CHAPTER TWELVE
Colby’s hard body held her still. Mia just existed. No thinking. No worrying. Nothing. She felt her limp, loose body sprawled on rumpled sheets. Numb satisfaction pulsed. Her fingertips tickled. Blood slowed its screaming rush in her ears. The taste of his kiss lingered, robust and vibrant, on her tongue.
That incredible ride was more than memorable. Repercussions of Colby ricocheted up, down, and all around her mind and body.
It felt like a night of firsts. The first time a man hovered over her, his stomach damp with their perspiration. Though it wasn’t. The first time a man made her cry out his name. No, that was a first. She truly lost control and begged. She cried his name in need and thanksgiving without thought or motivation. Yes, definitely firsts.
This night was different. His piston-powered force drove her to the edge and fell with her. She shuddered, recalling the pained look on his face, his teeth gritted, and muscles contracting around her. He held out for her.
He looked Herculean and chiseled, scarred and battle-ridden. The most handsome man to ever lay eyes on her was now lying on her. And if he stayed like this much longer, Colby could ask her to gun down a bad guy, and she’d pull the trigger without question.
His harsh stubble grazed her chin, his forehead meeting hers. The air was hard to breathe, and she sighed.
This is too much like… Something more.
And she didn’t want something more. She could go with this tonight, letting her fantasy run to its full potential. But more with him was unrealistic. More might very well kill her.
It was dangerous, far more so than gunfights and secret lists. Men like him needed physical release, the clinging of a woman crying out his name. It was good for the ego, good for his game.
“Are you okay, Mia?” His tenor raked a level lower than a rumble.
And then he asked about her feelings? It was too much. She nodded his question away, discounting the weight in his voice, and the tightening in her chest.
The room smelled warm and potent. Like the virile man enveloping her. She’d savor their encounter, but it wouldn’t last nearly as long as she needed it to.
Their breaths and the hum of the air conditioning served up the white noise. A quiet intensity. The calm after the storm. Heck, the calm after the hurricane.
Colby picked his head up and locked eyes with hers. Their fire, the deep brooding that burned in his irises, ignited a heated tremor in her all over again. Shivers ran across her skin. He leaned down to kiss her. Hard and deliberate. The harsh scruff on his face, and the supple slide of his delving tongue made her want to sign up for another round.
“Good. Me, too.” He broke from her but lay close on his side. An arm hung round her waist, hooking their bodies together, maintaining their link. A soothing finger toyed with her belly button, rounding in and out of the shallow indentation.
He loomed like an ominous mountain chain next to her, and she couldn’t help but admire the compact definition of his shoulders and the corded grooves between each ripple of muscles. Solid everywhere, even while relaxed. He was a warrior’s warrior. It made her mouth water.
Colby rolled off the bed. An icy earthquake wicked across her skin. He lumbered toward the bathroom, stretching his arms high overhead, making every muscle from his neck to his ass flex. Her lungs hurt, and only then did she realize she forgot to breathe.
His body was of a caliber that action movie heroes aspired to attain. He leaned over the bathroom sink, twisted the faucet on, and covered his face. After a second splash of water, he let it run, steam rising, framing his profile. Hinged at the waist, folded arms resting on the bathroom counter, he hung his head lax in the flickering bathroom light.
Uh-oh. That wasn’t a good stance.
That seemed a whole lot like regret. And she wouldn’t handle his remorse well. He’d gone hot and cold on her before. She didn’t expect it then, and she didn’t now. What was that saying? Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.
She stared at the ceiling again. Maybe he realized he was stuck with her until Virginia. The one night stand that he couldn’t leave. Whoopsie. Sorry about your luck, Rambo.
“Why are you here with me, Mia?” His head still hung over the running water.
She’d called it, and here it came. He would push her away, his repentance bubbling to the surface like a hot spring. It was so dang cliché. She kept a laugh to herself and pressed her lips flat.
“Don’t worry about me. I’m not the clingy type.” She didn’t want to play the bedroom equivalent of Twenty Questions.
“Christ, Mia. That’s not what I meant.” He tilted his head toward her, raking his eyes across her face. He looked mad, or was that annoyance?
“Well then, Colby, what did you mean?” Sarcasm wasn’t her friend right now, but the snarky shake of her head said otherwise. “That type of question. Your timing. It’s clear to me. No need to backpedal.”
“I meant why haven’t you called the cops? Why are you okay with everything that’s happened so far? Asking why you’re here wasn’t supposed to be an inquisition until you made it one.”
The heck with his interrogation retreat. He knew the answer. There was one reason he was so sure she’d go with him, forcefully or not, in the first place.
“I told you. It was my client’s dying request.”
“No, bullshit. That’s not an acceptable excuse, and you know it.”
“All right. Several people are trying to kill me. Bullets whizzed over my head earlier. I don’t want to be stuffed in a trunk again. Is that acceptable?”
“Nope.” His eyes danced, an eyebrow raised. He needed to back off. He was already ruining her post-coital moment.
“So what do you want me to say?” She rolled her eyes. Why was he pushing her? “You’ll do a better job protecting me than the cops could, and, I don’t have to explain how I came across a secret government document.” Besides, I’m too busy thinking of you naked. “Does that work for you?”
All her climatic residuals were gone, and she blamed the undressed detective running shop from the bathroom.
“You’ve got serious walls built around you, doll. You know that?”
Oh yeah, she knew. Years studying psychology had clued her in. But all the money spent on higher education didn’t matter. She’d known since grade school that parents screwed up kids, and that a bad home life was a serious detriment for normal emotional health.
Walls were a concession for never finding a magical cure. But that was okay. She’d done just fine with her closely guarded psyche.
Well, that was the truth until Colby kissed through all her barriers. She needed to build those up again. Fast.
“I’m a realist. A pragmatist. You’re a one-night-stand man. I can tell. And I got carried away with the moment.”
“You’ve got it all wrong, and you don’t even know it. It’s simple: You’re the deceptive one.” He hung his head back down, facing into the sink. “You look one way. You act another. You say one thing, but I see the wheels turning in that clever head of yours. What you say isn’t what you think. Hell, honey. I know the deceptive deal. But that’s cool if that’s how you want to play it.”
“I’m not even going to dignify your accusations.”
“I didn’t say it was a bad thing.” His half-smile made her stomach rocket into her throat. The man dripped testosterone. It was the freakin’ grand rapid of pheromones in this room. Mia flushed, remembering their bedroom showdown. Her palms itched to run down his strong back. Still carried away in the moment, it seems.
“I saw it in your eyes. You’re just as triggered up as I am. You want the same thing I want. But you don’t know it.” He paused, studying her. “Nah. You know what you want. Don’t you? I admire that. It’s sexy as all hell.”
No way, not-uh. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of calling her out. Her stomach might knot, her jaw might lock, but no way would she admit anything.
She looked back at him. It had been so easy. He didn’t judge, only acted. She trusted him from the moment he carried her into the room, until the second he leaned over the bathroom sink. Then it all came to a screeching halt.
Except, wait. Did he just call her sexy? Whatever. She must ignore him. Turn the tables. Something. Anything. Because he wasn’t throwing on his clothes. And him, naked, was dangerous. Lord, so very dangerous.
“Now who’s psychoanalyzing who?” Why did she sound like that? Oh, no reason. Just because her body was betraying her. She needed it to stop reacting to him.
“Do you ever give honest answers?” He laughed into the towel as he dried off his face, then nailed her with a stare. “When it comes to you, to Mia, not your work or your clients, are you ever sincere about what you want?”
She was earlier in bed. That was about the most honest she’d been. Ever. But she kept that little secret to herself and rolled onto her back. There was no denying that she felt something. But it didn’t matter. Adrenaline. Chemicals. Hormones. They were all arousing. And they were deceptive, not her.
She could psychoanalyze this…their behavior, their glances, and the oppressing emotion that tugged at the edge of her consciousness, but she didn’t want to.
He turned the shower on, and she expected he’d close the door on her any moment now. She earned a door slam. She was being a bitch. And there wasn’t a reason for it, other than to protect her hide.
A shower would be amazing. Hell, right now, it would feel light-years past unbelievable. Steaming hot water would wash away her bitterness and confusion. But for now, she’d wait until her wet noodle legs could carry her to the bathroom.
Mia held a leg inches off the bed, testing it. Limp. Loose. Lax. Yeah, it might be a while.
His hands clasped on her ankles. She jumped, but didn’t get far. He was as stealthy as he was silent. She didn’t have time to stay startled. With a fast tug, Colby slid her to the edge, dropping her feet to the floor. His eyes flared, dark and aroused, a hard line set to his jaw. That, she didn’t expect. Nor did she expect to see him hard for her again.
“Can’t get enough, huh?” And there was the bitch again. She needed to sew her mouth shut because clearly her brain had given up monitoring duty.
“Christ, woman. Major defensive walls. You’ve gotta work on that.”
“Says the big badass who leads a secret life.”
“At least I know what I want, and I’m not afraid of it.” Colby hooked his forearms under hers, dangling her above the carpet. “And I want you. Again.”
She felt weightless, as if her worries fell off when he lifted her up.
His hard-on rubbed against her stomach, instantly welling a heat in between her legs. He walked back into the bathroom, put her down, and stepped into the steaming water.
“Nothing to say, Miss Mia?” His head tilted and gave her a look hotter than the scorching stream behind him. Dark stubble. Dark eyes. Dangerous scar under his eye. A triple threat. But nothing she was scared of.
Water sprayed around his head, but she was stuck in place. He was a risk. A delicious, enticing risk. But one nonetheless.
Colby extended his hand from the shower. Rough and calloused, and damn if she didn’t already know how perfect it would feel against her.
“Come here. I need you next to me.” His voice was an embrace to her fears.
Where she’d been sarcastic and standoffish, Colby was honest and contemplative. Those weren’t the attributes that she knew of him, yet they made perfect sense. She was losing the emotional battle that he didn’t realize she was waging. Without questioning him again, she stepped into his embrace.
“That’s my girl. Such a beauty.” He pushed the hair off of her cheeks, tucking it behind her ears.
The water burned. It was a shade cooler than unbearable, and she pushed into his protective broad chest to escape its sear. His hands trailed from the nape of her neck to cup her bottom, his fingers curling along her backside. She softened into him, lips brushing his chest. He spun them around in one flash move, shielding her from the boiling waterfall, and pressing her against the cold, wet tiles.
The man was on a mission of seduction, and he was winning. Every cell, every inch of her skin readied to beg for him. Ravenous hunger shredded her mind. Her nipples were so hard they hurt, and they pressed into his scratchy chest hair for blistering relief. Her ultra-sensitized body swayed against him for the full effect of his firm physique and heavy cock. She was sore from earlier, but it didn’t stop her most intimate muscles from firing to life again.
His breath teased her ear. His perspiration washed off, and she caught the taste of it on her lips. Strong arms wrapped around her, enveloping her. He smelled of their climaxes.
“Christ. I can’t get enough of you.” His words cracked against her neck. His teeth rasped her, shooting sparks down her spine.
She fingered his cheeks, the rough stubble of the day’s worth of growth abrading her palms. She wanted to explore his chest, his abdomen, but he was pressed so close she couldn’t. Instead, she savored the engorgement rubbing between them. She needed to feel this. To feel him. On her. Inside her. However she could get him.
Water sprayed the back of his head, and it dripped over her. The faint scent from his hair teased hints of sandalwood and amber. Humidity and ecstasy flooded the shower stall, steaming a hazy fog around them. All she could see, all she could feel, smell, and taste was Colby Winters. And she was lost in it all. Deliriously, completely lost.
“I’m telling you. That’s all stress. You wanting me like this—” He bit against her neck, and Mia almost couldn’t finish her thought aloud. “It’s adrenaline. Isn’t this how you normally relax after…doing what it is you do?”
His tongue ran gymnastics down her neck. She tried to ignore it but failed with exceptional flare.
When he stopped the kiss, he said, “Just when you start to relax, you get all keyed up again. I already told you I don’t get stressed.” Colby tightened his grip on her bottom, massaging his fingers into her skin. “But you’re going to keep psychoanalyzing me. Making your educated guesses about what makes me tick, aren’t you? Go on. Build self-protective walls. Practice your frigid glares. I’ll blow through them. Again.”
Hiding her quick breaths was a lesson in the unfeasible. She panted against his chest. “But this is how you relax. Right? I’m trying hard not to get lost in the moment.” Her words came out so muted, she wasn’t sure he heard her.
“No, doll, this,” he slid a testing finger between her legs and teased her, “isn’t normally how I relax. And I’m doing something very wrong if you don’t get lost in the moment. If you’re thinking about anything besides us right now, I’ve got work to do.”
“I am thinking about us.” She tried not to moan, but his fingers gave her no relief. He was doing everything right. From the curl of his caress to the long-suffering in and out, Colby knew how to make her need him.
“In the wrong manner. You’re over-thinking this. I can tell. You’re holding onto something, somewhere. Let it go. Unravel, like earlier. Come for me.” His fingers quickened their pace, blazing within her. “But no, Mia. I don’t do this after my ops. I don’t shower with women and ask about their feelings. I’m flying blind here, babe. No idea what I’m doing, but I’m doing it for you.”
Oh shit. Not what she expected. Not at all.
She tried to breathe. She was so close. “You know what you’re doing.”
“I’m not talking about getting you off. Though I’m loving every second of it.”
“Aw, you make me sound special.”
“Making you moan is special. I like it.” His finger pushed into her aching pussy. Her muscles tightened around it, her jaw fell open and, like he selected the option from a menu, she moaned on cue. “So come on. You were lost in the moment before. What’s so different now?”
This needed to be about adrenaline-driven reactions. No feelings. No emotions. Oh, who’s she kidding? This is perfect, whatever the reason.
Mia lifted one foot and trailed it up the solid muscle of his calf, the scratchy coarse hairs tickling her foot. She widened her stance, allowing him further entry for his erotic assault. Her head rolled against the wall, her cheek turned onto the cool tiles, and she fought the flutter of her eyes. Good God, his fingers did nothing short of the Devil’s dance.
She wanted to answer his questions and meant to explain herself. To say once in bed was fun and uncomplicated. Twice in his arms was too much. But it came out a secretive growl. Wordless and embarrassing.
“That was fucking beautiful.” He slid his finger from her opening, then with two fingers, he repeated the same internal stroke. In and out, over and over again. The pad of his thumb encircled her clit. “Moan for me again.”
He chipped away at her unseen walls, fighting his way into her head.
“I can’t.” She heard the betraying ache as she struggled to speak.
“Liar. I made you scream before. I want to hear it again.”
“Please don’t make me. Please.”
“Why, baby?”
“Cause I’m going to get hurt.”
Dang. It came out before she could stop it. His hand stilled for a heartbeat. No, no. This was why she fought him. He made her more honest than she should be. More than she knew was possible.
“I’m not going to hurt you, Mia.”
“Of course you will. Unintentionally, but hurt just the same.”
“You don’t trust me?”
“I do.”
“Then just relax, and let it all go.”
He raced his thumb against her swollen nub. It was all she could do to keep from grinding on his fingers. The constant push against her tender flesh, still raw from earlier, sensitized every nerve ending. All her senses fired. Including her mind.
With every steam-filled breath, her want multiplied. Mia didn’t remember his arm moving round her to support her. Her legs were open, her bottom resting on his forearm. She leaned back against the tiles. She was so close.
Colby flexed his fingers into her. The press of his palm against her clit challenged her to erupt. She clenched around his fingers. An all-masculine grunt poured from him, its timbre catapulting her closer to explosive orgasm. It revved from her clit, into the far reaches of her limbs. She sucked in the falling water. His name fell from her gasps. She thrashed side to side under the spray, and he kept her firmly in place against the cold wall. Her body jerked, suffering through every last wonderful ripple of her orgasm.
“Fuck yes, Mia. That’s my girl.”
His girl. He sounded possessive and greedy. And that was exactly what she needed.
Colby crushed his lips onto hers, easily forcing her mouth open, and lashed his tongue across hers. As she came down from her high, Mia circled her hands around his shaft and stroked one hand on top of the other.
He pulled back from kissing her. A this-really-sucks smile played on his face, and she had no idea why. “I’m aching for you again.”
“What’s stopping you?” She kissed a scar under his collarbone, trailing her tongue along the ridge of his shoulder.
“I don’t have another condom.”
Talk about a mix of disappointment and frustration. His voice matched his this-sucks grin.
Mia tightened her grip on his substantial erection. “Not a perfect solution, but I’m nothing if not inventive.”
She grabbed the travel size soap and sudsed her hands, raising a do-you-wanna brow.
He nodded, chin jutting hard. “Hell, yes.”
Bubbles coated her hands, foaming to her wrists. She ran his length, the small bar of soap still in one hand, before cupping his tight sac. He flexed against her motion and an approving groan broke free. Now that was special.
The soap bar slipped from her hands, landing on the floor, and spun with the draining water. She traveled her hands to his head, then thumbed his crown with each stroke.
Colby covered one strong hand around hers and pumped in time with her. His abdominal muscles tightened, and his hard thighs contracted. The already taut skin on his body stretched, gleaming under the water. His toes dug into the tile floor. His bicep flexed as they shared the stroke. His fingers wrapped so tight around her hands on him, she thought it might hurt. But it did nothing more than make him harder.
It was her turn now. “I want to hear you.”
He gritted his teeth, an intense look of concentrated enjoyment plastered across his face. “I haven’t exactly been quiet.”
“Come for me.” Tonight was liberating. He was liberating. She said what she wanted and went after it. Let the sky high walls tumble, and apprehensions vanish. “Right now, Colby. Come for me.”
A curse escaped his mouth, and his entire body clenched. She massaged him against her wet stomach as he came, pulsing his seed across her belly. His cock jerked and spurted again, hot streams jetting on her. He leaned his head on his forearm above her head, his chest heaving.
“Mia.” He sucked in a raspy breath.
They stood there, not moving until the hot water began to cool. Colby turned the shower off and grabbed a towel from the nearby rack. He wrapped it around her, moving his hands down her back and sides. She was jelly. If he hadn’t held her upright, she’d have melted into the floor.
He held her close, maybe sensing her complete fulfillment, and found his own towel. He ran it roughshod over his body, wicking the wet drips off him more than drying himself.
They hadn’t really bathed, but the hot water more than made her feel clean.
“You’re unbelievable,” she whispered against his shoulder. “I’ve never come like that before. I’ve never…said what I wanted.”
“You did in bed earlier tonight.”
“That was heat of the moment. Here. Now. I was cognizant of it.”
“You and your therapy words. Honey, you’ve been cognizant of us since we first kissed.” He pushed a wet strand of hair behind her ear. “I’ve never wanted a woman the way I want you.”
He wanted her. Simple as that.
“You wore me out.” She smiled at him, a tiny laugh escaping. “I’m exhausted. More than exhausted, really. Are you tired?”
He caught her eye, evidently proud to have done so. His smile threatened his mulish exterior. “You want to stay here?”
Mia nodded. “Where else would we go?”
“We could keep driving, if you wanted us to head home.”
“I want to sleep next to you, with you, in your arms.” Saying it aloud took her breath away. Bravery was a good fit.
Colby stilled and didn’t respond.
Oh no. Maybe it was a very bad fit.
Mia pinched her eyes closed, embarrassed. Why did she confess her secrets to him? That wasn’t smart. No. It was flat out stupid.
“Come on, doll.” He dropped his towel on the floor, standing gorgeous and naked in front of her, and he pried hers loose from her talon grip. A chill danced across her skin. “Dry sheets will be so much better than these crappy-assed towels. Let’s warm up under the covers.”
She took his hand, plodding behind him, dumbstruck. He threw back the comforter on the already rumpled bed, adjusted a few pillows, and lifted her onto the mattress. Before Mia could crawl through the rough fabric to the far side of the bed, his warm body sought and found hers. He pulled her against his arm, flipped another pillow behind his head, and nuzzled against the back of her wet hair.
“That’s not what I thought you were going to do,” she said.
“Welcome to the club.”
“What does that mean?”
“You haven’t done a single thing I’ve expected of you either.”
“Oh.” Oh? That was all she could say? But her mind was exhausted, and he was a puzzle she couldn’t figure out.