next number, probably the fifth or six now.

Standing there in the kitchen, leaning against the wall, I can’t help but notice how great her ass looks in those jeans, cheap as they are. My cock starts to come to life, but my boner soon drops when the baby grabs my leg.

I pull it away fast, looking down at the little bastard. All he’s done is smile and try to crawl towards me. I’m tossing toys at him like they’re going out of fashion, anything to avoid actual contact with the human disease vault.

If I didn’t know better, I’d say the kid actually likes me, but I suppose babies are too stupid to know any better. He’d be into a concrete block if I covered it in tinsel.

The ice storm is showing no signs of abating outside. If anything, it’s getting worse, and here I am, sheltered up in the middle of the apocalypse with a miniature poop machine.

I hear Haley striking out again, hanging up and looking over. “It’s the same story over and over. Part of the town itself is out of power. Everyone is huddling up. To be honest, I’m surprised no one else has knocked on the door yet.”

“Keep trying,” I push.

Haley shakes her head and picks up the phone again, dialing.

The baby—Andy, I think its name is—hands me a drool-covered Buzz Lightyear that looks awfully well-worn.

I shake my head at him. “Ah, no thanks, buddy. He’s all yours.”

I survey the house. It’s big, decorated in typical country attire, though the ornaments and trinkets seem like something from an older generation, from Haley’s folks perhaps. The place could do with a good clean, but I imagine Baby Bjorn here is to blame for that. Given the estrogen-fest, I’m guessing the real ‘dada’ is nowhere to be found. He probably knocked Haley up and headed off to greener pastures. It pisses me off, really, a man neglecting his responsibilities like that.

I put a stop to these thoughts, shifting my eyes to watch Haley again.

She hangs up. Her shoulders slump. She takes a seat at the dining table defeated. “No dice. I hate to say it, but you might not have anywhere else to go.”

“You mean I’m stuck here?”

She lifts her shoulders apologetically. “Looks like it, and hey, it’s not like either of us want this, you know.”

“We can agree on that.”

When I turn around the baby has managed to actually crawl up my leg. He plants a sloppy, disgustingly wet kiss onto my hanging hand, laughing. I wipe it on my jeans and shift back.

Haley sniggers. “Wow. He likes you.”

I ward him off with a red monster truck. “And that’s unusual?”

“It is,” she says. “He doesn’t like anyone, won’t let a stranger come anywhere near him. You must be special.”

Real special, alright. “Does he ever stop drooling?”

“I told you. He’s a one-year-old. Trust me, drool’s the one thing you do want coming out of his mouth.”

I’ve never really understood the attraction to these creatures. Some babies are simply downright ugly. People are too PC to tell it like it is, not that this guy’s so bad. Fuck, if I stare at him long enough he kind of starts to look cute.

One girl I slept with woke up detailing our wedding, the three kids we were going to have (two twin boys and a girl, who she would call Jasmine, “you know, like Aladdin”). I shipped her out the door so fast she didn’t feel it smack her ass on the way out.

I don’t do long term. It’s as simple as that.

Haley’s watching me, her sapphire eyes darting between her son and me. She breathes out and heads back to the phone. “One more try.”

Thank god for that, but the call goes down just like the others.

“Thank you so much, anyhow. I really appreciate you taking the time.” She’s way too polite. She’d thank someone if they were robbing her blind, I’d imagine.

She walks over and sits on the arm of the sofa. She’s not wearing perfume, but there’s a homely, sweet scent about her that’s turning me on something savage. I twist to hide my growing erection, allow myself time to follow her leg up to the soft sweep of her ass. She could be a complete mankiller if she wanted. Slap on some heels, a tight A-line and the guys would be lining up for miles, especially around this backwater town.

“I’m sorry, Dane,” she says, again too polite. “I’ve tried, but you’ll have to stay here, at least until this storm passes over.”

She’s resigned herself to the fact. I don’t think there’s any changing her mind. Messy or not, though, this place is a big step up from the bed bug fuckfest that was the Merit Motor Inn. I let my eyes fall down her body. At least this place has a nice view.

She stands and pats herself down, even though she’s not dirty. Nervous, perhaps? She’s doing her best to avoid eye contact, scared I’ll lay down my alpha voodoo again and have my wicked way with her.

“Why are you in town?” she asks. “Were you just passing through?”

I point upwards. “I was part of the airshow, one of the Red Devils.”

“Was?”

I shrug. “Let’s just say they no longer required the most skillful pilot in the country.”

“Dada!” the baby gurgles again. He really won’t let it go.

Haley ignores him, fixed on me. “You’re not exactly modest, are you?”

“Modest?” I laugh. “I’ve always known I was a winner, always knew I was destined for great things. People might say that kind of thinking is immodest, and I agree. Modesty is not a word that applies to me in any way, and I hope it never will.”

Her eyes narrow as she thinks it over. “I see.”

“You’ve never dated a pilot?” It’s a pointed question.

She laughs, face full of lightness and sincerity. “I can’t say I have. Should I?”

I smile back. “We know how to push all the right buttons,” I tell her.

“I remember,” she replies, blushing and doing her best not to show it.

“We can go upside-down, right side up, all around… not to mention the fact we’re fully licensed to go down even the most demanding of landing strips.”

If she was blushing before, she’s stoplight red now. “I didn’t say you weren’t attractive, but…”

“But?”

She licks her lips, looking left to the window. “I’m not looking for a relationship right now.”

“Who said anything about a relationship? What, you’re allergic to a little fun?”

I see her swallow hard. “I like… fun as much as the next person, but I can’t do this, it, whatever you’re thinking of, now.”

“Your loss.” I shrug.

“Anyhow,” she says, changing the subject rather breathlessly, “I’m more worried about the fact we might lose power here soon if the lines go down.”

I consider going down on something else, tasting her sweet arousal and letting it settle on my palate, licking and lashing at her clit until she’s pleading for release.

The baby burps behind me and once more I’m snapped back to reality.

“I need to go get firewood,” Haley continues, “just in case. So if you’re going to be staying here you can at least be useful and watch my son for a little bit.”

I stand up. “You want me to watch that thing?”

“He has a name.”

“I’m not a babysitter.”

She remains firm. “And I’m not running a hotel here, but I guess we’re all taking on new roles while this storm’s passing through, so please,” she implores. “I really don’t want to take him out in the cold.”

I turn to Andy the Baby, and damn it, he’s hitting me with those big baby blues, a pouty ‘you wouldn’t leave me out in the cold, would you?’ expression on his chubby, cherub face.

I sigh. “I told you. I’m not a kid person.”

“You don’t say,” Haley laughs sarcastically.

An idea strikes me. “Look, why don’t I go out to get the firewood? You can stay here with… Andy.”

She doesn’t put up a fight. “Okay. Sure.”

Clearly, she didn’t want to go outside but was too polite to ask otherwise. She didn’t want to put me out simply because I’m a guest. I consider what kind of person she must be, this kind of self-sacrifice is unknown to me. My folks weren’t big on that at all. It was fend for yourself and fuck the rest, the entire world out to get you.

Probably the same kind of girl that lets a relative stranger finger her, my head fills.

Come to think of it, perhaps this might not be the worst place to be. After all, the kid has to sleep at some point, right?

Haley gestures behind her towards the rear of the house. “Head out through the back door. The wood’s stacked against the shed out there. There’s an axe against the big tree.”

I take in more of her scent as I pass, flash back to our first meeting at the motel and the incredible warmth and wetness of her body. I want more, there’s no doubting that. Question is, how do I get it before I get out of here?

I grab my jacket and sling it on, opening the door and walking out into the cold.

The wind has died down, and it has stopped snowing, but it’s still cold enough to freeze your balls off.

The door closes and I breathe out in a foggy cloud.

I look back at the house.

Oh, who the hell am I kidding? This is going to suck.